Valentinez Alkalinella Xifax Sicidabohertz Gombigobella Blue Stradivari Talentrent Pierre Andre Charton-Haymoss Ivanovicci Baldeus George Doitzel Kaiser the 3rd
Rule 34: There is porn of it. No exceptions.
Rule 35: If there is no porn of it, it will be created so as to appear that it has always been there.
Rule 36: If it exists (and of course it exists – see rules 34 and 35), someone has a fetish for it. No exceptions.
Rule 63: For every character there exists an opposite-gender counterpart. Only exception is if the male character is so androgynous that the female character would be no different.
And I think, with the introduction of Joshua/Jocelyne, that Willis has covered all four of these.
I had a friend who was an insomniac, and before I knew that about him I would always ask “When do you sleep?” and he’d always reply “I don’t sleep, I just rage-quit for a few hours.”
Any smart college student should always sleep with a weapon. A dormitory is nothing more than a madhouse for violent post-pubescent teens. Monsters under the bed indeed.
My guess would be that Joyce just altered Sal’s expectations of when she’s supposed to be waken up, and now Sal may alter the deal further by re-arranging Joyce’s perky face
Not to be “that guy”, but what Vader actually said was “I am altering the deal. Pray I do not alter it further.” Could be that Willis misremembered the quote, or it could be that he’s altering the quote for his purposes (in which case we should perhaps pray he doesn’t alter it further).
Darth Vader and Lando Calrissian (spelling?) in “Empire Strikes Back”. Also a reference to Vader “force-choking” one of his subordinates in the original “Star Wars”.
Welllll they’re much closer geographically. All of the Maritime provinces (minus Newfoundland & Labrador), including the water between them, would fit nicely in any non-Martime province.
I have heard it said (by a resident of the Niagara region), that a Prince Edward Islander was a “Newfie” who was going to Toronto but ran out of money.
Nah, she’ll just get choked out, Sal will go back to sleep then wake up before Joyce does and return the bad in your face wake-up. Pass-out induced headaches are rather like hangover ones.
I am not the the one to condone violence so punching is right out.
Now grabbing her by the shirt collar and pulling her face down to mine to lay one right on the lips should cause instant quiet and long therm being left alone-ness.
I might do the same. Or at least shove them or something. If she was farther away, it would be different, but you should never get that close to someone when waking them up.
The metaphysical imagery is particularly effective and it has interesting rhythmic devices, too, which seem to counterpoint the surrealism of the underlying metaphor of Vogonity.
I agree. In fact, if you deconstruct the post-feminist implications of the deconstruction of the poetry, an iconoclastic proto-Hungarian Dadaist theme is revealed.
Just one more dance, friend.
Just one more chance, friend:
One more chorus, one more tune.
It’s not the end, friend,
If you’re a friend, friend,
Then you’ll come back to me soon,
But it’s too late, pal,
To celebrate, pal.
You’ll have to wait, pal.
Don’t you cry.
Now, it’s goodnight, friend.
Goodnight friend.
Goodnight friend.
A couple hundred panels ago, she had an impromptu hook-up with a TA in a classroom after dragging him from his lecture. Lady goes through all the trouble of totally stripping down for a quickie. Even her hair gets undone. Guess what she leaves on?
He doesn’t want to wake up, maybe? It’s kind of a defence mechanism – I also sleep-punched my older brother in the face when he was shaking me to wake me up.
Probably what Drunken Nordmann said. I also talk in my sleep and had a mild case of sleepwalking when I was younger, so it just might be that sleep-me is unusually active.
Well, my grandmother was standing in the door of my bedroom going all, “John! It’s after 11! Get up!” and there was a mail coif in arm’s reach, so I threw it at her. Missed, fortunately.
I was imagining a loose pauldron or vambrace, myself. A helm’s a bit heavy for that, even if you manage to get some fingers hooked into the face grill.
The church i went to most of my life was 8:30 – 9:30. The next i know about was 10:30 – 11:30. The only other i have ever been to was 2:00-3:00. Churches keep weird hours.
They’re at church. That’s why Sal’s wearing her gloves. They just dressed her in her sleep, and they need her to wake up because the collection plate’s coming around.
Depends on where she goes. When I was Baptist, our Sunday meeting was only an hour long and we started at 10am. Some locations start at 9am. Other locations offered 9am, 10am, and 11am sermons.
My in-laws’ church (which sounds like the flavor of Christianity Joyce’s parents espouse) had a three- or four-hour-long Sunday meeting, including almost an hour of repetitious bombast from the preacher. (You’d think that when he went on that long, he’d accidentally wander a little further down the page and put the section he started with in the Bible into some sort of context, but somehow that never happened…)
I know! The gloves are Magic Straight Hair Gloves! The only time she didn’t wear them was when she saw her parents with curly hair!
That’s how it got straight again so fast! She just had to put them back on!
I wonder who it is. Sarah wouldn’t get involved in whatever Joyce wants (though I guess she’d know it would be entertaining to watch) and Billie wakes up after Sal.
“Christians hova’d ova me until I woke up, jus’ to use chloroform on me and put me unda again.” “That’s terrible!” “Nah, what’s terrible is sometimes it was a pillow.”
…I’m reminded of the wonderfully therapeutic scene involving a Vulcan and a (afterwards revealed to be) holodeck version of Neelix in the Star Trek: Voyager series.
