Further, I would say this fight needs to be between Sal and their mother. Even if Walky knows what Sal would want to say, it is important that she choose to say it and be there for the reaction. She isn’t in a place to have that conversation yet, so she left.
I think what he’s doing is the correct thing, but he could have at least acknowledged the victim blaming bullshit Linda is pulling. Like, take Sal and the fight she’s gotta have out of this and you still have Linda being a ferocious bag of dicks and trying to do a thing that will severely impact someone’s life right after they’ve been through one of the most stressful imaginable clusterfucks. You should have some words about that.
What’s he going to do? Scream in a hospital? I think he did the right thing in a shockingly mature fashion. You can’t go 0-100 and expect people to take you seriously.
I am trying very hard to keep my shinola together because this is exactly the sentiment I should have expressed to my friend who ended up not getting the restraining order because she said ‘fuck’ too many times trying to get her father to stop contacting her.
That’s a normal font he said it in, so I’m assuming that’s a ‘processing-unexpected-statement’ what rather than a ‘didn’t-hear’ what. And he stood there a minute himself processing what he just said and seeing both of them reacting to what he said… And he didn’t walk it back. He didn’t try to pretend he didn’t say it. He let it stand there and then announced his intention to go check on his sister. That’s… A lot.
Better than nothing. Hopefully we get a bit more than a peep out of him by the end of things.
Still, the fact that this required both his sister’s frustration and a threat to someone he was fucking in order to get a peep out of him isn’t… the most encouraging.
Isn’t this the first time he’s actually interacted with his mother since coming to the conclusion that maybe his parents were treating Sal unfairly? He hasn’t exactly had the opportunity to peep *or* shout prior to now.
Charles generally takes a back seat to Linda regarding the kids. He’s the nicer of Sal and Walky’s parents, but he never really steps in when Linda is being unfair to them.
I mean, he is the man he is, and he married her. I gotta think he’s got some internalized issues of his own that he’d probably need to work on to be of any use to his kids…
Nicer, I suppose. But nicer isn’t necessarily better and I don’t really see him as even trying to do better. I’m not convinced that he’s just not standing up to Linda. Mostly we just haven’t seen a lot of anything from him.
The “nicest” thing I think we’ve seen him do was talk to Sal at family day and tell her he liked her hair better the other way.
Unless it was revealed on Patreon, AFAIK we don’t know that? We know Dean McHenry was Linda’s first husband and Charles is her current, but we don’t know anything about what the relationship dynamic was – she could have met Charles after she and McHenry had already divorced, for instance.
I’d be more inclined to believe that myself, given that Linda, Charles, and the Dean all seem to be on amicable terms per this strip (and Walky didn’t even know that they’d been married before they were invited to the VIP box; Linda herself said it was “a very long time ago”); Linda’s a fairly awful person when it comes to handling her children, but I don’t think we need to pile on “And she cheated on her first husband, too!” barring any, well, actual evidence.
‘left her husband for’ also implies that Charles was the reason Linda and McHenry broke up. For all we know Charles could have met Linda years after Linda and McHenry had an amiable break-up.
He’s been harbouring feelings of guilt over how he acted towards Sal for a bit now (Weeks? Months?), as well as realising how his parents have always treated Sal differently. But standing up his mum? Heck yeah! Growth!
At her best Linda is a helicopter parent, at her worst she just completely neglectful in so many ways. But the worst thing of all is that there’s no middle ground between these two extremes when it comes to her…think that sums up the parenting skills we’ve seen from her.
Anyway good start for Walky finally growing a backbone or atleast an ounce of vertebrae.
That sounds like Ross and Blaine territory and Linda’s barely on Carols level. I only say barely because I don’t see her siding with the mob and a crazed religious nut gunman against her own family… then again I’ve been wrong before.
But if there’s one nice thing I can say about Linda is that Carol can take a lesson from her about not siding with the people who’ve hurt your daughter, you know unless it’s some punk kid who goes to Yale.
Who am I kidding, I keep forgetting Linda dropped Sal like a bag of rocks and ghosted her for 3-4 years with little no communication. She’s hurt her Plenty and I’m just making excuses for her.
And stole money from her, with its return dependent on her cutting ties with the person she was saving it for because said person was ‘a hoodlum’ (based on evidence which appears to amount to ‘she’s Latina, her family’s not rich, and a white boy with a grudge attacked and disabled her.’ Because yeah, Linda thought that incident would ‘send them the message it was time to cut losses’ or something to that very victim-blaming effect.)
Add in the ‘oh, he thinks he’s a communications major, he just doesn’t realize he’s going to be a doctor yet’ as evidence she’s got a similar view of (read: does not consider a person capable of making decisions in his own right if they do not match with hers) and controlling tendencies for Walky, and yeah, no, I fucking hate Linda. She’s a slightly different flavor of controlling and abusive than Carol, but she is still financially and emotionally abusive.
