Radio was the original streaming service. Then they figured out how to make it do pictures. then they figured out how to make it clearer by connecting a bunch of houses to one big antenna with a wire. Then finally someone had the idea to just hook up the wire and skip the transmitter/antenna part, which let them have way more options.
The sliding timescale is already in effect, it just now extends to culture references that the author understands remaining relevant longe than they actually did.
No, no, hell no, I refuse to accept Scrubs as being “old.” I used to watch reruns of it all the time on Comedy Central when I was a teen. I’m not even thirty yet! Nope, negative, I refuse!
Since I know it’s hard to read tone from text, in case it wasn’t clear, I’m being intentionally hyperbolic in a joking way. I don’t actually care that much if a pop-culture thing from my youth is considered “old.” Well, okay, I care a little.
I was old enough to drink (legally) when Scrubs premiered. Get off my dang lawn! *shakes fist at the sky*
But I don’t really worry too much about dating myself. Thanks to the magic of reruns and recordings, my pop culture memory extends back several decades before I was actually born.
As someone just out of college, I can testify: I watched Scrubs about a year back, thoroughly enjoyed it, have a couple just-older friends who like it, but the MAJORITY of people my age either haven’t heard of it, don’t care, or at best have watched an episode or seen a clip. To see someone like Walky bring it up is eyebrow-raising.
Yeah I’m assuming this is referring to the episode where she’s organizing her CDs with her boyfriend and says “I love U2.” And ofc it goes exactly how you’d expect.
Anyway this is a delightfully nostalgic reference. That show was my comfort media in college!
it’d be pretty upsetting/humiliating for lucy to be dumped after saying “love” but suppose it’s best to rip off the bandage. tho other than some rebounds/casual relationships i can imagine it causing subconscious/psychological problems in a next relationship
Walky obviously doesn’t hate Lucy. What he hates is serious emotional attachments. He’s incapable of healthy emotional conversations with himself or anybody else. Eventually he’s going to have to face having actual, serious emotions.
If he keeps running away from relationships when he starts developing emotions he’ll never progress as an adult human being. Breaking up with Lucy before having to deal with emotions wouldn’t be a good thing for him.
Walky isn’t running away from Lucy because he’s starting to develop feelings — the problem here is that she has intense feelings, and he really doesn’t.
Breaking up with Lucy because their feelings and goals and intensity are totally mismatched is ok for both of them.
It’s ok, but it also shouldn’t be necessary. Feelings develop over time. This is why you don’t usually drop the love word a week into a relationship. It forces a crisis point where it seems you have to reciprocate or break up.
telling someone to stay with someone else DESPITE their feelings not matching just because “love may develop over time” is absolutely godawful dating advice. especially in college when it’s a perfect time to date around and figure yourself out before making serious emotional commitments.
Is there no room in your mind for “I’d like to see where this goes”? Not every relationship has to be a soulmates situation before the wheels even hit the ground.
Wow. Everyone in this section of the thread needs to calm the fuck down.
Is it okay for Walky to break up with Lucy over this? Yes.
Does Walky need to break up with Lucy over this? No.
Walky can stay with Lucy, or not. Either is fine – that isn’t the issue.
The issue is Walky avoiding the issue entirely. He needs to face it, not hide from it. Whatever way he ends up going is his choice (and potentially Lucy’s as well), and it isn’t even necessarily a binary choice (backing off the exclusivity would be a middle option, for example). The issue is that Walky needs to actually address what happened by talking to Lucy about it.
As for Dorothy, as noted below, when Dorothy did this, Walky specifically tried to blow it off and not address it – and that backfired.
I mostly agree, except it doesn’t seem like he’s avoiding the issue. This seems like he knows there’s a different level of affection, that’s ok, but that Lucy doesn’t realize there’s a different level of affection, and he’s looking for advice on how to talk to her about that because whether or not he’s comfortable staying in the relationship, he wants to treat her right.
He’s not really hiding from it. He’s come seeking advice on how to deal with it. That’s completely different. He was knocked off balance and it’s probably only been a few hours – still the same day at least.
This is a tricky one, since saying he doesn’t love her is likely to feel like rejecting her and lead to a breakup even if he doesn’t want that.
Did anyone seem un-calm to you? I thought it was a fairly chill exchange.
I’m inclined to agreed with thejeff, Walky really doesn’t seem to be hiding. He’s honestly doing something pretty mature and asking for advice/help with a problem he’s facing, instead of doing that thing #Dudes constantly do and pretending he can handle something on his own, which tends to lead to getting overwhelmed and messing things up.
Um… I really didn’t think anyone was being intense here? Well, maybe one person, who was moreso down below, but your reply was like a level of intensity that wasn’t here before.
Not only did Walky come seeking advice, but he specifically CHOSE to come to Dorothy. That’s actually important, here, since as the strip just prior to this one shows, Walky’s more perceptive than he wants folks to know about. He knew that he needed to make clear what kind of advice he was looking for when approaching Dorothy; he also correctly assessed Lucy’s anti-Billie/Jennifer vibe.
For someone who prides himself on being shallow, that’s some pretty solid insight. And in the end, he chooses to go to the one person who will absolutely not cut him any slack on the matter. In some ways, he’s a bit like someone who seeks out a workout partner to keep himself on track with a program, because he knows he’ll drop it after a week if he’s on his own.
That’s not a thing Walky has done in the past. It’s not even a thing he’s doing now.
He and Dorothy broke up because of her time management problems, not because he ran away. He and Amber broke up because of their trauma over Mike’s death, not because he ran away.
Yeah, he tries to avoid difficult emotional conversations, but he’s not incapable of having them and it certainly doesn’t keep him from relationships.
What he has had is two significant relationships, at least one of which he was seriously invested in, blow up on him in the past few months, for reasons mostly outside of his control. That could make anyone a little wary.
Nope. It doesn’t matter as much if Walky doesn’t love her yet. Emotions can change with time. What does matter is honesty and he clearly isn’t ready to talk with Lucy because that might be unpleasant. That’s the problem. For me he’d only have til the end of the day to talk to her or he’s starts dipping into jerk territory. But let’s give him a week to figure this out. Love or not he should talk to Lucy about this. He knows he’s not as invested. The fact he can’t talk to her means he’s afraid of the outcome.
And came looking to the one person whom he absolutely had to know would tell him what he needs to do. Sure, he’s arguing and resisting, but he could’ve just gone to, say, Joe, and gotten some reassurance that he shouldn’t worry about it.
I feel like maybe people didn’t understand my comment. I get that this just happened. I do think Walky has time to figure things out and even going to Dorothy is a good move. I just don’t think he has a lot of time. He knows Lucy has expectations on their relationship that he doesn’t. Every day he waits around trying to figure himself out while she believes he loves her takes advantage of her. He already missed an opportunity to correct things. How long is acceptable?
I personally don’t even think they should be together to begin this cause neither were willing to start the relationship. Walky was oblivious and Lucy was too shy. Dorothy started this relationship, which at least to me set them up for failure. This feels more like an arrangement of convenience (Walky literally described it as a taco he didn’t know he could order) than a relationship to me. Maybe everything will workout fine in the end and I’m just being dumb, but like it’s already starting to crack after a week.
I don’t, I prefer an 80% nitrogen, 19% oxygen, 1% other gasses atmosphere. 100% oxygen makes bombs out of almost anything flammable, even stuff that doesn’t usually burn, like diamonds.
So true! And definitely what humans say all the time, when we are not basking in our wealth of internal organs. (Liver and a spleen? What will we humans think of next!)
One moment, I need to go regulate my temperature by panting and/or by secreting liquid through my disgusting pores.
I think him getting angry about this is worse than just a no. Like if he said “no” I still think they’d have potential to get on track or readjust. Frustration is a bad sign.
Eh, Walky has a LOT of symptoms of a twice exceptional ADHD kid. I can’t remember if he’s diagnosed, but either way, he might actually have difficulty regulating emotions like anger and frustration. Everybody gets frustrated when their words are misunderstood. Neurotypical people can tamp that feeling down with reason, cool their jets, and look the situation over reasonably. ADHD strips people of that mechanism and so everything feels raw and unfiltered all the time. It’s why ADHD tends to lead to what many perceive as unreasonable outbursts.
I think he can be frustrated at the situation without being angry Lucy. Telling someone you love them after a week shows immaturity. It also puts your partner in an uncomfortable position. It’s pretty understandable for him to be annoyed and he’s not taking it out on Lucy.
It’s been almost exactly 1 week. Lucy’s been crushing of him for months, but they’ve only been dating for a week.
This is way early to be dropping the love word and that wouldn’t normally be a problem except for the sitcom bit.
They’ve known each other, or at least known of each other, since Jenifer, was transferred to a different dorm last semester. I don’t know how long they were hanging out together, but I think it happened sometime during the timeskip.
I’ve gotten the impression that he likes Lucy as a friend and as a person but it really feels to me that the only reason he’s dating her is because he thinks he’s supposed to (because she likes him and because Dorothy told him he should ask her out). Idk, just comparing how he’s acted with her versus how he acted with Dorothy and Amber, he hasn’t demonstrated affection for Lucy the way he demonstrated affection for either of them and we don’t have any other examples of Walky demonstrating affection yet, so it seems like that affection might not be there.
Probably not, but he likes her.
And NOW I feel like Lucy isn’t at the same emotional maturity level to correctly handle Walky saying no, but at the same time, I think she is, but in a different way?
Like she’d worry if she forced him into saying it.
Walky is going to dance around the issue for a while, huh? I’m secretly hoping this with Walky telling Dorothy that he still loves her and that he doesn’t love lucy.
It is important to communicate (although sucky if there is lingering feelings), though at the same time it’d be nice if more platonic friends casually started saying ‘i love you’ to each other without it being a ‘huge’ deal and such, maybe the next gen will lol
But they also already get repurposed for each other. Mostly like and love cover the intensity, but they also double in some cases for the distinction between romantic and non-romantic. Not in all cases though.
Well, just because you have not noticed it causing confusion yet doesn’t mean it hasn’t or that it never will. and even if it hasn’t, that doesn’t mean it doesn’t cause pain.
Especially if you have a friend who is secretly into you.