Pleasant. Unfortunate if Joyce died or lost consciousness, but ‘leaving a mark’ up to ‘vision going dark’ would seem appropriate.
Ahh, the dangers of assuming you know what’s best, and that what’s not important to you shouldn’t be important to other people.
Well in all honesty out of both parents, Sal’s mother deserves it more!
…doesn’t mean some sense couldn’t be knocked into her father while she’s at it!
I’ve been reading DoA for more than year, and I’ve just come to the startling realization that I am suddenly and irrevocably farther into my college experience than the characters are. I’m 8 weeks into my first year at college, I started reading DoA as a high school junior, and by the time the DoA characters are 8 weeks into their freshman year, I’ll probably be a college junior. Not that any of you should care; it’s just some weird sort of milestone for me.
I remember one time I was watching Evangelion with some friends and one of them came to the crushing realization that he is now older than Misato (I’m not there quite yet thankfully)
Perhaps she’s constantly washing and santising off-“camera”…
But yeah, this reminds me that I really, really, really need to figure out how to wash my bike jacket. After some of the heat we had this summer, the thing absolutely reeks. Went out for a short test ride on the repaired machine late last night – in Britain, in late october, in what rapidly turned into howling wind and driving rain – and when I got back in and dekitted the stench had already transferred itself to my other clothes despite there not being a drop of sweat on me.
Protip: Sleeping in your motorcycle gloves both sames the time of looking for them and putting them on in the morning AND protects your hands from damage when you feel the need to choke the living crap out of whomever might wake you up before you’re ready.
But if her religion is right, she will go to Heaven, and you know what she can do from Heaven? She can send messages directly into your brain that tell you what the right thing to do is, which will include waking up at nine, and they will be on repeat because she is Joyce. And she will be able to do it to everyone she knew at once. And you can’t murder away instant brain messages.
No, Sal! Get your hands off of poor Joyce and find your own submissive lesbian to fondle as a way of sticking it to your neglectful parents.
Besides, Joyce is all Dorothy’s, any comments she may have made to your bike, your hair, and how she wanted to be you or in your skin can be totally ignored as her pre-Dorothy phase.
Anyway, Billi’s the one that tried to kiss you while your back was turned and dreams of you in a jumpsuit.
It probably doesn’t help that this is the only one of Willis’s comics I’ve read, but I reeeeaally don’t like Sal right now. 🙁 It’s probably to do with the fact she takes her anger and stress out on other people instead of dealing with it. Reminds me of awful people I’ve had to deal with at home and at an old job.
That is normally how people deal with stuff, by taking it out on others. Later they might understand the source of their issues, but it takes a further stage to deal with it, if they ever do.
However, Joyce is violating personal space and generally assumes people want to deal with her stuff. She’s gone into Sal/Billie’s room before uninvited to wake up Billie.
Sticking your face into somebody else’s is kind of asking for it.
BAD SAL. NO KILLING FRIENDS.
Also Joyce, that’s the worst way in the world to wake someone up. You hovered over Sal’s face while she was barely waking up, SCARING THE SHIT OUT OF HER. (possibly) What did you expect? This is Sal we’re dealing with not Becky.
Loading ...
SAL!
JOYCE!
Rutherford B. Hays!
MENDOZA!
McBain!
Adolphe Menjou!
AAAAAAAAALVIIIIIIN
TETSUOOOOOOOOO!!!!
KAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHNNNNN!!!!!!
KANEDAAAAAAA!!!!
KANEDAAAAAAAAAA!!!!
LEEEROOOY JEEENNNKINS
LOUD NOISES!
Mr. Beardsley? Chief?! McCloud!
LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNNAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
KAAAAAHHHHNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
MAC FRY!!!
JET-SOOOOON!!
SUSAN B. ANTHONY!!!!!
GAAAAAARRRRFFIIIIIIIIIEEEEEELLLLLD!!!
KAMEHAMEHAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!
C-c-c-combo breaker!!!
DONKEY!
SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE!!!!!!
Clearly I overestimated the width of the comment field. Let me try again.
*ahem*
SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE!!!
Smitty Werbenjagermanjensen!
WIIIIIILMAAAAAA!!!
LIIIIIIINNNNNNNKKKKKKK!!!!
HEYYY!!!!
LIISSTTTEEEENNN!!!
Rocky!
STELLLLA!!!!
Rose…bud…
ADRIAAAANNN
Nora!
COBRAAAAAAA!!
(I must be old, I couldn’t believe nobody did that one…)
EMILIO!
Lana. LANA. LANNNNNNNNNNNNAAAAAAAAAA
Danger zone.
Rocky!
Bueller. Bueller.
…
Bueller.
AAAADRIIIAAAAAANNNN!
LOUD NOISES!!!!!!!
SCOTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!
LEEEEEEEEROOOOOOOOOOY WIIIIIILIIIIIIIIIAMSON
SCORES OCCASIONALLY
FREEEEEDOOOOM!!!
YOU’RE GEORGE BERNARD SHAW!
DINKLEBERG!
FAMOUS MOVIE QUOTE!
Lucita Toelle ul-Laputa?
Ralph Waldo Emersooon!
RALPH WALDO PICKLECHIPS!
