I’m not entirely convinced of the racist part, but I am admittedly an extreme skeptic about nearly everything. I mean… it’s probably true, but all we have to go on is Sal’s extremely biased account of her childhood, and Linda did marry a black man so… I’m curious to hear what Linda has to say for herself.
That’s exactly what I’m saying. Even the most fair-minded person has her biases, and Sal isn’t exactly fair-minded. I just get the feeling there is more to Sal’s childhood than Sal is willing or able to see. Her mom may not be the super-villain she imagines – only a flawed and imperfect person like everybody else. But, I may be wrong.
You’d be surprised how many racist people marry black people. Racism takes more forms than hurling slurs and actively preaching hate. It’s oftentimes far more subtle.
Linda is probably definitely not racist in her own view of herself. She is, after all, fine with black people as long as they fit into the box she has assigned them. That box is informed by colorism, sexism, ableism, and respectability politics. And she isn’t a horrible person! On a surface level encounter she probably comes across as just FINE. It is just when you are around her longer that the more corrosive elements of her prejudices seep out.
Exactly. You’ve got your outright “I hate these people and don’t want them anywhere near me” bigots, but bigotry can also come in other, less blatantly obvious (to others outside the group) forms.
In fact I’d argue the most common forms of bigotry are the more subtle ones because they’re much more insidious. They’re easier to overlook and more tolerable to society which allows those kinds of views to gain a foothold and spread.
One super common type is the condescending/paternalistic variety where the person would never consider themselves bigoted because they (according to them) certainly don’t think *untrue* negative things about said group and have “black/disabled/female/gay/etc” friends! Their bigotry tends to take the form of “affectionate” superiority. They will tolerate or even befriend/marry/adopt members of the marginalized group, but still look down on the group as a whole, and may consider themselves a Really Good Person for “elevating” members of that group by associating with/“helping” them.
Some good examples of this type of bigotry are: white saviorism, “disability parents” (parents of disabled or ND kids who are ironically often ableist despite viewing themselves as disability advocates), the whole “love the sinner, hate the sin” thing (Christians who swear they don’t hate you, they’re just trying to save you because they care! They’re judging your entire identity as Wrong out of love!), and the entire incel movement (men who put women up on a pedestal, but in a super objectifying/dehumanizing way, while simultaneously being incredibly hostile towards them).
They often will view select members of the group as better than the rest because they have “overcome” the group’s perceived inferiorities or are the “right kind” of that type of person. Often then”right kind” is a marginalized person who experiences internalized or lateral bigotry and does their best to conform to the standards of the privileged or hide/downplay their own identity while looking down on those who don’t, basically tolerating or even agreeing with the bigotry towards their own group.
There’s something of a symbiotic relationship between paternalistic bigots and marginalized people with internalized bigotry. The latter gains a tiny taste of privilege by gaining some approval from the bigots in power (though never as much as the privileged group and it comes at the expense of other marginalized people) while the former gets to point to that person as an example of why they’re not actually bigoted/why their bigotry is correct
(Leading to classics such as: “I can’t be racist, I have a black friend/husband/daughter!” “well my disabled friend said it’s okay to accuse people of faking if they don’t look disabled” “my gay friend agrees with me that gay people should be more subtle in public” “my wife doesn’t like feminism and agrees that women are no longer oppressed and just complain too much”)
or even use a loved one’s marginalization as a shield or to get attention/victimize themselves (such as abled parents with a disabled child or white parents with a non-white child who use their kid as a prop while centering themselves/their struggles or painting themselves the savior)
Linda may not be the extremely obvious, mustache twirling, “purify society” kind of racist, but she is most likely the other type of racist, and probably considers her husband the “right kind” of black man because he manages to avoid matching certain stereotypes/manages to be the “ideal minority”. We haven’t got a lot of insight into Charles yet but it’s probably a safe assumption that he holds at least some internalized racism, based on his comment about Sal’s hair, and the fact that he either agrees with or at least tolerates Linda’s treatment of Sal and comments about Marcie (since he never seems to object to it).
I imagine Linda likely holds Charles (and their kids) to an excessively high standard and Charles and Walky (at least as far as she knows) have managed to meet her expectations, while Sal hasn’t. In her mind, her attitude towards Sal isn’t racism (and she’d likely be extremely offended by the suggestion that it is)* to her, it’s probably a resentment that she feels Sal has squandered/doesn’t appreciate the “opportunities” she’s been given (via her proximity to Linda’s whiteness and her dad’s efforts to be a model minority). In Linda’s mind, every mistake Sal makes is her carelessly taking that “gift” for granted and confirming negative racial stereotypes.
*Obviously it IS racism, just explaining how someone like Linda would probably see themselves and the mental gymnastics involved in a racist marrying a black person.
(Omg sorry this got so long, sometimes I type too much in an effort to explain things thoroughly)
She may simply, on a gut level, not think of her husband as “Black”. There are indeed racists who have exceptions for individual Black people who are kind of “honorary white people” to them.
Look into Dunbar’s Number for an interesting insight to this conundrum. Robin Dunbar is an anthropologist who noticed a pattern in medieval villages, factory workers, and any other group of humans: you can only closely know between 150 and 300 people. All the rest get categorized under biases.
To closely know someone means you’re current with their life and they’re current with your life. So I might be current with details of a celebrity’s life, but they aren’t close because they have no clue who I am. Those medieval villages averaged around 200 people, the theory goes, because once you have enough for two groups of 150, there’s the strong likelihood of forming an us-vs-them mentality and having one group vote themselves off the island. Taken to the extreme, you end up with groups like Joyce’s former congregation or the 1% whose position insulates them from getting accurate views of other people.
Long intro, but Walky’s Mom is obviously close with her husband. She knows him, and he knows her. But that’s not enough to change the pattern of “White people good, Black people uncertain if not dangerous” drilled into her brain during a racist upbringing.
And as we all know, it’s impossible to marry someone you’re bigoted against. Which is why misogynists never have wives!
And this isn’t aimed at you specifically, but it’s getting weird how many people in the comments are trying really hard to see Linda as anything but racist again. I’m seeing a lot more ‘It’s sexism/Sal’s just the older twin/It’s Sal’s behaviour/Sal’s misunderstanding/Walky’s just more ‘manageable’/etc.’ than was the case a few years ago.
I’m worried I come across as apologetic when I talk about her, I think I have a slightly more charitable take on her than most, but even the most charitable take possible with her with is still a really unpleasant person who’s been a bad parent to both her children and was unquestionably racist towards her daughter’s best friend.
I think some of us are working to keep judgment suspended until we have enough facts (as opposed to emotionally-laden reports of things we haven’t seen) to make a precise judgment rather than a sweeping approximate one. What particular species of horrible person, if you will, so that we can despise that which is despicable and endorse that which is endorsable. Nobody is 100% bad.
That may well be, but then I wonder what kind of ‘facts’ they’re waiting for and, on a narrative level, why they think it’d be a good idea for the answer to be ‘actually the racism is all in the black woman’s head and it’s a big misunderstanding’.
If I’m gonna destroy the underpinnings of someone’s worldview, I need to understand the superstructure in detail so I know where to place the charges, or I mayn’t cut the right members and the structure won’t collapse. Good enough?
I get that and I can respect wanting to know what specific ‘flavour’ of awful you’re dealing with, but yeah, the reluctance to have racism as a key part of that superstructure and insisting it must actually be something else is grating. Especially when that would result in, as Willis put it, a storyline where it turns out the racism is in the black woman’s head all along.
Yeah, it’s important to remember that as fiction, there are ways to telegraph to the readers what conclusions we are supposed to draw.
As someone with progressive views, Willis is unlikely to be writing a story where a black woman’s perceived experience of racism is actually all in her head. Because that would be a pretty awful message given how often marginalized people are told they’re overreacting/reading too much into things when they try to point out micro aggressions and other forms of bigotry.
And as others have said, it’s generally good practice, even IRL when you don’t have all the facts, to not repeatedly insist the marginalized person may be mistaken. My policy if I’m not sure is to avoid commenting on the situation as the last thing a victim of bigotry needs is more people telling them they might be wrong about what they’ve experienced.
And while it’s not a real human being told they’re wrong about what they experienced here, the constant repeating of that sentiment even about a fictional character’s experiences echoes all the many times victims of bigotry experience that kind of doubt or gaslighting IRL.
I don’t think the “Misogynists have wives” is really a good analogy. Sexism is all about women properly fitting into their “proper” role as sex objects, wives or mothers. Misogynists want wives, but they want them properly controlled and limited.
There’s no real parallel there for racists marrying. If there’s any kind of a parallel, it would be more like a racist having black servants – as was so common back in the day.
The fetishization and objectification of black men by white women is a massive thing though. I don’t think I’d go as far as to say it’s the same, society is still patriarchal etc etc but the point still stands that just because you marry someone doesn’t mean you don’t dehumanize them. My theory? Linda thinks Charles is “one of the good ones”, he’s not even black i mean not really. He’s half white himself, he’s different from those uncivilized brutes. All that plus probably a little classic racist fetishization. And a sense of ownership given they have a sort of “yes dear…” “Go ask your mother” type of relationship
All subconscious of course. Because Linda’s good people, of course she’d never think of her dear husband like that
All good points. It’s just that specific analogy I don’t like precisely because for sexism has so long been precisely about dehumanizing women and marrying them.
It’s not a perfect analogy, but the point is it is possible to marry someone you’re bigoted against. If it doesn’t work for you, swap it for homophobic women with gay friends, ableist assholes with disabled partners, etc.
I dunno, while obviously no one type of bigotry is precisely the same as another, and individual scenarios may manifest in different ways, I think it’s a pretty reasonable analogy. And I say this as a woman.
All forms of bigotry have some element of feeling that members of that group have a “proper place” (a place that is in some way inferior to the person of privilege). Racists still want people of other races to behave in certain ways, fill certain roles, “know their place in society”, etc. whether that place is “not a member of society at all” or “part of society but a less important/less respected part than me” or “part of society as long as they conform to my precise expectations of who they should be/how they should look or act.”
So I guess I don’t really get the objection to the analogy. Like BBCC said, swap in any other group, ultimately the point is having affection for someone doesn’t mean you can’t judge them unfairly or have bigoted feelings about a marginalized group they are part of, even if the exact way the dynamic manifests isn’t identical.
I would argue that it doesn’t even necessarily matter if Sal is right or not that racism made her the unfavorite. Whether or not that was the initial cause, the effect was still the same. Walky got preferential treatment and Sal got constantly treated as not good enough.
(Personally, I suspect it was a combo of subconscious racial bias + sexism that Sal got hit with. And Linda would probably only ever be able to realize the sexism, if she did a WHOLE lot of soul-searching.)
She may have an issue with dark-skinned women specifically – also, there was a VERY boundary-crossing MadTV skit called “Inside Looking Out”, in which Jordan Peele played a black man in a relationship with an EXTREMELY racist white woman (played by Nicole Parker).
You can overcome a bias. I’m not saying you can become unbaised, although that is also true. You can, conditionally, overcome a bias, on a case-by-case basis. It happens all the time.
I always kind of thought it was more likely she was sexist rather than racist. Promoting the son rather than the daughter is common with individuals who have internalized sexism.
Of course, it’s fully possible that she’s awful in more than one way–sexism and racism are hardly incongruent.
But I think there’s plenty of clear evidence of racism in the things we’ve seen portrayed in the strip. The way she discusses Marcie makes it clear that race-bias is part of her worldview, so at that point, it becomes pretty clear that Sal’s right about it also factoring into their relationship.
I mean it’s been pretty explicitly indicated and stated in-comic that Linda is racist. Sal pointed it out to Walky who, upon reflection, now agrees with that interpretation.
And while Sal’s assumption could be mistaken, there have been enough context clues/microaggressions to suggest she isn’t. Also it just wouldn’t make sense narratively for Willis to plant that kind of red herring, make readers think this is an important story about racism, and then go “just kidding she’s actually sexist!”
Though I do agree it’s entirely possible it’s both! It seems rare for someone who expresses some kind of bigotry to *only* be bigoted about one single group. Like ants, if you see signs of one kind of bigotry, odds are a few more are lurking nearby!
She’s never going to be as bad because I frankly don’t think she’s got attempted murder and supervillain costumes in her, but most parents that suck don’t either so she can still feel pretty awful
I think how directly you caused that harm is a pretty important thing to consider. Linda managed to badly mess up both of her kids, but in an ‘evil parents’ scale she falls well short of trying to murder people.
Yeah, while I do not know what the experience of being a biracial kid with a racist parent is like, just reflecting on whether I’d rather have an ableist/sexist parent as a disabled woman or a parent who orchestrates a kidnapping/tries to *kill* me to “save” me from myself, if I were forced to choose one of those two, I’d definitely prefer the ableist/sexist parent.
It would still be awful and damaging obviously, but Blaine and Ross are on a whole extra level of trauma-inducing (plus bonus splash zone trauma inflicted on everyone around their kids!). 😬
I never quite understood why Sal or Walky didn’t (or couldn’t) ask Billie to help with Marcie’s surgery? Seems Billie’s family had the money, and even at that age, she might have been able to work her parents for it.
I’m so jealous you have becky!! I’m gonna shoot my shot, before changing this email i was Ruth… come on joyce, becky, or dina!! or Carla cuz trans girls are always awesome even when they’re insufferable trolls with a heart
Walky probably didn’t care enough at the time, and if Sal had asked Billie/Jennifer I imagine that Linda would have found out about it. She already took Sal’s money so she couldn’t help, I imagine she would have been upset that Sal was trying to “waste someone else’s money on someone of no value.”
She may not be as bad as those two, but that’s a very low bar to clear. She wanted to get Amber kicked out of school because her father kidnapped her baby boy, despite the fact that he also kidnapped her and the whole purpose for doing so was to force her out of school so he did not have to pay for her to attend said college.
That’s right, she wanted her son’s kidnapper to get his way. The kicker was that was the girl that Walky was more or less dating at the time.
Oh my god. This is not the microaggression I was anticipating, Linda zeroing in on the white girl as being David’s significant other, but in retrospect, boy is it not surprising.
Ugh.
The sick feeling in my stomach is not ENTIRELY from the pound of carrot jerky I just ate.
(Everyone… SLICE your carrots before dehydrating them, or they turn into chewing gum!)
That part about “it definitely being” Joyce makes me think Linda did see who Walky was really whispering to but wants him to pretend otherwise to please her.
Eh, when I read the archives of a comic I’ll sometimes check the comments section of pages I think might have gotten interesting reactions, and I figure I’m not the only one
….. that was a thousand times worded wrongly, and I blame my surgery meds.
What I meant was that, out of the three main targets of the kidnapping (Joyce, Amber, Becky), Amber’s dad would not go to a school with a gun in the middle of the day. The attack on Amber the night before was done at night. Joyce’s church was 1000% the instigator in blatantly attacking the kids. Linda’s response, when she found out who Blaine was, was to try to get Amber punished.