Lots of things could, theoretically, cause confusion or harm. Many of those things don’t even do the amount of good that sharing love with people can do. That doesn’t mean they’re “horrible” things that should be avoided.
You sound like you may have some baggage around this issue. That’s understandable, but the idea that “love” has to be exclusive to romantic relationships is, frankly, silly. I mean, what if you press into it? Can a parent love their kid? Can a kid love their parent? Is that different than the love that could be between a married couple? Why can’t there be love for friends, as well?
I love my friends. My friends love me. There are feelings of fondness that “like” may not convey.
I agree with the above, and would add that even within the specific context of romance we use ‘love’ to describe a broad variety of things. The romantic feelings that are nurtured between long-term partners and the unrequited romantic attraction that can exist between close friends are really not the same thing.
I love my brother. I do not want to start a romantic relationship with my brother. Neither he nor I has ever been confused by each other’s meaning. There is more than one type of love that is not the same as like.
It isn’t our job to manage the possibility of unspoken feelings. If I have a friend who I say “I love you” to and this causes them pain, I expect them to speak up about it. I’m not okay with being expected to be psychic.
That said, I say “I love you” to my friends all the time. I do love them, very much. They’re my family, the people I choose, and the people who I feel the most affection for. I have never had a situation where a friend confused themselves for a romantic partner of mine as a result of me saying I loved them.
Surprised walky watches what is – I reluctantly admit – a fairly old sitcom at this point instead of just more cartoons.
I guess it’s probably on netflix or whatever.
Now of course, since Dorothy isn’t real, her feelings don’t exist and can’t be hurt. The stakes couldn’t be lower. I just think it’s silly to go around saying who is or isn’t in love with someone else, when they’ve stated otherwise.
I don’t mean to put words in shrub’s mouth, but I think the intent was more like answering “I like that purple colour” with “It’s really much closer to blue.” It’s not that Lucy’s feelings are invalid, just that the words she’s using to describe them are imprecise.
According to who? If that is what Lucy considers to be love, and she says she loves someone, it really isn’t for external sources to decide that isn’t what’s going on.
It’s infantilizing and a little odd to consider yourself more of an expert on someone’s emotions than they themselves are.
How does Dorothy not love Walky? I know emotions are by nature variable between individuals but she felt emotions for him she defined as love. How is that not valid? I think she loves him even now cause he was the first guy to actually fully believe in her dream to one day be president.
While I do not agree with shrub, I think they are suggesting that neither Dorothy nor Lucy took the time to be sure of their feelings. IE, that you can’t know if you only love someone after a week of dating.
I think Dorothy kind of did. She at least seemed much more aware of her feelings and why they were there than we’ve seen from Lucy – whose take hasn’t really changed from before they were even dating.
She also said it with intention, on her own initiative, rather than dropping it in response to misunderstood comment from him.
have been reading the archive and this seemed relevant:
Dotty: No matter what happens, it’s possible I’ll always love you
Walky: So, the lying’s begun already
Dotty: Ha ha. No, I mean “love” can mean a lot of things. I love a lot of people
Not sure why you say that about Dorothy, but I kind of agree about Lucy. Seems to me that she’s more mistaking infatuation or a crush for love. Dorothy’s felt more real. We saw it grow over time and she even talked about why she felt that way. Lucy seems to have been looking for an excuse to drop the word and it’s not really clear why or if her feelings have changed since she first started crushing on him.
It is perfectly fine, but how to have that conversation with Lucy, when she thinks he’s already declared his love for her? And how to do it without breaking up?
What I find interesting is how he reacted back then when talking to someone for advice and being asked the exact same question “Do you love her?”. Really shows how different his feelings for Dorothy then were compared to for Lucy now.
The emotions are complicated but I don’t think that’s really what the issue is here. The more accurate question isn’t if he loves her but if he’s anywhere near the level of affection or investment Lucy has shown to him. The answer to that is very simple. It’s no and Walky knows it’s no. He may still need to sort out what he feels for Lucy, but he is not there and he should be able to answer that. It’s only been a few weeks. He doesn’t need to know what love is or if he feels it to just be honest with Lucy.
I do agree to an extent, they are definitely not on the same page.
I remain unconvinced he is indifferent to her or something like some paint it, but Lucy is definitely approaching this from a point of inexperience and coming on strong, Walky’s lightly experienced between Dorothy and Amber, and Dorothy is the one here who has been around the block with committed relationships.
I do hope he can sort his head out and figure out what he wants here.
yeah he’s definitely not indifferent but he wasn’t exactly active in pursuing her or even, like, all that interested before she was explicitly stated to be an option
I know dudes are oblivious (it’s me. I’m dudes) but if someone was hanging out with me all the time like that I would at least ask someone else if they thought this person was into me
admittedly I would then chicken out of doing anything but that’s a separate tragedy
I don’t think he’s indifferent either, just not on the same wavelength with Lucy. The problem is that he needs to recognize that or they can’t address it. Worst case scenario is he strings Lucy on while he figures his emotions out and depending on the outcome this gets worse.
I don’t feel like Dorothy is being fair to Walky at all here, because it’s really not as simple as “Do you love Lucy?”.
1) Walky and Lucy just started dating. So, he might only like her, which is fine. You don’t have to instantly fall in love with every person you date.
2) Walky might actually love Lucy but is not yet ready to say this out loud. This is fine. It is very different to admit that you love someone to yourself, to that person, or to another uninvolved person. It involves different levels of vulnerability and trust.
3)Walky might not even be sure of how he feels yet. In which case, he can’t honestly answer this question with a “yes” or a “no”.
Walky isn’t super mature, but he was mature enough to recognize he isn’t comfortable with Lucy straight up saying she loves him. And he came to someone he trusted for advice. He is also telling Dorothy, in his own weird, kinda immature Walky way that he needs help navigating this complicated situation, and Dorothy is being really reductive by just boiling it down to simply “Do you love her? Yes or no?” situation when it really isn’t all that simple.
Yeah there’s absolutely no reason to be slapping him with that “Back you into the corner and demand a binary yes/no answer” stuff. Cuz like, what if he says no? Is she gonna shame him for immediately falling in Disney movie love with Lucy the second he was shoved at her?
I don’t disagree, but in the interest of fairness to Dorothy I’ll point one thing out: she didn’t *actually* demand a yes or no. She didn’t say, “Do you love her or not?” As currently phrased, the question is open-ended enough for “I don’t know” to be perfectly valid.
I think it’s the repetition that makes it feel demanding, to me. Repeating the entire question, verbatim, especially when it’s so short and loaded, makes it feel like the asker won’t accept any response other than a binary “Yes” or “No”, and answering “No” will lead the asker to badger the target until they say “Yes” anyway.
At least, that’s how it’s always gone for me with this sort of question, so that may be some personal sensitivity bleeding through.
oh there’s definitely an implicit pressure there, for sure, even if she didn’t actually say it. it’s the fact that it is, technically, only implied that pushes me into the “well, let’s see where she’s going with this” camp.
On the other hand, Walky’s dodging the question with his first answer and Dorothy knows him well. I don’t think she’s pushing for a binary answer, she’s pushing to get him to address it.
And he came to her about it, so he’s going to have to deal with a bit of emotional vulnerability.
I agree with this comment but i play devil advocate. Maybe i give Dotothy too many benefits of the doubt but maybe (again) she went good path but on wrong foot and she is trying go with therapeutic “my Answer dont matter what answer is in you?” Or Dorothy is tired with Walky lazy BS (in her opinion) and go hard on him so he cant slim away from this.
What are the chances a modern eighteen year old can name drop Elliot Reid in casual conversation? Like, am I to believe that Walky went out of his way to stream Scrubs when there are cartoons to watch?
It’s not important. I just don’t think my 23 year old brother ever really watched Scrubs.
It’s the “dropping it into casual conversation” part that raises eyebrows. In this case, we know that Walky and Dorothy spent a lot of time together, so we can headcanon that they watched or discussed Scrubs at some point and therefore he knows she’ll get the reference, rather than giving him the bewildered look that I would. (Everything I know about Scrubs I have learned from DoA alt-texts and occasional mentions in Shortpacked!, I think. Mainly that Willis thinks it’s the only show to do montages while a song plays.) It’s like Professor Brock pre-emptively outlawing Back to the Future references. Sure, a fair number of 18-year-olds have probably seen those by now ancient films, and we can headcanon that the professor endured enough references in the last 30-some years to have got pissed off at them and never noticed when they stopped being made, but I still have my doubts as to how many kids in that class would actually have seen the film and remembered it enough to automatically make the link, or care enough to have commented on it if they had, as opposed to back in the late 80s when it was inescapable.
Yes, the films are available, but there’s a hell of a lot else available too, so it’s perfectly possible not to see them, even if most people will know the title and a couple of things about it that are constantly referenced (flying skateboards, icky incestuous stuff, let’s make sure that rock’n’roll is due to a white person) without necessarily having seen them.
Thanks to headcanon, it’s not a big deal, but it does point to the wisdom of having invented Dexter and Monkey Master as a show, since that allows for pop culture references that don’t risk showing the author’s age.
As someone who still has cable (and is watching it still deteriorate daily in its programming), the BTTF trilogy, as well as all the Star Wars and Indiana Jones movies, seem to do a regular rotation on many channels that need cheap programming. If Walky’s parents kept their cable subscription I’m pretty sure he’d have seen many of these old programs.
I dunno what to tell ya – I see Scrubs and BTTF referenced online constantly. These may. be old, but they’re hardly obscure. When they’re available on streaming services, they’re often pretty far up in their categories. They play on regular tv channels all the time (whether that’s cable or satellite). Sure, it’s possible to not have seen it, but it’s super possible to see it and reference it, especially when it’s super popular and references/memes are everywhere.
– flying skateboards, yes. And people know the flying DeLorean.
– icky incestuous stuff: definitely shown as an icky bad idea, and an inkling that they’re related is a total dealbreaker for all concerned.
– White rock n roll could be a problem! If it helps, Marty didn’t write Johnny Be Good, he learned that song in the 80s, presumably from a Chuck Barry record. So Marty didn’t invent rock n roll, he just accidentally brought Chuck Barry’s own song to him, from after Chuck Barry created it. Chuck Barry still did all the work, Marty was just a messenger.