… I don’t know him.
Jacob McCandless.
. . . Bob Dole?
I’m jus- I’m- I’ll go now.
James Baxter!
JAKODAAAA!!!!!!!!!!
Gary?
Ralph Waldo Pickle Chips
i dunno him :<
John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt
that’s my name too!
It used to be my name too, but I had to change it because of the people always shouting, whenever I went out.
His name was Robert Paulson. His name was Robert Paulson. His name was Robert Paulson.
His name was Agent Coulson. His name was Agent Coulson. His name was Agent Coulson.
Smitty Werbenjagermanjensen
IT WAS HIS HAT, MR KRABS. HE WAS NUMBER ONE!
KHAAAAAAAAAAN!
Edward Wong Hau Pepelu Tivrusky the 4th!
The Undertaker?
WAZOWSKI!
ED! and Ein.
Valentinez Alkalinella Xifax Sicidabohertz Gombigobella Blue Stradivari Talentrent Pierre Andre Charton-Haymoss Ivanovicci Baldeus George Doitzel Kaiser the 3rd
Bonzu Pippinpaddleopsicopolis the Third !
IT’S A GUNDAM!
It’s Godzilla!
This is no Zaku, boy! No Zaku!
Albus… Percival… Wulfric… Brian… Dumbledore.
“It’s a very long name.”
CUUUUUUUUUUTTTTTT!!! CUUUUUUUUUTTTTTTT!!!
BOOOOOOOYYYYYLE!
DR. SCOTT!
JANET!
ROCKY!
BRAD!
Bullwinkle!
Grunt!
All present and accounted for, Mister President, SIR!
Charrrlllleeeeyyy-
That kills people.
MAMAAAAAAAAAAA JUST KILLLEEED MAAAN
oops, didn’t see you already did that one.. wasn’t trying to copy you AH, sorry
S’alright. I did the same thing lower down. Can’t be helped with the odd formatting.
Harvey Manfrenjinsinjen
“Girl with Triangle Grin!”
SNAAAAAAAAAAAKE!
LIQUIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIID!!!!
OCELOOOOOOT!!!
BadgerBadgerBadgerBadgerBadgerBadgerBadgerBadgerBadgerBadgerBadgerBadger Mushroom Mushroom!
KAGOOOMEEEE!!!!
SPARTAAAAA!
gaaaamzeeeeeeee
OYAJIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!
Bueller?
Bueller?
…Bueller?
GREAT SCOTT!
SASUKE!!!!!
Ichigo!!!!
SHARROONNN!
DOC! TOR! WHO!
Good lord what have I unleashed on this page.
hey don’t take all the credit
SARAH!!!!!
SAIIIITOOOO!
Rrrk-uleess!
RRREEEEEDDDWWWWAAAAALLLLL!!!!
JOHN JACOB JINGLEHIEMERSMITH
Sal is not a morning person
At least she didn’t have an empty bottle to shove in Joyce’s neck.
I think she could borrow one from Billie, she might have one in stock.
Joyce, stop doing that.
Nobody likes morning breath.
NO ONE STOPS THE ONE WITH THE TRIANGLE SMILE!
Joyce just became more terrifying. Thanks for that.
Joyce has always been terrifying.
Run for your lives!!!! Joyce is destroying Tokyo!
JUST GET IN THE EFFING ROBOT, AMBER
But I don’t wanna!
DO IT, OR THE KITTEN GETS IT!
Joyce is the one who knocks.
She will knock four times.
Those bicyclist Mormons never give up.
…I just imagined Joyce, exactly as overzealous as she was in the beginning… but Mormon instead.
…I have no idea why I find this idea so hilarious.
Using that logic, Calvin would be an invincible child-god
It’s about time you figured that out!
NOON? deserved it
Joyce should know better, getting up before 2 on a weekend is blasphemy.
Thats a choker…
Well, sal might’ve just given Joyce her first fetish.
Joyce’s first fetish was Sal’s Hair. Her second was Sal’s bike. 3rd was Billie’s boobs. 4th is Sal’s hand.
Joyce’s developing quite a number of Rule 36s in such a short time.
That’s the genderbending rule isn’t it? The porn rule’s another one.
Rule 63: “For any given male character, there is a female version of that character.”
Rule 36: “If it exists, someone has a fetish for it. No exceptions.”
So out there somewhere is a person turned on by dandruff flakes?
I could swear that it was the rule 34
No, Rule 34 means there’s just porn of it. 36 has to do with people liking said porn.
Shouldn’t the porn rule come after the fetish rule? That seems more accurate from a cause-effect standpoint, to me.
But not all fetishes are sexual/pornographic in nature, just as not all porn is fetish-specific.
Rule 34: There is porn of it. No exceptions.
Rule 35: If there is no porn of it, it will be created so as to appear that it has always been there.
Rule 36: If it exists (and of course it exists – see rules 34 and 35), someone has a fetish for it. No exceptions.
Rule 63: For every character there exists an opposite-gender counterpart. Only exception is if the male character is so androgynous that the female character would be no different.
And I think, with the introduction of Joshua/Jocelyne, that Willis has covered all four of these.
BOOOOOO!
Looks like a normal morning to me…
Yeah, that’s totally me in the mornings too. Noon is way too early to see a cheerful face.
cheerful face? noon is too early to see *any* face.