Ehhhh… She *did* just say that she wants the mob-affiliated murder-kidnapper to get what he wanted *after* everything he just did, and is clearly blaming one of the kidnapping victims rather than the criminal himself. And then implied she empathizes with said murder-kidnapper and believes he was just “trying to make the best choice” for his daughter. Despite said “choice” actively endangering her own child. Even if you ignore the lifetime of emotional neglect toward Sal, that reaction alone puts her on par with Carol.
He’s definitely an enabler and his most recent comment to Sal was loaded and shitty of him, but look, if Linda or Carol or Blaine started taking real steps to not be absolute monsters, I’d go ‘yeah you’ve fucked your kids’ lives (and often multiple other people) such that they will need DECADES of therapy and don’t expect them to forgive you, but hey! Good on you for realizing you’re terrible and trying to fix things.’
Charles hasn’t QUITE for me gone past the point where I think he can make reasonable enough amends to his children. But he’s gonna have to turn around right the fuck now.
hey, speaking from personal experience here, if you’re committed to a relationship with someone who is only committed to getting what she wants, you can stand up every time without getting your way any time.
Agreed, proud of Walky. Like I said yesterday, he’s genuinely got reason to worry that any dissent will lead to *gestures to every strip with Linda and Sal*, dipping his toe in at all was clearly terrifying.
I think that depends on how much of a pushover he is. Does he just go along with Linda to keep her placated? He certainly doesn’t try to stop her boat-rocking.
At least he acknowledged Sal’s presence back on Freshman Family Weekend.
I honestly think he agrees with at least some of it. Sal certainly recalls him taking part in ‘lecturing her about how she’s a failure’ and he is the one we saw insult her hair to her face. He just also makes sad faces when Sal indicates she doesn’t like them.
Yeah, which won’t amount to anything unless he realizes ‘hey, there is a direct causal relationship between you being Like This to Sal and going along with all this bullshit and Sal not wanting to spend time with you,’ but: at least he occasionally makes sad faces, as opposed to Linda. (‘Sure, I just stole from you to control your behavior, but you’re thirteen so you can’t possibly be angry at me forever, that would imply I was wrong, you will eventually recognize that I of course knew best and Marcie is a bad influence.’ Ugh.) It’s not impossible he gets hit facefirst with the Clue Bat of ‘you have almost certainly permanently estranged yourself from one of your children and are well on your way to it with the second, look at your life, look at your choices,’ but he stood by as Linda gave that ultimatum and doesn’t appear to have had much more contact with Sal in those five years.
Linda’s surprise is hilarious. For years Walky has been her spoiled baby, but now that he is maturing and realizing he isn’t as smart as he thought he was, he points at how obciously stupid she is and that is a big OOC moment in Linda’s eyes. If only Walky would stop being a coward.
It’s great. ‘Wait, David disagrees? David has opinions he developed independently of us? And is willing to say them to our faces? What is this sorcery?’
I think it remains to be seen what those stunned looks mean though. At worst it is merely a response to Walky taking Sal’s side instead of silently being the “good kid” and is shocked that he no longer will abide with her constant neglect of Sal. At best, it means that Linda had never considered Sal’s point of view (which is still a serious kind of shitty) and might think to do so in the future.
Oh, I don’t think they’ll take anything from it. (MAYBE Charles, but nothing has so far.) What’s more important is that Walky’s doing this and Walky’s not backing down, he’s just retreating while showing support for his sister.
For at least one moment, they’re getting a glimpse of how badly they’ve alienated BOTH their children.
What is happening? I really don’t understand why everyone is so impressed with Walky here. He did the bare minimum required to be a decent brother. And frankly it’s a little late
overall by about a dozen or so years.
Personally, I’m impressed with him because he is clearly terrified at the idea of defying his mom in any way, and yet he’s doing it. It might be the first time ever he’s really stood up to her.
Also, when you view this situation from the outside, it’s easy to see how horribly the Walkertons treat their daughter (and their son, in a way, re: pre-med). But he’s grown up within the family, and to a child, parents are God. I think when Sal was sent away, that was really traumatic for him. I guess in his mind it must have been like “Sis was bad, so she disappeared and no one ever heard from her again”. He’s probably come to expect a catastrophe if he ever displeases his mom.
Yep! Golden child in an abuse situation is still in an abuse situation, because Walky sees what happens when Sal disappoints their parents and (understandably, given he was a child) does not want that to happen to himself, and does not understand that the things Sal ‘disappoints’ them with are irrational.
This took a LOT of courage, and a LOT of shedding beliefs he’s had reinforced all his life. Going to check on Sal sends a message in itself. He’s still got a ways to go but so does Joyce.