Linda would totes magoats bow to the will of the church over some random sicko.
At this point I think Willis’ long-term goal in this series is for Joyce and Walky to date or at least have some sort of romantic thing with every single character in the cast that it would even somewhat make sense for them to date in this universe *except* each other.
Linda’s fridge is adorned with that one It’s Walky! strip where Mike says that Sal’s new hairstyle really brings out her “huge– oh Christ no, joke aborted
Wow, Walky.
I love you.
I often support you in the comments.
But you let not only Sal, but also Lucy be blindsided by Linda?
I’m not mad.
I’m just disappointed (Sal’s mad).
Actually, I may need to correct myself; this might be Thursday.
In which case it would be a long weekend.
I was trying to figure it out,
and going by Lucy’s clothes,
the date of the comic competition (not the right word, but I’m tired) which I believe was a Friday,
then a jump to Sunday (we see Lucy leaving church with Becky and Sierra),
then more outfit changes up til she asks Sal about a double date where she also mentions it’s been 8 days of dating Walky,
and today is the next day.
Walky asked her out to dinner the night he got hot.
If Lucy is counting nights and days separately when she says it’s been 8 days, then that would be 8 nights and 8 mornings, Thursday morning, and today would be Friday morning.
If she counts the nights and days the same, then day 8 was Wednesday, etc.
That said, I’ve been working under the assumption that the day of the comic competition was Friday, two mornings after the first dinner date, mainly because I remember it being for Friday and they also had class that day (my school didn’t have classes on the weekend).
If the competition was actually on Saturday, then there was no skipped day between it and the leaving church scene, and this is actually Friday.
I’m just confusing myself now, but, long story long, it’s one or the other.
The comic competition was on Friday and Trial and Sarah was Sunday.
Meaning Don’t Stop Billie-ving and This Was Halloween are Monday, Bring Me to Life Drawing was Tuesday, Turning Saints Into the Sea is Wednesday, Joementum was Thursday and this storyline is Friday.
There wasn’t a skipped day. You seem to be missing a storyline in your calculations.
I wasn’t counting storylines.
I was counting Lucy’s outfit changes, like I said.
The problem is that Lucy didn’t show up in one of the storylines at all: Bring Me to Life Drawing.
So there was a skipped day (of specifically Lucy’s outfit changes).
Two actually.
Saturday and, I guess, Tuesday.
So I was right that today was Friday in my original thinking, and I was right in how many outfits Lucy had been shown wearing.
I was wrong to use that as my basis to determine the number of days.
And I didn’t know there’s supposed to be a storyline per day.
Good to know.
That will make stuff like this easier in the future.
Thank you for helping to clear my confusion, cuz I was really going in circles for a bit.
That’s fair. I forgot Lucy wasn’t in that one. But yes, storylines are usually one per day, with time skips being marked. The exception is This Was Halloween, which doubles with Don’t Stop Billie-ving, because most of it is a flashback to Halloween.
Friday has been considered the weekend for as long as I’ve been alive.
My dictionary on my iPad specifically defines it as Friday evening through Sunday evening.
“They’re Freshman in college, they’re twice as smart as you were at that age, they’re Freshman in college, they’re twice as smart as you were at that age…”
My mantra I repeat to myself when characters fumble this hard. He mentions out loud after Dorothy pushes him towards Lucy that asking out a black girl is likely to upset his mother, and he still doesn’t warn her (or let Sal know that they were coming). Godspeed.
I am going with the option B I have ADHD and even when I am not on my medicine if someone tells me something a dozen times I will remember it most of the time it’s maybe twice or thrice. She probably called left a voice mail but like most people under 45 Walky didn’t even listen to it.
I’m the ADHD that requires constant reminders from other people up to day of (especially day of) because i will both forget it immediately and (mostly) because I never know what day it is.
However, I also agree B is more likely. Do people even check their voicemail?
My mom does when she has new ones. She’s over 45 though. I imagine I would too if I could set it up – it’s handy to have a way to leave a message if you needed to call me and I couldn’t answer.
And this is why I always explicitly negotiate “no answering service” as part of my phone contracts. My phone company of choice had no problem accommodating this, I’m not sure how others would respond but I’d imagine it should be similarly easy.
I mean that’s awesome that you can do that but it’s worth remembering that not all ADHD brains are identical and different people have different degrees of struggles with it. Like Bogeywoman, I absolutely need repeated reminders about stuff because I will still forget even if someone has reminded me multiple times.
For me the issue isn’t the frequency, it’s the timing. Some info just does not get filed into longterm memory (or if it does, I can’t seem to access my long term memory consistently) so unless I can do the thing I need to do RIGHT NOW, there is a good chance I’ll forget about it over and over again no matter how many times I’m told.
Literally once my kid reminded me for the 3rd time I needed to order her new markers. I said I would go to my tablet right away and order them so I didn’t forget again. By the time I had walked across the hall into my room, I’d already forgotten.
The solution for people like us is to use repeated reminders, but specifically to set them up so they occur at opportune times. I.e. so we get reminded when we can actually take the required action. For example, Walky may have forgotten to tell Sal because she didn’t happen to be nearby every time he got an email about their visit and he forgot by the time he saw her, but if she had been in the room one of those times, he would’ve been able to tell her.
It’s also possible he forgot to even check his email, or did check it but when he saw the emails he decided to look at them later, or his inbox is a horrific nightmare of chaos (this is a frequent ADHD problem) and he missed those emails among the other 1000+ unread ones he still needs to sort through. (ALL of these have been reasons why I didn’t deal with an email at various times)
While this is probably true, this sort of sentiment about someone who likely has ADHD bums me out.
He’s a fictional character but for those of us who aren’t, it’s hard to tell if the tone here is intended to be disparaging/critical or just an honest assessment that this is something he struggles with.
Many people with ADHD *want* to meet others’ (and our own) expectations and live with constant anxiety/shame/guilt over our frequent inability to do so. We’ve seen that trait in Walky in fact, during the whole “failing math” arc. Not being able to study/focus on something and failing to meet expectations as a result, and then emotionally twisting yourself in knots over that failure but STILL not being able to do any better, is a VERY ADHD trait.
I would imagine in this moment he is thinking “oh sh*t I should’ve read those emails/I forgot about those messages! I should’ve told Sal!” and just generally mentally berating himself. But will still once again manage to forget to check his messages/tell Sal the next time it happens, in spite of how he might feel about it.
Also for the record while it’s fair to say you should lower expectations of people with ADHD in situations that involve memory, being on time, studying uninteresting subjects etc. there ARE some things we often excel at: being calm in a crisis, for example…another trait we saw in Walky during the kidnapping. Or being a wealth of information on obscure subjects that happen to interest the person. Or being remarkably good at completing tasks at the last minute/under pressure or hyperfocusing on tasks that are very exciting.
So while people do need to temper some expectations when a person has did, I hate the idea that you should never expect much of someone like this in general. It isn’t actually a fair assessment.
Here’s a possible interpretation that could shine a positive light on Walky: he didn’t tell Sal because he assumed she wouldn’t be with him and he figured he could divert the parents away from her and save her the grief of even knowing they were around. It’s not a strong plan or a strong defense, but then again, it’s the sort of logic I could see Walky operating on
My assumptions:
1) didn’t realize it was this weekend
2) didn’t see whatever Linda sent him
3) straight up forgot bc ADHD
Either way no way he knew his parents were coming imminently. We know how anxious walky is about his mother, we would’ve seen him freaking out at least a bit
To be fair this is just happening in moments, and he’s not had time to react yet. There’s no way he knew that their parents had not texted Sal until now, and we’ve not seen how he reacts about Lucy yet.
Srsly so many comments here that remind me how many people don’t really understand ADHD. I know we haven’t been explicitly told that’s what he’s dealing with, but enough people have commented on how much he shows the signs of it.
If someone is generally a decent person who seems to care about the feelings of others and they sometimes inexplicably flake out like this by not telling someone something or not getting something important done, especially if they frequently seem easily distracted, have trouble completing tasks/homework/studying, etc. it is MUCH more likely that they have ADHD and literally just forgot or otherwise struggled to complete the task because of disorganization, rather than that they are just suddenly being an uncaring jerk towards someone they care about.
I don’t drink coffee, though.
What are the racial allegories for sweet tea, Pepsi, kool-aid, various kinds of fruit juices, fruit punch, and the occasional hot chocolate?
Given that hot chocolate mixes can be done with either hot water or hot milk the milk still works for that. And then I guess sugar for the sweet tea and kool-aid work as well if someone is insane and doesn’t use the required level of sugar to make them in the first place.
Back when I worked in a hotel restaurant kitchen, I would post butcher paper on the walls with a new question on it each day. I’d hang a marker next to it and invite the wait staff to use the marker to write their own answers to the question.
One of the day’s questions was: “I like my love like I like my coffee: (fill in the blank).”
Folks came up with some fun answers: sweet, hot, strong, creamy, covered in foam…
So Linda told Walky a dozen times they were coming and didn’t tell Sal once? Wow, I mean the hugging Joyce thing was already commented on a lot, but completely ignoring one of your offspring is also messed up.
I mean people probably didn’t comment on the ignoring Sal because it’s par for the course with her. It’s what she does. It would be like commenting on Joyce’s mother being a fundamentalist lunatic. We already knew that.
Oh no. I forgot that Linda was a thing when Walky and Lucy started being a prospective thing. She is almost certainly not going to be cool with Lucy dating her baby boy.
She is definitely going to be upset if she finds out about Lucy’s after 3rd date desires. I don’t think Walky or Lucy will outright tell her, but this is a comic and the chances that someone else mentions it is still a possibility. Possibly from Billie/Jennifer, as she is already annoyed with Walky.
They met on Freshman Family Weekend, when they together, yes. It was great, Linda entirely ignored Sal while she was in her boarding school uniform, offhandedly heard that Walky had a girlfriend, and then started shouting at him to set up a meeting/dinner.
He’s not negligent, he’s severely avoidant. The mere existence of his parents stresses him out so severely and completely, that every single time she messaged him, he completely shut down emotionally, and probably threw it across the room. “Avoiding anything related to difficult emotions” is Walky’s primary character trait, and his Mom is literally a narcissistic abuser. He’s a dick to Sal here, but I’m pretty damned understanding of him just not wanting to think about his Mom, or her love-bombing, or her voluntelling him that he’s entertaining them this weekend, or honestly having anything to do with her.
If anything, he maybe didn’t bother telling Sal about them coming, because he knows from repeated experience that Sal doesn’t care to be around them, and that they don’t care whether Sal’s around. Sal can get away with being aloof, or leaving, or whatever; they expect nothing from her. But Walky is Linda’s perfect golden child, who she projects all her false love onto, and that sucks for him because he’s actually still scared of the consequences of disappointing her.
Seconded. There’s a lot going on with that comment, but calling Linda a “narcissistic abuser” (which isn’t even a thing no matter how much the tiktok hivemind wants it to be) is just ignorant
Lest we all forget, he used to shut down completely and throw toys at Dorothy when he had a crush on her. She was really good for him, and he improved IMMENSELY with her
I dunno, it’s possible but I honestly think this is over-thinking the situation and I actually disagree with this read of his character. He shut down around Dorothy because 1-it was his first real crush and 2-he didn’t know wtf to do about the situation or how to interact with a girl he had feelings for because he’d never been in that situation before. And yeah when he is stressed about stuff and doesn’t know how to resolve it, he does tend to choose avoidance, but he doesn’t shut down completely, just tries to directly avoid the specific thing causing his anxiety while still obsessively thinking about it.
Until fairly recently he seemed to have a good relationship with his parents whereas the above super involved reaction would be more indicative of a lifetime of anxiety around their relationship. He has recently developed a fraught relationship with them (especially his mom) thanks to his discussions with Sal/revelations about their respective dynamics, but his past behavior suggests he tends to actively think about/fret about things that cause him anxiety even if he *wants* to ignore them.
I think also in light of his recently improved relationship with Sal and realizations about her struggles with their parents, he’d at least want to give her a heads up if he were actively thinking about the impending visit.
IMO it’s much more likely he didn’t even see/read the messages because he forgot to check his email or because his inbox is a chaotic mess or he did read them and then promptly forgot about their existence, because he really seems to have undiagnosed ADHD.
Also what day of the week is this? Even if it was Friday it would be weird to pop up at nine in the morning before class, but it gets even weirder if it not Friday. How far away do they even live from campus? Did they get up at five in the morning to drive there and try to catch them when they weren’t prepared? And ultimately what is Linda’s ulterior motive in all this?
Planning to show up early in the morning right before his class? That doesn’t make any sense unless she’s planning on disruption. Which she wouldn’t tell him.
Plus she just told Sal that she told him, so that all but disproves it.
Maybe Linda wants to drop some not so subtle hints to Walky that it would be a really wise choice to look into the medschool program for next term? She still doesn’t display any interest in her daugther and on parent day she was bragging to Dorothy’s mother that her son would be a medical student once he “recognized ” his real major.
It’s parents. Parents never end well in this comic. Low chance of supervillainy kidnapping and/or murder being involved with this particular pair of parents but it’s still unlikely to end well.
Oh fuck please tell me they won’t be here for two freaking days story time. I don’t have that kind of blood pressure.
Interesting Sal throws away her cigarette even though it’s legal for her to smoke and her mom is a smoker. And it’s good detail that Walky gets a hug but not Sal – though in Charles’ defence, Sal’s not really a hugging person unless it’s from Marcie. And, I’m assuming, Danny.
Seriously though, yes, Lucy and Sarah, run. It’s too late for Walky and Joyce.
Well, IU can’t make laws but it is forbidden to use tobacco products on University property, including University vehicles anywhere in the world. But Sal is one of those people who enjoy knowing how to break rules….
i’m sure it’ll switch between them and another story line (which, ironically would drag it out more lol)
@proxie even if it was , sal was doing a ‘good girl’ act in front of her parents briefly, not sure if she’s rly changed back to full ‘badass cool girl’
I’m guessing it’s a “choose your battles” decision and a “caught off her guard” decision. Sal likely doesn’t want to deliberately provoke her parents (i.e. her mom) and I doubt the “it’s legal” argument will fly in Linda Walkerton’s household.
Probably not, although it’s also true they aren’t in her household and Linda smokes too, but yeah, picking her battles. I was also wrong about it being legal for Sal, apparently the age has gone up.
It also just feels like something you don’t do in front of your parents, not while you’re still that young at least. Doubly when you’re already marked the bad child.
I’m almost 23 and i still feel awkward grabbing drinks at family events. I didn’t even wanna let my parents know I smoked weed until my cousin and aunt offered me a joint yesterday
More like a contrast. The Jacob situation was meeting someone would have supported the couple as long as it was they were both happy. Here we have someone not liking what she sees and trying to force a false couple together regardless of what they want. Joyce has no desire to please Linda so I could see it playing out as her saying no with Linda trying to play if off as “joking”
Yeah, Joyce is dating a Jew, I’m sure if she tells Linda that, Linda will rescind any belief that Joyce is a good person or a good influence on her son.