A marijuana chapter?
And now, a Very Special DoA…..
Hosted by Snoop Dog.
Don’t you mean Snoop Lion?
He goes by Snoopzilla now, thank you very much.
No today its…
Snoop Llama
Whoops forgot I can’t use those “”
we missed the spinning Snoop Wheel
The gloves would seem to indicate this is Sal she’s waking up. But isn’t her roommate Sarah?
Who wears gloves to bed?
Also their rooms are linked by the halfbath.
I’m convinced that they aren’t gloves. Her hands just look like that. 😉
Blue tattoos.
With special effect shading so it looks textured and 3D.
Compliments to the artist!
They do share a bathroom which connects them together.
The tag indicates it as well
Maybe she’s in the hallway, and just rage-quit after her fight with her brother and didn’t go back to the room?
…I’ve never heard “rage-quit” in that context before…I like it.
I had a friend who was an insomniac, and before I knew that about him I would always ask “When do you sleep?” and he’d always reply “I don’t sleep, I just rage-quit for a few hours.”
I soon found this to be more fact than fiction…
I can’t imagine falling asleep while angry. Doesn’t seem very effective.
Sarah doesn’t strangle, she hits people with a baseball bat.
Because she sleeps with her baseball bat.
Any smart college student should always sleep with a weapon. A dormitory is nothing more than a madhouse for violent post-pubescent teens. Monsters under the bed indeed.
A smarter/stupider college student would’ve just place anti-personnel mines at the door.
But if you’re an alcoholic, which way do you point the “face this end toward the enemy” side? YOU ARE YOUR OWN ENEMY
She did. She just forgot to mine the half-bath, too.
She’s done this to Billie, and she’s not her roommate either.
I don’t get the alt text. Like…I understand the reference, but I don’t get the context.
What’s it say? Can’t see it on phone
YOU HAVE ALTERED THE DEAL. PRAY I DO NOT ALTER IT FURTHER.
My guess would be that Joyce just altered Sal’s expectations of when she’s supposed to be waken up, and now Sal may alter the deal further by re-arranging Joyce’s perky face
Darth Vader, speaking to Lando Calrissian. Empire Strikes Back. Ring a bell?
“I understand the reference, but I don’t get the context.”
It’s the choking thing. Choking = Vader = quote. Don’t overthink it.
Not to be “that guy”, but what Vader actually said was “I am altering the deal. Pray I do not alter it further.” Could be that Willis misremembered the quote, or it could be that he’s altering the quote for his purposes (in which case we should perhaps pray he doesn’t alter it further).
See my analysis above.
If figure either I’m right or we’re obsessing over a typo.
Darth Vader and Lando Calrissian (spelling?) in “Empire Strikes Back”. Also a reference to Vader “force-choking” one of his subordinates in the original “Star Wars”.
Alright, so it WAS just a loose joke. I was just wondering cuz I don’t remember Vader choking Lando in that scene.
He didn’t. I’m pretty sure the choking was to reinforce the reference.
Well, as he turned away, Lando was rubbing his neck, so…
Not like she could find Joyce’s LACK of faith disturbing.
Now if there was lack of *pants* …
I seem to remember Joyce not being allowed to wake someone up but I thought it was Billie not Sal
It’s nice to see how similar the roomies are.
SNUFF!
Hope you enjoyed Joyce up til now cuz she’s gone now.
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooooooooo
Perfect grav for that comment!
And just after we lost Ruth over in the reprinting of Roomies.
Oh Shit! Joyce No!!!
Good old Star Wars references!
Die, morning people.
I take offense to that
And I take offense to your morningness, so we’re even.
Perfect facial expression on your avatar for this type of comment.
And die BEFORE you reach my bedside.
Seconded. Morning is just not right.
“The morning people” indeed. Anybody that speaks German can’t be /that/ bad.
Hört, hört!
You know who else spoke German? Hitler.
On the other hand, so did J.R.R Tolkien, so that helps balance things out.
Well, yes. Sideshow Bob’s repeated attempts to kill Bart were totally just wacky hijinks.
Third.
I second the motion!
Whoops! Should have read further, so fourthed.
Darth Sal
Is Sal the master or the apprentice?
She’s clearly the Mandalorian.
You mean Midichlorian right???
How dare you mention those parasites! They are not the source of the Force; they are drawn to it like moths to a flame!
(As a side effect, however, they seem to retard aging.)
I like you
FINISH HER!!!
FRIENDSHIP
FRIENDSHIP? AGAIN?
OF COURSE, BECAUSE IT’S MAGIC!!!
This response confuses me.
In Mortal Kombat II, new ways of defeating an opponent were added. One of them was Friendship, where you would make friends with your opponent.
I figured someone would post FAINTALITY before me so I wrote the one everyone forgets
Is that Nanoha Befriending? I.e. blasting them into submission while asking them to talk to you?
YOU FRIENDSHIP IS MATCH AGAINST THE MIGHT OF THE ORDO MALLEUS.
IT’LL TAKE MORE THAN YOUR PUNY ORDO MALLEUS TO STOP DEVASTATOR!
I would have gone with BABALITY myself.
KILL JOY!
HULK SMASH PUNY GALACTUS!
Someone strangled The One with The Triangle Smile?
