Coupled with Walky screwing up in basically every way, in her eyes at least, temporarily displacing Sal as the black sheep (pun intended, but I feel icky about that one). I doubt it’ll last, either they’ll both end up catching crap from her permanently and ruin all their relationships (except Walky and Sal, I expect them to mostly get closer as siblings, at least in the long run, from the experience), or the status quo will be restored somehow or another but it will suck for both of the twins with Walky’s eyes being fully opened and maybe being forced to empathize more properly with his sister, maybe even experience full grown character growth?
Actually, this dynamic is VERY reminiscent of my own mother. Mom almost always has at least one kid that is the bad one and one that can do no wrong. It’s not always the same person depending on what is going on at the time. There’s 4 of us, so there’s options. One sister has been the bad one most, but she cut the family off (especially mom). She’s still bad, but not as easy to complain about someone you never see, so now the “bad status” rotates around the rest of us. I’m usually the one in her good graces by stint of being the only boy as well as the fact that I tend to be drama avoidant, but I’ve been on her crap list before.
I was definitely the favorite child who could do no wrong in my grandma’s eyes. But she never saw my sister as the bad one, her favoritism was just clear.
That’s not the cynic in you that’s the “is literate and can hold long term memory” in you. She was treating sal the way she usually does that morning until she met danny
I agree with Clif. Sal knows it’s just based on the whitebread, she knows it’s all fake and temporary and provisional as heck. She’s just so starved for her parents’ love and respect and approval that she’ll accept these scraps of conditional love, over getting none at all.
Frank Miller, for all that he’s terrible in so many ways, wrote a bit in one comic that I still think of as good. The protagonist is being tempted by an illusion that he knows is fake. And he tells himself he’ll fight it … in a moment.
A lot of people remember the Berenstain bears as the Berenstine Bears. But it never was. There is a joke(?) that its a convergence of alternate timelines.
The joke is that, from Sal’s perspective, she’s entered an alternate timeline where her parents are kind to her (and the Berenstain Bears are spelled different).
If we run into someone from a BerenSTINE universe I’m gonna ask who won the presidential election in 1980 ’cause it’s gonna be John B. Anderson or somebody like that. Gotta be.
In my universe the alternate spelling was Berenstein too. Does this mean that I’ve moved timelines, or just that there have been people coming in from more than one?
The children’ss book series is called the Berenstain Bears, but a lot of people SWEAR they remember it as the Berenstein Bears, giving rise to mostly joking theories of timeline changes and skipping through parallel universes that are most the same except… Truly it’s just another example of the Mandela effect.
They didn’t actually name them stain bears? 😲 Berenstein makes more sense!! We are not mad! We have not slipped down the wrong trouserleg of causality!
Berenstain is the name of the authors. An unusual spelling, which instead of being easier to remember apparently made people think it must be wrong and correct it in their mind.
(And then 40 years later those people found the Berenstain books of their childhood on the Internet and decided instead of them remembering wrong it’s the universe that is wrong.)
There’s kind of a Mandela effect with my surname among the older generation where I live. I had a relative who was kind of a local celebrity back in the day and he did commentary or something on TV, where his name was displayed. Our name is Portuguese and it’s spelt phonetically except for a silent letter at the end that doesn’t make sense in English, so people automatically moved it to where it’d make more sense or deleted it all together. So they swear that it was spelt x or y, but it’s actually z(ee). We’d probably have a berenstain situation if we published books
And just to get the last bit of info out: it’s called the Mandela effect because another notable case of is the belief that Nelson Mandela died in prison sometime in the 1980’s.
And I’m pretty sure that belief about Mandela is the result of confusing him with Steve Biko, who died in prison in South Africa in 1977. So why did people move it to the 80s and Mandela? Well, a movie about Biko starring Denzel Washington, Cry Freedom, came out in 1987, Peter Gabriel wrote a song about him in 1980, and Nelson Mandela’s plight, and apartheid in general, entered the American public consciousness in the 80s. So people being people, our memories just combined all of this into Nelson Mandela.
TVA in this context refers to the Time Variance Authority from the Loki series, who monitor and maintain the Sacred Timeline by pruning any deviant timelines that splinter off.
i was never good at spelling that kinda name but i vaguely remember the cartoon lol.
Tho i like that one joke (tweet?) that said something to the effect of “Men will invent a whole new multiverse theory rather than admit they’re wrong” XD
Sorry you’re in my timeline now after the truck killed me and then 9/11 happened. My hypothesis is that the terrorists were caught by airport security in the timeline where I died permanently when the truck killed me, but were not paying attention in this timeline. Also President Gore would have never allowed the war in Iraq when the terrorists were all Saudi, but when I came back that idiot Bush was president.
There is a series of books, videos, et al about the “Berenstain Bears.” But many people remember it distinctly as “Berenstein Bears.” Whichs is other claimed as evidence of alternate universes, time travel, cover ups, etc.
Was it ever indicated that he wanted to be walky to them? I remember sal saying it’d be weird to call him that since they share a surname. A nickname might just be a nickname, not your preferred name always
I find Linda’s sudden acceptance of Sal a little… creepy? I’m not sure what the right word is, but I don’t trust the newfound respect Linda and Charles are showing.
Yeah, the change is just too fast. It feels suspicious. It is possible this is just the result of slow progressive change we never saw (it is implied Walky has spent the summer working to get his parents to treat Sal better and see her for who she is) that was catalyzed by this event.
Still it does feel very, off. It’s like watching a geolocator of a guy you thought was on foot suddenly going 400 mph in the opposite direction. Either there is something very fishy going on or we never understood the underlying situation to begin with – both outcomes are quite disconcerting.
Glad to hear I’m not the only one. If it is a result of Linda and Charles getting along better with Sal over the course of Walky’s help, then I hope we see some of that in some flashbacks.
Winter break, not summer. And I don’t know how much of an impact there was considering the Walkertons’ treatment of her this weekend before they met Danny.
At the risk of sounding like a Linda supporter, I would point out that most of her presence in the comic has been colored by Sal’s very negative adversarial relationship with her mother.
Now that’s definitely not to say Linda is a great mom or person or anything. She is/was obviously a very controlling parent, the “I know what’s good for you and you don’t” type of mom. Hell she literally just shouted at Walky about his grades. It also seems pretty safe to assume she has plenty of well ingrained prejudice/biases that she really need to work on; we’ve certainly been given no reason to think otherwise.
At the same time, I would say that most parents aren’t exactly opening up to their kids about everything, and Linda definitely doesn’t seem (and I guess has been shown to be) the type to even attempt to explain herself to Sal or Walky. Up till… basically this meal, Sal has only ever seen Linda as an authority figure and Linda has (I assume) only seen Sal as a child to be mothered. To me this just looks like Linda stepping back and treating Sal like her own person for the first time.
I dunno maybe I’m just delusional, hoping that in a story with a bunch of bad parents at least one of them is slightly less bad than previously thought.
No I actually wondered the same thing, like it’s not like her parents are perfect but I am starting to ponder if her perceptions have changed a little and she’s starting to let go of her frustrations with Sal. She even said “Well, you’re growing up right, I would value your input” and I wonder if the entire weird racial politics at play with Walky and her is just “mother knows best” style hovering that is starting to ebb slowly since she’s not a narcissistic parent. Weirder things have happened!
It would be kind of a neat wrap to the story if after all of the horrible, controlling, abusive parents, this one just needed a little time away and some maturity on everyone’s part to solve itself.
This, and we still have all the previous on-screen evidence of Linda to go on. Flying into a rage at her kids’ treatment and things that impact her own reputation specifically while being hard on them herself. Presumptions about immigrants and minorities unless proven ‘one of the good ones’ to her somehow. Those gift boxes, with home-baked cookies for Miss Billingsworth, and a gift voucher for Sal.
That’s actually a good point, so much happens in this comic it’s hard to keep track of all of it. She’s been in the comic a *lot* more than I remembered!
Yeah no same here. Linda so quickly approving of Sal because of a partner and a minor fuck-up from Walky means the situation could also very quickly be reversed again. This situation is not stable or reliable in any way. And yet, Sal probably wants to believe it is, setting her up for getting hurt.