Anyway everything else you said stands, I just love me some Back to the Future ♡
Internet is everywhere these days but walky is also sorta a self insert of the author too? So it also would have a lot of what the author is into as well
according to some podcasts and interviews, apparently there are kids as young as ten watching the office. some eps might be ok but the more sexual/scandalous ones might be a bit much for someone at that age range versus 14+ lol
I think it’s less weird for Walky to have watched scrubs and MORE weird for him to reference scrubs. Like don’t get me wrong, Dorothy teed him up for it with the sitcom joke, but I tend to avoid making jokes/references to shows people might not know. Just feels weird that he so confidently said “oh she’d get this joke I’m making”. Maybe they watched it together though.
well there was apparently a recent tmobile ad with turk and jd’s actor so some ppl in the media would think they’re still relevant at least
Or even, he could’ve just simply seen a viral vid/just that particular scene/compilation or tiktoks of sitcom ‘i love yous’ and ppl being awkward about those
No, he came to her because she said the same thing to him and he has the foolish hope that she can explain what she meant so he can understand what Lucy means.
No, I don’t know why you’re not fair
I give you my love, but you don’t care
So what is right and what is wrong?
Gimme a sign
What is love?
Oh baby, don’t hurt me
Don’t hurt me
No more
I feel like this is a Thing for Dorothy, though I’m not sure why. I feel like likes to boil things down to a simple yes/no question, which is sometimes super helpful but in situations like this that are more nuanced it’s actually the opposite of helpful.
I think in this instance she’s just super uncomfortable since SHE might not be 100% over Walky, and she just told that she, the actual ex-girlfriend, is less jealousy-inducing than Walky’s sister from another mister. Gotta sting the ego a bit, especially after Joyce ignoring her for Joe and Becky calling her bland.
Is she trying to boil things down to a simple yes/no question?
It certainly seems to me that knowing where Walky stands on this is going to be helpful in giving advice and he hasn’t even given a nuanced complex answer yet.
Especially since this Yes-Or-No-Question strikes at the heart of Walky’s real issue here.
In a sense, it doesn’t really matter what his answer to the question is, because its his unwillingness to answer it that’s the problem that he needs to get past. What Walky needs to do is talk to Lucy and let her know what’s going on here, regardless of what his feelings for her actually are. But he’s not going to be able to do that with a metric ton of baggage weighing him down.
Even more helpful for Walky to know where Walky stands. What I’m getting from Dorothy is “you need to know the answer to that before you decide what to do.”
I guess the real question is what would you consider love?
I want to know what Love is.
I’ve heard that Love is all you need.
I’ve also heard that Love is a battlefield.
What is love? Baby don’t hurt me. Don’t hurt me. No more.
Some say love, it is a river that drowns the tender reed.
Some say love, it is a razor, that leaves your soul to bleed.
Some say love, it is a hunger, an endless aching need.
I say love, it is a flower, and you its only seed.
I generally assume anyone over the age of 18 is pretty much always doing taxes, even when it doesn’t look like they are. Anyone caught not doing taxes will have their age revoked.
Man, it must be difficult for those people who live in countries where their governments do their taxes. They must just have to pretend to do their taxes to keep their age.
There’s a little bit of leeway in Europe, mostly in the northern half. You don’t have to do as many taxes there, but you are strongly encouraged to make theory videos about The Legend of Zelda as a way of supplementing your age.
Yeah, but do those taxes tend to go somewhere other than the military, sports, and some rich man’s pocket? I’d totally pay more taxes if they went anywhere fucking useful.
Not that I’m ever not doing taxes. I’m a big grown-up adult who does mature things like that, and also uhhhh mortgage. Lots and lots of mortgage.
Almost like they are still leaving their teens behind them or something. Besides that, you are going to tell me that no “adults” have issues like this in their lives.
I don’t know what fantasy you live in but hopefully you’ll outgrow it.
An adult would never be in a relationship without already being in love?
An adult would never casually say they loved something about their girlfriend, not expecting that to be taken as a declaration of love?
Really not sure what Walky’s supposed to have done wrong here.
I think its useful here, though, because Walky’s resistance to address the L word is a big part of the problem he’s dealing with. Asking him a softer version of that question would get more of a response out of him, sure, but it’d also give him room to weasel away from addressing the core issue, which is what Dorothy’s insistence on this question is exposing.
‘Spose you’re right about that. I think it’s more of how much weight the word “love” usually carries. It’s probably like a couple of other commenters have said; he doesn’t know how he feels and whether or not that is love and it’s causing him emotional stress that kicks in his coping mechanism of “let’s not talk about it”.
I could see her asking different questions depending on if the response is, Yes, No, or I don’t know. But also given their previous history… the whole conversation is fraught.
How do you know what you are feeling is the same as what another person is feeling or talking about? Is it love, or is it a crush? Or something else, maybe something sinister? It would be really nice to have some metrics.
Fortunately, we can turn to a wise tiger to enlighten us. https://www.gocomics.com/calvinandhobbes/1986/02/16
A theory: Walky’s mom, seeing he was deeply unserious (and/or enjoyed comedies and had no interests in watching dramas) and wanting him to be a doctor, is the one who got him to watch Scrubs growing up.
*sigh* Walky, let me give you some advice that I’ve learned in my three decades of dating and relationships. if you have to THINK about whether or not you love someone, then the answer is a clear, resounding NO.
I should probably elaborate. Lucy, imo, popped the phrase too early. You’re correct in that very few people would definitely decide that they are in love within the first week of a relationship. That said, the fact that Walky’s instant reaction is “uh oh” is also very telling. It means that his feelings do not match Lucy’s, and in my experience that is usually a big warning sign for any relationship, budding or not. If even the initial attraction/infatuation stage is not enough for you to see yourself in a potential future with this person (assuming, of course, that this relationship is not something both partners have decided will be short-term or for fun only), then in my experience odds are fairly low that your opinion will improve. More than likely one partner is not really “feeling it”, but is reluctant to shoot the other down because they’re afraid of being alone or afraid of hurting the other’s feelings (you CAN deeply care for someone but not love them; I’ve actually seen my share of couples where one partner actually didn’t quite love the other, but they stuck with them because they felt they couldn’t do any better or that they’d never find someone more suitable.)
then again this is the girl who broke up with Walky just cause of grades, so maybe not the best person to ask this. But there is really very few people who Walky could rely on this. Hilariously, Jennifer would be the best one
This should end with them kissing. There haven’t been enough melodramatic romantic bombshells recently and it would be a great peak to dorothy’s “reckoning with her flaws” era
Something I’ve learned in my time is that different people have different expectations and ideas when it comes to dating. Some people view dating as basically a courting period, and will date multiple people to see which one sticks. It’s not necessarily girlfriend/boyfriend/SO, it’s just “let’s hang out and see if there’s chemistry”. Other people do view dating to be synonymous with being SO. I definitely view dating as being a SO and was blown away when my SO at the time told me that they viewed dating as that first category (keeping in mind that since in their view, we weren’t ‘just’ dating, we were obviously exclusive so there wasn’t another person involved.) I think Lucy views them dating like I do, exclusive, boyfriend/girlfriend, the works, while Walky seemed to be expecting it to be more “we chill, we hang, we get to know each other” hence why pulling out the ‘I love you’ so soon is giving him cold feet.
Also, another lesson I learned is only date people if you’re really interested in them. I once dated a guy because I felt bad for him, and I came to regret it. I think Walky mainly started dating Lucy because… well, because she was interested in him. It’s not a bad reason to start dating, but it’s clear their projectories and expectations are very different.
Even with an exclusive boy/girl friend approach to dating, a declaration of love a week in, before the third date is moving very fast and is likely to throw someone.
Even Lucy seemed to recognize this, because she didn’t say it out of the blue, but only after he said something that she misinterpreted as him saying it first.
She’s definitely more infatuated than he is, but that’s not necessarily fatal to a relationship. Forcing the issue like this, even unintentionally, might be.
I’ll admit that, for me? If I’m interested enough to be exclusive and dating someone, I probably would tell them I love them within a week or two. However, I would also need to know the person and be good friends with them for a long time before getting to that point.
It should be discussed, but it’s also usually pretty what someone’s expectations are. And in college relationships especially where you often spend a ton of time together without formal dates, number of dates is a bad metric to use. I remember one such relationship where we jokingly realized we’d just had our first “date” about a year into the relationship.
Like, I think Ruth and Jennifer went on one date, but that was definitely a relationship.
Haven’t they only been dating for about two weeks? That’s way too early to be dropping the L-bomb. I would also freak out if I was Walky. Loved scrubs btw. One of my favorite sitcoms.
She thinks he said it first. And they were friends for a long period in which Lucy was already crushing on him. So from her perspective things have been going on for a long time.
Was it a long period? Didn’t they meet near the end of the last semester? I’m guessing it’s probably around February in their time now so they only knew each other for maybe three months at max(not counting the winter break). That wouldn’t be that long.
Counterpoint, College time feels super compressed, like years are happening in weeks. Especially in the first semester or two before you get used to it. It’s often the first time living away from home and with these people so you’re seeing friends all day in different circumstances, rather just within contained moments like school or sports. So a few months does feel like a huge amount of time.
At least that’s how I remember it and I’ve known others who felt the same way.
Maybe Dorothy wasn’t the right person to go to for this, but given how annoyed Sal got at Walky and Amber dancing around each other, I can see why he might not consider her an option. Amber? She’d probably give good advice if Walky could get a serious answer out of her–which is a big if. (Plus, they didn’t really end on good terms.) Joyce? No, just no. Becky? Not really on Walky’s radar. (Besides, I’m not sure this is in Becky’s wheelhouse anyway since she and Dina are all butterflies and rainbows.) Dina? Again, not really someone Walky would consider a close friend.
Sorry Walky, but I think talking with Dorothy is really your only option.
whyyyyyy are there ppl saying he shouldn’t break up with her over this??? “it may turn into love” I mean yeah if you force yourself to be around someone long enough chances are you might gain some deep affection for them but uhhhh staying with someone who’s intense feelings don’t match your own is a bad idea. this is college dating not an arranged marriage, Walky shouldn’t make it work w Lucy just to avoid making her feel bad. I feel like folks suggesting he stay with her don’t understand that they’re advocating for Walky to just like gaslight himself.