Maybe I’m not meant to understand this. Because whenever I think of child Walky I remember that strip with Sal getting in trouble for attacking Leland. the whole “Spotlight” thing. It kind of implies that Sal was the only one speaking up about how Leland attacked Marcie, and Walky who witnessed the whole thing didn’t say jack because Leland threatened him. It really just makes me think he was a kid who just never had his sister’s back. Even in a situation where he didn’t have to fear them being disappointed in him.
Also there always seems to be an excuse for him. That really annoys me. But I’ve said my peace now. I guess I’m wrong on this but thanks for clarifying for me and dealing with my rant.
Leland THREATENED him. With physical violence. That Walky knew he could back up because he just attacked another kid. Leland is, from everything we’ve seen, terrifying and Marcie is almost certainly not the only kid he’s ever assaulted. (We know by 13 he’s escalated to taking a rock to her throat, that does NOT happen in a vacuum. The question is just whether or not that attack on Marcie was the first one, or at least the first one on school grounds. Cause if Walky – and Billie, and at least one other bystander – knows that Leland hurts people and comes back already, then they also know that if they say what’s going on, THEY are next.)
I think I’ve said it before, I will definitely say it again: Walky’s threat response is very much freeze and fawn. In no small part because Walky has learned that doing what the people who threaten him say keeps him out of trouble, and not going along with them does not. That’s been a pattern he’s had reinforced since BEFORE that strip. This is the first time he’s broken it because it’s HARD to change your brain responses after years of them working Well Enough. Even if you know it needs to change. Humans aren’t in perfect control of our brains, especially not when (like Walky’s heavily implied to be) you’re only just now realizing the strategies most people use don’t work for you because your brain DOESN’T work the same way most do.
Let’s be clear. Walky is flawed. (All of our cast are to some degree or other.) He probably ranks about on Joe’s level of self-realization, well behind Joyce and well ahead of Billie. But he’s also an eighteen-year-old who’s spent his entire life dealing with LINDA, and learning that keeping his head down works well enough to keep him out of trouble. He’s just now realizing that Sal didn’t do anything to deserve the treatment she received, because he has not seen Sal in five years and has distance from the woman who’s been enforcing her worldview on him this entire time and who we’ve seen respond to criticism and logic with ‘no, you’re wrong.’
I think Walky being goofy and Sal being fairly rough-and-tumble (for lack of a better phrase) are things they come by innately (‘Sal, you can be the bad guy!’ ‘Cool.’) But it’s also a very real question to me what they’d be like if their parental treatment had been reversed. No one develops their sense of self in a vacuum. Especially not at eighteen.
Also like, seriously, the Walkertons are firmly with Amber, Joyce, and Becky in the ‘explicitly abusive parents’ category so I do cut them all some slack for having maladaptive coping mechanisms because you do not develop healthy responses to trouble in a situation like that! It fucks your brain PROFOUNDLY. Hell, I cut most of the cast slack for being teenagers/young adults with bad coping mechanisms because I mean. They’re teens/young adults. Their frontal lobes aren’t developed yet. College is in no small part about figuring out who you are as a person, which often includes ‘well I fucked that up royally, how do I do better next time?’
Also in that Leland scene, Walky is just about as blatant as possible about being threatened without saying something that’ll get him hit. If the teacher didn’t see that, the teacher didn’t want to see it.
Okay first of all….I HATE Walky. I’ve made no attempt at hiding that fact. So you’ll have to excuse me if I don’t give him any credit for this. I understand that I’m biased and maybe that invalidates my opinion. Fair enough.
But also this is nothing like Joyce’s epiphany about intolerant implications of her religious beliefs. Walky knows Sal isn’t “bad” or whatever he believed up till recently. Up until like a month ago in comic time he’s chosen to believe Sal is a bad seed as way to justify protecting himself from his parent’s judgement by defending her. He’s barely breaking even right now.
I mean all of that really falls on his parent’s *probably more his mom but his dad is guilty of complacence* But like don’t throw Walky a parade for this.
I love the “up until a month ago” part. You mean basically since he was exposed to her again and had the chance to see that the opinions he’d formed as a kid and were constantly reinforced by abusive parents weren’t true.
Honestly one of the least realistic things about this comic is how fast (in comic time, not real time) some of these kids are shedding life long prejudices.
I can sympathize because Walky is second only to Billie in least favorite character. He annoys the hell out of me because people like him annoy the hell out of me.
That said, there are valid psychological reasons for the way Walky is. Understanding why Walky is the way he is doesn’t mean you have to like him. I think he is in essence a weak personality and something of a coward. Being the Golden Child hasn’t done him any favors. He understands that his parents’ affection and support are conditional, and thinks his only value is in his intelligence and his “adorableness.” That’s a difficult mental cage to escape from.