I think it’s stable insofar as this tracks with who Linda is and how she behaves (from what we’ve seen). Linda judges her children for their choices, even when they were literal children (and despite the fact that it was her job, when they were children, to teach them to make “good” choices), and still now. It’s quite predictable to a certain extent; Sal and Walky both knew what would happen when they flaunted their respective choices in SOs in front of their parents. Walky has historically had an easier time dealing with this behavior because the things he has been judged for are objectively bad: bad grades, cheating, dating the girl Linda wanted to kick out of school, etc. But he knows what happens to kids that make “bad” choices in his family, which explains his literal panic over his bad grades. Meanwhile, Sal has had a more difficult time with this because she has been judged for things that Linda considers bad, but most people would consider objectively good: we haven’t seen any problems with Sal’s relationship with Linda that didn’t ultimately stem from Sal’s relationship with and care for Marcie, which Linda did not like. So in that way, you’re right that this dynamic with Linda isn’t “reliable,” because Linda’s biases make her rather unpredictable as the family arbiter of “good kid” vs. “problem child.”
My point is, I think we—and Sal—can rely pretty well on this situation staying put for awhile…at least until Linda learns of a “bad choice” Sal has made that would negate the “good” choice of BF. (Does Linda know Marcie is still around? …That might do it.) The question is how Sal feels about it. It can’t be easy to know that parental affection, support, and respect are conditional based on how they subjectively judge your choices, and Sal has been dealing with that situation for awhile.
Agreed. I think it’s less sensible for the readership to be asking OURSELVES if we were wrong all along, than it would be for us to be afraid for Sal doing it to herself instead.
I do love that, with even a modicum of thought, Linda could realise the child she’s more impressed with as an adult right now is the one she had least hand in actually raising up to become so. Maybe Charles already realises.
I have just now started to wonder whether Charles has been working on Linda off-screen to heal some of the strains in their family before the kids fly away to lead their own lives.
Might be. Or this really has to do with Danny, because he’s proof she has learned to not be friends with people who rob stores. Asher was flat-out dangerous and a very bad influence even as a kid. Danny is kind of the opposite.
And she knows this off of meeting him one day for lunch. Wonder what makes him seem so different to her.
Why he seems a better influence than Asher. Or Marcie.
It’s also weird that her approval comes from her not being friends with people who rob stores considering Sal certainly wasn’t as a five year old but that didn’t stop Linda from favouring Walky at the time.
It does mean it’s not down to her ‘not being friends with people who rob stores’. That was never Linda’s problem with Sal. As for honouring positive change – sure, it doesn’t mean that, but Linda only noticed them when she had a nice white boyfriend so I’m pressing X to doubt.
They rated him a “wholesome nerd” when “the goodest boy” when they met him.so they definitely do consider him being sals boyfriend a good thing. The question is whether that’s enough so chance how they see sal.
It’s because she has a nice white boy next to her now. Probably means she’s settled down from her “thuggish” ways /s
The shrew has been tamed and now sal can be the “nice” girl in close proximity to whiteness that her mom always wanted her to be
More like the illusion of Hope, put there by design.
Sal has only gotten respect from Linda because the latter roped her into a game in which she could use her white boyfriend to bargain for said respect. Sal has once more been put in a One Up One Down structure, paying for the respect she gets from Linda while giving her respect freely.
I think perhaps the most significant thing in this conversation is not what was said but what was not. Linda called her daughter Sal, not Sally. That is a level of respect and abolition of control that, I don’t believe even Walky ever got (I think she always called him David).
Yeah, I was wondering if Sal did call him Walky. I can’t remember, but she usually refers to him as “bro” or “my brother” if she refers to him at all. Glad someone could confirm this.
Sal said at one point, iirc, that she’s just not going to call her own brother by his last name, or a variation thereof.
And in this *one particular instance* I agree with both her and their parents on that one – if Walky doesn’t care to push the issue, it’s reasonable to call him by a nickname that isn’t his last name that they all (or probably all) share.
Yeah, plus, it might feel mighty strange for your parents to call you by your nickname. Well, for me it would. That name’s for friends, not for parents I don’t trust.
I found it hard to believe that Dina never called him Walky, so I checked all the strips with both Dina and Walky (except most of the ones during the kidnapping as I didn’t feel like going down that rabbit hole).
Dina has called him Walky to his face.
One time.
She has called him Walkerton one time and Fake Dinosaur Boy one time as well.
Of course, I didn’t check just Dina strips to see if she called him Walky when talking to others.
That aside, I was very surprised to realize that not only does she almost never call him Walky (when speaking to him), but that she almost never calls him anything.
Oh, I missed the one where she called him Walky, I saw the Walkerton one though.
Sal, though, calls him Bro so much, it’s like the original dialogue is in Japanese.
Also do note that, according to the last panel of the Dina X Becky Slipshine, Dina has revised said stance, stating that she “owes Dorothy an apology”.
I wonder how much of the parents’ reluctance to call her Sal is its status as a unisex nickname. (It can be short for Salvatore, and was also the nickname of Mike Doonesbury’s little brother, Benjamin, in the “Doonesbury” comic strip. Also the pizzeria owner in “Do the Right Thing,” IIRC.) I wonder whether that was why she liked it — equating defiance of feminine gender roles as more “tough” or “adult”.
What, because she didn’t immediately come down on her oppressive and emotionally volatile mother who just threw her for a loop and keeps tossing her curveballs?
What do you do when you understand that the parent you’ve wanted to build a relationship with is finally doing it, but you know it’s for toxic reasons?
Do you genuinely take the invitation, even though you know it’ll likely be temporary so you have a chance at building up something more permanent or at the very least get the experience to get closure on what could have never been….
or
turn it down.
I can’t imagine this leading to closure really. Well, maybe on a “so there’s really nothing wrong with me personally, my parents just are messed up” kinda perspective, but not from the acecptance itself, if it’s just going to get withdrawn again sooner or later.
Sooo…does she not want to see Walky tomorrow, is taking it as a given she will see him tomorrow, or will she remember to ask him in the next strip or so?
I don’t quite read this as Sal panicking, but just not being ready for the complete 180 Linda has done (plus it’s definitely suspiciously abrupt). She has lived her whole life where her response would likely have been considered back-talk and either dismissed or punished, never accepted or agreed with.
The last panel could read that she didn’t expect her new favorite-child status to last through the meal, that whatever goodwill Danny bought her with her folks was expected to be fleeting, and instead now she has to choose whether to continue playing this game (instead of her parents choosing to end it for her). It comes across like someone who’s not used to being valued as an employee asking for a raise, expecting to have to fight/struggle for it and end up barely eking out a cost of living adjustment if anything, only for their boss to agree that they deserve a raise, and in fact probably more than they’re asking for.
Did you notice how Jennifer and Linda were literally screaming at Walky in public for something that absolutely did not warrant a scene? She’s more likely to make matters worse.
i’m not sure what jen would have an issue with in this case tho, even if she doesn’t consider lucy a ‘friend’ i’d think she’d tolerate lucy and obviously ruining their relationship on purpose probably wouldn’t “benefit” her in anyway if it ends up making things tense because they still have to share a dorm together unless she basically ends up staying at asher’s room
Don’t get me wrong; I’m as suspicious of Linda as anyone. But this seems to me a case of Linda (and Charles) treating Sal like an adult because she’s acting like one. Compare to Walky, who’s still acting like a big teenager most of the time.
Now, if this is the case, they’re likely to assume Sal’s maturity is a result of their “tough love” over the years, meaning they’re going to feel vindicated in how they’ve treated her in the past. I’m not gonna like that, and neither is Sal, probably.
I wonder how Linda will answer Sal if her daughter start to question her treatment she got since adolescence.
My bet is: Linda will deny everything, as the classic “I don’t remember”
We will all be snug in our graves when it happens. That’s the sort of thing you do in your forties, when you’re well established on your own, (we may hope) successful in your parents’ eyes, and have nothing to lose.
agreeable? When sal said to give Lucy a shot she was willing, and she seemed to be taking what Sal was saying into account more
I hope its not just because she has a white boyfriend but the fact hat sal said h”Hey shes a good person giver a shot” And linda was all “Okay if you say so”
Maybe just maybe Linda is becoming a decent perosn
Maybe
I don’t think it’s just because she’s got a white boyfriend, but I think it’s a large factor.
The thing is, Linda is the sort of racist who would be absolutely horrified and outraged by any suggestion she’s a racist. And I don’t see how you can move on from that without acknowledging it first.
But, by the same token, not only has Danny’s existence encouraged her to consider Sal’s opinions more because Sal is now Doing The Right Thing, but she was confronted with the fact she had no reason not to like Lucy that she was prepared to admit to herself.
