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Joey Mallone: “Looks like some kind of torture device.”
Never thought I’d see a reference to the Blackwell games on here. Well done.
Bullet dodged, I guess.
When I get to the bottom, I go back to the top of the slide.
Where I stop, and I turn, and I go for a ride
Helter Skelter was apparently a fairground slide built around a tower.
I can’t believe Charles Manson lied to me
I can’t believe he co-wrote a Beach Boys song.
Still are, and you can hire ones here in the UK for as little as £1500.
Fine, or get a metric buttload of McNuggets if you prefer.
joe performs a flirt
Not effectively. Now is the time to ask Joyce if she is ticklish.
That’s not flirting, that’s a declaration of war.
Or zurber. Could be zurber time.
Is there a conspiracy here to melt me or something aaaaaaaaah
🫠
Joyce, maybe you should start with old fashioned, sitting-on-the-floor situps?
i imagine she wanted to try out smoe of hte equipment but maybe she could do jump ropes or so if they have it
Or easy mode, elevated situps?
This does seem way too extreme for someone not used to working out.
Yeah, I don’t want to interrupt Joe in the middle of a wholesome flirt but he knows this. But it’s cute to see him do this.
I don’t blame her–those things always terrified me
adorbable. the slope is adjustable though right?
It is. Currently set to K2 mode.
What is K2 mode?
I presume he means K2 here as in the second tallest mountain on Earth. That angle is steeper than I’ve ever seen one rated to be safely used at, and normally rather than a steeper incline beyond maybe 25 to 30 degrees you just add weight to the movement.
Joyce is using dangerous recreational drugs.
Not that I’m aware of, this is a Roman Chair, as one commenter put it an instrument of torture.
Thats the worst thing that’s ever happened to Joyce?
It’s quite fun if, in that situation, you sit up and throw a quick left-right combination
Well fun might be stretching it a bit…
“Was never a slide?!” Such paucity of imagination, Joe. Where is your vision, your wonder? God, it’s a good thing your handsome.
they need to find an adult theme park to play around in if not just like an indoor rock climbing thing if she might have with that
I thought “adult theme park” was the name of Joe’s dorm room
definitely an E-ticket
–Dave, Joe: Earth girls / Earth girls are ea-sy
Adorkable
Yeah, I have no clue how the fuck I’d get down either.
well i imagine you’d need a partner to help out but yeah i imagine itd be hard to descend on ur own
Simplicity itself. You just release your legs from where they are hooked and fall on your head.
I said it was simple; I didn’t say it was a good idea.
Due to reasons my girlfriend-now-wife was on a pony (so was I) and she was not enjoying it at all and asked how do you get off and I said “fall” and then she did?! but fortunately not far and to this day I’m all NOT LITERALLY in my head every time I remember it xD
Well, I figure you’d slide down the backrest rather than falling, but you’d still hit your head at the bottom. Not too bad, but not exactly good either.
It’s not that high. Take your legs out and you can get down. If you’re worried about your head, put your arms behind you first.
You can prop yourself with your arms and unhook your legs by the looks of it. I’ve never tried it but looks like it’d be simple enough, well for someone in shape.
First, you sit up and then grab the top so you can unhook your legs.
Oh wait, I see the problem.
Yes, exercising is definitely worse than being kidnapped by a murderous supervillain.
What you said, but without the sarcasm.
He wasn’t even super, either
Just embarrassing really
i`m not really clear on just who was embarrassed though.
Getting killed by Blaine O’Malley is pretty embarrassing, honestly. Ross really coulda made some better choices in life, maybe ones that didn’t result in such a stupid death.
could be worse. could have tried to tackle Blaine off of a building and fail to hold onto him.
As much as I appreciate dunking on Mike’s single most redeeming moment (because let’s be honest here, it’s probably what he would’ve wanted), I imagine going from a jump-tackle to a grab mid-jump seems legitimately difficult. Even just holding on. Mike seemed like he was attractive, but I don’t recall him actually exercising particularly.
Could be worse, she could have fallen out of her top while all the blood rushing to her head knocks her unconscious.