Bout Time!
Did You Just Choke Cthulhu?
Cthulhu can not be choked, he has 10,653 windpipes. Also 62 sets of gills.
What if I have 10, 654 hands?
Gills remember? Anyways he doesn’t need to breath, he uses the windpipes as built in bagpipes.
Knowing Cthulhu, his windpipes sound like bagpipes.
The sound is similar to 400 of most mind numbing, terrifying bagpipes you have ever heard each playing a separate song all at once.
So – Scottish bagpipes?
My imagination’s too good for my own good. ARGH they won’t STOP
Drunken Nordmann +1
Ah sleep wit ma glubs on for jus such’n a’mergency.
Sal throws Joyce onto the asphyxiated pile of those who dared to wake her.
So, you’re not from the South, huh?
Nova Scotia is such a lonely place…
Anne of Green Gables! (I know, I’m sorry…)
PEI…?
Yes! (That *is* in N.S., right??)
Heh, no. Prince Edward Island is its own tiny province.
Damn! No wonder Nova Scotia is such a lonely place . . .
It’s because no sane Canadian likes Nova Scotia…Prince Edward Island is where they would rather be. 😛
But they’re both Maritime provinces!
That’s like saying that both Texas and Florida are Gulf states.
Welllll they’re much closer geographically. All of the Maritime provinces (minus Newfoundland & Labrador), including the water between them, would fit nicely in any non-Martime province.
A closer analogy would be saying they’re both New England states?
I have heard it said (by a resident of the Niagara region), that a Prince Edward Islander was a “Newfie” who was going to Toronto but ran out of money.
…So did Sal drink herself to sleep, too?
“WHO DARES DISRURB MY SLUMBER?”
WHO DISTURBS MY PLASMA BATH?
Your Doctor.
Doctor who?
Exactly.
hue hue hue
Throat hugs for everyone!
I don’t know what context I would be able to use that phrase in, but I am determined to find one now.
You win the comments.
Do you really need a hand for a “throat hug” though?
Not if you’re Darth Sal.
I’m calling panel three “so close and yet so far”.
Second.
Motion carries. All in favor?
Lol, took me a bit to get that
Wearing gloves to beds keeps your hands clean and healthy. Alternatively: Sal is a crazy person who wears gloves in bed.
Those are her lotion gloves (they exist… Seriously)
She’s hiding her mechanical hands.
Turns out Sal is a a Terminator…who knew?
Or she’s actually Rider Man.
Oh! Even better!
Well we can honestly say that Joyce has done fucked up.
I now like Sal so much more after this strip.
Screw morning people.
but it literally isn’t morning
Screw “In your face as soon as you wake up” people.
Basically screw people.
I am Sal. And Mike.
Sarah can get on board with that, too, I think.
But it’s morning people who think noon is too late to still be sleeping.
hey i hate mornings but i cant fathom how someone can normally sleep in that late
If you didn’t get to sleep until 5 in the morning, sleeping til after noon is quite easy.
Great minds, Plasma . . .
What time are you assuming she went to sleep? (This is Sal, remember…)
For all we know, she may have only went to bed a couple of hours ago.,
I know we’re not supposed to make these jokes anymore, but ….
“In yesterday’s strip we saw Sal was vigilanting all night. She didn’t go to bed before sunrise.”
AARRRGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!
Seeing by your avatar you already received the requisite beating for your insolence. Any more of that tho and we’ll turn you over to Sal’s glove.
So this is how Joyce dies.
Or this is how we discover she’s a Highlander.
Nah, she’ll just get choked out, Sal will go back to sleep then wake up before Joyce does and return the bad in your face wake-up. Pass-out induced headaches are rather like hangover ones.
Not with a bang but with a sal
Oh no joyce is choking quick billie do CPR.
Kind of funny considering your gravatar.
That would be my reaction as well.
Also Joyce needs to learn about personal space.
If I saw that first thing in the morning I would punch her. Joyce is creepy!
Also, nothing is worse when waking up than energetic bubbly people.
I am not the the one to condone violence so punching is right out.
Now grabbing her by the shirt collar and pulling her face down to mine to lay one right on the lips should cause instant quiet and long therm being left alone-ness.
It wouldn’t be an intentional punch. More of a knee-jerk reaction.
I might do the same. Or at least shove them or something. If she was farther away, it would be different, but you should never get that close to someone when waking them up.
The name of the storyline implies that David Willis is now a My CHemical Romance fan.
I am disapoint.
OOPS SOMEONE GOT DROPPED INTO THE SPAM FILTER
Guess today we’ve learned another thing not to accuse Willis of in the comments.
WILLIS DON’T TAKE NO SHIT
E’ERYBODY GET DOWN ON YOUR KNEES.
I’m loving how your first strip after what was probably your darkest DoA Storyline starts with a black panel and ends with someone getting choked.
Darkest story line *to date*…….
There’s Amber’s dad and a date-rapist out there somewhere.
Amber’s dad was IN that last storyline.
But not the rapist.
Or therapist.
What? It’s a good song 🙂
i know i play it in my car constantly
Probably my favorite off of that album. Don’t worry about the haters Willis, you just gotta do you bro XD
Hm that may explain a whole lot of things….
I feel sad now…
Aw, don’t fret. I’m sure he was joking.