I wanna point out that there is a very bold line between how Linda was treating sal this morning and how she’s acting now, and that line was meeting her white boyfriend
This is just creepy. Look at the lighting, it’s completely devoid of warmth. Not even a light through a window. And Linda going from screeching and frothing at the mouth and trying to leap over the table, to being all smiles and positivity? No, this strip is unsettling.
It’s not creepy; it’s Indiana in January. This is what it’s like: gray. Gray sky, gray light, it even makes the snow look gray. Gray feelings. The clouds roll in and don’t leave for weeks and weeks.
I wonder, is this just a “My parents are people with many different characteristics than just one bad thing”?
Or is Danny’s whiteness rubbing off Sal and makes her more… a “good kid”?
I think sal is just entering the next phase of her life. A lot of her “bad behaviour” was out of anger for how her mom treated Marcie, eventually everyone has to move on and keep living. She’s had to go to boarding school and a lot of her life and personality were defined about being born too bad for her mom’s approval, which now that she’s settling into adulthood and they’ve been able to exchange more than five words, her mom is able to re-evaluate her as an adult, which she is legitimately doing better and is more stable than she was in her teens.
Given the reputation of Catholic boarding schools, as well as juvenile “justice alternative” schooling in general, I am full of trepidation about Sal’s past, there. She has said it was “like prison,” but hasn’t said much else about it, except for how she learned to escape it.
I lost a dear friend to one of those “reform schools” — the “tough love” “boarding schools” that pose as “alternative sentencing” for “troubled youths” that inconveniently keep harming children.
Sal’s trapped in the role of “daughter that grounds me”, yet again. I don’t know anymore whether to say “good for her” or “get out of here” ; I’m in a sort of weird situation myself that I’ve become the good kid because my brother forfeited and I can feel the material advantages to this (my mom wants to give me money apparently lol that’s new) but also the emotional distress that it causes (how easy it is for her to paint herself as a good mom by giving the fucking minimum after years of verbal abuse).
Have I mentioned that this storyline is very cathartic for me? I think I have. So I thank Willis for the ride, and all of you comment-section-dwellers for the infinite chorus of opinions, shimmering in this space like crickets on a hot summer day. (I know some of the comment section is made of people who complain about the characters then some other people who complain about the people complaining about the characters but I must say? It’s an incredible phenomenon to witness, all of us people coming day after day reacting live to a piece or media/art that is presented to us. I love that. I love being here with you all.)
((Sorry for the broken english as always, not a native speaker, honhonhon.))
Honestly, I don’t think Sal knows how to feel about it either.
On one hand, it is what a child like Sal has craved for a long time – to be heard, listened to, loved, by her mother. But on the other hand, her mother hasn’t really changed, so could turn on her again so easily. Is it wrong to want to ride that good feeling for as long as it will last? Is that untrue to yourself after all the years you put yourself on guard against this very person?
There is no true right or wrong answer, but the cognitive dissonance is uncomfortable and difficult to ignore in this type of situation that part of you is happy, but parts of you also know, it could end so terribly. You don’t know whether to put your guard down or keep it raised to the highest level.
Yeah, what a bittersweet moment! Finally feeling some warmth/civility/inclusion from your mother who always treated you as lesser and not worth her time.. and knowing still she is a toxic, hurtful person that has scarred you deeply.
Mother-daughter stories (like EEAAO, my favourite movie) are some of my favourite narratives because I can so strongly relate to that battle of feelings and that underlying desire to be loved held from when you were a child that you feel through all of it. Cathartic storylines abound in Dumbing of Age!
Love how you described the comment section – what a lovely image. It is so nice to read everyone’s experiences and opinions and have this comic as a routine in my life.
P.S. in my opinion your writing is have a fluent and evocative – it’s not broken at all.
This is not true. Native speakers are the experts in their own speech variety. Barring momentary disfluencies or serious language-related disabilities, it’s a basic principle of linguistics that adults do not make mistakes in their own native language.
Okay, one of us is high right now. People make mistakes in their own language fucking constantly? Otherwise malapropisms wouldn’t be a thing? Are you takin’ the piss?
I already addressed malapropisms – those would be covered under momentary disfluencies.
It is considered axiomatic in the science of linguistics that people know how to speak their own language. Anything else is an absurdity, a suggestion that there’s some perfect platonic form of language that somehow manages to exist independent of the speakers.
You’re rejecting the equivalent of cell theory. The fact that native speakers do not make mistakes in their own language is fundamental to the science of linguistics.
this is… fundamentally in contradiction with your previous statement, unless you’re defining “speech community” as never having a size greater than one.
I think by “language” you mean “idiolect.” From whence, “their *own* language.” Not their native tongue, but their own idiosyncratic manner of speech. It’s a tautology. One’s own way of speaking is by definition correct for oneself in that moment. By one definition.
You know, the Walkerton parents have unexpectedly shown up on campus for unexplained reasons, and now they are going to be there for at least an additional day. I can’t help feeling that there’s another shoe to drop. Don’t have any idea what it is yet, but …
They gave notice they were coming to visit, information which walkys adhd deleted, so its not unexpected. It is weird given winter break wasn’t that long ago, it’s been a couple weeks max.
a few days ago I was saying Linda’s hostile words towards Amber were understandable from the point of view that she views Amber as the unhinged violent person who stabbed her child and never suffered any consequences for it.
now she’s expecting Amber to say thank you??
I really thought Linda lack of civility was consistent for her, but now she expects Amber to be civil in the face of open hostility? huh???
Unfortunately, that’s incredibly consistent with the way people like Linda behave. They get to do and say whatever they want, no matter how wrong or uncalled for it is, and everyone else has to be grateful to even exist near them. If they suffer consequences, it’s persecution. If they persecute, it’s normal conversation.
I mean, if hypothetically I am being nasty to someone on purpose, it’s to drive them away. I thought making Amber leave without another word was the purpose of being mean to her
wait…they…they finished the meal?? i had to go back to make sure i hadn’t missed a strip. the last we saw, there was LITERAL screaming happening. the last we saw, walky had just brought up lucy to his mom and then said he was “breaking up” with amber. and then…they all just……continued the outing?? they let all of that just go and blow over and they sat there and waited to order and for the food to arrive and then finished the meal????? and apparently – judging by today’s strip – had a decent time?? like, they made conversation after that? and they still, i guess, actually think walky’s dating amber? they didn’t question it further??? THEY FINISHED THE MEAL???
post-timeskip the characters are acting more and more like sitcom caricatures and less like fully fleshed three dimensional people like they were written before.
Everyone gets over shit really easily and quickly, as the plot demands it, but at the expense of any of the character development feeling organic at all
My headcanon is that after Walky “broke up” with her, Amber retreated into her phone and said nothing further for the rest of the meal, but nonetheless stayed because she had been promised free pizza. Or else grabbed all the breadsticks and left early.
Maybe Danny swooped in with some meal-rescuing smalltalk patter. He’s seen the Amber “fake girlfriend” routine before, and knows how vital securing parental approval can be. I’d bet Charles was happy to paper over the prior conversation by re-engaging with Danny about school or work or music or somesuch.
Walky was probably too mortified by the earlier screaming to say much more. Didn’t quite have the courage to call attention to himself by leaving early. Just tried to make himself small and unnoticeable.
I mean, I think it makes sense. More sense than anyone stalking off. “To stay in pain is to avoid pain,” as the old Al-Anon saying goes.
My headcanon is also that with Mrs. Walkerton’s “trying” to sue Amber’s mom 30 times, the Walkerton family wound up having to pay judicial sanctions that wound up covering Amber’s remaining tuition for the year. That’s the story I tell myself and I’m sticking to it! 😉
This is giving me some serious anxiety. Linda is dangling the prospect of a loving, accepting parent in front of Sal because she got with an Acceptable White Boy. But the moment something goes wrong, the moment Sal does something Linda doesn’t like it will be back to the Scapegoat child hole for her.
Oof, as someone who went from being the Scapegoat in my mother’s eyes to the Golden Child in more recent years… Sal’s face in that last panel, the hope of it, is breaking my heart. Because I don’t trust that this will end well. But even if she *does* become the favorite child, that’s also a shitty position to be in, in a different way. Do I hope Linda is going to turn over a new leaf? Yes. Do I trust it? Hell no.
The lighting looks like it’s later in the day than I thought. If this were a late lunch, Linda’s excuse to get out of lunch with Lucy would be a conspicuously unaddressed issue. Looking more like it was an early dinner.