Uh, because that’s not what people are saying? Like you referenced in your first comment, it’s about intensity. If Walky didn’t want to be in a relationship with Lucy, he should absolutely break up with her. But one person having stronger feelings in a relationship than the other, especially at a very early stage? That’s hardly a death blow. This is more a communication issue first; if they manage a conversation about it, and that leads to a breakup, fair enough, but it’s not a foregone conclusion.
I can appreciate where you’re coming from but people shouldn’t stay together if their feelings don’t match, even if it’s just the early stages. What is even bringing them together at that point? Obligation? A fear of hurting feelings? Plenty of relationships end after a few days or a week, that’s just how it shakes out sometimes. You should never ever *try* to *make* your feelings match or simply hope they do eventually. Recipe for disaster.
Human relationships don’t work like the fucking Fusion Dance from Dragonball. You don’t have to make sure your power levels are identical before you even start, that’s absolute nonsense.
You can like someone, and they can like you more. You are still both brought together by your feelings; that doesn’t seem hard to figure out. You shouldn’t try to force your feelings, but you’re also allowed to let them develop.
I’ve resolved plenty of em, and like someone said earlier yes talking about it helps. Just baffled why people think it’s good for Lucy for her to be with someone who doesn’t see her the same way. It’s going to set a bad precedent for any future relationships.
It might not be! But that’s a decision they should make after a conversation, and either way they decide could turn out fine. Obviously they shouldn’t stay together if their apparent feelings continue, but there’s no harm in staying together while Walky evaluates his own feelings… provided they’re both aware that’s what’s happening and are both okay with it. Lucy just needs to be aware that Walky doesn’t feel as strongly about her at this time, and choose for herself whether or not she’s okay with staying in a lopsided relationship for a while to see if things develop.
The wrong way to handle it is to pretend this never happened and hope his feelings eventually catch up. The right way is to have an honest talk about it and see if she still wants to continue the relationship knowing that he doesn’t feel the same way yet.
Walky: *blinks his eyes slightly longer than usual*
Someone with the patience of an ADHD mayfly: wow I can’t believe he’s keeping his eyes shut to avoid being a grown-up, really says something about society
Ok, hear me out, Walky asks two people for advice at the same time, to get several perspectives, because this isn’t as simple as Mary Worth Dorothy is saying. And the two people: Ken and Arnold.
Nah, if Dorothy was Mary Worth, she’d be saying “The answer’s simple – you should love her, so decide you do. I expect an invitation to the wedding, and I expect the wedding to be next week.”
It would be some nice woman who has a chance to date someone awesome (or, just not date someone awful), and Mary Worth would be saying, “No you should date Wilbur instead.”
Oh so he does love her but isn’t ready for that level of vulnerability or commitment. Has anyone told him that it’s normal and okay to feel that way? Like a therapist, maybe?
I think its more than her own curiosity. She is still very much stuck on him, and wants to not be, because it might upend her Big Plan. If he does in fact have feelings for Lucy, that will help Dorothy get over Walky.
How fucking hard is it for girls to grasp “I I DON’T FUCKING KNOW IF THE THING I FEEL IS LOVE OR NOT OR AFFECTION OR ANYTHING ELSE AND THAT ISN’T THE POINT OF THE ISSUE RIGHT NOW”
Not hard at all.
It’s harder when you think you’ve just heard them tell you they loved you. Lucy was happily letting things develop until the sitcom miscommunication happened.
at first i was thinking “wow how does this eighteen year old know about a brief story arc from the 2000s sitcom Scrubs” and then i remembered the sheer amount of television david walkerton has consumed
scrubs probably isn’t as far away as ppl born in like the 60s, but it wasn’t exactly a ‘lost media’/hipsters obscure thing
Ethan/Amber are super into transformers but i don’t really hear talk about the modern cartoons unless you go to that specific part of the internet/more likely to hear ppl talk about the micheal bay versions, or some toy ppl keeping up with collecting the new models
at the very least it’s probably more well known than the fictional Monkey Master he’s obsessed with lol
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no YOU’RE the Scrub(s)
We don’t want no scrubs
That’s an even older Scrubs.
hangin’ out the passenger side
of his best friend’s ride
trying to holla at me
Fun fact. Scrubs is actually older than Walky is now. Ya boy Walkman watched a lot of midday TBS or Comedy Central back in the 2010’s
Sadly, I fear we’re rapidly approaching a time when college students didn’t grow up watching sitcom reruns on cable television, either.
(We are all very, very old. And if anyone here isn’t I don’t want to hear about it. Remove yourself from my nonexistent lawn.)
“Cable? Was that one of the early streaming services?”
Radio was the original streaming service. Then they figured out how to make it do pictures. then they figured out how to make it clearer by connecting a bunch of houses to one big antenna with a wire. Then finally someone had the idea to just hook up the wire and skip the transmitter/antenna part, which let them have way more options.
And that’s where cable came from.
The sliding timescale is already in effect, it just now extends to culture references that the author understands remaining relevant longe than they actually did.
Man, remember when old people could afford lawns? And homes?
No, no, hell no, I refuse to accept Scrubs as being “old.” I used to watch reruns of it all the time on Comedy Central when I was a teen. I’m not even thirty yet! Nope, negative, I refuse!
Since I know it’s hard to read tone from text, in case it wasn’t clear, I’m being intentionally hyperbolic in a joking way. I don’t actually care that much if a pop-culture thing from my youth is considered “old.” Well, okay, I care a little.
_Scrubs_ is not old; _Dragnet_ is old.
The Tom Hanks / Dan Aykroyd movie? Dragnet is old.
I was old enough to drink (legally) when Scrubs premiered. Get off my dang lawn! *shakes fist at the sky*
But I don’t really worry too much about dating myself. Thanks to the magic of reruns and recordings, my pop culture memory extends back several decades before I was actually born.
As someone just out of college, I can testify: I watched Scrubs about a year back, thoroughly enjoyed it, have a couple just-older friends who like it, but the MAJORITY of people my age either haven’t heard of it, don’t care, or at best have watched an episode or seen a clip. To see someone like Walky bring it up is eyebrow-raising.
Another fun fact, the word ‘scrub’ as slang is way older than any of us, meaning ‘a small or insignificant person’ since the 1500s.
He’s no superman.
Thanks for reminding me who Elliot Reid is – I was struggling with that reference!
Yeah I’m assuming this is referring to the episode where she’s organizing her CDs with her boyfriend and says “I love U2.” And ofc it goes exactly how you’d expect.
Anyway this is a delightfully nostalgic reference. That show was my comfort media in college!
Walky…my boy…you might need to breakup with Lucy.
I’ve been saying that since they started dating. Prior to that I was saying “you probably shouldn’t date Lucy”
No one ever listens, but we could learn a lot from you.
If Lucy was not so “Joyce” in her dating goals, it might have been a decent casual relationship. Buuuuuut.
Yeah! Joyce and Walky? I can’t imagine that working out.
Not in this timeline, but in the Roomies universe they were different enough to get married and have kids.
“That’s the Joke”.
it’d be pretty upsetting/humiliating for lucy to be dumped after saying “love” but suppose it’s best to rip off the bandage. tho other than some rebounds/casual relationships i can imagine it causing subconscious/psychological problems in a next relationship
Walky obviously doesn’t hate Lucy. What he hates is serious emotional attachments. He’s incapable of healthy emotional conversations with himself or anybody else. Eventually he’s going to have to face having actual, serious emotions.
If he keeps running away from relationships when he starts developing emotions he’ll never progress as an adult human being. Breaking up with Lucy before having to deal with emotions wouldn’t be a good thing for him.
Lucy isn’t just fodder for Walky’s growth.
Walky isn’t running away from Lucy because he’s starting to develop feelings — the problem here is that she has intense feelings, and he really doesn’t.
Breaking up with Lucy because their feelings and goals and intensity are totally mismatched is ok for both of them.
It’s ok, but it also shouldn’t be necessary. Feelings develop over time. This is why you don’t usually drop the love word a week into a relationship. It forces a crisis point where it seems you have to reciprocate or break up.
telling someone to stay with someone else DESPITE their feelings not matching just because “love may develop over time” is absolutely godawful dating advice. especially in college when it’s a perfect time to date around and figure yourself out before making serious emotional commitments.
Okay, but they’ve been dating for like six hours at this point.
Is there no room in your mind for “I’d like to see where this goes”? Not every relationship has to be a soulmates situation before the wheels even hit the ground.
Wow. Everyone in this section of the thread needs to calm the fuck down.
Is it okay for Walky to break up with Lucy over this? Yes.
Does Walky need to break up with Lucy over this? No.
Walky can stay with Lucy, or not. Either is fine – that isn’t the issue.
The issue is Walky avoiding the issue entirely. He needs to face it, not hide from it. Whatever way he ends up going is his choice (and potentially Lucy’s as well), and it isn’t even necessarily a binary choice (backing off the exclusivity would be a middle option, for example). The issue is that Walky needs to actually address what happened by talking to Lucy about it.
As for Dorothy, as noted below, when Dorothy did this, Walky specifically tried to blow it off and not address it – and that backfired.
I mostly agree, except it doesn’t seem like he’s avoiding the issue. This seems like he knows there’s a different level of affection, that’s ok, but that Lucy doesn’t realize there’s a different level of affection, and he’s looking for advice on how to talk to her about that because whether or not he’s comfortable staying in the relationship, he wants to treat her right.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Whoa.
What do you think you’re doing here, being all reasonable and not jumping to conclusions? This is the Internet!
He’s not really hiding from it. He’s come seeking advice on how to deal with it. That’s completely different. He was knocked off balance and it’s probably only been a few hours – still the same day at least.
This is a tricky one, since saying he doesn’t love her is likely to feel like rejecting her and lead to a breakup even if he doesn’t want that.
Did anyone seem un-calm to you? I thought it was a fairly chill exchange.
I’m inclined to agreed with thejeff, Walky really doesn’t seem to be hiding. He’s honestly doing something pretty mature and asking for advice/help with a problem he’s facing, instead of doing that thing #Dudes constantly do and pretending he can handle something on his own, which tends to lead to getting overwhelmed and messing things up.