This is not even really worth rating, if you ask me. Like, I genuinely don’t know how much prep Sal or Walky could do that’d make Linda and Charles a non-shitty presence.
It’s not about the parents being less awful, it’s about giving the people like Sal and Lucy time to emotionally prepare for the impact. Especially when Walky not bothering to give either the heads up just makes it seem like he didn’t care about their feelings.
“Parents are visiting” is definitely on Walky’s “I don’t want to deal with this right now” pile. He may have made some progress regarding his relationship with Sal, but he’s still Walky. Avoidance is is modus operandi.
Yeah. Or, also entirely possible he *did* read them and then promptly forgot they existed. If he does indeed have ADHD as so many readers (myself included) suspect, it could be either one.
With ADHD sometimes reading a message about an upcoming event still doesn’t help because your brain will just not file the information in any sort of accessible way and it will essentially be like you never read it until someone/something reminds you and the memory of having read it finally returns.
I get why it seems that way but if he does indeed have ADHD, he deserves some benefit of the doubt. Not remembering to tell someone something important is not an indicator of lack of care for their feelings if the person has ADHD. It’s an indicator of a brain with insufficient executive functioning skills and poor memory.
It’s actually one of the most common and frustrating assumptions about people with ADHD that our apparent flakiness, forgetfulness, etc. is because we just don’t care.
Whether it’s caring about someone else’s feelings, caring about the importance of the task at hand, caring about personal success, etc. ADHD makes it hard to prioritize things even when not doing them results in consequences you’re really not okay with (such as hurting or angering someone you care about, failing a test, not accomplishing an important personal goal, etc).
This is also why shame is such an ineffective tool to motivate people with ADHD. Often people with ADHD already experience a ton of shame and guilt over our inability to focus or remember stuff, and external shame just makes us feel worse and causes things like depression and anxiety, but doesn’t actually resolve the issue or make it any more likely we’ll do better in the future.
Here’s an analogy: someone writes down lengthy instructions and emails them to you, but you are only allowed to glance at them for 1 second before the file deletes itself. You might remember some of the email, but you probably didn’t have time to read and commit to memory the entire thing, it’s even possible you only managed to see the subject line, which was vague and gave no indication of the contents.
Now imagine a few days later, the person asks you why you didn’t do the thing they asked you to do in the email? They sent you the instructions, so surely you should’ve read them and been able to do it? You protest that you were only able to access the email for 1 second, can’t read an entire lengthy email in 1 second, and don’t have a photographic memory, but this person is superhuman and *can* read and memorize an entire email in 1 second so they don’t understand why you couldn’t, and assume it must be because you just didn’t care about it, not understanding that you did try your best.
It’s not a perfect analogy, but that’s a bit what memory and trying to do future tasks is like when you have ADHD, trying to navigate a world designed around neurotypical expectations.
i imagine walky was prolly distracted by his breakfast group or so, or maybe got the ‘headsup’ from his parents while he was with lucy during their last date
Even assuming Linda is telling the truth (not something I’d bet on), why would Walky think he has to tell Sal?
He’s started to pick up on some things, but would probably still expect them to have contacted both of them. And they’re early. If he expected them over the weekend he may just not have told Sal yet.
Yeah nothing in the story indicates he intentionally didn’t tell Sal or didn’t care enough to tell her. People assuming that really need to better familiarize themselves with how ADHD brains work.
Ugh, poor Lucy. I’d love it if she stands up for herself against Linda. Even better if her golden son pushes back too, but I wouldn’t be surprised if Linda accuses Lucy of turning him against her.
I do feel like Walky will step up to bat, but honestly, part of me wouldn’t be surprised if Jennifer winds up doing it, too, since they treat her more like their daughter than they do Sal.
Or it could go another way. Walky could act the hero, state emphatically that Lucy is his girlfriend, and cement that relationship a little more. And Lucy falling in love with him that much more.
I don’t know about “worst case”, but I hope Sal doesn’t end up dropping Danny after finding out that Linda approves of him. (Alternately, I suppose Danny could end up telling Linda off, but I doubt he has that in him.)
I’m hoping Danny breaks expectations and shows some growth. He had an eye opening moment with Blaine one why you don’t always listen to someone’s who’s your elder but I can also see him disappointing sal by not standing with her and reverting to his passive people pleaser ways.
I don’t doubt him, we’ve seen him stand up for him and sal as a couple before, he’s got a shiny new spine since they started dating. Before that even, she’s a good influence on him. He might be worried about being respectful at first but i have no doubt he’s gonna be *pissed* when he sees how sal’s parents treat her. Maybe moreso if he notices them/Linda treating him better than Lucy
Danny will say Linda’s name coldly, and Linda will respond by talking about Sal’s vulva, that Danny should think about having sex with her when he’s having sex with Sal, and then say, “Look, it’s cool Dan-O” as if she hadn’t the one being uncool.
I’m not sure Charles is nicer, but he is a lot quieter. I feel I really don’t know anything about him. If I had to guess, I’d guess his position is: keep your head down and smile a lot, don’t wanna cause strife in the family.
He’s passive. An enabler. He’ll never acknowledge his wife’s abuse and controlling behavior towards their kids. He’s gonna get cut off when sal and walky are financially independent right along side linda
Yeah, it’s fair to blame Walky for not giving Sal a heads up, considering their circumstances, but focusing on that ignores the deeper problem that is how those parents treat her.
I get the impression that Charles wants to spend more time with Sal. He knows she doesn’t want that though and he doesn’t get why. So him knowing Sal better might be why he didn’t text her.
Assuming of course that they even have her number. Walky didn’t when he first got to university and I wouldn’t be shocked Sal doesn’t want her parents to be able to contact her at all times.
My impression was that Charles let’s his wife make all the decisions to the point where you have to directly ask him to do something Linda didn’t suggest before he will even consider breaking the routine and Sal isn’t going to ask because she has already been disappointed and hurt and isn’t in a rush to repeat the experience.
I think Charles tends to agree with Linda more often than not, but unlike Linda I think he feels guilty when it alienates his daughter, because he DOES want her to have a good relationship with him.
Meanwhile I think Linda’s written her off as a lost cause. A lost cause who needs to listen to her more but well, if she did that she wouldn’t be lost, now would she?
So far we haven’t seen Charles disagree with Linda period. He shows no acknowledgement that Sal has been alienated. He might want to have a relationship with his daugther but he doesn’t try at all to make it happen. When Sal told him she could not spend time on parents day because of a hair appointment he didn’t even try to say they would really like her company if she could reschedule? In my opinion Charles doesn’t deserve any benefit of the doubt until he’s seen to actually try to show care beyond a standard greeting.
Yeah, he might be confused about Sal not wanting to be around them (seriously, how though) but I’m not sure he feels guilt; it’s not clear that he even realizes he’s doing something wrong.
The reason I think he sometimes feels guilty is the face he makes when Sal says she hates her mother back when Linda stole her money.
Now, does this guilt mean he’s gonna say or do fuck all to actually fix things? Of course he’s not. Maybe ‘upsets his daughter’ is better phrasing, but Charles isn’t 100% oblivious about some things.
I just don’t think he realizes this is why Sal makes hours long hair appointments when they visit and still goes ‘Awww, now?’
It’s called a “narcissistic accessory,” and they make great partners for narcissists, because of their complete lack of a spine, and general enabling behavior. Generally, it’s somebody so insecure, they’re willing to put up with nearly anything, just to believe that one person loves them. Even better if their narcissist actually unloads most of their abuse and toxic expectations on somebody else nearby, and not them!
You should. People with personality disorders are far more likely to be victims of abuse and experience homelessness at much higher rates. Careless applications of narcissism to everyone we don’t like is part of the ableist demonization of cluster B mental disorders that leaves people without means of support or rehabilitation.
Do better.
College partners can cause a crisis with parents (if they don’t like them): It’s just old enough for them to start getting concerned that the partner is serious enough to stay around FOREVER, but young enough for them to think that if they express disapproval, they still have enough influence to force a break-up. Having a “better” partner can absolutely sky-rocket a sibling to “favorite” status, although it usually takes longer than the general speed that DOA moves at—it’s noticeable, but not immediate.
That said, I also think “golden child” status is immutable, even if another child might be the “favorite” at different times. The golden child will always be the golden child, even if the other one hangs out with the parents more. Kind of like a woman and man on the same level in a male-dominated, sexist workplace; even if the woman consistently performs better, the male counterpart will always be the man.
I’m sure it happens with college partners, but from what I know about parents like Linda, once you lose their esteem, it’s gone. I don’t think anything Sal does could possibly rocket her back up the ranks. It can for other kinds of parents, but with these two, they’ve already decided Sal is the ‘bad child’ who ‘makes them look like bad parents’ by smoking and dressing in a way they don’t approve and hanging out with people they don’t like and the criminal record, etc.
On the other hand, if there’s one thing I don’t associate DOA villains with, it’s their subtlety. I wouldn’t be surprised if the OP is at least half-right.
I think it will be less that Linda would be especially pleased by Danny, exactly, and more that Linda has likely no real expectations of Sal. She will likely be surprised, but if anyone’s their favorite, it’ll maybe be Jennifer, someone they already treat as more their child than they do Sal.
I mean, the Walkerton parents, like most of Jennifer’s friend group, only really “like” her, because of her direct association with her powerful parents. Narcissists fully evaluate most people by how directly useful their connections are.
Yeah. I could be wrong but I get the impression this is a scenario where it doesn’t matter what Sal does, she’ll still struggle to win her mother’s approval.
I predicted this literally months ago. Sal is dating a nice, kindly white guy. She’s the new kid with a good head on her shoulders, because the only things that Linda actually wants from her kids are more white babies.
This strip honestly does a lot to highlight how well-planned and written DoA is. Think about it. This punchline essentially requires the presence of these particular girls, that if it was just Lucy, one could chalk it up to Linda singling out Joyce just by coin toss. But no, it being Lucy, Sarah, and Joyce, and it’s just the white girl? That’s much dicier.
But, where the good planning shows is that this group makeup is all plausibly together because of circumstances set up by the Raidah breakfast months ago. Lucy and Sarah had interacted some prior, sure, but not a hell of a lot, but now there is the underlying tension that was already taking place when the Walkertons dropped in and made made everyone super uncomfortable on top of it.
Additionally, this does feel like it’s going to pay off how, since Walky was on-panel with his parents last, a whole lot of shit has happened. His comment that his mom was going to be pissed he was dating a black girl to Lucy, boy is that being paid off now.
As much as I dislike Linda her appearance as one positive effect, unity in the comments. People stop (to me seemingly too intense) discussions which other character is wrong or more wrong and unite in their dislike for Linda. Nothing unites like a vile enemy.
Easy enough mistake for Linda to make, I guess. What was it Lucy called Joyce? “White bisexual me”?
Yes. I’m being a little sarcastic in letting Linda off the hook for racism. If all she knows is that Walky has a new ladyfriend it’s pretty icky for her to assume that of three women in the group only the White one is eligible.
plot twist: somehow joe and lucy end up breaking up with them and they get together anyways, fated to be together no matter which iteration whether they want to or not /shot XD
Well i doubt it but it is amusing how vehement the both of them would be against it here/now
Honestly, way back at the beginning of the series i was kind of assuming the whole thing was still going to end with the two of them getting together. Even when Walky was with Dorothy and that seemed so permanent, i was working on the assumption that Joyce and Walky were the destined couple.
Nowadays i’m not so sure which way it’ll go. I could see Willis playing the long game and still getting them together even with all the new relationships between them. Or it’ll just flat out not happen. Time will tell.
I could see it happening but if it did then it’ll be far off. There’s only been like one hint that there’s any attraction between the two but it’s still there.
Even though I started with It’s Walky back in the day, I just cannot see the 2 of them together in this universe at all. Their chemistry feels totally different.
Exactly who’s paying for this phone? Has Sal been employed this whole time? Because if not, my guess is that the parents are paying for the phone, just like they’re paying for college, and even good parents are unlikely to pay for their child to have a phone line and not tell them the number.
Not sure. We know Sal had the money to pay for a new motorcycle (it’s probably not used, she got the jacket that came with it) and the accompanying insurance and upkeep until this winter, so she had a job at some point and apparently had quite a bit saved. Maybe when the money got low, she chose her phone over the bike.
So if Sal bought her phone she may not have given them the number. Though even if they did, yeah, they wouldn’t actually care enough to call her so what difference does it make?
Oh, that wasn’t a defence for Linda, that was me going ‘Sal might not want to give them her number and I can’t blame her’. There’s no excuse for them not to try to contact Sal.
Speaking as someone with treated ADHD, even if I’ve been told something a dozen times when it happens there is a non-zero chance that my brain would have filed it under not-relevant-yet-so-forget. Walky doesn’t even have methylphenidate to help him
In my case, I know my parents would tell all the siblings. In this case, it’s depressingly inevitable that they don’t tell Sal
In my entire school years I don’t think I told my parents about more than like… a quarter of all parent-teacher meetings we’d been told about and instructed to write down. Stuff you aren’t interested in just flees the brain as soon as it enters it.
Right? I’m so grateful my school sent important info home in paper format and my mom always had the good sense to check my backpack/folders.
Now that I’M the mom, I keep forgetting to check my kid’s backpack every day…but thank goodness they have apps for parents now where they post stuff (and my own kid is much better at remembering to tell me about stuff).
I can’t tell if ADHD meds have actually improved my memory at all, it’s still atrocious. What they *have* done is given me the mental clarity and self-awareness to realize I need to write everything down immediately so I don’t forget (and usually at least enough memory to do that…usually…)
Also your “filed under not relevant yet so forget” comment made me think: it’s a lot like memory is a bunch of boxes, with immediate events closest and future events lined up further away the farther they are in the future.
And when NT people are told about a future event, their brain walks over to the correct future date box and puts the info in. But with ADHD, it’s like our brain is stuck in the chair next to the “now” box. It refuses to get up or can’t get up so it just tosses the thought in the general direction of the future box, but the further away it is, the more likely it is to miss the box and be lost forever.
as far as I am aware, Sal’s short-term plans primarily include finding a spontaneous moment to bang her boyfriend. She was already flustered about it because this is the first time she’s had an emotionally meaningful relationship with a suitor who brings her flowers and serenades her on his ukulele and doesn’t buy into her ‘bad girl’ image/reputation, so the timing couldn’t be worse.
BOY this is going to be mighty interesting when Linda realizes who Joyce is. Will she lose her shit at Walky for dating the girl whose church got them kidnapped? Will we find out if she ever sued them? Will her shock be worse when she finds out her son’s new gf is Black? Only good things can happen from here
Dorothy going to Walky’s room to formally apologize, and seeing or hearing his parents. Wanting to hide, she ducks into the next room with an open door. It’s Arnold and Ken’s room. Arnold’s home, and talking to someone who doesn’t have an image of her as never making mistakes or never struggling is a great comfort. …
Who’s ready for Linda to point to her husband when accused of being racist here?