I wonder where they went for lunch. Probably Dave and Busters.
Having been in Sal’s usual position my entire life, I concur. The handful of times my mom put on a normal-mom mask just made me want to run away screaming because it was wrong and all the bad stuff was still there under the surface. Today’s strip makes me want to crawl out of my own skin, the visceral “NOPE” reaction is still so strong. I hope Sal sees the trap and avoids it.
I’m seeing a surprising amount of Linda defense in the comments. It’s certainly possible that she’s not the monster that most parents in this comic have been so far. It’s more probable, I think, that she is a mixture of monster and normal-ass person, like most real-world monsters. But I’d just like to point out one thing: agreeableness does not equate to, like… goodness, or respect.
Of course Linda is being agreeable now; Sal is doing the things Linda always wanted her to do. This is how abusers operate: If you conform to their vision for you, they can be quite nice. But it’s conditional. If abusers were horrible all the time, it wouldn’t be so hard to get people out of toxic relationships. I’m not saying Linda is an abuser (currently), I’m just saying it’s entirely reasonable to keep your guard up even if she’s being nicer than expected. Sal is right to be apprehensive in the final panel.
If people saw videos of Hitler or Stalin in home environments without knowing who they are they’d think they are just some nice middle-aged guys.
Just because an abuser is being nice at the moment doesn’t mean they won’t fly off the handle the moment things don’t go their way. Like this is some goldfish memory situation. She’s been tearing into Amber and Walky just a couple of strips ago! Not to mention her reaction to Lucy a bit further back.
Is this the first time Linda has called her daughter Sal rather than Sally? If so, that’s probably a little jarring on top of everything else making Sal feel like she’s crossed into the Twilight Zone.
…Sal’s being remarkably generous to Amber right now. More than I expected, given how much of Sal’s family status and perceived worth was riding on a “successful” family dinner. I wonder how or whether Amazi-Girl will address it with Sal later at roller derby.
I was under the impression that Amazi-Girl is the alter who plays roller derby, and that Amber and Amazi-Girl are still as dual/multiple as usual, with headMike no longer asserting himself quite so much up there.
I don’t think headMike is an alter in the traditional sense, but rather a kind of entity called an introject. (ask DID havers over here about them, I don’t know that much)
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“Who are these people, and what have they done to mah parents”
As much as I’d like this to be some form of redemption, the cynic in me blames the white boyfriend.
Coupled with Walky screwing up in basically every way, in her eyes at least, temporarily displacing Sal as the black sheep (pun intended, but I feel icky about that one). I doubt it’ll last, either they’ll both end up catching crap from her permanently and ruin all their relationships (except Walky and Sal, I expect them to mostly get closer as siblings, at least in the long run, from the experience), or the status quo will be restored somehow or another but it will suck for both of the twins with Walky’s eyes being fully opened and maybe being forced to empathize more properly with his sister, maybe even experience full grown character growth?
Actually, this dynamic is VERY reminiscent of my own mother. Mom almost always has at least one kid that is the bad one and one that can do no wrong. It’s not always the same person depending on what is going on at the time. There’s 4 of us, so there’s options. One sister has been the bad one most, but she cut the family off (especially mom). She’s still bad, but not as easy to complain about someone you never see, so now the “bad status” rotates around the rest of us. I’m usually the one in her good graces by stint of being the only boy as well as the fact that I tend to be drama avoidant, but I’ve been on her crap list before.
My grandma did the same thing. It’s awful.
My father-in-law came from a favoritism/black-sheep family, and he’s 76, and it still impacts him (though therapy helped tremendously).
That stuff is so harmful, yo.
I meant to say, it impacts him if he’s not being careful. Father-in-law is helping to break the generational cycle. ♡
I was definitely the favorite child who could do no wrong in my grandma’s eyes. But she never saw my sister as the bad one, her favoritism was just clear.
That’s not the cynic in you that’s the “is literate and can hold long term memory” in you. She was treating sal the way she usually does that morning until she met danny
Twilight Zone theme plays in the background on the last panel.
RE: Last panel,
Sal NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! 😭😭😭
Yup.
Sal is falling HARD for Linda’s bullshit.
She is not. She just wants to.
I agree with Clif. Sal knows it’s just based on the whitebread, she knows it’s all fake and temporary and provisional as heck. She’s just so starved for her parents’ love and respect and approval that she’ll accept these scraps of conditional love, over getting none at all.
Frank Miller, for all that he’s terrible in so many ways, wrote a bit in one comic that I still think of as good. The protagonist is being tempted by an illusion that he knows is fake. And he tells himself he’ll fight it … in a moment.
Sal: Bro these aint ah parents
In which Sal has become Foghorn Leghorn
Now these ain’t- ah say, uh- now these heeyuh folks ain’t mah parunts ya see
And now I expect to see just this, when the inevitable animation of DoA comes out.
(“Damn you, AI!” is gonna replace “Damn you, Willis!”?)
Thirteen years of strips to train on, this is gonna be pretty decent animation.
Sal wanted to give parental approval one more shot, on a whim.
She got it, and now she’s terrified.
Be careful what you wish for.
That feeling of basking in approval will fade quick the moment she ‘steps outta line’ though. at least we know she has support in all this
not used to being the good twin lmao
Avatar checks out!
praise RNGsus for giving me that one XD
Lol @ the alt text
absolutely
also absolutely correct
The alt text got me good.
I did indeed laugh aloud. Or well, giggle-weezed in surprise anyway.
Yeah it startled a guffaw out of me
That’s a Muttley laugh.
it’s incredible futurama made a ocmback lol
Show’s harder to kill than a comic book villain!
Oh fuck we’ve entered the Beren-stein universe
Pika pika? I don’t quite get the joke…
Its some Mandela effect nonsense.
A lot of people remember the Berenstain bears as the Berenstine Bears. But it never was. There is a joke(?) that its a convergence of alternate timelines.
But like, I don’t get what it has to do with the strip?
The joke is that, from Sal’s perspective, she’s entered an alternate timeline where her parents are kind to her (and the Berenstain Bears are spelled different).
BerenSTEIN, not stine.
If we run into someone from a BerenSTINE universe I’m gonna ask who won the presidential election in 1980 ’cause it’s gonna be John B. Anderson or somebody like that. Gotta be.
In my universe the alternate spelling was Berenstein too. Does this mean that I’ve moved timelines, or just that there have been people coming in from more than one?
Wait til you hear what happened in the BerenSTONE universe
Was that the one in which Paul McCartney was elected president because the Supreme Court ruled that he was born as naturally as anyone else?
oh christ just go ahead and remind me of the guy I would have wasted my vote on if I had been just a few weeks older
The day after the election I recolored the map to show Anderson winning in a landslide.
The children’ss book series is called the Berenstain Bears, but a lot of people SWEAR they remember it as the Berenstein Bears, giving rise to mostly joking theories of timeline changes and skipping through parallel universes that are most the same except… Truly it’s just another example of the Mandela effect.
They didn’t actually name them stain bears? 😲 Berenstein makes more sense!! We are not mad! We have not slipped down the wrong trouserleg of causality!
Berenstain is the name of the authors. An unusual spelling, which instead of being easier to remember apparently made people think it must be wrong and correct it in their mind.
(And then 40 years later those people found the Berenstain books of their childhood on the Internet and decided instead of them remembering wrong it’s the universe that is wrong.)
Reminds me of a tweet I saw that went something like “The Mandela effect? You mean you being wrong and kinda dumb?”
There’s kind of a Mandela effect with my surname among the older generation where I live. I had a relative who was kind of a local celebrity back in the day and he did commentary or something on TV, where his name was displayed. Our name is Portuguese and it’s spelt phonetically except for a silent letter at the end that doesn’t make sense in English, so people automatically moved it to where it’d make more sense or deleted it all together. So they swear that it was spelt x or y, but it’s actually z(ee). We’d probably have a berenstain situation if we published books
And just to get the last bit of info out: it’s called the Mandela effect because another notable case of is the belief that Nelson Mandela died in prison sometime in the 1980’s.
And I’m pretty sure that belief about Mandela is the result of confusing him with Steve Biko, who died in prison in South Africa in 1977. So why did people move it to the 80s and Mandela? Well, a movie about Biko starring Denzel Washington, Cry Freedom, came out in 1987, Peter Gabriel wrote a song about him in 1980, and Nelson Mandela’s plight, and apartheid in general, entered the American public consciousness in the 80s. So people being people, our memories just combined all of this into Nelson Mandela.