Um… I really didn’t think anyone was being intense here? Well, maybe one person, who was moreso down below, but your reply was like a level of intensity that wasn’t here before.
Not only did Walky come seeking advice, but he specifically CHOSE to come to Dorothy. That’s actually important, here, since as the strip just prior to this one shows, Walky’s more perceptive than he wants folks to know about. He knew that he needed to make clear what kind of advice he was looking for when approaching Dorothy; he also correctly assessed Lucy’s anti-Billie/Jennifer vibe.
For someone who prides himself on being shallow, that’s some pretty solid insight. And in the end, he chooses to go to the one person who will absolutely not cut him any slack on the matter. In some ways, he’s a bit like someone who seeks out a workout partner to keep himself on track with a program, because he knows he’ll drop it after a week if he’s on his own.
That’s not a thing Walky has done in the past. It’s not even a thing he’s doing now.
He and Dorothy broke up because of her time management problems, not because he ran away. He and Amber broke up because of their trauma over Mike’s death, not because he ran away.
Yeah, he tries to avoid difficult emotional conversations, but he’s not incapable of having them and it certainly doesn’t keep him from relationships.
What he has had is two significant relationships, at least one of which he was seriously invested in, blow up on him in the past few months, for reasons mostly outside of his control. That could make anyone a little wary.
Maybe Walky doesn’t want to progress as an adult human being.
Because he’s not in love with her after a week of dating? Jumping the gun don’t you think?
Nope. It doesn’t matter as much if Walky doesn’t love her yet. Emotions can change with time. What does matter is honesty and he clearly isn’t ready to talk with Lucy because that might be unpleasant. That’s the problem. For me he’d only have til the end of the day to talk to her or he’s starts dipping into jerk territory. But let’s give him a week to figure this out. Love or not he should talk to Lucy about this. He knows he’s not as invested. The fact he can’t talk to her means he’s afraid of the outcome.
It’s still the same day and he’s come looking for advice on how to deal with it.
And came looking to the one person whom he absolutely had to know would tell him what he needs to do. Sure, he’s arguing and resisting, but he could’ve just gone to, say, Joe, and gotten some reassurance that he shouldn’t worry about it.
The incident happened at lunchtime. As of our last time reference 3 strips ago, it is approximately dusk (see lighting of last panel of https://www.dumbingofage.com/2023/comic/book-13/02-turning-saints-into-the-sea/kindasorta/), which in January would put us around 5:30-6pm. It has been a couple hours.
I feel like maybe people didn’t understand my comment. I get that this just happened. I do think Walky has time to figure things out and even going to Dorothy is a good move. I just don’t think he has a lot of time. He knows Lucy has expectations on their relationship that he doesn’t. Every day he waits around trying to figure himself out while she believes he loves her takes advantage of her. He already missed an opportunity to correct things. How long is acceptable?
I personally don’t even think they should be together to begin this cause neither were willing to start the relationship. Walky was oblivious and Lucy was too shy. Dorothy started this relationship, which at least to me set them up for failure. This feels more like an arrangement of convenience (Walky literally described it as a taco he didn’t know he could order) than a relationship to me. Maybe everything will workout fine in the end and I’m just being dumb, but like it’s already starting to crack after a week.
😗 Is this what humans call déjà vu?
This is definitely a human reaction, it is nothing like what a Zognoid would say. Who even likes Zognoids? Certainly not me, for I am a human.
Clearly. We never doubted your
̶Z̶o̶g̶n̶o̶i̶d̶n̶e̶s̶s̶humanity, your Excellency!I love breathing oxygen!
I don’t, I prefer an 80% nitrogen, 19% oxygen, 1% other gasses atmosphere. 100% oxygen makes bombs out of almost anything flammable, even stuff that doesn’t usually burn, like diamonds.
That, and breathing 100% oxygen for long periods can cause some not-so-pleasant side effects. 🙁
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK430743/
So true! And definitely what humans say all the time, when we are not basking in our wealth of internal organs. (Liver and a spleen? What will we humans think of next!)
One moment, I need to go regulate my temperature by panting and/or by secreting liquid through my disgusting pores.
Gosh. I love Earth!
Clearly that’s a no.
“not yet” is a perfectly legitimate answer tbh
I think him getting angry about this is worse than just a no. Like if he said “no” I still think they’d have potential to get on track or readjust. Frustration is a bad sign.
Eh, Walky has a LOT of symptoms of a twice exceptional ADHD kid. I can’t remember if he’s diagnosed, but either way, he might actually have difficulty regulating emotions like anger and frustration. Everybody gets frustrated when their words are misunderstood. Neurotypical people can tamp that feeling down with reason, cool their jets, and look the situation over reasonably. ADHD strips people of that mechanism and so everything feels raw and unfiltered all the time. It’s why ADHD tends to lead to what many perceive as unreasonable outbursts.
I think he can be frustrated at the situation without being angry Lucy. Telling someone you love them after a week shows immaturity. It also puts your partner in an uncomfortable position. It’s pretty understandable for him to be annoyed and he’s not taking it out on Lucy.
So I’m guessing that Walky *likes* Lucy but he’s not in love with her. Not like he was with Dorathy.
Or that’s my presumption anyway.
Maybe it can turn INTO love later on, but he’s not there yet I imagine.
That’s what I’m guessing too, and that seems like it’s not a simple answer.
i can’t imagine it’s been even a full month yet. At the very least walky doesn’t think it’s even the ‘third date’ yet either
It’s been almost exactly 1 week. Lucy’s been crushing of him for months, but they’ve only been dating for a week.
This is way early to be dropping the love word and that wouldn’t normally be a problem except for the sitcom bit.
They’ve known each other, or at least known of each other, since Jenifer, was transferred to a different dorm last semester. I don’t know how long they were hanging out together, but I think it happened sometime during the timeskip.
I’ve gotten the impression that he likes Lucy as a friend and as a person but it really feels to me that the only reason he’s dating her is because he thinks he’s supposed to (because she likes him and because Dorothy told him he should ask her out). Idk, just comparing how he’s acted with her versus how he acted with Dorothy and Amber, he hasn’t demonstrated affection for Lucy the way he demonstrated affection for either of them and we don’t have any other examples of Walky demonstrating affection yet, so it seems like that affection might not be there.
Probably not, but he likes her.
And NOW I feel like Lucy isn’t at the same emotional maturity level to correctly handle Walky saying no, but at the same time, I think she is, but in a different way?
Like she’d worry if she forced him into saying it.
Premature Emotional Vulnerability is nothing to be ashamed of, Walky. not uncommon. you know, one in five men–
Walky is going to dance around the issue for a while, huh? I’m secretly hoping this with Walky telling Dorothy that he still loves her and that he doesn’t love lucy.
Odds? Slime to none. Hopes? There are plenty.
“Slime to none” is my new favorite typo
I’m not a bad slime, slurp!
Of course he doesn’t love Lucy. He just said he wasn’t in a sitcom. *Laugh track explodes*
It is important to communicate (although sucky if there is lingering feelings), though at the same time it’d be nice if more platonic friends casually started saying ‘i love you’ to each other without it being a ‘huge’ deal and such, maybe the next gen will lol
That would be horrible. You’re already fortunate in English to have separate words for “like” and “love”– so use them!
But they also already get repurposed for each other. Mostly like and love cover the intensity, but they also double in some cases for the distinction between romantic and non-romantic. Not in all cases though.
This is why we study classical languages.
lol
I tell my friends I love them all the time. It does not cause confusion.
Well, just because you have not noticed it causing confusion yet doesn’t mean it hasn’t or that it never will. and even if it hasn’t, that doesn’t mean it doesn’t cause pain.
Especially if you have a friend who is secretly into you.
Lots of things could, theoretically, cause confusion or harm. Many of those things don’t even do the amount of good that sharing love with people can do. That doesn’t mean they’re “horrible” things that should be avoided.
You sound like you may have some baggage around this issue. That’s understandable, but the idea that “love” has to be exclusive to romantic relationships is, frankly, silly. I mean, what if you press into it? Can a parent love their kid? Can a kid love their parent? Is that different than the love that could be between a married couple? Why can’t there be love for friends, as well?
I love my friends. My friends love me. There are feelings of fondness that “like” may not convey.
I agree with the above, and would add that even within the specific context of romance we use ‘love’ to describe a broad variety of things. The romantic feelings that are nurtured between long-term partners and the unrequited romantic attraction that can exist between close friends are really not the same thing.
I love my brother. I do not want to start a romantic relationship with my brother. Neither he nor I has ever been confused by each other’s meaning. There is more than one type of love that is not the same as like.
It isn’t our job to manage the possibility of unspoken feelings. If I have a friend who I say “I love you” to and this causes them pain, I expect them to speak up about it. I’m not okay with being expected to be psychic.
That said, I say “I love you” to my friends all the time. I do love them, very much. They’re my family, the people I choose, and the people who I feel the most affection for. I have never had a situation where a friend confused themselves for a romantic partner of mine as a result of me saying I loved them.
I’m still hard at work bucketing water out of that seemingly already sunken ship. :´(
We don’t want no scrbs
Surprised walky watches what is – I reluctantly admit – a fairly old sitcom at this point instead of just more cartoons.
I guess it’s probably on netflix or whatever.
He’s in telecommunications and he’s fairly trope-savvy.
He probably just binges TV Tropes.
It’s a very binge-able website.
Few can peruse TV Tropes and not binge.
Please take my non-existent upvote.
No Dorothy you didn’t love Walky when you said it and Lucy doesn’t love Walky now
I also dislike Walky quite a bit but he has my sympathy in this situation
Oh, and that’s for you to decide for others, is it?
Is making an observation the same as deciding?
Now of course, since Dorothy isn’t real, her feelings don’t exist and can’t be hurt. The stakes couldn’t be lower. I just think it’s silly to go around saying who is or isn’t in love with someone else, when they’ve stated otherwise.
If you said “I like purple” and I said “No you don’t like purple” would I be making an observation?
And while we’re at it, you’re both thinking about two vastly different shades of purple.
I don’t mean to put words in shrub’s mouth, but I think the intent was more like answering “I like that purple colour” with “It’s really much closer to blue.” It’s not that Lucy’s feelings are invalid, just that the words she’s using to describe them are imprecise.