And then we get the unfortunate realization… Linda Walkerton 25 years ago? Probably not a bigot. Today? Yeah, she went further “right” as she got older, she just is loathe to admit it.
She ain’t the only boomer that used to have (what were once considered) “progressive views” to grow into shit as they age.
But my bigotry here is okay cause it’s only Ageist and not racist or creedist or x-phobic.
And will stay that way for another 10 years until the progressive half of Gen X realizes they don’t want to be represented by the Joe Rogan crowd.
My understanding is people usually don’t change to get more conservative as they get older. The definition of liberal and conservative changes and the line moves faster than the individual.
I suspect this adage is the result of 2 different things:
I think some people actively shift further right as they get older while for others, it’s just that as *society* becomes more progressive, views that used to be considered radically progressive become the bare minimum of leftist ideology.
“Progressive for 1980” is a much lower bar than “progressive in 2023” and if a person’s views stagnate rather than becoming more progressive with the times, suddenly they may find they don’t see eye-to-eye with modern-day progressives.
As for the former group, I wonder if that has a lot to do with relative struggle vs. comfort. In the US, until fairly recently, each subsequent generation would end up with more wealth and success than their parents. So if we assume that struggle often makes people more inclined to be progressive (since they’re more directly aware of and impacted by societal inequalities) and security/wealth often makes people more conservative (because they’re less directly impacted by societal inequalities, and may in fact benefit from them, such as lower taxes for the wealthy) I can see how previous generations (such as boomers and at least half of gen x) might become more conservative with age.
Millennials are the first generation in recent history to earn less than their parents. When you’re still struggling financially at 30 (or know enough people who are) and things like financial security and retirement aren’t guarantees even when you are currently financially stable, a person is probably more likely to still pay attention to societal inequality and less likely to vote for things that benefit those with the most privilege at the cost of those with less.
Basically that’s my theory anyway on why that adage exists and why so many in more recent gens (such as millennial and younger) find it doesn’t fit them at all.
Plus millennials and younger gen x are also the first gen to be super comfortable with the internet, and use it way more than our parents do, and the internet has a way of increasing awareness about societal issues since we see more of what various other groups we may not belong to are going through.
Whereas older less internet savvy people are probably more likely to spend their days in echo-chambers of people who are close to their age and have similar circumstances. (Obviously echo chambers can form online too, but you’re still more likely to be exposed to people from different groups/backgrounds/ages on an equal playing field online than in person.
“Years ago my mother used to say to me, she’d say, “In this world, Elwood, you must be” – she always called me Elwood – “In this world, Elwood, you must be oh so smart or oh so pleasant.” Well, for years I was smart. I recommend pleasant. You may quote me. “
Then if Willis adds more default Gravatars (like Charlie was added recently), the defaults are randomized and you get to find your favorite all over again!
Zeroed in on the white girl as her son’s significant other AND didn’t tell Sal they were coming, only told David. Incredible parenting going on around here.
One chapter = one day. There’s been no time skips, but “this was halloween” was mostly flashback where the present-time strips look place during the end of the chapter before.
Liz first showed up on a Friday (Sister, Christian).
Right now, they (minus Sarah) are headed to math, a MWF class.
in linda’s defense, walky’s last two girlfriends (well, girlfriend and unlabeled “might have gone somewhere if not for a trauma conga implosion” fwb type situation) had been white girls with glasses. i dont remember if he’s told her anything about either of them, but if i were her i’d definitely assume he has a type and was seeing another white girl with glasses based on that. not that there isn’t likely a racial bias happening here, narratively.
I was actually gonna say the same thing but also yeah shes definitely assuming white girl with glasses instead of black girl with glasses not just cause she assumes walky’s type but also her own preferences in a future daughter in law.
Is it just me or is “David’s whispering to someone? Clearly it must be his girlfriend, so I should single out the most likely one out of the three candidates and lavish her with my affections with no further questions” a real weird line of reasoning even beyond the racism?
Probably because she just assumed this was a house call/one day visit. Maybe a luncheon, chitty chat, then say bye. Weekend means at least two full days of rubbing elbows with her parents.
aw, man. upsettingly, patreon post blurring is a lot clearer now. checking out the posts beforehand is now a matter of ‘i can see most of the strip’, instead of ‘fun guessing game’
Oxford English dictionary defines a day of the week other than Saturday or Sunday to be wekday. Or to quote dictionary.com “What is a weekday? A weekday is any day that is not a weekend day. Since the weekend is considered to consist of Saturday and Sunday, the weekdays are Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday.”
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good job darting for the whitest person there, Mother Racist McRaceface
Joyce: *hurls backpack at Linda, screams bloody murder*
I mean, isn’t Joyce the /only/ white female that Walky could be whispering to, and is in the immediate vicinity?
Yes. With 3 choices, and the *obvious* one being the person who responded to Walky’s whisper to run, Linda the Racist chose the only white girl there.
I’m not entirely convinced of the racist part, but I am admittedly an extreme skeptic about nearly everything. I mean… it’s probably true, but all we have to go on is Sal’s extremely biased account of her childhood, and Linda did marry a black man so… I’m curious to hear what Linda has to say for herself.
Why is it biased? Like… just because it’s her own opinion of her own life?
That’s exactly what I’m saying. Even the most fair-minded person has her biases, and Sal isn’t exactly fair-minded. I just get the feeling there is more to Sal’s childhood than Sal is willing or able to see. Her mom may not be the super-villain she imagines – only a flawed and imperfect person like everybody else. But, I may be wrong.
You’d be surprised how many racist people marry black people. Racism takes more forms than hurling slurs and actively preaching hate. It’s oftentimes far more subtle.
Just look at Ginny Thomas for example.
Linda is probably definitely not racist in her own view of herself. She is, after all, fine with black people as long as they fit into the box she has assigned them. That box is informed by colorism, sexism, ableism, and respectability politics. And she isn’t a horrible person! On a surface level encounter she probably comes across as just FINE. It is just when you are around her longer that the more corrosive elements of her prejudices seep out.
Exactly. You’ve got your outright “I hate these people and don’t want them anywhere near me” bigots, but bigotry can also come in other, less blatantly obvious (to others outside the group) forms.
In fact I’d argue the most common forms of bigotry are the more subtle ones because they’re much more insidious. They’re easier to overlook and more tolerable to society which allows those kinds of views to gain a foothold and spread.
One super common type is the condescending/paternalistic variety where the person would never consider themselves bigoted because they (according to them) certainly don’t think *untrue* negative things about said group and have “black/disabled/female/gay/etc” friends! Their bigotry tends to take the form of “affectionate” superiority. They will tolerate or even befriend/marry/adopt members of the marginalized group, but still look down on the group as a whole, and may consider themselves a Really Good Person for “elevating” members of that group by associating with/“helping” them.
Some good examples of this type of bigotry are: white saviorism, “disability parents” (parents of disabled or ND kids who are ironically often ableist despite viewing themselves as disability advocates), the whole “love the sinner, hate the sin” thing (Christians who swear they don’t hate you, they’re just trying to save you because they care! They’re judging your entire identity as Wrong out of love!), and the entire incel movement (men who put women up on a pedestal, but in a super objectifying/dehumanizing way, while simultaneously being incredibly hostile towards them).
They often will view select members of the group as better than the rest because they have “overcome” the group’s perceived inferiorities or are the “right kind” of that type of person. Often then”right kind” is a marginalized person who experiences internalized or lateral bigotry and does their best to conform to the standards of the privileged or hide/downplay their own identity while looking down on those who don’t, basically tolerating or even agreeing with the bigotry towards their own group.
There’s something of a symbiotic relationship between paternalistic bigots and marginalized people with internalized bigotry. The latter gains a tiny taste of privilege by gaining some approval from the bigots in power (though never as much as the privileged group and it comes at the expense of other marginalized people) while the former gets to point to that person as an example of why they’re not actually bigoted/why their bigotry is correct
(Leading to classics such as: “I can’t be racist, I have a black friend/husband/daughter!” “well my disabled friend said it’s okay to accuse people of faking if they don’t look disabled” “my gay friend agrees with me that gay people should be more subtle in public” “my wife doesn’t like feminism and agrees that women are no longer oppressed and just complain too much”)
or even use a loved one’s marginalization as a shield or to get attention/victimize themselves (such as abled parents with a disabled child or white parents with a non-white child who use their kid as a prop while centering themselves/their struggles or painting themselves the savior)
Linda may not be the extremely obvious, mustache twirling, “purify society” kind of racist, but she is most likely the other type of racist, and probably considers her husband the “right kind” of black man because he manages to avoid matching certain stereotypes/manages to be the “ideal minority”. We haven’t got a lot of insight into Charles yet but it’s probably a safe assumption that he holds at least some internalized racism, based on his comment about Sal’s hair, and the fact that he either agrees with or at least tolerates Linda’s treatment of Sal and comments about Marcie (since he never seems to object to it).
I imagine Linda likely holds Charles (and their kids) to an excessively high standard and Charles and Walky (at least as far as she knows) have managed to meet her expectations, while Sal hasn’t. In her mind, her attitude towards Sal isn’t racism (and she’d likely be extremely offended by the suggestion that it is)* to her, it’s probably a resentment that she feels Sal has squandered/doesn’t appreciate the “opportunities” she’s been given (via her proximity to Linda’s whiteness and her dad’s efforts to be a model minority). In Linda’s mind, every mistake Sal makes is her carelessly taking that “gift” for granted and confirming negative racial stereotypes.
*Obviously it IS racism, just explaining how someone like Linda would probably see themselves and the mental gymnastics involved in a racist marrying a black person.
(Omg sorry this got so long, sometimes I type too much in an effort to explain things thoroughly)
Her mother stole money with the express purpose of preventing a child from receiving medical care after being violently attacked.
A non-white, heavily-implied-to-be-undocumented child. Just, you know. To add to the metaphorical moustache-twirling your point is about.
But it’s okay because she took it from her own child! /s
…I’ve missed SOMETHING, anyone have a link for context?
Here you go https://www.dumbingofage.com/2018/comic/book-9-comic/01-flyin-to-the-red/injury/
The specific moment:
https://www.dumbingofage.com/2018/comic/book-9-comic/01-flyin-to-the-red/influences/
https://www.dumbingofage.com/2018/comic/book-9-comic/01-flyin-to-the-red/losses/
She may simply, on a gut level, not think of her husband as “Black”. There are indeed racists who have exceptions for individual Black people who are kind of “honorary white people” to them.
“Black skin, white mask”
“one of the good ones”
Look into Dunbar’s Number for an interesting insight to this conundrum. Robin Dunbar is an anthropologist who noticed a pattern in medieval villages, factory workers, and any other group of humans: you can only closely know between 150 and 300 people. All the rest get categorized under biases.
To closely know someone means you’re current with their life and they’re current with your life. So I might be current with details of a celebrity’s life, but they aren’t close because they have no clue who I am. Those medieval villages averaged around 200 people, the theory goes, because once you have enough for two groups of 150, there’s the strong likelihood of forming an us-vs-them mentality and having one group vote themselves off the island. Taken to the extreme, you end up with groups like Joyce’s former congregation or the 1% whose position insulates them from getting accurate views of other people.
Long intro, but Walky’s Mom is obviously close with her husband. She knows him, and he knows her. But that’s not enough to change the pattern of “White people good, Black people uncertain if not dangerous” drilled into her brain during a racist upbringing.
See also “monkeysphere”. Every(?) primate species has such a number.
And as we all know, it’s impossible to marry someone you’re bigoted against. Which is why misogynists never have wives!
And this isn’t aimed at you specifically, but it’s getting weird how many people in the comments are trying really hard to see Linda as anything but racist again. I’m seeing a lot more ‘It’s sexism/Sal’s just the older twin/It’s Sal’s behaviour/Sal’s misunderstanding/Walky’s just more ‘manageable’/etc.’ than was the case a few years ago.
Whoops! I accidentally flagged your post. Sorry! It was a mistake. I meant to hit “reply”. Anyways, these are all good points.
I’m worried I come across as apologetic when I talk about her, I think I have a slightly more charitable take on her than most, but even the most charitable take possible with her with is still a really unpleasant person who’s been a bad parent to both her children and was unquestionably racist towards her daughter’s best friend.
I think some of us are working to keep judgment suspended until we have enough facts (as opposed to emotionally-laden reports of things we haven’t seen) to make a precise judgment rather than a sweeping approximate one. What particular species of horrible person, if you will, so that we can despise that which is despicable and endorse that which is endorsable. Nobody is 100% bad.
That may well be, but then I wonder what kind of ‘facts’ they’re waiting for and, on a narrative level, why they think it’d be a good idea for the answer to be ‘actually the racism is all in the black woman’s head and it’s a big misunderstanding’.
If I’m gonna destroy the underpinnings of someone’s worldview, I need to understand the superstructure in detail so I know where to place the charges, or I mayn’t cut the right members and the structure won’t collapse. Good enough?
I get that and I can respect wanting to know what specific ‘flavour’ of awful you’re dealing with, but yeah, the reluctance to have racism as a key part of that superstructure and insisting it must actually be something else is grating. Especially when that would result in, as Willis put it, a storyline where it turns out the racism is in the black woman’s head all along.
Yeah, it’s important to remember that as fiction, there are ways to telegraph to the readers what conclusions we are supposed to draw.
As someone with progressive views, Willis is unlikely to be writing a story where a black woman’s perceived experience of racism is actually all in her head. Because that would be a pretty awful message given how often marginalized people are told they’re overreacting/reading too much into things when they try to point out micro aggressions and other forms of bigotry.
And as others have said, it’s generally good practice, even IRL when you don’t have all the facts, to not repeatedly insist the marginalized person may be mistaken. My policy if I’m not sure is to avoid commenting on the situation as the last thing a victim of bigotry needs is more people telling them they might be wrong about what they’ve experienced.
And while it’s not a real human being told they’re wrong about what they experienced here, the constant repeating of that sentiment even about a fictional character’s experiences echoes all the many times victims of bigotry experience that kind of doubt or gaslighting IRL.
I don’t think the “Misogynists have wives” is really a good analogy. Sexism is all about women properly fitting into their “proper” role as sex objects, wives or mothers. Misogynists want wives, but they want them properly controlled and limited.
There’s no real parallel there for racists marrying. If there’s any kind of a parallel, it would be more like a racist having black servants – as was so common back in the day.
The fetishization and objectification of black men by white women is a massive thing though. I don’t think I’d go as far as to say it’s the same, society is still patriarchal etc etc but the point still stands that just because you marry someone doesn’t mean you don’t dehumanize them. My theory? Linda thinks Charles is “one of the good ones”, he’s not even black i mean not really. He’s half white himself, he’s different from those uncivilized brutes. All that plus probably a little classic racist fetishization. And a sense of ownership given they have a sort of “yes dear…” “Go ask your mother” type of relationship
All subconscious of course. Because Linda’s good people, of course she’d never think of her dear husband like that
All good points. It’s just that specific analogy I don’t like precisely because for sexism has so long been precisely about dehumanizing women and marrying them.