What do you mean? It’s always been the “Berenstine Bears.”
*immediately gets picked up by the TVA
What does the Tennessee Valley Authority have to do with this?
TVA in this context refers to the Time Variance Authority from the Loki series, who monitor and maintain the Sacred Timeline by pruning any deviant timelines that splinter off.
And the show makes good use of that premise, showing us such exotic and fantastical locales such as:
A random church
A Renaissance Faire
A train
A damp Walmart
Connecticut
i was never good at spelling that kinda name but i vaguely remember the cartoon lol.
Tho i like that one joke (tweet?) that said something to the effect of “Men will invent a whole new multiverse theory rather than admit they’re wrong” XD
Tomorrow Linda and Charles will want to talk about how Nelson Mandela died in the 1980s.
OH MY GOD I’M HOME?!
Holy hell, what a mess! Global warming, fascism – what’ve you idiots been DOING while I’ve been gone?
Your avatar is perfect.
She has amazing frowns 😀
Sorry you’re in my timeline now after the truck killed me and then 9/11 happened. My hypothesis is that the terrorists were caught by airport security in the timeline where I died permanently when the truck killed me, but were not paying attention in this timeline. Also President Gore would have never allowed the war in Iraq when the terrorists were all Saudi, but when I came back that idiot Bush was president.
There is a series of books, videos, et al about the “Berenstain Bears.” But many people remember it distinctly as “Berenstein Bears.” Whichs is other claimed as evidence of alternate universes, time travel, cover ups, etc.
(Answering NGPZ)
Sal, don’t fall for it! They were distracted today by Walky’s shenanigans, don’t make yourself the centre of their attention!
WOOOOOP WOOOP WOOOP WOOOPWOOP!!!
Careful what you wish for, because you just might get it.
Wait
Did Linda just call her “Sal” and not “Sally”?
I’m very thrown.
Yeah, that is pretty strange…
Yeah. I don’t think Walky ever got that level of respect for his wishes (I believe he was always “David” to his parents).
Was it ever indicated that he wanted to be walky to them? I remember sal saying it’d be weird to call him that since they share a surname. A nickname might just be a nickname, not your preferred name always
Maybe he really wanted to be Duke Reginald of Thingley.
tbf it would be weird of a parent to call him walky when their last name is walkerton, or just calling him a son-ish nickname like Sport/Buddy
I mean sal calls him David too. Like she said, it’d be weird for anyone in the family to call him a nickname based on his last name
Sal is thrown, too. The mother is clearly suspect in this.
I find Linda’s sudden acceptance of Sal a little… creepy? I’m not sure what the right word is, but I don’t trust the newfound respect Linda and Charles are showing.
Could just be my anxiety.
Yeah, the change is just too fast. It feels suspicious. It is possible this is just the result of slow progressive change we never saw (it is implied Walky has spent the summer working to get his parents to treat Sal better and see her for who she is) that was catalyzed by this event.
Still it does feel very, off. It’s like watching a geolocator of a guy you thought was on foot suddenly going 400 mph in the opposite direction. Either there is something very fishy going on or we never understood the underlying situation to begin with – both outcomes are quite disconcerting.
Glad to hear I’m not the only one. If it is a result of Linda and Charles getting along better with Sal over the course of Walky’s help, then I hope we see some of that in some flashbacks.
Winter break, not summer. And I don’t know how much of an impact there was considering the Walkertons’ treatment of her this weekend before they met Danny.
At the risk of sounding like a Linda supporter, I would point out that most of her presence in the comic has been colored by Sal’s very negative adversarial relationship with her mother.
Now that’s definitely not to say Linda is a great mom or person or anything. She is/was obviously a very controlling parent, the “I know what’s good for you and you don’t” type of mom. Hell she literally just shouted at Walky about his grades. It also seems pretty safe to assume she has plenty of well ingrained prejudice/biases that she really need to work on; we’ve certainly been given no reason to think otherwise.
At the same time, I would say that most parents aren’t exactly opening up to their kids about everything, and Linda definitely doesn’t seem (and I guess has been shown to be) the type to even attempt to explain herself to Sal or Walky. Up till… basically this meal, Sal has only ever seen Linda as an authority figure and Linda has (I assume) only seen Sal as a child to be mothered. To me this just looks like Linda stepping back and treating Sal like her own person for the first time.
I dunno maybe I’m just delusional, hoping that in a story with a bunch of bad parents at least one of them is slightly less bad than previously thought.
No I actually wondered the same thing, like it’s not like her parents are perfect but I am starting to ponder if her perceptions have changed a little and she’s starting to let go of her frustrations with Sal. She even said “Well, you’re growing up right, I would value your input” and I wonder if the entire weird racial politics at play with Walky and her is just “mother knows best” style hovering that is starting to ebb slowly since she’s not a narcissistic parent. Weirder things have happened!
It would be kind of a neat wrap to the story if after all of the horrible, controlling, abusive parents, this one just needed a little time away and some maturity on everyone’s part to solve itself.
Keep in mind though that she only started feeling more accepting of Sal because she showed with the Acceptable White Boy Danny.
This, and we still have all the previous on-screen evidence of Linda to go on. Flying into a rage at her kids’ treatment and things that impact her own reputation specifically while being hard on them herself. Presumptions about immigrants and minorities unless proven ‘one of the good ones’ to her somehow. Those gift boxes, with home-baked cookies for Miss Billingsworth, and a gift voucher for Sal.
That’s actually a good point, so much happens in this comic it’s hard to keep track of all of it. She’s been in the comic a *lot* more than I remembered!
Yes. And I would add that Sal and Linda seem to be personality types that tend to set each other off.
Yeah no same here. Linda so quickly approving of Sal because of a partner and a minor fuck-up from Walky means the situation could also very quickly be reversed again. This situation is not stable or reliable in any way. And yet, Sal probably wants to believe it is, setting her up for getting hurt.
I think it’s stable insofar as this tracks with who Linda is and how she behaves (from what we’ve seen). Linda judges her children for their choices, even when they were literal children (and despite the fact that it was her job, when they were children, to teach them to make “good” choices), and still now. It’s quite predictable to a certain extent; Sal and Walky both knew what would happen when they flaunted their respective choices in SOs in front of their parents. Walky has historically had an easier time dealing with this behavior because the things he has been judged for are objectively bad: bad grades, cheating, dating the girl Linda wanted to kick out of school, etc. But he knows what happens to kids that make “bad” choices in his family, which explains his literal panic over his bad grades. Meanwhile, Sal has had a more difficult time with this because she has been judged for things that Linda considers bad, but most people would consider objectively good: we haven’t seen any problems with Sal’s relationship with Linda that didn’t ultimately stem from Sal’s relationship with and care for Marcie, which Linda did not like. So in that way, you’re right that this dynamic with Linda isn’t “reliable,” because Linda’s biases make her rather unpredictable as the family arbiter of “good kid” vs. “problem child.”
My point is, I think we—and Sal—can rely pretty well on this situation staying put for awhile…at least until Linda learns of a “bad choice” Sal has made that would negate the “good” choice of BF. (Does Linda know Marcie is still around? …That might do it.) The question is how Sal feels about it. It can’t be easy to know that parental affection, support, and respect are conditional based on how they subjectively judge your choices, and Sal has been dealing with that situation for awhile.
Agreed. I think it’s less sensible for the readership to be asking OURSELVES if we were wrong all along, than it would be for us to be afraid for Sal doing it to herself instead.
Sal is conforming more to what they wanted in a kid and proving them right as parents, whereas Walky doing the opposite.
I do love that, with even a modicum of thought, Linda could realise the child she’s more impressed with as an adult right now is the one she had least hand in actually raising up to become so. Maybe Charles already realises.
Dunno, Sal has done a lot of character growth during this comic and this could be Linda finally noticing and honoring that.
I have just now started to wonder whether Charles has been working on Linda off-screen to heal some of the strains in their family before the kids fly away to lead their own lives.
Might be. Or this really has to do with Danny, because he’s proof she has learned to not be friends with people who rob stores. Asher was flat-out dangerous and a very bad influence even as a kid. Danny is kind of the opposite.
And she knows this off of meeting him one day for lunch. Wonder what makes him seem so different to her.
Why he seems a better influence than Asher. Or Marcie.
It’s also weird that her approval comes from her not being friends with people who rob stores considering Sal certainly wasn’t as a five year old but that didn’t stop Linda from favouring Walky at the time.