According to who? If that is what Lucy considers to be love, and she says she loves someone, it really isn’t for external sources to decide that isn’t what’s going on.
It’s infantilizing and a little odd to consider yourself more of an expert on someone’s emotions than they themselves are.
How does Dorothy not love Walky? I know emotions are by nature variable between individuals but she felt emotions for him she defined as love. How is that not valid? I think she loves him even now cause he was the first guy to actually fully believe in her dream to one day be president.
While I do not agree with shrub, I think they are suggesting that neither Dorothy nor Lucy took the time to be sure of their feelings. IE, that you can’t know if you only love someone after a week of dating.
I think Dorothy kind of did. She at least seemed much more aware of her feelings and why they were there than we’ve seen from Lucy – whose take hasn’t really changed from before they were even dating.
She also said it with intention, on her own initiative, rather than dropping it in response to misunderstood comment from him.
grand, majestic, deep, life-long romance isn’t the only kind of love
have been reading the archive and this seemed relevant:
Dotty: No matter what happens, it’s possible I’ll always love you
Walky: So, the lying’s begun already
Dotty: Ha ha. No, I mean “love” can mean a lot of things. I love a lot of people
https://www.dumbingofage.com/2015/comic/book-5/02-threes-a-crowd/exclusivity/
I’m really not sure why you think that?
Not sure why you say that about Dorothy, but I kind of agree about Lucy. Seems to me that she’s more mistaking infatuation or a crush for love. Dorothy’s felt more real. We saw it grow over time and she even talked about why she felt that way. Lucy seems to have been looking for an excuse to drop the word and it’s not really clear why or if her feelings have changed since she first started crushing on him.
Lucy could be like me and obeys the Commandment “Love thy neighbor as thyself.” I love everybody that has not demonstrated to be unworthy of my love.
I don’t love her but I COULD love her.
Oof. Lucy’s gonna be absolutely crushed, isn’t she.
Crushed by the overwhelming tragedy of a teenaged boy not being quite as into her as she is to him.
Many such cases.
Doesn’t mean people aren’t hurt.
Well, yes. The scars can last a lifetime.
Hoping Dorothy follows up with its fine for him to not know yet. They only just started dating.
It is perfectly fine, but how to have that conversation with Lucy, when she thinks he’s already declared his love for her? And how to do it without breaking up?
Do we tell the truth? Do we live a lie?
Is the feeling good? Is that what makes you cry?
When you say those words–Look me in the eye
Tell me why…
Anyone got the link to the previous argument that Walky is referring to? I couldn’t find it.
Here’s the incident in question, I don’t have the energy to search any more for follow up conversations lol
https://www.dumbingofage.com/2014/comic/book-5/01-when-somebody-loved-me/thirdactclimax/
Thank you! 😀
Holy cow! Willis’s drawing style has shifted so much over the past . . . *checks date* . . . —holy cow!—nine years!!
What I find interesting is how he reacted back then when talking to someone for advice and being asked the exact same question “Do you love her?”. Really shows how different his feelings for Dorothy then were compared to for Lucy now.
https://www.dumbingofage.com/2014/comic/book-5/01-when-somebody-loved-me/fart-joke/
Don’t miss this a few (dozen?) strips later.
…and the next few.
Thank you, both of you!
Dude’s like 18, isn’t he? 19, tops?
I don’t blame him for being kind of confused. Love isn’t always cut and dry, especially to someone who doesn’t know if he’s been in love yet.
I’ve been in love 4-5 times. It got easier to tell with time, but as evidenced by the “4-5”, it didn’t get foolproof.
Love isn’t as confusing as the poets and pundits make it out to be.
That’s not saying much though.
Get axiom of explosion’d, LOVE.
Walky loved Dorothy. But yeah, it’s not always easy to tell or say for your first time.
The emotions are complicated but I don’t think that’s really what the issue is here. The more accurate question isn’t if he loves her but if he’s anywhere near the level of affection or investment Lucy has shown to him. The answer to that is very simple. It’s no and Walky knows it’s no. He may still need to sort out what he feels for Lucy, but he is not there and he should be able to answer that. It’s only been a few weeks. He doesn’t need to know what love is or if he feels it to just be honest with Lucy.
I do agree to an extent, they are definitely not on the same page.
I remain unconvinced he is indifferent to her or something like some paint it, but Lucy is definitely approaching this from a point of inexperience and coming on strong, Walky’s lightly experienced between Dorothy and Amber, and Dorothy is the one here who has been around the block with committed relationships.
I do hope he can sort his head out and figure out what he wants here.
yeah he’s definitely not indifferent but he wasn’t exactly active in pursuing her or even, like, all that interested before she was explicitly stated to be an option
I know dudes are oblivious (it’s me. I’m dudes) but if someone was hanging out with me all the time like that I would at least ask someone else if they thought this person was into me
admittedly I would then chicken out of doing anything but that’s a separate tragedy
I don’t think he’s indifferent either, just not on the same wavelength with Lucy. The problem is that he needs to recognize that or they can’t address it. Worst case scenario is he strings Lucy on while he figures his emotions out and depending on the outcome this gets worse.
I don’t feel like Dorothy is being fair to Walky at all here, because it’s really not as simple as “Do you love Lucy?”.
1) Walky and Lucy just started dating. So, he might only like her, which is fine. You don’t have to instantly fall in love with every person you date.
2) Walky might actually love Lucy but is not yet ready to say this out loud. This is fine. It is very different to admit that you love someone to yourself, to that person, or to another uninvolved person. It involves different levels of vulnerability and trust.
3)Walky might not even be sure of how he feels yet. In which case, he can’t honestly answer this question with a “yes” or a “no”.
Walky isn’t super mature, but he was mature enough to recognize he isn’t comfortable with Lucy straight up saying she loves him. And he came to someone he trusted for advice. He is also telling Dorothy, in his own weird, kinda immature Walky way that he needs help navigating this complicated situation, and Dorothy is being really reductive by just boiling it down to simply “Do you love her? Yes or no?” situation when it really isn’t all that simple.
Yeah there’s absolutely no reason to be slapping him with that “Back you into the corner and demand a binary yes/no answer” stuff. Cuz like, what if he says no? Is she gonna shame him for immediately falling in Disney movie love with Lucy the second he was shoved at her?
I don’t disagree, but in the interest of fairness to Dorothy I’ll point one thing out: she didn’t *actually* demand a yes or no. She didn’t say, “Do you love her or not?” As currently phrased, the question is open-ended enough for “I don’t know” to be perfectly valid.
I think it’s the repetition that makes it feel demanding, to me. Repeating the entire question, verbatim, especially when it’s so short and loaded, makes it feel like the asker won’t accept any response other than a binary “Yes” or “No”, and answering “No” will lead the asker to badger the target until they say “Yes” anyway.
At least, that’s how it’s always gone for me with this sort of question, so that may be some personal sensitivity bleeding through.
oh there’s definitely an implicit pressure there, for sure, even if she didn’t actually say it. it’s the fact that it is, technically, only implied that pushes me into the “well, let’s see where she’s going with this” camp.
On the other hand, Walky’s dodging the question with his first answer and Dorothy knows him well. I don’t think she’s pushing for a binary answer, she’s pushing to get him to address it.
And he came to her about it, so he’s going to have to deal with a bit of emotional vulnerability.
This
I agree with this comment but i play devil advocate. Maybe i give Dotothy too many benefits of the doubt but maybe (again) she went good path but on wrong foot and she is trying go with therapeutic “my Answer dont matter what answer is in you?” Or Dorothy is tired with Walky lazy BS (in her opinion) and go hard on him so he cant slim away from this.
We don’t know what the actual advice would be if he says no. Surely that information is relevant to what Walky should do next?
What are the chances a modern eighteen year old can name drop Elliot Reid in casual conversation? Like, am I to believe that Walky went out of his way to stream Scrubs when there are cartoons to watch?
It’s not important. I just don’t think my 23 year old brother ever really watched Scrubs.
Plenty of people around Walky’s age have seen Scrubs. It’s on Hulu and comes highly recommended all over the internet.
It’s the “dropping it into casual conversation” part that raises eyebrows. In this case, we know that Walky and Dorothy spent a lot of time together, so we can headcanon that they watched or discussed Scrubs at some point and therefore he knows she’ll get the reference, rather than giving him the bewildered look that I would. (Everything I know about Scrubs I have learned from DoA alt-texts and occasional mentions in Shortpacked!, I think. Mainly that Willis thinks it’s the only show to do montages while a song plays.) It’s like Professor Brock pre-emptively outlawing Back to the Future references. Sure, a fair number of 18-year-olds have probably seen those by now ancient films, and we can headcanon that the professor endured enough references in the last 30-some years to have got pissed off at them and never noticed when they stopped being made, but I still have my doubts as to how many kids in that class would actually have seen the film and remembered it enough to automatically make the link, or care enough to have commented on it if they had, as opposed to back in the late 80s when it was inescapable.
Yes, the films are available, but there’s a hell of a lot else available too, so it’s perfectly possible not to see them, even if most people will know the title and a couple of things about it that are constantly referenced (flying skateboards, icky incestuous stuff, let’s make sure that rock’n’roll is due to a white person) without necessarily having seen them.
Thanks to headcanon, it’s not a big deal, but it does point to the wisdom of having invented Dexter and Monkey Master as a show, since that allows for pop culture references that don’t risk showing the author’s age.
As someone who still has cable (and is watching it still deteriorate daily in its programming), the BTTF trilogy, as well as all the Star Wars and Indiana Jones movies, seem to do a regular rotation on many channels that need cheap programming. If Walky’s parents kept their cable subscription I’m pretty sure he’d have seen many of these old programs.
I dunno what to tell ya – I see Scrubs and BTTF referenced online constantly. These may. be old, but they’re hardly obscure. When they’re available on streaming services, they’re often pretty far up in their categories. They play on regular tv channels all the time (whether that’s cable or satellite). Sure, it’s possible to not have seen it, but it’s super possible to see it and reference it, especially when it’s super popular and references/memes are everywhere.
Back To The Future is super great!
– flying skateboards, yes. And people know the flying DeLorean.
– icky incestuous stuff: definitely shown as an icky bad idea, and an inkling that they’re related is a total dealbreaker for all concerned.