It’s not a perfect analogy, but the point is it is possible to marry someone you’re bigoted against. If it doesn’t work for you, swap it for homophobic women with gay friends, ableist assholes with disabled partners, etc.
I dunno, while obviously no one type of bigotry is precisely the same as another, and individual scenarios may manifest in different ways, I think it’s a pretty reasonable analogy. And I say this as a woman.
All forms of bigotry have some element of feeling that members of that group have a “proper place” (a place that is in some way inferior to the person of privilege). Racists still want people of other races to behave in certain ways, fill certain roles, “know their place in society”, etc. whether that place is “not a member of society at all” or “part of society but a less important/less respected part than me” or “part of society as long as they conform to my precise expectations of who they should be/how they should look or act.”
So I guess I don’t really get the objection to the analogy. Like BBCC said, swap in any other group, ultimately the point is having affection for someone doesn’t mean you can’t judge them unfairly or have bigoted feelings about a marginalized group they are part of, even if the exact way the dynamic manifests isn’t identical.
I would argue that it doesn’t even necessarily matter if Sal is right or not that racism made her the unfavorite. Whether or not that was the initial cause, the effect was still the same. Walky got preferential treatment and Sal got constantly treated as not good enough.
(Personally, I suspect it was a combo of subconscious racial bias + sexism that Sal got hit with. And Linda would probably only ever be able to realize the sexism, if she did a WHOLE lot of soul-searching.)
Well that was eye-rolling.
She may have an issue with dark-skinned women specifically – also, there was a VERY boundary-crossing MadTV skit called “Inside Looking Out”, in which Jordan Peele played a black man in a relationship with an EXTREMELY racist white woman (played by Nicole Parker).
You can overcome a bias. I’m not saying you can become unbaised, although that is also true. You can, conditionally, overcome a bias, on a case-by-case basis. It happens all the time.
David Walkerton came out whiter
The “run” may have started out as a whisper, but by the time he repeats it and Sarah responds, it’s pretty openly out there.
Kind of impressive of Walky to tell his friends to run, right in front of his parents.
Eh, they’d take it as the traditional “Our boy is just worried we’ll embarrass him in front of his little friends!”
I always kind of thought it was more likely she was sexist rather than racist. Promoting the son rather than the daughter is common with individuals who have internalized sexism.
Of course, it’s fully possible that she’s awful in more than one way–sexism and racism are hardly incongruent.
But I think there’s plenty of clear evidence of racism in the things we’ve seen portrayed in the strip. The way she discusses Marcie makes it clear that race-bias is part of her worldview, so at that point, it becomes pretty clear that Sal’s right about it also factoring into their relationship.
Por que no los dos?
I mean it’s been pretty explicitly indicated and stated in-comic that Linda is racist. Sal pointed it out to Walky who, upon reflection, now agrees with that interpretation.
And while Sal’s assumption could be mistaken, there have been enough context clues/microaggressions to suggest she isn’t. Also it just wouldn’t make sense narratively for Willis to plant that kind of red herring, make readers think this is an important story about racism, and then go “just kidding she’s actually sexist!”
Though I do agree it’s entirely possible it’s both! It seems rare for someone who expresses some kind of bigotry to *only* be bigoted about one single group. Like ants, if you see signs of one kind of bigotry, odds are a few more are lurking nearby!
Linda is not technically as bad a parent as Blaine and Ross, but by god is she working hard on narrowing that gap.
She’s never going to be as bad because I frankly don’t think she’s got attempted murder and supervillain costumes in her, but most parents that suck don’t either so she can still feel pretty awful
If we’re measuring harm by how physically damaged their children are, Sal’s got permanent damage to her hand and Marcie can’t speak anymore.
I think how directly you caused that harm is a pretty important thing to consider. Linda managed to badly mess up both of her kids, but in an ‘evil parents’ scale she falls well short of trying to murder people.
Yeah, while I do not know what the experience of being a biracial kid with a racist parent is like, just reflecting on whether I’d rather have an ableist/sexist parent as a disabled woman or a parent who orchestrates a kidnapping/tries to *kill* me to “save” me from myself, if I were forced to choose one of those two, I’d definitely prefer the ableist/sexist parent.
It would still be awful and damaging obviously, but Blaine and Ross are on a whole extra level of trauma-inducing (plus bonus splash zone trauma inflicted on everyone around their kids!). 😬
I never quite understood why Sal or Walky didn’t (or couldn’t) ask Billie to help with Marcie’s surgery? Seems Billie’s family had the money, and even at that age, she might have been able to work her parents for it.
It’s uh, probably not a coincidence that the Billingsworth parents have never shown up even in flashback.
i get the feeling wouldn’t have been very beneficial to marcie or her family
oh HELL yeah baby i’ll take a becky icon
I’m so jealous you have becky!! I’m gonna shoot my shot, before changing this email i was Ruth… come on joyce, becky, or dina!! or Carla cuz trans girls are always awesome even when they’re insufferable trolls with a heart
OH GOD NO! Danny reminds me way too much of the man i killed to become who i am today.
Yeaaaaaahhhhh, I’m guessing the only thing her dad would do is call immigration.
Oh my god I’d forgotten that strip. Sal’s face…
Walky probably didn’t care enough at the time, and if Sal had asked Billie/Jennifer I imagine that Linda would have found out about it. She already took Sal’s money so she couldn’t help, I imagine she would have been upset that Sal was trying to “waste someone else’s money on someone of no value.”
Sal probably got some 20s out of Jennifer for it, but not directly from her parents.
She may not be as bad as those two, but that’s a very low bar to clear. She wanted to get Amber kicked out of school because her father kidnapped her baby boy, despite the fact that he also kidnapped her and the whole purpose for doing so was to force her out of school so he did not have to pay for her to attend said college.
That’s right, she wanted her son’s kidnapper to get his way. The kicker was that was the girl that Walky was more or less dating at the time.
She also never paid the bail for a murder, which is an example of just how hard you’d have to work to be the worst parent in the strip.
Not that it’ll stop her from trying.
Parental Abuse Georgs (inexplicably plural) were an outlier adn should not be counted.
The real question is, where does she rank compared to Carol?
They’re different varieties of horrible, but to a roughly equal degree.
Linda tends to be less overt when other people are around. She’s insidious.
RUUUN
Oh my god. This is not the microaggression I was anticipating, Linda zeroing in on the white girl as being David’s significant other, but in retrospect, boy is it not surprising.
Ugh.
The sick feeling in my stomach is not ENTIRELY from the pound of carrot jerky I just ate.
(Everyone… SLICE your carrots before dehydrating them, or they turn into chewing gum!)
Where were you with this wisdom, like, a month ago? At least the dog liked it, I guess.
Did. Did you guys dehydrate entire carrots???
Ayup. At least Rex Vivat had the good sense to share it with a dog! I just swallowed hard and chewed up the WHOLE thing. Ugggghhhh…. so sick….
That part about “it definitely being” Joyce makes me think Linda did see who Walky was really whispering to but wants him to pretend otherwise to please her.
The “most definitely” didn’t give it away?
Literally the exact second Walky was dating Lucy, this was destiny.
This is going to be one of those storylines, huh. Guess it has been a while
Nice PhP Majungasaurus pfp
“and by this storyline, i mean one where i get flippin humiliated by a bunch of flippin simosuchi =C”
all of these references are going to be very confusing once I change my avatar
Confusing to whom? What’s the scenario here
Eh, when I read the archives of a comic I’ll sometimes check the comments section of pages I think might have gotten interesting reactions, and I figure I’m not the only one
And here, we, go….Just tell Linda she’s Joyce, the daughter of the lady she got into a screaming Mach with that’ll scare her off.
But come one Joyce x Walky is so “Been there done that” we have an entire AU for that alone.
Linda would 100000% choose the person most directly responsible for the kidnapping instead of the victim.
Wait but the people are responsible for the kidnapping are dead now, except for Joyce’s mom?
Also, she’s just being a racist here, I don’t think it has to do with the kidnapping.
….. that was a thousand times worded wrongly, and I blame my surgery meds.
What I meant was that, out of the three main targets of the kidnapping (Joyce, Amber, Becky), Amber’s dad would not go to a school with a gun in the middle of the day. The attack on Amber the night before was done at night. Joyce’s church was 1000% the instigator in blatantly attacking the kids. Linda’s response, when she found out who Blaine was, was to try to get Amber punished.
Linda would totes magoats bow to the will of the church over some random sicko.
Yeah, being one hundred thousand percent sure is a degree of confidence that often requires being drugged. That tracks. Hope your recovery is fast!
=/
At this point I think Willis’ long-term goal in this series is for Joyce and Walky to date or at least have some sort of romantic thing with every single character in the cast that it would even somewhat make sense for them to date in this universe *except* each other.
Hey, I’m still holding out hope!
…wow. Honestly I hope Lucy stays and trip and somehow decks her in the face.
(seriously tho, she immediately headed to the white girl because of course.)
well joyce and walky were together in an alternate timeline/universe lol.
I was thinking Walky had taken Joyce to meet his parents, but you’re right, different comic.
Fucking RUN.
*plays “Danger Draws Near” from JoJo StarDust Crusaders OST*
Oh fuck no.
Ah. Yeah, I probably should have expected the “just completely ignore Lucy” tactic on Linda’s part. sigh
Linda isn’t racist, she’s just a big fan of the Walkyverse. As she should be, honestly.
She’s gonna be so sad when she finds out what happened to Mike, from her favorite comic, Shortpacked.
Linda’s fridge is adorned with that one It’s Walky! strip where Mike says that Sal’s new hairstyle really brings out her “huge– oh Christ no, joke aborted
Sarcasm?
Yeah, I’m assuming so.
Yep, sarcasm.
Wrong Continuity, Linda
See that is the thing about Linda, she doesn’t really belong to any continuity. Much like our lord Cthulhu, she just should not be.
Missed it by oooooone universe
Wow, Walky.
I love you.
I often support you in the comments.
But you let not only Sal, but also Lucy be blindsided by Linda?
I’m not mad.
I’m just disappointed (Sal’s mad).
I mean I don’t think this is the weekend.
This should be Friday, so it’s the weekend.
I am intrigued by your calendrical innovations and wish to subscribe my employer to your newsletter.
Well, Don’t Stop Billie-ving (and the non flash back parts of This Was Halloween) was a Monday, so with one storyline per day, it is Friday.
Actually, I may need to correct myself; this might be Thursday.
In which case it would be a long weekend.
I was trying to figure it out,
and going by Lucy’s clothes,
the date of the comic competition (not the right word, but I’m tired) which I believe was a Friday,
then a jump to Sunday (we see Lucy leaving church with Becky and Sierra),
then more outfit changes up til she asks Sal about a double date where she also mentions it’s been 8 days of dating Walky,
and today is the next day.
Walky asked her out to dinner the night he got hot.
If Lucy is counting nights and days separately when she says it’s been 8 days, then that would be 8 nights and 8 mornings, Thursday morning, and today would be Friday morning.
If she counts the nights and days the same, then day 8 was Wednesday, etc.
That said, I’ve been working under the assumption that the day of the comic competition was Friday, two mornings after the first dinner date, mainly because I remember it being for Friday and they also had class that day (my school didn’t have classes on the weekend).
If the competition was actually on Saturday, then there was no skipped day between it and the leaving church scene, and this is actually Friday.
I’m just confusing myself now, but, long story long, it’s one or the other.
The comic competition was on Friday and Trial and Sarah was Sunday.
Meaning Don’t Stop Billie-ving and This Was Halloween are Monday, Bring Me to Life Drawing was Tuesday, Turning Saints Into the Sea is Wednesday, Joementum was Thursday and this storyline is Friday.
There wasn’t a skipped day. You seem to be missing a storyline in your calculations.
I wasn’t counting storylines.
I was counting Lucy’s outfit changes, like I said.
The problem is that Lucy didn’t show up in one of the storylines at all: Bring Me to Life Drawing.
So there was a skipped day (of specifically Lucy’s outfit changes).
Two actually.
Saturday and, I guess, Tuesday.
So I was right that today was Friday in my original thinking, and I was right in how many outfits Lucy had been shown wearing.
I was wrong to use that as my basis to determine the number of days.
And I didn’t know there’s supposed to be a storyline per day.
Good to know.
That will make stuff like this easier in the future.
Thank you for helping to clear my confusion, cuz I was really going in circles for a bit.
That’s fair. I forgot Lucy wasn’t in that one. But yes, storylines are usually one per day, with time skips being marked. The exception is This Was Halloween, which doubles with Don’t Stop Billie-ving, because most of it is a flashback to Halloween.
Right, right, all of that makes sense. But the IMPORTANT part is where Friday now counts as the weekend.
Friday has been considered the weekend for as long as I’ve been alive.
My dictionary on my iPad specifically defines it as Friday evening through Sunday evening.
But it’s not evening yet, it’s morning right before they go to class. It’s not the weekend until your weeks work has ended.
if they’re going to class it’s not the weekend yet, and it’s not like they’d all be up in the morning on a snowy day when they don’t have class
“They’re Freshman in college, they’re twice as smart as you were at that age, they’re Freshman in college, they’re twice as smart as you were at that age…”
My mantra I repeat to myself when characters fumble this hard. He mentions out loud after Dorothy pushes him towards Lucy that asking out a black girl is likely to upset his mother, and he still doesn’t warn her (or let Sal know that they were coming). Godspeed.
I was looking for someone mentioning that Walky knew his mother would not be too thrilled with him dating a black girl. Glad someone did.
I get the impression he missed the date or that they came on a Friday rather than Saturday or something.
To be fair, this is one of THE classic symptoms of ADHD, so not exactly surprising from Walky here
A: Walky likely has diagnosed and untreated ADHD which I can tell you from experience can lead to easily forgetting important shit.
B: I don’t believe her. At most I’m betting she’s left several messages on his voicemail he hasn’t listened to/texts he hasn’t checked.
I am going with the option B I have ADHD and even when I am not on my medicine if someone tells me something a dozen times I will remember it most of the time it’s maybe twice or thrice. She probably called left a voice mail but like most people under 45 Walky didn’t even listen to it.
I’m the ADHD that requires constant reminders from other people up to day of (especially day of) because i will both forget it immediately and (mostly) because I never know what day it is.
However, I also agree B is more likely. Do people even check their voicemail?
My mom does when she has new ones. She’s over 45 though. I imagine I would too if I could set it up – it’s handy to have a way to leave a message if you needed to call me and I couldn’t answer.
And this is why I always explicitly negotiate “no answering service” as part of my phone contracts. My phone company of choice had no problem accommodating this, I’m not sure how others would respond but I’d imagine it should be similarly easy.