Her being a bad mom doesn’t mean she can’t honour positive changes in her daughter when she notices them. People aren’t absolutes.
It does mean it’s not down to her ‘not being friends with people who rob stores’. That was never Linda’s problem with Sal. As for honouring positive change – sure, it doesn’t mean that, but Linda only noticed them when she had a nice white boyfriend so I’m pressing X to doubt.
They rated him a “wholesome nerd” when “the goodest boy” when they met him.so they definitely do consider him being sals boyfriend a good thing. The question is whether that’s enough so chance how they see sal.
The other question is why?
Why did he instantly boost her status? And why did Linda still immediately assume Joyce was Walky’s new girlfriend and dismiss Lucy?
Doubt. He’s a tenured professional boat steadier if I’ve ever seen one. He’s not gonna “start trouble” if he doesn’t have to
It’s making me anxious too, but I felt it was too easy, too.
Sadly, I’ve learned early to keep the guard up when dealing with parents.
It’s because she has a nice white boy next to her now. Probably means she’s settled down from her “thuggish” ways /s
The shrew has been tamed and now sal can be the “nice” girl in close proximity to whiteness that her mom always wanted her to be
She’s Castra getting love from Shadow Weaver and doesn’t know how to deal with it.
Dammit, the typo ruined my She-Ra reference.
I think most of those who would get it still got it.
Thanks.
ooooo disturbing parallel is … accurate
Beautiful reference. Linda absolutely gives off strong Shadow Weaver vibes.
I should rewatch She-Ra.
A less self-aware version, maybe. Even more deluded in her righteousness.
At least shadow weaker knew she was evil. I mean, she named herself shadow weaver for God’s sake
Light Hope, then?
More like the illusion of Hope, put there by design.
Sal has only gotten respect from Linda because the latter roped her into a game in which she could use her white boyfriend to bargain for said respect. Sal has once more been put in a One Up One Down structure, paying for the respect she gets from Linda while giving her respect freely.
Oof, poor Sal…
I think perhaps the most significant thing in this conversation is not what was said but what was not. Linda called her daughter Sal, not Sally. That is a level of respect and abolition of control that, I don’t believe even Walky ever got (I think she always called him David).
To be fair, Walky is short for “Walkerton”. They’re all technically Walky.
Also “Walky” something a 6 year old made up, and not a more familiar type name like “Sal”.
Sal and Dina have also never called him Walky.
Yeah, I was wondering if Sal did call him Walky. I can’t remember, but she usually refers to him as “bro” or “my brother” if she refers to him at all. Glad someone could confirm this.
Sal said at one point, iirc, that she’s just not going to call her own brother by his last name, or a variation thereof.
And in this *one particular instance* I agree with both her and their parents on that one – if Walky doesn’t care to push the issue, it’s reasonable to call him by a nickname that isn’t his last name that they all (or probably all) share.
Yeah, plus, it might feel mighty strange for your parents to call you by your nickname. Well, for me it would. That name’s for friends, not for parents I don’t trust.
She has said canonically that she’s not going to call him that as it’s weird with it being more or less their last name.
I found it hard to believe that Dina never called him Walky, so I checked all the strips with both Dina and Walky (except most of the ones during the kidnapping as I didn’t feel like going down that rabbit hole).
Dina has called him Walky to his face.
One time.
She has called him Walkerton one time and Fake Dinosaur Boy one time as well.
Of course, I didn’t check just Dina strips to see if she called him Walky when talking to others.
That aside, I was very surprised to realize that not only does she almost never call him Walky (when speaking to him), but that she almost never calls him anything.
It’s like when you’re at a friend’s house and don’t address their parents by name.
Oh, I missed the one where she called him Walky, I saw the Walkerton one though.
Sal, though, calls him Bro so much, it’s like the original dialogue is in Japanese.
ope, there one is, in one of their earliest interactions. https://www.dumbingofage.com/inerrant/
lol, off topic, but the Dina panels are just like the comment section yesterday. https://www.dumbingofage.com/precipice/
Ah, good callback!
Also do note that, according to the last panel of the Dina X Becky Slipshine, Dina has revised said stance, stating that she “owes Dorothy an apology”.
Dina calls him Walky.
I wonder how much of the parents’ reluctance to call her Sal is its status as a unisex nickname. (It can be short for Salvatore, and was also the nickname of Mike Doonesbury’s little brother, Benjamin, in the “Doonesbury” comic strip. Also the pizzeria owner in “Do the Right Thing,” IIRC.) I wonder whether that was why she liked it — equating defiance of feminine gender roles as more “tough” or “adult”.
It’s disturbing how simple Linda is.
Sal literally just heard her parent call someone a “nothing” and is apparently totes okay with it.
What, because she didn’t immediately come down on her oppressive and emotionally volatile mother who just threw her for a loop and keeps tossing her curveballs?
Wait, if we’ve swapped into the evil parallel universe where are all the beards?
The cost of having a beard was raised in the evil universe; probably as a result of fashion choices here in this universe.
Walky’s beard just wandered off without saying anything.
Amazing.
+1
Damn.
Joyce hasn’t yet arrived to make them grow. The story had this inescapable timing difficulty and we all just have to live with it.
What do you do when you understand that the parent you’ve wanted to build a relationship with is finally doing it, but you know it’s for toxic reasons?
Do you genuinely take the invitation, even though you know it’ll likely be temporary so you have a chance at building up something more permanent or at the very least get the experience to get closure on what could have never been….
or
turn it down.
I can’t imagine this leading to closure really. Well, maybe on a “so there’s really nothing wrong with me personally, my parents just are messed up” kinda perspective, but not from the acecptance itself, if it’s just going to get withdrawn again sooner or later.
Depends on how much you want it, how much time and spirit you’re willing to spend, how many setbacks you’ll accept.
Somewhere in the backroom, Sal’s real parents are screaming at Galasso to let them go.
Sal is tasting the sweet nectar of parental appreciation and will probably revel in it even knowing its fake and will go away at the drop of a hat.
Damn it!
I fell asleep!
I hope I’m not to late to say this:
“You still have Zoidberg…
You ALL still have Zoidberg!
Zoi-oi-oidberg…”
“Now the rubber band is on the other claw!”
Sooo…does she not want to see Walky tomorrow, is taking it as a given she will see him tomorrow, or will she remember to ask him in the next strip or so?
Yeah. Kind of a parallel to her one-sided lunch invitation earlier that morning…
I don’t quite read this as Sal panicking, but just not being ready for the complete 180 Linda has done (plus it’s definitely suspiciously abrupt). She has lived her whole life where her response would likely have been considered back-talk and either dismissed or punished, never accepted or agreed with.
The last panel could read that she didn’t expect her new favorite-child status to last through the meal, that whatever goodwill Danny bought her with her folks was expected to be fleeting, and instead now she has to choose whether to continue playing this game (instead of her parents choosing to end it for her). It comes across like someone who’s not used to being valued as an employee asking for a raise, expecting to have to fight/struggle for it and end up barely eking out a cost of living adjustment if anything, only for their boss to agree that they deserve a raise, and in fact probably more than they’re asking for.
I read it simply as, “this is weird, how do I respond?”
“Where’s the catch?”
“When will the other shoe drop? Did it already drop? Did I miss it?”
“Hard Mode”. Gasp, Danny’s nerd talk is infecting her
Mario Kart — a shared passion!
I’d like to see Jennifer’s shocked reaction to Sal’s parents respecting Sal. (And respecting Lucy, too, I hope?)
maybe she’ll come along, she is lucy’s roommate and a family friend after all, and she can cover for any faux pas walky mkight make
Did you notice how Jennifer and Linda were literally screaming at Walky in public for something that absolutely did not warrant a scene? She’s more likely to make matters worse.
i’m not sure what jen would have an issue with in this case tho, even if she doesn’t consider lucy a ‘friend’ i’d think she’d tolerate lucy and obviously ruining their relationship on purpose probably wouldn’t “benefit” her in anyway if it ends up making things tense because they still have to share a dorm together unless she basically ends up staying at asher’s room
Don’t get me wrong; I’m as suspicious of Linda as anyone. But this seems to me a case of Linda (and Charles) treating Sal like an adult because she’s acting like one. Compare to Walky, who’s still acting like a big teenager most of the time.
Now, if this is the case, they’re likely to assume Sal’s maturity is a result of their “tough love” over the years, meaning they’re going to feel vindicated in how they’ve treated her in the past. I’m not gonna like that, and neither is Sal, probably.