If he actually put you in the spam filter, your parents would disown you and your reflection would hide itself in shame.
And be forced to listen to Vogon poetry.
Vogon Poetry isn’t that bad.
The metaphysical imagery is particularly effective and it has interesting rhythmic devices, too, which seem to counterpoint the surrealism of the underlying metaphor of Vogonity.
No, you’re completely wrong. Vogon poetry is only written in order to throw the author’s mean, callous, heartless exterior into sharp relief.
Again the avatar is apropos. Vogon poetry is like a punch to the temple, or several, in an odd timing.
I agree. In fact, if you deconstruct the post-feminist implications of the deconstruction of the poetry, an iconoclastic proto-Hungarian Dadaist theme is revealed.
Well then… I suppose it’s so long and good night for Super Duper, eh…?
Just one more dance, friend.
Just one more chance, friend:
One more chorus, one more tune.
It’s not the end, friend,
If you’re a friend, friend,
Then you’ll come back to me soon,
But it’s too late, pal,
To celebrate, pal.
You’ll have to wait, pal.
Don’t you cry.
Now, it’s goodnight, friend.
Goodnight friend.
Goodnight friend.
Right in the feels man. I will let my love of MCR go, my love of the Star Wars Christmas special is too great.
I like that Sal apparently sleeps in her gloves. Power move.
I love Sal. She’s so bad.
Her Power Gloves.
They’re so rad.
It’s so bad.
Now that’s just sad.
It’ll drive me mad!
I’m getting Glad and throwing this thread in the trash.
That’d be too bad
I’d be so sad
I might get mad
I’d call my dad!
That’d be too bad.
That’d be too bad?
That’d be too bad.
A couple hundred panels ago, she had an impromptu hook-up with a TA in a classroom after dragging him from his lecture. Lady goes through all the trouble of totally stripping down for a quickie. Even her hair gets undone. Guess what she leaves on?
Socks. She leaves on her socks.
Right?
You. I like you.
Of course; she’d been listening to Roz and was practicing safe sox.
Your wit sox, but I garter go
They are like socks for her hands …
That’s the scene I was thinking of also.
(No glove, no love.)
DAMN YOU WILLIS!!
You said you weren’t going to kill anyone off in this strip!!
He didn’t say anything about life threatening situations.
Also she’s not dead, she’s dying. Two different things.
But you can only die for so long before you’re dead.
Not as long as you stock up on the 1UPs.
People die when they are killed.
People dye when they want to change their hair colour.
I thought people died when they wanted to figure out their character stats…
Isn’t it, people diet when they wanna lose weight?
No, that’s just how they roll.
Yeah, no shit there, Shirou.
Sal killed Joyce. TO DEATH!
Don’t you mean: Salk killed Joyce. Sal killed Joyce TO DEATH!
A true man never dies when he’s killed. ◥▶◀◤
Kamina?
Excellent Unicode art!
You can only live so long until you’re dead.
I declare your point meaningless! HA!
“That which kills you makes you stronger … as Undead.”
Ah, but did he say anything about near-fatal neck groping?
“Neck groping” … that’s almost as good as Shaith coining “throat hugs”.
She’s not dead yet.
Joyce said “Geez.” Isn’t that like, proto-blasphemy?
It’s blasphemous according to my mom.
For a nickel?
Nope.
The last panel reminds me of the time I punched my mom in the face when she tried to wake me up for church. Good times.
I was still asleep when I punched her for the record.
Did you still have to go?
That seems like something you should pray away.
Yes, unfortunately.
Oh wow, I have so many questions now, but first and foremost is: What did she do after that?
According to her she fell backwards a bit, stayed back, and then she said my name to wake me up.
Funnily enough, it’s not the only time that I’ve sleep-punched someone who tried to wake me up. Sleeping me is violent.
Wow. Is there a reason for you being sleep-punch happy?
He doesn’t want to wake up, maybe? It’s kind of a defence mechanism – I also sleep-punched my older brother in the face when he was shaking me to wake me up.
Probably what Drunken Nordmann said. I also talk in my sleep and had a mild case of sleepwalking when I was younger, so it just might be that sleep-me is unusually active.
(Also I’m a girl for the record).
I administered a palm strike to a drill instructor’s head while asleep. The sound of the other DI laughing his ass off woke me up.
I threw armor at my grandmother when she tried to wake me up once. I’m an asshole when woken prematurely.
Throwing armor? That is a visual that cries out for further explanation.
Well, my grandmother was standing in the door of my bedroom going all, “John! It’s after 11! Get up!” and there was a mail coif in arm’s reach, so I threw it at her. Missed, fortunately.
Of course; how silly of me. EVERYONE has a coif within arm’s reach of their bed.
I was imagining a loose pauldron or vambrace, myself. A helm’s a bit heavy for that, even if you manage to get some fingers hooked into the face grill.
(Almost ten years in the SCA, why do you ask?)
21-plus, myself.
Does Sal have to choke a bongo? Cause Sal will choke a bongo.
You’re gonna make Sal Walkerton get out of this bed and choke a bongo.
You are making me laugh against my wishes. That’s +2 internets, -1 internet. Only 1 internet for you two. You’ll have to share.
Hunger Games.
If it is Sunday and it is noon, wouldn’t Joyce still be at church?