I mean that’s awesome that you can do that but it’s worth remembering that not all ADHD brains are identical and different people have different degrees of struggles with it. Like Bogeywoman, I absolutely need repeated reminders about stuff because I will still forget even if someone has reminded me multiple times.
For me the issue isn’t the frequency, it’s the timing. Some info just does not get filed into longterm memory (or if it does, I can’t seem to access my long term memory consistently) so unless I can do the thing I need to do RIGHT NOW, there is a good chance I’ll forget about it over and over again no matter how many times I’m told.
Literally once my kid reminded me for the 3rd time I needed to order her new markers. I said I would go to my tablet right away and order them so I didn’t forget again. By the time I had walked across the hall into my room, I’d already forgotten.
The solution for people like us is to use repeated reminders, but specifically to set them up so they occur at opportune times. I.e. so we get reminded when we can actually take the required action. For example, Walky may have forgotten to tell Sal because she didn’t happen to be nearby every time he got an email about their visit and he forgot by the time he saw her, but if she had been in the room one of those times, he would’ve been able to tell her.
It’s also possible he forgot to even check his email, or did check it but when he saw the emails he decided to look at them later, or his inbox is a horrific nightmare of chaos (this is a frequent ADHD problem) and he missed those emails among the other 1000+ unread ones he still needs to sort through. (ALL of these have been reasons why I didn’t deal with an email at various times)
Comment threading makes it unclear but this was in reply to UrsulaDavina above.
UNdiagnosed. Blame my spellcheck for not recognizing that as a word.
Don’t expect much from Walky and you won’t be disappointed
While this is probably true, this sort of sentiment about someone who likely has ADHD bums me out.
He’s a fictional character but for those of us who aren’t, it’s hard to tell if the tone here is intended to be disparaging/critical or just an honest assessment that this is something he struggles with.
Many people with ADHD *want* to meet others’ (and our own) expectations and live with constant anxiety/shame/guilt over our frequent inability to do so. We’ve seen that trait in Walky in fact, during the whole “failing math” arc. Not being able to study/focus on something and failing to meet expectations as a result, and then emotionally twisting yourself in knots over that failure but STILL not being able to do any better, is a VERY ADHD trait.
I would imagine in this moment he is thinking “oh sh*t I should’ve read those emails/I forgot about those messages! I should’ve told Sal!” and just generally mentally berating himself. But will still once again manage to forget to check his messages/tell Sal the next time it happens, in spite of how he might feel about it.
Also for the record while it’s fair to say you should lower expectations of people with ADHD in situations that involve memory, being on time, studying uninteresting subjects etc. there ARE some things we often excel at: being calm in a crisis, for example…another trait we saw in Walky during the kidnapping. Or being a wealth of information on obscure subjects that happen to interest the person. Or being remarkably good at completing tasks at the last minute/under pressure or hyperfocusing on tasks that are very exciting.
So while people do need to temper some expectations when a person has did, I hate the idea that you should never expect much of someone like this in general. It isn’t actually a fair assessment.
*”when a person has ADHD” not “when a person has did” thanks autocorrect.
given all the pics lucy took i’m surprised she didn’t have a public fb with her and walky or so lol unless she only sent them to her bro
It’s cute that you think we old-timers would be aware of something on FB.
Or that 18 year olds still use FB
If anything it’d be an Instagram page and even that’s kinda phasing out
I figured only old-timers still cared about Facebook.
Here’s a possible interpretation that could shine a positive light on Walky: he didn’t tell Sal because he assumed she wouldn’t be with him and he figured he could divert the parents away from her and save her the grief of even knowing they were around. It’s not a strong plan or a strong defense, but then again, it’s the sort of logic I could see Walky operating on
It’s a nice thought but tbh it seems far more likely he either didn’t see the messages or just forgot. 😅
My assumptions:
1) didn’t realize it was this weekend
2) didn’t see whatever Linda sent him
3) straight up forgot bc ADHD
Either way no way he knew his parents were coming imminently. We know how anxious walky is about his mother, we would’ve seen him freaking out at least a bit
To be fair this is just happening in moments, and he’s not had time to react yet. There’s no way he knew that their parents had not texted Sal until now, and we’ve not seen how he reacts about Lucy yet.
ADHD. he probably meant to but kept not remembering when it was a good time to mention it.
Srsly so many comments here that remind me how many people don’t really understand ADHD. I know we haven’t been explicitly told that’s what he’s dealing with, but enough people have commented on how much he shows the signs of it.
If someone is generally a decent person who seems to care about the feelings of others and they sometimes inexplicably flake out like this by not telling someone something or not getting something important done, especially if they frequently seem easily distracted, have trouble completing tasks/homework/studying, etc. it is MUCH more likely that they have ADHD and literally just forgot or otherwise struggled to complete the task because of disorganization, rather than that they are just suddenly being an uncaring jerk towards someone they care about.
😛 Reminds me of when I told my mom got a girlfriend and told her that her name was “Courtney” and my mom Disappointingly asked”oh, is she white?”
No cream in the coffee, son.
Or sugar. Or Vanilla. Damn. That’s gonna be a boring cup of coffee.
Hazelnut mocha?
I usually have coffee with at least 20% cream, I usually only drink it black if it’s like one of those StarBucks double shots or something.
I don’t drink coffee, though.
What are the racial allegories for sweet tea, Pepsi, kool-aid, various kinds of fruit juices, fruit punch, and the occasional hot chocolate?
Given that hot chocolate mixes can be done with either hot water or hot milk the milk still works for that. And then I guess sugar for the sweet tea and kool-aid work as well if someone is insane and doesn’t use the required level of sugar to make them in the first place.
Back when I worked in a hotel restaurant kitchen, I would post butcher paper on the walls with a new question on it each day. I’d hang a marker next to it and invite the wait staff to use the marker to write their own answers to the question.
One of the day’s questions was: “I like my love like I like my coffee: (fill in the blank).”
Folks came up with some fun answers: sweet, hot, strong, creamy, covered in foam…
How would fill in the blank?
Energizing, rejuvenating. 🥰
Microwaved
“Never created.”
Given time to cool down, when you can savour it instead of rushing and burning your tongue
“Chatty.”
One of the day’s questions was: “I like my love like I like my coffee: (fill in the blank).”
Folks came up with some fun answers: sweet, hot, strong, creamy, covered in foam…
How would fill in the blank?
Bird friendly. Pricey, but worth every penny. I like birds.
I like to give my coffee a scoop of ice cream
I like to study with my coffee.
I like my coffee to be fruity or nutty.
…yeah, totally tracks.
There def are ppl out there with ‘white ppl’ names lol.
Though back in the day some ppl would just call others oreos, or self-identified as one, idk if anyone would say that now tho
LINDA DAMN IT NO
So Linda told Walky a dozen times they were coming and didn’t tell Sal once? Wow, I mean the hugging Joyce thing was already commented on a lot, but completely ignoring one of your offspring is also messed up.
I wonder if Walky was looking at the messages
Wouldn’t be the first time.
I mean people probably didn’t comment on the ignoring Sal because it’s par for the course with her. It’s what she does. It would be like commenting on Joyce’s mother being a fundamentalist lunatic. We already knew that.
But people comment on that every day. A lot.
Oh no. I forgot that Linda was a thing when Walky and Lucy started being a prospective thing. She is almost certainly not going to be cool with Lucy dating her baby boy.
She is definitely going to be upset if she finds out about Lucy’s after 3rd date desires. I don’t think Walky or Lucy will outright tell her, but this is a comic and the chances that someone else mentions it is still a possibility. Possibly from Billie/Jennifer, as she is already annoyed with Walky.
I’m really curious to see what the form it takes. There’s a lot of ways Linda could be awful about this and I’m excited to see which one she picks.
“All of them” is my bet
Walky didn’t. He commented on how his mother wouldn’t be happy he was dating a black girl.
He specifically said that? When? (not meant argumentatively, i fully believe you i jsut don’t remember!)
The strip where Dorothy talked him into dating Lucy.
Found it:
https://www.dumbingofage.com/2021/comic/book-11/04-hompk/coward-2/
I forget: did Linda meet Dorothy as Walky’s romantic partner? Or did she miss that entirely?
They met on Freshman Family Weekend, when they together, yes. It was great, Linda entirely ignored Sal while she was in her boarding school uniform, offhandedly heard that Walky had a girlfriend, and then started shouting at him to set up a meeting/dinner.
Haha, she sure did
I’m sure this won’t cause problems.
Took me a bit to realize that Sal’s tossing the cig away as charles reaches for her. Great detail.
Okay nope sorry I don’t feel like a jen. First time avatar roulette let’s gooo.
How do you change it? I don’t feel like a time travelling mad scientist…
Change what letters are capitalised in the “email” field.
Ohh, now I understood the First panel. Sal’s position was kinda of awkward
A dozen times? Even if it’s a metaphor, was Walky that negligent in not really seeing this coming?
A moment of silence for Joyce being forcibly thrusted into a love triangle.
He’s not negligent, he’s severely avoidant. The mere existence of his parents stresses him out so severely and completely, that every single time she messaged him, he completely shut down emotionally, and probably threw it across the room. “Avoiding anything related to difficult emotions” is Walky’s primary character trait, and his Mom is literally a narcissistic abuser. He’s a dick to Sal here, but I’m pretty damned understanding of him just not wanting to think about his Mom, or her love-bombing, or her voluntelling him that he’s entertaining them this weekend, or honestly having anything to do with her.
If anything, he maybe didn’t bother telling Sal about them coming, because he knows from repeated experience that Sal doesn’t care to be around them, and that they don’t care whether Sal’s around. Sal can get away with being aloof, or leaving, or whatever; they expect nothing from her. But Walky is Linda’s perfect golden child, who she projects all her false love onto, and that sucks for him because he’s actually still scared of the consequences of disappointing her.
by “it” i meant “his phone,” I lost track of the words I actually needed to include for the message to be comprehensible
It, his phone, same thing really.
Can we please stop toting around the “narcissistic” part that’s not actually how it works
Seconded. There’s a lot going on with that comment, but calling Linda a “narcissistic abuser” (which isn’t even a thing no matter how much the tiktok hivemind wants it to be) is just ignorant
Seconded. She doesn’t fit the label and this stereotyping harms people who do.
Completely accurate reading of his character.
Lest we all forget, he used to shut down completely and throw toys at Dorothy when he had a crush on her. She was really good for him, and he improved IMMENSELY with her
I dunno, it’s possible but I honestly think this is over-thinking the situation and I actually disagree with this read of his character. He shut down around Dorothy because 1-it was his first real crush and 2-he didn’t know wtf to do about the situation or how to interact with a girl he had feelings for because he’d never been in that situation before. And yeah when he is stressed about stuff and doesn’t know how to resolve it, he does tend to choose avoidance, but he doesn’t shut down completely, just tries to directly avoid the specific thing causing his anxiety while still obsessively thinking about it.
Until fairly recently he seemed to have a good relationship with his parents whereas the above super involved reaction would be more indicative of a lifetime of anxiety around their relationship. He has recently developed a fraught relationship with them (especially his mom) thanks to his discussions with Sal/revelations about their respective dynamics, but his past behavior suggests he tends to actively think about/fret about things that cause him anxiety even if he *wants* to ignore them.
I think also in light of his recently improved relationship with Sal and realizations about her struggles with their parents, he’d at least want to give her a heads up if he were actively thinking about the impending visit.
IMO it’s much more likely he didn’t even see/read the messages because he forgot to check his email or because his inbox is a chaotic mess or he did read them and then promptly forgot about their existence, because he really seems to have undiagnosed ADHD.
she probably left messages and he never checked them. Or non-diagnosed ADHD brain go burrrr.
Seconding Ghola: most likely he either didn’t check the messages, or checked them and promptly forgot about them because ADHD.
In the ADHD brain, the filing box for “deal with later” and “delete all memory of from existence” look identical and stuff is routinely misfiled.
Ohhhh hey I just realized, when did Sal start smoking (lit) cigarettes again?
She never stopped. She’s smoked throughout the entire comic.
Also what day of the week is this? Even if it was Friday it would be weird to pop up at nine in the morning before class, but it gets even weirder if it not Friday. How far away do they even live from campus? Did they get up at five in the morning to drive there and try to catch them when they weren’t prepared? And ultimately what is Linda’s ulterior motive in all this?
It’s Friday.
It’s Friday, it’s about a 2 hour drive. She probably told Walky what time to expect them and what her plan is.
You sure? Does that sound like Linda to you? I’m betting vague message he didn’t listen to/read.
Planning to show up early in the morning right before his class? That doesn’t make any sense unless she’s planning on disruption. Which she wouldn’t tell him.
Plus she just told Sal that she told him, so that all but disproves it.
Maybe Linda wants to drop some not so subtle hints to Walky that it would be a really wise choice to look into the medschool program for next term? She still doesn’t display any interest in her daugther and on parent day she was bragging to Dorothy’s mother that her son would be a medical student once he “recognized ” his real major.
Walky dating Joyce? Nah, that would never happen. Totally implausible.
This will not end well, I’m calling it now.
Best case scenario: It ends in hurt feelings and tears.
Worst case scenario: Insufficient data to extrapolate outcome.
So anyone have any guesses as to the worst scenario? Or any guesses as to how this is likely to go?
Worst case: Lucy shanks Linda, and we all say, “Damn right.”
I think you are confusing a great scenario and thinking of it as a bad one. Long term consequences be damned, Linda has earned it a dozen times over.
You misspelled best. It’s B E S T not W O R S T.
There’s like three new relationships and all of them are at risk of getting torpedoed by these dinguses.
It’s parents. Parents never end well in this comic. Low chance of supervillainy kidnapping and/or murder being involved with this particular pair of parents but it’s still unlikely to end well.
Oh fuck please tell me they won’t be here for two freaking days story time. I don’t have that kind of blood pressure.
Interesting Sal throws away her cigarette even though it’s legal for her to smoke and her mom is a smoker. And it’s good detail that Walky gets a hug but not Sal – though in Charles’ defence, Sal’s not really a hugging person unless it’s from Marcie. And, I’m assuming, Danny.
Seriously though, yes, Lucy and Sarah, run. It’s too late for Walky and Joyce.
Is it legal for her to smoke? I thought her and Walky were 18 or 19. These days it’s 21 to smoke. Relatively recent change.
Ah, okay. I wasn’t aware they’d raised the legal smoking age. I thought it was still 18.
I’m more surprised that it’d be legal to smoke on campus.
Well, IU can’t make laws but it is forbidden to use tobacco products on University property, including University vehicles anywhere in the world. But Sal is one of those people who enjoy knowing how to break rules….
i’m sure it’ll switch between them and another story line (which, ironically would drag it out more lol)
@proxie even if it was , sal was doing a ‘good girl’ act in front of her parents briefly, not sure if she’s rly changed back to full ‘badass cool girl’
Oh, I didn’t notice the cigarette being thrown, I thought she was actively preventing the hug!
“Oh fuck please tell me they won’t be here for two freaking days story time. I don’t have that kind of blood pressure.”