I wonder how Linda will answer Sal if her daughter start to question her treatment she got since adolescence.
My bet is: Linda will deny everything, as the classic “I don’t remember”
We will all be snug in our graves when it happens. That’s the sort of thing you do in your forties, when you’re well established on your own, (we may hope) successful in your parents’ eyes, and have nothing to lose.
Oh, yeah! I get that one a LOT. From BOTH parents! X-D
That kinda already happened except Sal just overheard it versus them telling her that to her face.
It is weird that Linda seems to be
agreeable? When sal said to give Lucy a shot she was willing, and she seemed to be taking what Sal was saying into account more
I hope its not just because she has a white boyfriend but the fact hat sal said h”Hey shes a good person giver a shot” And linda was all “Okay if you say so”
Maybe just maybe Linda is becoming a decent perosn
Maybe
small chance
Teeny chance
I don’t think it’s just because she’s got a white boyfriend, but I think it’s a large factor.
The thing is, Linda is the sort of racist who would be absolutely horrified and outraged by any suggestion she’s a racist. And I don’t see how you can move on from that without acknowledging it first.
But, by the same token, not only has Danny’s existence encouraged her to consider Sal’s opinions more because Sal is now Doing The Right Thing, but she was confronted with the fact she had no reason not to like Lucy that she was prepared to admit to herself.
No chance. She treated Sal the same way she always did before she met Danny.
I wanna point out that there is a very bold line between how Linda was treating sal this morning and how she’s acting now, and that line was meeting her white boyfriend
A… pproval? From Linda? Who wants to see her tomorrow?!
[Unhandled exception error in sal.exe]
This is just creepy. Look at the lighting, it’s completely devoid of warmth. Not even a light through a window. And Linda going from screeching and frothing at the mouth and trying to leap over the table, to being all smiles and positivity? No, this strip is unsettling.
It’s not creepy; it’s Indiana in January. This is what it’s like: gray. Gray sky, gray light, it even makes the snow look gray. Gray feelings. The clouds roll in and don’t leave for weeks and weeks.
While i’ve never been in this situation myself, I can totaly relate with how Sal must be feeling there.
It’s like the whooped puppy, cautiously inching forward expecting a hit and curiously finding a treat.
Ugh. I saw something like that at the dog park just this morning.
Sal is going to blow up. lol
I wonder, is this just a “My parents are people with many different characteristics than just one bad thing”?
Or is Danny’s whiteness rubbing off Sal and makes her more… a “good kid”?
I think sal is just entering the next phase of her life. A lot of her “bad behaviour” was out of anger for how her mom treated Marcie, eventually everyone has to move on and keep living. She’s had to go to boarding school and a lot of her life and personality were defined about being born too bad for her mom’s approval, which now that she’s settling into adulthood and they’ve been able to exchange more than five words, her mom is able to re-evaluate her as an adult, which she is legitimately doing better and is more stable than she was in her teens.
And she has an Approved White Boyfriend so she MUST be worth listening too now.
Given the reputation of Catholic boarding schools, as well as juvenile “justice alternative” schooling in general, I am full of trepidation about Sal’s past, there. She has said it was “like prison,” but hasn’t said much else about it, except for how she learned to escape it.
I lost a dear friend to one of those “reform schools” — the “tough love” “boarding schools” that pose as “alternative sentencing” for “troubled youths” that inconveniently keep harming children.
Sal’s trapped in the role of “daughter that grounds me”, yet again. I don’t know anymore whether to say “good for her” or “get out of here” ; I’m in a sort of weird situation myself that I’ve become the good kid because my brother forfeited and I can feel the material advantages to this (my mom wants to give me money apparently lol that’s new) but also the emotional distress that it causes (how easy it is for her to paint herself as a good mom by giving the fucking minimum after years of verbal abuse).
Have I mentioned that this storyline is very cathartic for me? I think I have. So I thank Willis for the ride, and all of you comment-section-dwellers for the infinite chorus of opinions, shimmering in this space like crickets on a hot summer day. (I know some of the comment section is made of people who complain about the characters then some other people who complain about the people complaining about the characters but I must say? It’s an incredible phenomenon to witness, all of us people coming day after day reacting live to a piece or media/art that is presented to us. I love that. I love being here with you all.)
((Sorry for the broken english as always, not a native speaker, honhonhon.))
Honestly, I don’t think Sal knows how to feel about it either.
On one hand, it is what a child like Sal has craved for a long time – to be heard, listened to, loved, by her mother. But on the other hand, her mother hasn’t really changed, so could turn on her again so easily. Is it wrong to want to ride that good feeling for as long as it will last? Is that untrue to yourself after all the years you put yourself on guard against this very person?
There is no true right or wrong answer, but the cognitive dissonance is uncomfortable and difficult to ignore in this type of situation that part of you is happy, but parts of you also know, it could end so terribly. You don’t know whether to put your guard down or keep it raised to the highest level.
Think of it as a chance for Sal to reinforce good behavior by rewarding it. One tiny step toward the objective, but still a step.
It can be.
It’s just sad to know Sal could lose it again and that could hurt worse than never having a good relationship at all for even one moment.
Yeah, what a bittersweet moment! Finally feeling some warmth/civility/inclusion from your mother who always treated you as lesser and not worth her time.. and knowing still she is a toxic, hurtful person that has scarred you deeply.
Mother-daughter stories (like EEAAO, my favourite movie) are some of my favourite narratives because I can so strongly relate to that battle of feelings and that underlying desire to be loved held from when you were a child that you feel through all of it. Cathartic storylines abound in Dumbing of Age!
Love how you described the comment section – what a lovely image. It is so nice to read everyone’s experiences and opinions and have this comic as a routine in my life.
P.S. in my opinion your writing is have a fluent and evocative – it’s not broken at all.
Never worry about not being a non-native english speaker. 😉
English: The language that gives even native speakers trouble.
Non native speakers are usually better at it than us
This is not true. Native speakers are the experts in their own speech variety. Barring momentary disfluencies or serious language-related disabilities, it’s a basic principle of linguistics that adults do not make mistakes in their own native language.
Okay, one of us is high right now. People make mistakes in their own language fucking constantly? Otherwise malapropisms wouldn’t be a thing? Are you takin’ the piss?
I already addressed malapropisms – those would be covered under momentary disfluencies.
It is considered axiomatic in the science of linguistics that people know how to speak their own language. Anything else is an absurdity, a suggestion that there’s some perfect platonic form of language that somehow manages to exist independent of the speakers.
Native speakers do not make mistakes in their own language.
Hah ha ha ha he he he he he. Wheeze!
Good one!
You’re rejecting the equivalent of cell theory. The fact that native speakers do not make mistakes in their own language is fundamental to the science of linguistics.
You mean, they speak that way on purpose? How rude.
What way? Correctly? Yes, by definition the norms of a speech community are correct, and people do it correctly and on purpose.
this is… fundamentally in contradiction with your previous statement, unless you’re defining “speech community” as never having a size greater than one.
I think by “language” you mean “idiolect.” From whence, “their *own* language.” Not their native tongue, but their own idiosyncratic manner of speech. It’s a tautology. One’s own way of speaking is by definition correct for oneself in that moment. By one definition.
No, I mean their own speech variety. We all speak dialects, and one is not more valid than another.
Yes, I got that. I was agreeing with you.
🙂
I was trying to explain it to the other commenters.
I did not get that you were agreeing with me, and I admit, I thought it was weird that you knew the word idiolect and still didn’t get the point!
Thanks! Sorry I was unclear… that’s my own dysfluency, sometimes! ;-D
Thanks, Now. It’s nice to hear that.
This comic strip has definitely helped me come to terms with maternal and religious abuse that I had been denying or ignoring for most of my life.
Still not sure how to deal with that.
(Said religious mom just texted.)
Are both Walky and Charles’ shoelaces undone in the first panel?
Omg, yes.
The disease is hereditary.
The shoelace doesn’t fall far from the shoe.
Or something like that.
That’s so awesome. I hadn’t noticed that!
It will be sad/interesting to see Walkie taking the place, occupied by Sal, of The Rejected Children.
What was Amber supposed to say, Linda, “Thanks so much for insulting me to my face while paying for my lunch”
Linda: Tes.
Kill her with kindness (and politesse). An opportunity to imply, “you have no power over me.”