Maybe it’s a late service.
Or early service.
The church i went to most of my life was 8:30 – 9:30. The next i know about was 10:30 – 11:30. The only other i have ever been to was 2:00-3:00. Churches keep weird hours.
I asked because when I used to have to go to church, the main service was from 10:30 to 12:00.
The only ones I’ve ever been to go from 10 to 11.
I guess every denomination has its own time frames.
Or it could be her church has multiple services, like mine.
First of all, she would have gone to church and gotten back already.
Second, what type of service does a home-schooled fundie go to anyway?
If I recall correctly, Joyce and her family still went to their local church before she started IU.
Nondenominational.
They’re at church. That’s why Sal’s wearing her gloves. They just dressed her in her sleep, and they need her to wake up because the collection plate’s coming around.
in my own experience usually there is an early and late mass and even then late mass lets out at or a little before noon
Don’t do it Sal! It’ll only make Walky happy!
No cause Walky is looking forward to Dorothy/Joyce action.
Depends on where she goes. When I was Baptist, our Sunday meeting was only an hour long and we started at 10am. Some locations start at 9am. Other locations offered 9am, 10am, and 11am sermons.
So, really, it all depends on where she goes.
My in-laws’ church (which sounds like the flavor of Christianity Joyce’s parents espouse) had a three- or four-hour-long Sunday meeting, including almost an hour of repetitious bombast from the preacher. (You’d think that when he went on that long, he’d accidentally wander a little further down the page and put the section he started with in the Bible into some sort of context, but somehow that never happened…)
“I’m confused. Is this really happening or are you just happy to see me?”
Does Sal Walkerton have to choke a bongo?
Does a fundie got to sue a bongo?
Is she seriously trying to wake up Sal? She deserves to be choke holded into unconsciousness. How on earth did she think that was a good idea?
Also, Sal wears her motorcycle gloves to bed?
So? Liquid Snake walks around Alaska with just a trench coat…so Sal going to bed with gloves on is no surprise to me.
Exactly…it’s like Proto Man and alway wearing sunglasses.
He probably wears them at night too!
I know! The gloves are Magic Straight Hair Gloves! The only time she didn’t wear them was when she saw her parents with curly hair!
That’s how it got straight again so fast! She just had to put them back on!
They only look like her motorcycle gloves. They’re actually her coughing gloves for these type of occasions.
And whoever Joyce is talking to just stands by as she is choked to death…
Can you blame them?
I wonder who it is. Sarah wouldn’t get involved in whatever Joyce wants (though I guess she’d know it would be entertaining to watch) and Billie wakes up after Sal.
Yeah. I’m wondering who she’s talking to and what possible reason could Joyce have that’d make her risk death by Sal.
To be fair, I doubt Joyce learned much from her encounter with sleeping Billie. At the very least probably didn’t think to extrapolate from that.
Turns out she was smarter two weeks ago.
Well, it’s called Dumbing of Age for a reason.
Don’t get too shocked Sal or you might have to book another appointment at the hairdressers.
I don’t think they’re just standing there…
Fap
Fap
Fap
Oh hey Joyce, don’t wake up Sal
RRRRK
Goddamnit
Now that’s the sal we all know and love
your grav just lit up.
She always has an after mayhem cig.
Homicidal is a loveable trait?
yes.
That would be my exact reaction. Unless it’s the apocalypse or the house is on fire, YOU DO NOT WAKE ME. Heads will roll.
Or various other emergencies.
Or if the apocalypse is on fire.
Or if the apocalypse is on the house.
The apocalypse is calling from inside the house!
i can’t stop laughing at that last panel.
come on joyce just keep on poking the bear i’m sure nothing bad will happen
“What ah ya doin’ hov’ring ova me in mah sleep?!”
Sal’s accent becomes 10x more thick in the morning.
Strangulation should not make me laugh this much.
“Christians hova’d ova me until I woke up, jus’ to use chloroform on me and put me unda again.” “That’s terrible!” “Nah, what’s terrible is sometimes it was a pillow.”
You know, I was expecting that scene from Beyond Thunderdome.
The Joyce alarm clock does have a snooze button, better known as the carotid arteries.
:^)
…I’m reminded of the wonderfully therapeutic scene involving a Vulcan and a (afterwards revealed to be) holodeck version of Neelix in the Star Trek: Voyager series.
Pleasant. Unfortunate if Joyce died or lost consciousness, but ‘leaving a mark’ up to ‘vision going dark’ would seem appropriate.
Ahh, the dangers of assuming you know what’s best, and that what’s not important to you shouldn’t be important to other people.
Dawn of the Second Day!!! (in story)
thiiiiiisssssss
No, Sal! Save that sweet, sweet choking rage for your parents! YOUR PARENTS, SAL!
Or Walky.
Why not both?
only two hands?
Well in all honesty out of both parents, Sal’s mother deserves it more!
…doesn’t mean some sense couldn’t be knocked into her father while she’s at it!
And then…Joyce died.
The End.
She’ll come back as a zombie.
Dear Joyce: Even if you do not believe in natural selection, natural selection still believes in you.
We need a strip entitled “I Don’t Like Mondays” with the alt-text “And the silicon chip inside her head gets switched to overload….”
Just sayin’. Maybe early next year when the next day hits.