– White rock n roll could be a problem! If it helps, Marty didn’t write Johnny Be Good, he learned that song in the 80s, presumably from a Chuck Barry record. So Marty didn’t invent rock n roll, he just accidentally brought Chuck Barry’s own song to him, from after Chuck Barry created it. Chuck Barry still did all the work, Marty was just a messenger.
Anyway everything else you said stands, I just love me some Back to the Future ♡
Age doesn’t mean anything. The only thing that matters with entertainment is availability.
Internet is everywhere these days but walky is also sorta a self insert of the author too? So it also would have a lot of what the author is into as well
according to some podcasts and interviews, apparently there are kids as young as ten watching the office. some eps might be ok but the more sexual/scandalous ones might be a bit much for someone at that age range versus 14+ lol
I think it’s less weird for Walky to have watched scrubs and MORE weird for him to reference scrubs. Like don’t get me wrong, Dorothy teed him up for it with the sitcom joke, but I tend to avoid making jokes/references to shows people might not know. Just feels weird that he so confidently said “oh she’d get this joke I’m making”. Maybe they watched it together though.
It’s kind of Walky’s “thing” that he’s watched a lot of media and casually drops references as though everyone else will understand them.
A contemporary 18 year old, who knows, but arguably Walky was 17 years old in our 2009…
well there was apparently a recent tmobile ad with turk and jd’s actor so some ppl in the media would think they’re still relevant at least
Or even, he could’ve just simply seen a viral vid/just that particular scene/compilation or tiktoks of sitcom ‘i love yous’ and ppl being awkward about those
Walky, you came to Dorothy because you knew you needed this.
No, he came to her because she said the same thing to him and he has the foolish hope that she can explain what she meant so he can understand what Lucy means.
You are NOT J.D., and laugh tracks WON’T flatter you (especially after six seasons and a movie)
Now sort yourself out before someone sings A Little Respect
Welp, regardless of his answer, this’ll eventually be an awkward chat with Lucy. I look forward to it.
No, I don’t know why you’re not fair
I give you my love, but you don’t care
So what is right and what is wrong?
Gimme a sign
What is love?
Oh baby, don’t hurt me
Don’t hurt me
No more
I feel like this is a Thing for Dorothy, though I’m not sure why. I feel like likes to boil things down to a simple yes/no question, which is sometimes super helpful but in situations like this that are more nuanced it’s actually the opposite of helpful.
I think in this instance she’s just super uncomfortable since SHE might not be 100% over Walky, and she just told that she, the actual ex-girlfriend, is less jealousy-inducing than Walky’s sister from another mister. Gotta sting the ego a bit, especially after Joyce ignoring her for Joe and Becky calling her bland.
Is she trying to boil things down to a simple yes/no question?
It certainly seems to me that knowing where Walky stands on this is going to be helpful in giving advice and he hasn’t even given a nuanced complex answer yet.
Especially since this Yes-Or-No-Question strikes at the heart of Walky’s real issue here.
In a sense, it doesn’t really matter what his answer to the question is, because its his unwillingness to answer it that’s the problem that he needs to get past. What Walky needs to do is talk to Lucy and let her know what’s going on here, regardless of what his feelings for her actually are. But he’s not going to be able to do that with a metric ton of baggage weighing him down.
Even more helpful for Walky to know where Walky stands. What I’m getting from Dorothy is “you need to know the answer to that before you decide what to do.”
I think this is a definitions problem. Walky’s answer to whether he loves Lucy will depend on which TYPE of love he’s being asked about.
Philia? Yes.
Storge? No.
Agape? No, by definition.
Eros? …. I don’t think we know yet.
… or, you know, he might have zero self-awareness when it comes to feels.
You Eskimos and your words for snow.
That’s a myth.
And also uses a slur.
A terrifying example of the sliding timescale of comics is that it’s mildly implausible that Walky would know who Elliot Reid is
I guess it’s possible he watches a lot of streaming apps?
Oh, come on. Everybody knows that Scrubs is a movie about Sanitation Engineers cleaning up.
Wasn’t that the one with Emilo Estevez? 😉
I guess the real question is what would you consider love?
I want to know what Love is.
I’ve heard that Love is all you need.
I’ve also heard that Love is a battlefield.
What is love? Baby don’t hurt me. Don’t hurt me. No more.
I was just listening to the song and then read your comment. Best comedic timing, I was laughing so hard my lungs were about to turn inside out.
Love is something made up by poets who think it ought to exist.
No, you’re just aromantic. 🙂
It is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.
https://ckjcwf.ytmnd.com/ ?
Some say love, it is a river that drowns the tender reed.
Some say love, it is a razor, that leaves your soul to bleed.
Some say love, it is a hunger, an endless aching need.
I say love, it is a flower, and you its only seed.
Because you refuse to behave like an adult?
Define “behave like an adult”? Like what does that mean, in this situation?
He should be doing taxes.
I generally assume anyone over the age of 18 is pretty much always doing taxes, even when it doesn’t look like they are. Anyone caught not doing taxes will have their age revoked.
Man, it must be difficult for those people who live in countries where their governments do their taxes. They must just have to pretend to do their taxes to keep their age.
There’s a little bit of leeway in Europe, mostly in the northern half. You don’t have to do as many taxes there, but you are strongly encouraged to make theory videos about The Legend of Zelda as a way of supplementing your age.
I’m pretty sure those countries generally pay a lot more in taxes than those in Indiana.
Yeah, but do those taxes tend to go somewhere other than the military, sports, and some rich man’s pocket? I’d totally pay more taxes if they went anywhere fucking useful.
Not that I’m ever not doing taxes. I’m a big grown-up adult who does mature things like that, and also uhhhh mortgage. Lots and lots of mortgage.
Almost like they are still leaving their teens behind them or something. Besides that, you are going to tell me that no “adults” have issues like this in their lives.
I don’t know what fantasy you live in but hopefully you’ll outgrow it.
“Adult” is when you have perfect emotional clarity and immaculate communication at all times, right? /s
An adult would never be in a relationship without already being in love?
An adult would never casually say they loved something about their girlfriend, not expecting that to be taken as a declaration of love?
Really not sure what Walky’s supposed to have done wrong here.
I’m really liking how Walky looks in this strip.
It’s probably just the closer perspective, but I’m digging it.
The arguments the same. Only the words and situations are different.
Not exactly coming up with an immediate “yes” there, Walky…
There’s nothing like reducing complicated situations down to supposedly simple questions.
Me personally, I’d replace “Do you love her?” with “How do you feel about her?”
One question feels loaded, the other is an open invitation to spill those feels. Maybe find the answer in the feels spaghetti.
That’s probably a better question, though I suspect Dorothy would dig into the complexities anyway, if Walky ever answers.
I think its useful here, though, because Walky’s resistance to address the L word is a big part of the problem he’s dealing with. Asking him a softer version of that question would get more of a response out of him, sure, but it’d also give him room to weasel away from addressing the core issue, which is what Dorothy’s insistence on this question is exposing.
‘Spose you’re right about that. I think it’s more of how much weight the word “love” usually carries. It’s probably like a couple of other commenters have said; he doesn’t know how he feels and whether or not that is love and it’s causing him emotional stress that kicks in his coping mechanism of “let’s not talk about it”.
I’m a big Dorothy fan, but it’s not that simple. Sometimes you don’t know if you love somebody or not. and that’s ok!
Therefore, one does not just say “I love you” after dating for just three days (or whatever, idr how many days of in-comic it’s been.)
I could see her asking different questions depending on if the response is, Yes, No, or I don’t know. But also given their previous history… the whole conversation is fraught.
How do you know what you are feeling is the same as what another person is feeling or talking about? Is it love, or is it a crush? Or something else, maybe something sinister? It would be really nice to have some metrics.
Fortunately, we can turn to a wise tiger to enlighten us.
https://www.gocomics.com/calvinandhobbes/1986/02/16
It hasn’t even been a full set week yet this time for him.
Or has it I don’t know, for us a year in a half for them a few days.
“The answer’s simple” – Every wrong person ever.
Well while we’re all here, Dorothy, why don’t you explain to Walky your real reasoning behind suggesting he date Lucy.
The fun part of the sliding timescale is that as of right now, Scrubs ended when Walky was like 5 or 6 when season 9 ended the same year DoA started.
With streaming media plenty of people watch older shows these days. You don’t have to be watching it live.
A theory: Walky’s mom, seeing he was deeply unserious (and/or enjoyed comedies and had no interests in watching dramas) and wanting him to be a doctor, is the one who got him to watch Scrubs growing up.
(The evidence for hee wanting him to be a doctor, in case anyone is forgetting: https://www.dumbingofage.com/2013/comic/book-3/04-just-hangin-out-with-my-family/footforward/ )
(Also evidence for her thinking she can control him, but I think we all know that.)
Linda’s the fucking worst.
*sigh* Walky, let me give you some advice that I’ve learned in my three decades of dating and relationships. if you have to THINK about whether or not you love someone, then the answer is a clear, resounding NO.
And then what? If you’re not sure you love them a week into the relationship?
Especially this early on, no might well not be never.
I should probably elaborate. Lucy, imo, popped the phrase too early. You’re correct in that very few people would definitely decide that they are in love within the first week of a relationship. That said, the fact that Walky’s instant reaction is “uh oh” is also very telling. It means that his feelings do not match Lucy’s, and in my experience that is usually a big warning sign for any relationship, budding or not. If even the initial attraction/infatuation stage is not enough for you to see yourself in a potential future with this person (assuming, of course, that this relationship is not something both partners have decided will be short-term or for fun only), then in my experience odds are fairly low that your opinion will improve. More than likely one partner is not really “feeling it”, but is reluctant to shoot the other down because they’re afraid of being alone or afraid of hurting the other’s feelings (you CAN deeply care for someone but not love them; I’ve actually seen my share of couples where one partner actually didn’t quite love the other, but they stuck with them because they felt they couldn’t do any better or that they’d never find someone more suitable.)
It’s been five seconds, let the guy finish inhaling.
Not everyone experiences and engages with their emotions in the same way. Sometimes people do have to think about it.
Now, do I think Wallky is in love with Lucy? No. But do I think this is good, universal advice? Also no.