I agree with everything before “with”
You know, the Walkerton parents have unexpectedly shown up on campus for unexplained reasons, and now they are going to be there for at least an additional day. I can’t help feeling that there’s another shoe to drop. Don’t have any idea what it is yet, but …
Somewhere above, I had meant to say that mending fences may be the reason that they appeared out of nowhere.
They gave notice they were coming to visit, information which walkys adhd deleted, so its not unexpected. It is weird given winter break wasn’t that long ago, it’s been a couple weeks max.
Walky might should have expected it, but we did not. Unless you expected it.
w-what was that
a few days ago I was saying Linda’s hostile words towards Amber were understandable from the point of view that she views Amber as the unhinged violent person who stabbed her child and never suffered any consequences for it.
now she’s expecting Amber to say thank you??
I really thought Linda lack of civility was consistent for her, but now she expects Amber to be civil in the face of open hostility? huh???
Unfortunately, that’s incredibly consistent with the way people like Linda behave. They get to do and say whatever they want, no matter how wrong or uncalled for it is, and everyone else has to be grateful to even exist near them. If they suffer consequences, it’s persecution. If they persecute, it’s normal conversation.
I mean, if hypothetically I am being nasty to someone on purpose, it’s to drive them away. I thought making Amber leave without another word was the purpose of being mean to her
Yes, but Amber should have thanked Linda for the privilege, because the octopus that lives in Linda’s head told her so.
‘Tis gonna end in tears
wait…they…they finished the meal?? i had to go back to make sure i hadn’t missed a strip. the last we saw, there was LITERAL screaming happening. the last we saw, walky had just brought up lucy to his mom and then said he was “breaking up” with amber. and then…they all just……continued the outing?? they let all of that just go and blow over and they sat there and waited to order and for the food to arrive and then finished the meal????? and apparently – judging by today’s strip – had a decent time?? like, they made conversation after that? and they still, i guess, actually think walky’s dating amber? they didn’t question it further??? THEY FINISHED THE MEAL???
You missed the strip where the Green Goblin explodes the window, flies in on his glider, and screams “FINISH IT!” at everybody?
well, they were at galasso’s, meal-screaming is not an abnormal activity there
If you want to be noticed you need to out-scream the boss first.
post-timeskip the characters are acting more and more like sitcom caricatures and less like fully fleshed three dimensional people like they were written before.
Everyone gets over shit really easily and quickly, as the plot demands it, but at the expense of any of the character development feeling organic at all
My headcanon is that after Walky “broke up” with her, Amber retreated into her phone and said nothing further for the rest of the meal, but nonetheless stayed because she had been promised free pizza. Or else grabbed all the breadsticks and left early.
Maybe Danny swooped in with some meal-rescuing smalltalk patter. He’s seen the Amber “fake girlfriend” routine before, and knows how vital securing parental approval can be. I’d bet Charles was happy to paper over the prior conversation by re-engaging with Danny about school or work or music or somesuch.
Walky was probably too mortified by the earlier screaming to say much more. Didn’t quite have the courage to call attention to himself by leaving early. Just tried to make himself small and unnoticeable.
I mean, I think it makes sense. More sense than anyone stalking off. “To stay in pain is to avoid pain,” as the old Al-Anon saying goes.
My headcanon is also that with Mrs. Walkerton’s “trying” to sue Amber’s mom 30 times, the Walkerton family wound up having to pay judicial sanctions that wound up covering Amber’s remaining tuition for the year. That’s the story I tell myself and I’m sticking to it! 😉
This is giving me some serious anxiety. Linda is dangling the prospect of a loving, accepting parent in front of Sal because she got with an Acceptable White Boy. But the moment something goes wrong, the moment Sal does something Linda doesn’t like it will be back to the Scapegoat child hole for her.
Sure looks like it.
see this is the problem with being civil with family you hate or who hate you
if you do it “well” you just get to deal with them for longer
Gee Linda, it’s almost as if you insulted her to her face several times and she’s eager to get away from you.
Danny’s “He’s a good egg” class feature is truly turning the world upside-down
Oof, as someone who went from being the Scapegoat in my mother’s eyes to the Golden Child in more recent years… Sal’s face in that last panel, the hope of it, is breaking my heart. Because I don’t trust that this will end well. But even if she *does* become the favorite child, that’s also a shitty position to be in, in a different way. Do I hope Linda is going to turn over a new leaf? Yes. Do I trust it? Hell no.
Yeah.
Been there.
The lighting looks like it’s later in the day than I thought. If this were a late lunch, Linda’s excuse to get out of lunch with Lucy would be a conspicuously unaddressed issue. Looking more like it was an early dinner.
I wonder where they went for lunch. Probably Dave and Busters.
*walter white screaming jpg* NOOOO SAL !!! DON’T GIVE INTO THE MOTRHERLY LOVE YOU’VE CRAVED YOUR WHOLE LIFE !!!! SAAAL !!! SAAAAAL !!!!!!!!
Having been in Sal’s usual position my entire life, I concur. The handful of times my mom put on a normal-mom mask just made me want to run away screaming because it was wrong and all the bad stuff was still there under the surface. Today’s strip makes me want to crawl out of my own skin, the visceral “NOPE” reaction is still so strong. I hope Sal sees the trap and avoids it.
parents who restrict their love behind conditions are cruel. I’m sorry you had to go through that <3
UGH, she’s so happy, it’s so unfair because I can feel the other shoe about to drop.
So who wants to take bets on what it’ll be? Someone on Patreon suggested it could be them running into Marcie.
Marcie is a good guess. I’m thinking it could also be whatever issue brought them here on campus in the first place.
I’m seeing a surprising amount of Linda defense in the comments. It’s certainly possible that she’s not the monster that most parents in this comic have been so far. It’s more probable, I think, that she is a mixture of monster and normal-ass person, like most real-world monsters. But I’d just like to point out one thing: agreeableness does not equate to, like… goodness, or respect.
Of course Linda is being agreeable now; Sal is doing the things Linda always wanted her to do. This is how abusers operate: If you conform to their vision for you, they can be quite nice. But it’s conditional. If abusers were horrible all the time, it wouldn’t be so hard to get people out of toxic relationships. I’m not saying Linda is an abuser (currently), I’m just saying it’s entirely reasonable to keep your guard up even if she’s being nicer than expected. Sal is right to be apprehensive in the final panel.
If people saw videos of Hitler or Stalin in home environments without knowing who they are they’d think they are just some nice middle-aged guys.
Just because an abuser is being nice at the moment doesn’t mean they won’t fly off the handle the moment things don’t go their way. Like this is some goldfish memory situation. She’s been tearing into Amber and Walky just a couple of strips ago! Not to mention her reaction to Lucy a bit further back.
Be nice to goldfish. They can probably get to the third panel of a comic strip without forgetting the first and second one exist.
Goldfish can remember things for months.
Is this the first time Linda has called her daughter Sal rather than Sally? If so, that’s probably a little jarring on top of everything else making Sal feel like she’s crossed into the Twilight Zone.
It is indeed.
…Sal’s being remarkably generous to Amber right now. More than I expected, given how much of Sal’s family status and perceived worth was riding on a “successful” family dinner. I wonder how or whether Amazi-Girl will address it with Sal later at roller derby.
Well Amber certainly upped Sal’s stocks by devaluing Walky’s.
Please Sal, do not break up with Danny in a attempt to rebel against your mother!!
Probably too late for anyone to reply to this, just putting it here so if I’m right I can prove I called it.
Amber was under a fuckload of stress at a few points during that dinner.
Amber has been using that stress and anger on the roller derby rink instead of going out as Amazi-girl lately.
There is not currently a game of roller derby going down that I’m aware of.
Conclusion: Amber is not who wandered off. Our girl has had a relapse.
I was under the impression that Amazi-Girl is the alter who plays roller derby, and that Amber and Amazi-Girl are still as dual/multiple as usual, with headMike no longer asserting himself quite so much up there.
…But yeah, what you say wouldn’t surprise me one bit.
I don’t think headMike is an alter in the traditional sense, but rather a kind of entity called an introject. (ask DID havers over here about them, I don’t know that much)
Oh, yes, that’s right. Sorry! Thanks for the correction.
I had heard of them, under a different term… escapes me at the moment.
I wonder if there’s any parallel between introjects and voices. So much to learn about communities of mind!
Yeah I worded that a bit off. More of a relapse of Super-heroics than of her DID.
For anyone else experiencing work anxiety right now, as I am, I’ll play Dog Lo-Fi on the hacked office PA system.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lr6DxfVOjXg