I’ve been reading DoA for more than year, and I’ve just come to the startling realization that I am suddenly and irrevocably farther into my college experience than the characters are. I’m 8 weeks into my first year at college, I started reading DoA as a high school junior, and by the time the DoA characters are 8 weeks into their freshman year, I’ll probably be a college junior. Not that any of you should care; it’s just some weird sort of milestone for me.
I remember one time I was watching Evangelion with some friends and one of them came to the crushing realization that he is now older than Misato (I’m not there quite yet thankfully)
Wait, she sleeps in her bike gloves? That shit can’t be comfortable.
It keeps your hands warmer!
Why would Sal want tot warm tahrey’s hands?
I don’t know, but I think I’d probably allow it anyway.
She wears those gloves constantly. Her hands must be the smelliest things ever.
Perhaps she’s constantly washing and santising off-“camera”…
But yeah, this reminds me that I really, really, really need to figure out how to wash my bike jacket. After some of the heat we had this summer, the thing absolutely reeks. Went out for a short test ride on the repaired machine late last night – in Britain, in late october, in what rapidly turned into howling wind and driving rain – and when I got back in and dekitted the stench had already transferred itself to my other clothes despite there not being a drop of sweat on me.
Now imagine that all over your hands, ew.
(The gloves are rather easier to clean)
YES!
No! Bad Sal! Put Joyce down!
Noon? Filthy casuals. I can go until 4.
4? Filthy poser. I can go until 12:00 midnight of the next day.
Fool, I’m still asleep while I type this!
And thus Sal is slowly growing to be my favourite character.
That’s IT! I’ve had it with your perk, enthusiasm and good nature. DIE! DIE! DIE!
Oh. Sorry. Is there any coffee?
Darth Sal indeed!
“I find your lack of faith disturbing.”
THE NEW DOA BOOK HAS STARTED! THE NEW DOA BOOK HAS STARTED!
“Good, good…let the hate flow through you.”
Okay, based on the title of the new story (“The Only Dope For Me Is You”), I have to assume this storyline is going to be about teens doing drugs.
Another strip to relaunch a thousand ships!
Would it be the SS Soyce or SS Jal?
U.S.S JoySal
Protip: Sleeping in your motorcycle gloves both sames the time of looking for them and putting them on in the morning AND protects your hands from damage when you feel the need to choke the living crap out of whomever might wake you up before you’re ready.
*saves. It’s too damn early to be typing on teh interwebs.
And no one ever heard of her again
Murdering Joyce will solve nothing Sal.
It’ll solve Joyce waking people up early on the weekends.
But if her religion is right, she will go to Heaven, and you know what she can do from Heaven? She can send messages directly into your brain that tell you what the right thing to do is, which will include waking up at nine, and they will be on repeat because she is Joyce. And she will be able to do it to everyone she knew at once. And you can’t murder away instant brain messages.
I’m not all that familiar with nondenominational doctrines, but I’m pretty sure that’s not how Heaven works…
How would you know? Were you there?
Plot twist: Jury said her actions were completely justifiable.
If I saw that in front of me, I’d probably get angry. Not enough to strangle her though.
Not being fully awake at the time would also be a defense.
No, Sal! Get your hands off of poor Joyce and find your own submissive lesbian to fondle as a way of sticking it to your neglectful parents.
Besides, Joyce is all Dorothy’s, any comments she may have made to your bike, your hair, and how she wanted to be you or in your skin can be totally ignored as her pre-Dorothy phase.
Anyway, Billi’s the one that tried to kiss you while your back was turned and dreams of you in a jumpsuit.
“oh, sorry Joyce I thought you were an alien”
It probably doesn’t help that this is the only one of Willis’s comics I’ve read, but I reeeeaally don’t like Sal right now. 🙁 It’s probably to do with the fact she takes her anger and stress out on other people instead of dealing with it. Reminds me of awful people I’ve had to deal with at home and at an old job.
Then you should read all It’s Walky, You will really “like” Sal there.
shudder
MWAHAHAHA!
(but seriously, it’s a great run)
“In this vision, how many arms did you have?”
All of them. All of the AAAAAAAARMS!
And did you have an Irons in the Fire m8
That is normally how people deal with stuff, by taking it out on others. Later they might understand the source of their issues, but it takes a further stage to deal with it, if they ever do.
However, Joyce is violating personal space and generally assumes people want to deal with her stuff. She’s gone into Sal/Billie’s room before uninvited to wake up Billie.
Sticking your face into somebody else’s is kind of asking for it.
It’s normally how people who hurt others deal with stuff. A lot of people deal with their problems with taking it out on other people.
BAD SAL!
-the-only-dope-for-me-is-you
Seems legit.
Now Joyce is into being choke
BAD SAL. NO KILLING FRIENDS.
Also Joyce, that’s the worst way in the world to wake someone up. You hovered over Sal’s face while she was barely waking up, SCARING THE SHIT OUT OF HER. (possibly) What did you expect? This is Sal we’re dealing with not Becky.
Goodbye Joyce, we hardly knew you.
Get hyped for next week when we meet our new replacement regular cast member Jocelyn! WIIGII!
My name is Sal Walkerton. You interrupted my sleep. PREPARE TO DIE.
Nyeeehehehehehehehehe.