That sounds like a you thing.
Definitely the wrong person to be having this conversation with for so many reasons.
Honestly, he’s right. But also Dorothy does have the correct answer.
honestly Dorothy is just too shortsighted here
Walky just needs to be reassured and calmed down
then again this is the girl who broke up with Walky just cause of grades, so maybe not the best person to ask this. But there is really very few people who Walky could rely on this. Hilariously, Jennifer would be the best one
Reassured and calmed down, but also given some advice on how to discuss this with Lucy without it seeming like a rejection and thus a breakup.
So it’s a “no”, then
This should end with them kissing. There haven’t been enough melodramatic romantic bombshells recently and it would be a great peak to dorothy’s “reckoning with her flaws” era
ooohhh….. i want this now too but i just wish it didn’t involve eventually breaking poor lucy’s heart ToT
Something I’ve learned in my time is that different people have different expectations and ideas when it comes to dating. Some people view dating as basically a courting period, and will date multiple people to see which one sticks. It’s not necessarily girlfriend/boyfriend/SO, it’s just “let’s hang out and see if there’s chemistry”. Other people do view dating to be synonymous with being SO. I definitely view dating as being a SO and was blown away when my SO at the time told me that they viewed dating as that first category (keeping in mind that since in their view, we weren’t ‘just’ dating, we were obviously exclusive so there wasn’t another person involved.) I think Lucy views them dating like I do, exclusive, boyfriend/girlfriend, the works, while Walky seemed to be expecting it to be more “we chill, we hang, we get to know each other” hence why pulling out the ‘I love you’ so soon is giving him cold feet.
Also, another lesson I learned is only date people if you’re really interested in them. I once dated a guy because I felt bad for him, and I came to regret it. I think Walky mainly started dating Lucy because… well, because she was interested in him. It’s not a bad reason to start dating, but it’s clear their projectories and expectations are very different.
Even with an exclusive boy/girl friend approach to dating, a declaration of love a week in, before the third date is moving very fast and is likely to throw someone.
Even Lucy seemed to recognize this, because she didn’t say it out of the blue, but only after he said something that she misinterpreted as him saying it first.
She’s definitely more infatuated than he is, but that’s not necessarily fatal to a relationship. Forcing the issue like this, even unintentionally, might be.
I’ll admit that, for me? If I’m interested enough to be exclusive and dating someone, I probably would tell them I love them within a week or two. However, I would also need to know the person and be good friends with them for a long time before getting to that point.
THIS. Nothing to do with the comic – I’m just thrilled to hear someone bring up that dating =/= exclusivity.
Going out on a date or three does not a relationship make. Exclusivity is something that needs to be discussed and consented upon.
It should be discussed, but it’s also usually pretty what someone’s expectations are. And in college relationships especially where you often spend a ton of time together without formal dates, number of dates is a bad metric to use. I remember one such relationship where we jokingly realized we’d just had our first “date” about a year into the relationship.
Like, I think Ruth and Jennifer went on one date, but that was definitely a relationship.
lol this DOES feel a little unfair to walky. i mean. HOW long have they been dating ?
About a week.
OH MY GOD
Haven’t they only been dating for about two weeks? That’s way too early to be dropping the L-bomb. I would also freak out if I was Walky. Loved scrubs btw. One of my favorite sitcoms.
She thinks he said it first. And they were friends for a long period in which Lucy was already crushing on him. So from her perspective things have been going on for a long time.
Was it a long period? Didn’t they meet near the end of the last semester? I’m guessing it’s probably around February in their time now so they only knew each other for maybe three months at max(not counting the winter break). That wouldn’t be that long.
Counterpoint, College time feels super compressed, like years are happening in weeks. Especially in the first semester or two before you get used to it. It’s often the first time living away from home and with these people so you’re seeing friends all day in different circumstances, rather just within contained moments like school or sports. So a few months does feel like a huge amount of time.
At least that’s how I remember it and I’ve known others who felt the same way.
More like one week.
Like Alex says, she’d had a long time crushing to build up her emotional attachment.
You can drop the L-word non-romantically on someone you’ve known for years and they can also freak out on you.
Maybe Dorothy wasn’t the right person to go to for this, but given how annoyed Sal got at Walky and Amber dancing around each other, I can see why he might not consider her an option. Amber? She’d probably give good advice if Walky could get a serious answer out of her–which is a big if. (Plus, they didn’t really end on good terms.) Joyce? No, just no. Becky? Not really on Walky’s radar. (Besides, I’m not sure this is in Becky’s wheelhouse anyway since she and Dina are all butterflies and rainbows.) Dina? Again, not really someone Walky would consider a close friend.
Sorry Walky, but I think talking with Dorothy is really your only option.
whyyyyyy are there ppl saying he shouldn’t break up with her over this??? “it may turn into love” I mean yeah if you force yourself to be around someone long enough chances are you might gain some deep affection for them but uhhhh staying with someone who’s intense feelings don’t match your own is a bad idea. this is college dating not an arranged marriage, Walky shouldn’t make it work w Lucy just to avoid making her feel bad. I feel like folks suggesting he stay with her don’t understand that they’re advocating for Walky to just like gaslight himself.
like how do y’all not see that “you should stay with someone you don’t share feelings for to see if it works out anyway” is TERRIBLE dating advice
Uh, because that’s not what people are saying? Like you referenced in your first comment, it’s about intensity. If Walky didn’t want to be in a relationship with Lucy, he should absolutely break up with her. But one person having stronger feelings in a relationship than the other, especially at a very early stage? That’s hardly a death blow. This is more a communication issue first; if they manage a conversation about it, and that leads to a breakup, fair enough, but it’s not a foregone conclusion.
I can appreciate where you’re coming from but people shouldn’t stay together if their feelings don’t match, even if it’s just the early stages. What is even bringing them together at that point? Obligation? A fear of hurting feelings? Plenty of relationships end after a few days or a week, that’s just how it shakes out sometimes. You should never ever *try* to *make* your feelings match or simply hope they do eventually. Recipe for disaster.
Human relationships don’t work like the fucking Fusion Dance from Dragonball. You don’t have to make sure your power levels are identical before you even start, that’s absolute nonsense.
You can like someone, and they can like you more. You are still both brought together by your feelings; that doesn’t seem hard to figure out. You shouldn’t try to force your feelings, but you’re also allowed to let them develop.
I think folks in this thread are arguing from very different understandings of “match”.
“Walky shouldn’t make it work w Lucy just to avoid making her feel bad”
Look, just because you’ve never resolved a conflict in your relationship, that doesn’t mean nobody else should ever try.
I’ve resolved plenty of em, and like someone said earlier yes talking about it helps. Just baffled why people think it’s good for Lucy for her to be with someone who doesn’t see her the same way. It’s going to set a bad precedent for any future relationships.
It might not be! But that’s a decision they should make after a conversation, and either way they decide could turn out fine. Obviously they shouldn’t stay together if their apparent feelings continue, but there’s no harm in staying together while Walky evaluates his own feelings… provided they’re both aware that’s what’s happening and are both okay with it. Lucy just needs to be aware that Walky doesn’t feel as strongly about her at this time, and choose for herself whether or not she’s okay with staying in a lopsided relationship for a while to see if things develop.
I don’t think anyone has been saying “The slight affection imbalance is good for Lucy”. Where did you get that idea?
The wrong way to handle it is to pretend this never happened and hope his feelings eventually catch up. The right way is to have an honest talk about it and see if she still wants to continue the relationship knowing that he doesn’t feel the same way yet.
Huh. Forgot all about Jennifer–who Walky ruled out at the start.
Walky: *blinks his eyes slightly longer than usual*
Someone with the patience of an ADHD mayfly: wow I can’t believe he’s keeping his eyes shut to avoid being a grown-up, really says something about society
YOU are part of society.
Be the change you want. Don’t be passive about it.
I mean, I guess? I don’t really know what you’re trying to say.
Ok, hear me out, Walky asks two people for advice at the same time, to get several perspectives, because this isn’t as simple as
Mary WorthDorothy is saying. And the two people: Ken and Arnold.Nah, if Dorothy was Mary Worth, she’d be saying “The answer’s simple – you should love her, so decide you do. I expect an invitation to the wedding, and I expect the wedding to be next week.”
It would be some nice woman who has a chance to date someone awesome (or, just not date someone awful), and Mary Worth would be saying, “No you should date Wilbur instead.”
Does Mary know any men who aren’t Wilbur?
I think she’s successfully paired the rest of them off.
Way to break the fourth wall, Dorothy.
Oh so he does love her but isn’t ready for that level of vulnerability or commitment. Has anyone told him that it’s normal and okay to feel that way? Like a therapist, maybe?
Dorothy wants to knows. But I for help Walky or for her own curiosity?
I think its more than her own curiosity. She is still very much stuck on him, and wants to not be, because it might upend her Big Plan. If he does in fact have feelings for Lucy, that will help Dorothy get over Walky.
I love the implied laugh track pause between Walky’s two balloons in the middle panel, that’s big fun
I wonder how funny it would be to view someone’s life with laugh tracks. I feel like there wouldn’t be many laugh tracks for my life, but who knows?
I’ve long wanted the superpower of hearing the incidental music. 🙂
Laugh track wouldn’t be quite as useful.
How fucking hard is it for girls to grasp “I I DON’T FUCKING KNOW IF THE THING I FEEL IS LOVE OR NOT OR AFFECTION OR ANYTHING ELSE AND THAT ISN’T THE POINT OF THE ISSUE RIGHT NOW”
Not hard at all.
It’s harder when you think you’ve just heard them tell you they loved you. Lucy was happily letting things develop until the sitcom miscommunication happened.
at first i was thinking “wow how does this eighteen year old know about a brief story arc from the 2000s sitcom Scrubs” and then i remembered the sheer amount of television david walkerton has consumed
scrubs probably isn’t as far away as ppl born in like the 60s, but it wasn’t exactly a ‘lost media’/hipsters obscure thing
Ethan/Amber are super into transformers but i don’t really hear talk about the modern cartoons unless you go to that specific part of the internet/more likely to hear ppl talk about the micheal bay versions, or some toy ppl keeping up with collecting the new models
at the very least it’s probably more well known than the fictional Monkey Master he’s obsessed with lol