I got bad news for you: why do you think Sal’s “weekend?!” is on a panel all its own?
Shhhhh lemme have my denial. 😛
I think Egypt is sort of using it.
I’m guessing it’s a “choose your battles” decision and a “caught off her guard” decision. Sal likely doesn’t want to deliberately provoke her parents (i.e. her mom) and I doubt the “it’s legal” argument will fly in Linda Walkerton’s household.
Probably not, although it’s also true they aren’t in her household and Linda smokes too, but yeah, picking her battles. I was also wrong about it being legal for Sal, apparently the age has gone up.
It also just feels like something you don’t do in front of your parents, not while you’re still that young at least. Doubly when you’re already marked the bad child.
I’m almost 23 and i still feel awkward grabbing drinks at family events. I didn’t even wanna let my parents know I smoked weed until my cousin and aunt offered me a joint yesterday
“The Weekend” could mean until Sunday afternoon, so the rest of 2023.
I’ll melt from the wicked witch from that much Linda exposure! D:
This is a god, and they’re amusing themself with ironic punishment for Joyce for her day with Jacob and his brother.
Goddamn you, Willis.
I *really* do not see this turning into a repeat of that.
More like a contrast. The Jacob situation was meeting someone would have supported the couple as long as it was they were both happy. Here we have someone not liking what she sees and trying to force a false couple together regardless of what they want. Joyce has no desire to please Linda so I could see it playing out as her saying no with Linda trying to play if off as “joking”
Oooof. Here’s hoping Joyce immediately corrects the awful lady. Don’t stay in the web, Joyce! Take everyone you can and go!
Joyce: No Mrs Walkerton, I hate your son and would never date him, try again. Runs away. Linda: oh she’s got such a quirky sense of humor David!.
or just brag about her own actual bf.
Yeah, Joyce is dating a Jew, I’m sure if she tells Linda that, Linda will rescind any belief that Joyce is a good person or a good influence on her son.
I think you’re just bad at media literacy
A lot of gentiles are like that, I wouldn’t be surprised.
Walky didn’t just drop the ball he drop kicked it into a window.and of course Linda did exactly what we knew Linda would do what she did.
Also you couldn’t you couldn’t even text Sal? Cripes Linda is o e of the worst the other being Joyce’s mom. Blaine and Ross are dead.
This is not even really worth rating, if you ask me. Like, I genuinely don’t know how much prep Sal or Walky could do that’d make Linda and Charles a non-shitty presence.
It’s not about the parents being less awful, it’s about giving the people like Sal and Lucy time to emotionally prepare for the impact. Especially when Walky not bothering to give either the heads up just makes it seem like he didn’t care about their feelings.
I agree with this
Considering he’s actively warning them and telling Lucy to run? I’m pretty sure he literally did not read the messages that were sent to him.
“Parents are visiting” is definitely on Walky’s “I don’t want to deal with this right now” pile. He may have made some progress regarding his relationship with Sal, but he’s still Walky. Avoidance is is modus operandi.
Yeah. Or, also entirely possible he *did* read them and then promptly forgot they existed. If he does indeed have ADHD as so many readers (myself included) suspect, it could be either one.
With ADHD sometimes reading a message about an upcoming event still doesn’t help because your brain will just not file the information in any sort of accessible way and it will essentially be like you never read it until someone/something reminds you and the memory of having read it finally returns.
I get why it seems that way but if he does indeed have ADHD, he deserves some benefit of the doubt. Not remembering to tell someone something important is not an indicator of lack of care for their feelings if the person has ADHD. It’s an indicator of a brain with insufficient executive functioning skills and poor memory.
It’s actually one of the most common and frustrating assumptions about people with ADHD that our apparent flakiness, forgetfulness, etc. is because we just don’t care.
Whether it’s caring about someone else’s feelings, caring about the importance of the task at hand, caring about personal success, etc. ADHD makes it hard to prioritize things even when not doing them results in consequences you’re really not okay with (such as hurting or angering someone you care about, failing a test, not accomplishing an important personal goal, etc).
This is also why shame is such an ineffective tool to motivate people with ADHD. Often people with ADHD already experience a ton of shame and guilt over our inability to focus or remember stuff, and external shame just makes us feel worse and causes things like depression and anxiety, but doesn’t actually resolve the issue or make it any more likely we’ll do better in the future.
Here’s an analogy: someone writes down lengthy instructions and emails them to you, but you are only allowed to glance at them for 1 second before the file deletes itself. You might remember some of the email, but you probably didn’t have time to read and commit to memory the entire thing, it’s even possible you only managed to see the subject line, which was vague and gave no indication of the contents.
Now imagine a few days later, the person asks you why you didn’t do the thing they asked you to do in the email? They sent you the instructions, so surely you should’ve read them and been able to do it? You protest that you were only able to access the email for 1 second, can’t read an entire lengthy email in 1 second, and don’t have a photographic memory, but this person is superhuman and *can* read and memorize an entire email in 1 second so they don’t understand why you couldn’t, and assume it must be because you just didn’t care about it, not understanding that you did try your best.
It’s not a perfect analogy, but that’s a bit what memory and trying to do future tasks is like when you have ADHD, trying to navigate a world designed around neurotypical expectations.
i imagine walky was prolly distracted by his breakfast group or so, or maybe got the ‘headsup’ from his parents while he was with lucy during their last date
Even assuming Linda is telling the truth (not something I’d bet on), why would Walky think he has to tell Sal?
He’s started to pick up on some things, but would probably still expect them to have contacted both of them. And they’re early. If he expected them over the weekend he may just not have told Sal yet.
Yeah, putting it off rather than not refusing to do it at all seems like a Walky thing to do.
then they show up early.
Yeah nothing in the story indicates he intentionally didn’t tell Sal or didn’t care enough to tell her. People assuming that really need to better familiarize themselves with how ADHD brains work.
Linda, fucking control yourself.
Linda doesn’t control herself she just tries to controls others.
Ugh, poor Lucy. I’d love it if she stands up for herself against Linda. Even better if her golden son pushes back too, but I wouldn’t be surprised if Linda accuses Lucy of turning him against her.
I do feel like Walky will step up to bat, but honestly, part of me wouldn’t be surprised if Jennifer winds up doing it, too, since they treat her more like their daughter than they do Sal.
Or it could go another way. Walky could act the hero, state emphatically that Lucy is his girlfriend, and cement that relationship a little more. And Lucy falling in love with him that much more.
Oh, dear. This is it. Lucy is going to blurt out “we’re in love!” and Walky will *have to* deal with it, at the worst possible time.
I don’t know about “worst case”, but I hope Sal doesn’t end up dropping Danny after finding out that Linda approves of him. (Alternately, I suppose Danny could end up telling Linda off, but I doubt he has that in him.)
I’m hoping Danny breaks expectations and shows some growth. He had an eye opening moment with Blaine one why you don’t always listen to someone’s who’s your elder but I can also see him disappointing sal by not standing with her and reverting to his passive people pleaser ways.
If anything could make Danny snap at an authority figure, I think it’d be Linda being an asshole to Sal. He’s learned from Blaine.
I’m rooting for Danny to really Dan it up with Linda, in the most aggro way possible.
interesting (and devastating) thought 🤔 Danny’s been more assertive lately though. maybe he’d have a snappy come back at least
I don’t doubt him, we’ve seen him stand up for him and sal as a couple before, he’s got a shiny new spine since they started dating. Before that even, she’s a good influence on him. He might be worried about being respectful at first but i have no doubt he’s gonna be *pissed* when he sees how sal’s parents treat her. Maybe moreso if he notices them/Linda treating him better than Lucy
Danny will say Linda’s name coldly, and Linda will respond by talking about Sal’s vulva, that Danny should think about having sex with her when he’s having sex with Sal, and then say, “Look, it’s cool Dan-O” as if she hadn’t the one being uncool.
…. so, wait. They told Walky they were coming to visit twelve times, but never even sent Sal a quick text or email about it?
…. I mean, yeah, it checks out, and yeah, Walky did drop the ball, but that still feels more like Linda and Charles are the ones to blame for that.
Yeah just goes to show that even if Charles might seem like the nicer of the two he doesn’t have Sals back anymore then Linda.
Like Joyce’s dad, if he had his kids back he wouldn’t still be married to his wife.
Isn’t he getting a divorce? He did not have his kids back for a long time, but maybe he started after the kidnapping.
I’m fairly certain they are divorcing but I can’t find the comic(s) mentioning it.
Yes they are.
It was a Joyce-and-Sarah comic fairly early after the time skip, but there’s lots of those and I don’t remember exactly where it is…
https://www.dumbingofage.com/2021/comic/book-11/02-look-straight-ahead/eyeballs/
I’m not sure Charles is nicer, but he is a lot quieter. I feel I really don’t know anything about him. If I had to guess, I’d guess his position is: keep your head down and smile a lot, don’t wanna cause strife in the family.
I think he’s nicer, but not any better.
Nice is different than good.
He’s passive. An enabler. He’ll never acknowledge his wife’s abuse and controlling behavior towards their kids. He’s gonna get cut off when sal and walky are financially independent right along side linda
There’s a very good chance she’s lying. And also a good chance it doesn’t even occur to her to consider whether it’s true.
Yeah, it’s fair to blame Walky for not giving Sal a heads up, considering their circumstances, but focusing on that ignores the deeper problem that is how those parents treat her.
I’m not surprised that their mom only texted Walky, but I would have expected their dad to know his kids well enough to give Sal a heads up himself.
I get the impression that Charles wants to spend more time with Sal. He knows she doesn’t want that though and he doesn’t get why. So him knowing Sal better might be why he didn’t text her.
Assuming of course that they even have her number. Walky didn’t when he first got to university and I wouldn’t be shocked Sal doesn’t want her parents to be able to contact her at all times.
My impression was that Charles let’s his wife make all the decisions to the point where you have to directly ask him to do something Linda didn’t suggest before he will even consider breaking the routine and Sal isn’t going to ask because she has already been disappointed and hurt and isn’t in a rush to repeat the experience.
I think Charles tends to agree with Linda more often than not, but unlike Linda I think he feels guilty when it alienates his daughter, because he DOES want her to have a good relationship with him.
Meanwhile I think Linda’s written her off as a lost cause. A lost cause who needs to listen to her more but well, if she did that she wouldn’t be lost, now would she?
So far we haven’t seen Charles disagree with Linda period. He shows no acknowledgement that Sal has been alienated. He might want to have a relationship with his daugther but he doesn’t try at all to make it happen. When Sal told him she could not spend time on parents day because of a hair appointment he didn’t even try to say they would really like her company if she could reschedule? In my opinion Charles doesn’t deserve any benefit of the doubt until he’s seen to actually try to show care beyond a standard greeting.
Yeah, he might be confused about Sal not wanting to be around them (seriously, how though) but I’m not sure he feels guilt; it’s not clear that he even realizes he’s doing something wrong.
The reason I think he sometimes feels guilty is the face he makes when Sal says she hates her mother back when Linda stole her money.
Now, does this guilt mean he’s gonna say or do fuck all to actually fix things? Of course he’s not. Maybe ‘upsets his daughter’ is better phrasing, but Charles isn’t 100% oblivious about some things.
I just don’t think he realizes this is why Sal makes hours long hair appointments when they visit and still goes ‘Awww, now?’
It’s called a “narcissistic accessory,” and they make great partners for narcissists, because of their complete lack of a spine, and general enabling behavior. Generally, it’s somebody so insecure, they’re willing to put up with nearly anything, just to believe that one person loves them. Even better if their narcissist actually unloads most of their abuse and toxic expectations on somebody else nearby, and not them!
Can we stop toting around the “narcissistic” part that’s not how it works. Entitlement is not a result of a personality disorder.
Do I care?
Checks.
No, no I don’t.
You should. People with personality disorders are far more likely to be victims of abuse and experience homelessness at much higher rates. Careless applications of narcissism to everyone we don’t like is part of the ableist demonization of cluster B mental disorders that leaves people without means of support or rehabilitation.
Do better.
Weird brag tbh
Please stop picking up psychology buzzwords from social media
+1
Good point with the phone number. I’m not saying Sal would be wrong to not be reachable, but only calling Walky might not be a direct slight.
Sidenote, anybody else get a sinking feeling that Sal’s suddenly going to become the favorite child once Linda gets a look at both kids’ partners?
Some people do but I really don’t think so. She’s ‘made them look like bad parents’ too often to ever be the favourite I think.
College partners can cause a crisis with parents (if they don’t like them): It’s just old enough for them to start getting concerned that the partner is serious enough to stay around FOREVER, but young enough for them to think that if they express disapproval, they still have enough influence to force a break-up. Having a “better” partner can absolutely sky-rocket a sibling to “favorite” status, although it usually takes longer than the general speed that DOA moves at—it’s noticeable, but not immediate.
That said, I also think “golden child” status is immutable, even if another child might be the “favorite” at different times. The golden child will always be the golden child, even if the other one hangs out with the parents more. Kind of like a woman and man on the same level in a male-dominated, sexist workplace; even if the woman consistently performs better, the male counterpart will always be the man.
I’m sure it happens with college partners, but from what I know about parents like Linda, once you lose their esteem, it’s gone. I don’t think anything Sal does could possibly rocket her back up the ranks. It can for other kinds of parents, but with these two, they’ve already decided Sal is the ‘bad child’ who ‘makes them look like bad parents’ by smoking and dressing in a way they don’t approve and hanging out with people they don’t like and the criminal record, etc.
On the other hand, if there’s one thing I don’t associate DOA villains with, it’s their subtlety. I wouldn’t be surprised if the OP is at least half-right.
I think it will be less that Linda would be especially pleased by Danny, exactly, and more that Linda has likely no real expectations of Sal. She will likely be surprised, but if anyone’s their favorite, it’ll maybe be Jennifer, someone they already treat as more their child than they do Sal.
I mean, the Walkerton parents, like most of Jennifer’s friend group, only really “like” her, because of her direct association with her powerful parents. Narcissists fully evaluate most people by how directly useful their connections are.
Seriously, please stop.
Any more obtuse psychobabble? You realize you’re just making shit up at this point, right?
What will Linda think of her favorite daughter hooking up with a hoodlum who was a bad influence on her other daughter?
/s (but only a little bit)
Yeah. I could be wrong but I get the impression this is a scenario where it doesn’t matter what Sal does, she’ll still struggle to win her mother’s approval.
I predicted this literally months ago. Sal is dating a nice, kindly white guy. She’s the new kid with a good head on her shoulders, because the only things that Linda actually wants from her kids are more white babies.
Some parents like this do switch up which child is the golden child and which one is the scapegoat. I don’t see Linda doing it.
This strip honestly does a lot to highlight how well-planned and written DoA is. Think about it. This punchline essentially requires the presence of these particular girls, that if it was just Lucy, one could chalk it up to Linda singling out Joyce just by coin toss. But no, it being Lucy, Sarah, and Joyce, and it’s just the white girl? That’s much dicier.