On the scale of hilarious bungling this is perfectly reasonable buffoonery.
It could be worse, Joyce, your shirt’s not ending up over your head.
Yet.
That wouldn’t be so bad. it might get Dorothy’s attention back where it belongs.
Could maybe take your glasses off while working out.
She’s trapped there, she belongs to the exercise equipment now.
Nice callback.
“IN THE [Exercise Equipment]! PART OF THE [Exercise Equipment]!”
(The all caps part is the voice clip from that Adventure Time episode with the chanting animals. The part in brackets is meant to be a generic, flat-inflection overdub of the words in a bland male voice)
IN THE [Mr. Black]! PART OF THE [Mr. Black]!
exactly
I just had to look up the song “Everybody’s Girl” from STEEL PIER.
Okay but that position though?
Jokes on you. I find both of those options hot.
She’s reminiscing about their first date.
surprised i had to scroll so far for someone to mention that first punch lol
It’s really more of a Jennifer/Ruth thing.
For some reason I just now noticed the “Who’s better at spotting Jacob? ” poll. As I type this “I harbor perverse sexual lust” is winning with 41٪ of the vote. Fair, because who doesn’t, but it doesn’t seem quite relevant.
It’s clearly the “I don’t care about the question but I wanna vote for something” choice.
See, for me, it was the “this option is much funnier than the actual answers” choice.
Sitting up once would be impressive. But sitting up twice? That’s something you should tell everyone about.
… you know, like a sit rep.
Punch him in the face twice
Soooo bad!
She does have experience with that. It was through a proxy, but she’s well versed in punching him in the face.
No, she was punching him by the end of the date. too.
Maybe I should make a DoA board game… “Slips and Slides”
There goes building up her core strength
Will this relationship take a slide after this?
Mike would have been proud.
Anti-grav glasses!
Somehow im on a roll with nonsense.
Please use your finger to diddle the following red words to peruse Part 8 of Make Love Not War~ (NSFW), an exclusive, if apocryphal, Space Captain Julia Gray (and her trusted BFF President Doris Keener) sexy caper. If on laptop, you may also need to click on the red words.
The actual banging is about to start, probably
The anatomy here is perfect.
i did my research
People on Facebook are always inviting me to touch something on a post, and I always want to reply, “okay, I touched this 27″ monitor — was something supposed to happen?”
that’s fair. if on desktop use the clicker thing too.
Milu, I think I haven’t told you before, but I’m VERY enjoying this fine piece of literature/art combo ♥
awwww thank you!!! that means a lot, truly 🥰
Aw, isn’t that sweet, Joyce wants to recreate their first date.
Oh, hey, it turns out someone already made that connection…
Also, nice touch with Joyce’s glasses slowly slipping off. Mine would be on the floor almost immediately, but I guess hers fit better.
That looks like the sort of thing you have to work up to in order to be able to both do it and not strain something, if your baseline is 0 exercise.
After 10 minutes, outside gym, Joyce: “He j-just t-t-ouch m-my legs. And even my tights”
“The worst thing that has ever happened to me” she says after multiple assaults, a kidnapping, and the loss of several people in her life.
Exaggeration? Never met her.
also, some of her food touched before.
OUTTA THE WAY JOYCE I’M BOUTTA GET IT
Joyce definitely needs to start going to the gym for reals.
I note Joe didn’t state where he’d kiss her…
I wouldn’t let her down; either way, she has to do a sit up, so Joe’s face, is perfectly safe, from punches.
Joe should now that thing is excruciating for beginners that’s like making someone’s first exercise handstand pushups
I mean, Joyce picked this particular exercise, he is just trying to help by explaining how you do it. And seeing how stubborn she was about Knowing how to use it she would probably reject any suggestions to pick a different exercise.
She’d rather punch than kiss him?
That’s gonna be an interesting slipshine
I still don’t really buy Joe and Joyce together. Joes character development was undersold and it’s like I’m looking at a new character that I don’t know
Really? A good deal of comic time was spent on his development
It makes sense to me.
I think it was pretty clear that Joe was never as much of a butt opening as he pretended, but he thought he was just being funny until people started calling him out.