But, where the good planning shows is that this group makeup is all plausibly together because of circumstances set up by the Raidah breakfast months ago. Lucy and Sarah had interacted some prior, sure, but not a hell of a lot, but now there is the underlying tension that was already taking place when the Walkertons dropped in and made made everyone super uncomfortable on top of it.
Additionally, this does feel like it’s going to pay off how, since Walky was on-panel with his parents last, a whole lot of shit has happened. His comment that his mom was going to be pissed he was dating a black girl to Lucy, boy is that being paid off now.
Huh, I wonder if Walky’s mom is still– Yup. OK.
As much as I dislike Linda her appearance as one positive effect, unity in the comments. People stop (to me seemingly too intense) discussions which other character is wrong or more wrong and unite in their dislike for Linda. Nothing unites like a vile enemy.
If it helps I can accuse people of being ageist and only hating Linda because she’s older and intruding on the space of the young.
Thank you.
Plays “It’s Not You” by Blotto on hacked muzak.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lWcFZSSeQX8
Wrong universe, Linda.
There gonna send you back to mother in a card board box!
You better run!
Run, run, run, run
Well, at least Wally wasn’t trying to pick Lucy’s locks when they arrived!
*Walky
Easy enough mistake for Linda to make, I guess. What was it Lucy called Joyce? “White bisexual me”?
Yes. I’m being a little sarcastic in letting Linda off the hook for racism. If all she knows is that Walky has a new ladyfriend it’s pretty icky for her to assume that of three women in the group only the White one is eligible.
The arrival of the Racist Rents. The plot thickens.
Seriously Linda? Joyce and Walky? I mean…It’s Walky!? I can’t imagine them being together.
Nice.
plot twist: somehow joe and lucy end up breaking up with them and they get together anyways, fated to be together no matter which iteration whether they want to or not /shot XD
Well i doubt it but it is amusing how vehement the both of them would be against it here/now
Joe and Lucy break up with them, Lucy starts dating Joyce and Joe starts dating Walky.
Was gonna make the same joke with Joe and Lucy.
Because of the Joyces in this comic Lucy is probably the most stable Joyce.
Honestly, way back at the beginning of the series i was kind of assuming the whole thing was still going to end with the two of them getting together. Even when Walky was with Dorothy and that seemed so permanent, i was working on the assumption that Joyce and Walky were the destined couple.
Nowadays i’m not so sure which way it’ll go. I could see Willis playing the long game and still getting them together even with all the new relationships between them. Or it’ll just flat out not happen. Time will tell.
I could see it happening but if it did then it’ll be far off. There’s only been like one hint that there’s any attraction between the two but it’s still there.
Even though I started with It’s Walky back in the day, I just cannot see the 2 of them together in this universe at all. Their chemistry feels totally different.
Maybe in some alternate universe.
Unless I’m mistaken, the curve of Charles’ grin is very Walkyesque. Or maybe it’s the combination of the curve and the head shape.
Wow, Linda, do you hear yourself? You only told David.
Just, like, saying that openly, are we?
“Just because I never speak with you doesn’t mean I’m not talking to your brother all the time. I thought you knew that!”
Good lord. And still having the audacity to wonder why Sal doesn’t want to be around them.
Those sneaky missing missing reasons, huh.
She may not have Sal’s phone number. She didn’t give it to Walky right away and god knows she doesn’t want her parents to have MORE access to her.
Exactly who’s paying for this phone? Has Sal been employed this whole time? Because if not, my guess is that the parents are paying for the phone, just like they’re paying for college, and even good parents are unlikely to pay for their child to have a phone line and not tell them the number.
Not sure. We know Sal had the money to pay for a new motorcycle (it’s probably not used, she got the jacket that came with it) and the accompanying insurance and upkeep until this winter, so she had a job at some point and apparently had quite a bit saved. Maybe when the money got low, she chose her phone over the bike.
So if Sal bought her phone she may not have given them the number. Though even if they did, yeah, they wouldn’t actually care enough to call her so what difference does it make?
Also, even if they really don’t have her phone number, they could’ve sent her a postcard.
“Hi, honey! We know you are really weird about calling us, but that’s okay, we love you anyway and want you to know we’re visiting!”
Oh, that wasn’t a defence for Linda, that was me going ‘Sal might not want to give them her number and I can’t blame her’. There’s no excuse for them not to try to contact Sal.
*biting her biting her biting her bite*
“Nobody. Move. A muscle.”
https://youtu.be/LROHUiasQTQ
Speaking as someone with treated ADHD, even if I’ve been told something a dozen times when it happens there is a non-zero chance that my brain would have filed it under not-relevant-yet-so-forget. Walky doesn’t even have methylphenidate to help him
In my case, I know my parents would tell all the siblings. In this case, it’s depressingly inevitable that they don’t tell Sal
In my entire school years I don’t think I told my parents about more than like… a quarter of all parent-teacher meetings we’d been told about and instructed to write down. Stuff you aren’t interested in just flees the brain as soon as it enters it.
Right? I’m so grateful my school sent important info home in paper format and my mom always had the good sense to check my backpack/folders.
Now that I’M the mom, I keep forgetting to check my kid’s backpack every day…but thank goodness they have apps for parents now where they post stuff (and my own kid is much better at remembering to tell me about stuff).
I tend to put stuff in the “that’s complicated I will process it later” shelf and then forget about it because that shelf is really cluttered
Like the in-brain version of the infamous ADHD Doom Boxes.
Can confirm.
I can’t tell if ADHD meds have actually improved my memory at all, it’s still atrocious. What they *have* done is given me the mental clarity and self-awareness to realize I need to write everything down immediately so I don’t forget (and usually at least enough memory to do that…usually…)
Also your “filed under not relevant yet so forget” comment made me think: it’s a lot like memory is a bunch of boxes, with immediate events closest and future events lined up further away the farther they are in the future.
And when NT people are told about a future event, their brain walks over to the correct future date box and puts the info in. But with ADHD, it’s like our brain is stuck in the chair next to the “now” box. It refuses to get up or can’t get up so it just tosses the thought in the general direction of the future box, but the further away it is, the more likely it is to miss the box and be lost forever.
Yep, yep, and yep. Also I love your Gravatar
Thank you! It is my cat. 🙂
Woo! Neuro divergent represent!
Does Sal have plans this weekend, or is she just reacting to the fact that the weekend is a whole like, two days of having to deal with parents
as far as I am aware, Sal’s short-term plans primarily include finding a spontaneous moment to bang her boyfriend. She was already flustered about it because this is the first time she’s had an emotionally meaningful relationship with a suitor who brings her flowers and serenades her on his ukulele and doesn’t buy into her ‘bad girl’ image/reputation, so the timing couldn’t be worse.
She doesn’t have plans because she didn’t know they were coming. If she’d know, she could have planned a road trip.
Yeah, Marcie would spontaneously need to go back to Tennessee for something.
The fact Marcie is working all weekend and will be at the Target 20 minutes away is irrelevant
Mrs Walkerton clearly a Joyce and Walky die-hard.
Suddenly, racism!
Middle panel Walky’s eye and mouth are sliding towards the edge of his face. I love the throwback art style popping up every so often.
They can’t catch you all if you scatter in different directions.
BOY this is going to be mighty interesting when Linda realizes who Joyce is. Will she lose her shit at Walky for dating the girl whose church got them kidnapped? Will we find out if she ever sued them? Will her shock be worse when she finds out her son’s new gf is Black? Only good things can happen from here
Tune in tomorrow for another thrilling episode!
Geeze I didn’t realize how much Walky was pulling an Elan last strip.
What are the odds the Walkertons cross paths with Dorothy at some point before the weekend is up?
Dorothy going to Walky’s room to formally apologize, and seeing or hearing his parents. Wanting to hide, she ducks into the next room with an open door. It’s Arnold and Ken’s room. Arnold’s home, and talking to someone who doesn’t have an image of her as never making mistakes or never struggling is a great comfort. …
Who’s ready for Linda to point to her husband when accused of being racist here?
And then we get the unfortunate realization… Linda Walkerton 25 years ago? Probably not a bigot. Today? Yeah, she went further “right” as she got older, she just is loathe to admit it.
She ain’t the only boomer that used to have (what were once considered) “progressive views” to grow into shit as they age.
But my bigotry here is okay cause it’s only Ageist and not racist or creedist or x-phobic.
And will stay that way for another 10 years until the progressive half of Gen X realizes they don’t want to be represented by the Joe Rogan crowd.
“If a man is not a liberal at twenty, he has no heart, and if he is not a conservative at forty, he has no head.”
Honestly that adage has always been extremely suspect.
Heck, if anything I’m WAY more liberal at 36 than I was at 18.
Turns out, people don’t age to become conservative, it’s just that conservatives tend to live longer. (Because they’re vampires.)
My understanding is people usually don’t change to get more conservative as they get older. The definition of liberal and conservative changes and the line moves faster than the individual.
I suspect this adage is the result of 2 different things:
I think some people actively shift further right as they get older while for others, it’s just that as *society* becomes more progressive, views that used to be considered radically progressive become the bare minimum of leftist ideology.
“Progressive for 1980” is a much lower bar than “progressive in 2023” and if a person’s views stagnate rather than becoming more progressive with the times, suddenly they may find they don’t see eye-to-eye with modern-day progressives.
As for the former group, I wonder if that has a lot to do with relative struggle vs. comfort. In the US, until fairly recently, each subsequent generation would end up with more wealth and success than their parents. So if we assume that struggle often makes people more inclined to be progressive (since they’re more directly aware of and impacted by societal inequalities) and security/wealth often makes people more conservative (because they’re less directly impacted by societal inequalities, and may in fact benefit from them, such as lower taxes for the wealthy) I can see how previous generations (such as boomers and at least half of gen x) might become more conservative with age.
Millennials are the first generation in recent history to earn less than their parents. When you’re still struggling financially at 30 (or know enough people who are) and things like financial security and retirement aren’t guarantees even when you are currently financially stable, a person is probably more likely to still pay attention to societal inequality and less likely to vote for things that benefit those with the most privilege at the cost of those with less.
Basically that’s my theory anyway on why that adage exists and why so many in more recent gens (such as millennial and younger) find it doesn’t fit them at all.
Plus millennials and younger gen x are also the first gen to be super comfortable with the internet, and use it way more than our parents do, and the internet has a way of increasing awareness about societal issues since we see more of what various other groups we may not belong to are going through.
Whereas older less internet savvy people are probably more likely to spend their days in echo-chambers of people who are close to their age and have similar circumstances. (Obviously echo chambers can form online too, but you’re still more likely to be exposed to people from different groups/backgrounds/ages on an equal playing field online than in person.
“Years ago my mother used to say to me, she’d say, “In this world, Elwood, you must be” – she always called me Elwood – “In this world, Elwood, you must be oh so smart or oh so pleasant.” Well, for years I was smart. I recommend pleasant. You may quote me. “
She always called me Elwood. – Uly
Implying that right wing politics are in any way good or intelligent is suspect as hell.
Seconded.
That’s dumb
This storyline will be about parents, isn’t?
♫ Father says “your mother’s right, she’s really up on things. Before we married, mommy served with the WACs in the Philippines.” ♫
Racist lady is racist, holy shit Linda.
oh ick the gravatar formula changed again uh second attempt
third?
Closest match to me by appearance, bingo.
How do I rotate it?
Change the capitalization of your email address
Seriously?
Ok, this is bizarre
there’s a 50% chance of getting any specific avatar upon rolling the dice 20 times 😉
That assumes that all avatars are equally likely. A supposition I find to be suspect.
Eh, what suggests that they aren’t all equally likely? 🤔
Then if Willis adds more default Gravatars (like Charlie was added recently), the defaults are randomized and you get to find your favorite all over again!
This is the weirdest way to assign avatars I have ever encountered. Why can’t we choose, or use our own?
I guess I’ll just keep going… sigh
Forever, and ever
and ever
that’s not fair, the previous one is the same as with no caps spelling
Make it stop…
I’m running out of letters and patience. I guess doubling up works.
Don’t waste your time, Walky. The strip is called Dumbing of Age for a good reason. They won’t run.
Zeroed in on the white girl as her son’s significant other AND didn’t tell Sal they were coming, only told David. Incredible parenting going on around here.
Wait what day of the week is it today? In comic time, I mean.
Friday
One chapter = one day. There’s been no time skips, but “this was halloween” was mostly flashback where the present-time strips look place during the end of the chapter before.
Liz first showed up on a Friday (Sister, Christian).
Right now, they (minus Sarah) are headed to math, a MWF class.
Now Lucy, when I say “run”, run.
RUN!
SAVE YOURSELF!
uh oh. lmao i have a feeling mrs. walkerton’s assumption on who the girlfriend has….. implications
in linda’s defense, walky’s last two girlfriends (well, girlfriend and unlabeled “might have gone somewhere if not for a trauma conga implosion” fwb type situation) had been white girls with glasses. i dont remember if he’s told her anything about either of them, but if i were her i’d definitely assume he has a type and was seeing another white girl with glasses based on that. not that there isn’t likely a racial bias happening here, narratively.
I’d give her benefit of the doubt, but she hasn’t shown any reason to do so.
okay? i’m not giving her the benefit of the doubt, i’m making an observation.
I was actually gonna say the same thing but also yeah shes definitely assuming white girl with glasses instead of black girl with glasses not just cause she assumes walky’s type but also her own preferences in a future daughter in law.
Is it just me or is “David’s whispering to someone? Clearly it must be his girlfriend, so I should single out the most likely one out of the three candidates and lavish her with my affections with no further questions” a real weird line of reasoning even beyond the racism?
It’s a very weird line of reasoning that a certain type of person absolutely subscribes to.
I mean… Walky did call this out a couple of days ago in-univese
ok wait, why is sal so shocked about “weekend” specifically
Probably because she just assumed this was a house call/one day visit. Maybe a luncheon, chitty chat, then say bye. Weekend means at least two full days of rubbing elbows with her parents.
Or it could be something we don’t know about yet, or it could be that she’s repeating words in continued surprise.
Metal Gear!?”
I was also wondering that. Is it because it’s (presumably) Friday and shouldn’t count as a weekend yet?
aw, man. upsettingly, patreon post blurring is a lot clearer now. checking out the posts beforehand is now a matter of ‘i can see most of the strip’, instead of ‘fun guessing game’
Phooey. Thanks for the warning! Even the text seems almost legible…
They must have changed that sometime today; this morning it was still “barely make out which characters appear” blurry.
Oxford English dictionary defines a day of the week other than Saturday or Sunday to be wekday. Or to quote dictionary.com “What is a weekday? A weekday is any day that is not a weekend day. Since the weekend is considered to consist of Saturday and Sunday, the weekdays are Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday.”
You have a defective online dictionary.
And this became totally disassociated from what I was replying to.
Huh. Same thing happened to me, and I thought last time it’s because the comment I was replying to was flagged out of existence. 🤔
And we are off to a fantastic start! Oh boy…