So we can give him credit here without liking him.
But yeah, sounding ready to throw him a parade? nope.
First reaction: Yeah, Walky, way to tell her what’s what!
Second reaction: I mean you had trouble with follow through, but still good for a first attempt and practice will make it better. And going to check on Sal’s a good thing.
Third reaction: And hey, he’s still paying attention to what Sal said about her. That’s above-average attention span for a Walky.
Fourth reaction: Of course, it won’t get through to Linda.
Fifth reaction: …. oh crap, what if it DOES get through to her? Is she going to try to bond with Sal? There is NO WAY that’s going to pan out well.
His words and actions were fine, but his courage was clearly wavering and that lost it some of its punch. Maybe “follow through” isn’t the best phrase for that.
Honestly Ruth, Joyce, Dorothy, Sally, with some of these names you can tell these characters were originally written by a good Christian boy in the 90s.
Dorothy wasn’t created until the mid-to-late aughts, I think (It’s Walky! was still running in the early aughts, and Dorothy wasn’t introduced until Joyce and Walky!). Point on the others, though.
I think Walky is doing it just right, here. There’s no way this conversation is going anywhere good. Leaving to prioritize Sal is a better impact.
Moreover, Walky has had TONS of info to show what he’s risking if he stops being their golden boy. He only knows conditional love from his mom (he was deeply afraid that Dorothy wouldn’t love him for not being a natural at math), and he’s seen how it is for the twin who doesn’t have that favor. He’s generally avoidant, too (certainly following his dad’s example). He’s doing the very best he can. Good job, using his wiseassery for Good, and it’s OK to get outta there afterwards.
My parents aren’t narcissists but aren’t great with boundaries, and my mum in particular can be really passive-aggressive. I’m in my mid-30s and a married mother of 3. My husband last volunteered to be the “bad guy” about 5 hours ago now…
Mum wanted us to go visit them overnight tonight, with my sister probably coming over tomorrow. The lockdown rules will change to allow us to stay over *from tomorrow night* with it being illegal for us to be in their house other than while passing through to the garden today/tonight, and indoor gatherings with people from more than 2 households still being no-nos. The biggest kiddo is 5.5 and the middle one is 2.5. For the big one, social distancing is a largely theoretical concept. The middle one has no clue whatsoever. Mum was planning on reinterpreting “maintain a minimum of 1 metre [about 3 feet] if you can’t keep 2 metres apart” as “no kisses” – and when I was trying to talk through my concerns with this (including that she is supposed to be shielding, the big one is back at school with other keyworkers’ children, and the husband is working on wards with covid patients) – she appealed to the toddler, who of course responded “yes please” to “do you want to come and see us and play on the trampoline in our garden?” When I responded with a sarcastic “Oh, we’re letting 2 year olds make these decisions now, are we?” I got a flat, serious “Yes” back (of course: the toddler was agreeing with her…).
Husband spent yesterday evening caring for a dying covid patient then wrapping the body. It looks like 20% off the frontline staff in his trust who work with covid patients test positive including those who are asymptomatic. The big one’s school is being highly cautious (e.g. splitting up classes to bubbles of 6 pupils) and they aren’t likely to take kindly to us *breaking the law* and flouting rules designed to help keep people as safe as possible. Expecting a 5 year old to keep a secret is unrealistic and would be unfair.
To avoid Mum trying to steamroll past me on this (“don’t you want to see us? The children will be so disappointed! I was really looking forward to seeing you. I got everything ready…”) he has messaged them about it instead. Because *of course* we want to see them – but I also don’t want to risk their health unnecessarily. (And my sister thinks she’s had covid already and is therefore probably immune now, and is making decisions based on that, rather than following lockdown properly… I want to see her but I also worry that seeing her involves taking unnecessary risks, and my youngest is 3 months old…)
Standing up to your parents can be really hard, even as an adult, especially when you’re used to them approving of you… Walky has been really rather brave here!!
I mean, it sounds like your mum is a little narcissistic?
I’m so sorry you guys are having to deal with being pressured by close family to be unsafe on top of the devastation of covid-19. Good on you and your husband for standing your ground with them. Caring for the sick and dying, looking after a newborn, a toddler and a kindergartner, worrying about everything…you two have it hard enough.
I hope you and your family (including the ones who should learn to take no for an answer) come out of this healthy and safe.
That’s not narcissism. It’s just toxic and manipulative behaviour (possibly abusive depending on how often it happens, people often use narcissistic when they mean self-centered or selfish or abusive, which is stigmatising for people with NPD).
Self-centered is the main symptom of NPD, along with being unwilling or unable to consider the needs of others. Or to think about others in terms that aren’t about how they reflect on self. I know it’s not the only kind of abuse, but thinking oneself above any criticism, so any that comes is an attack that warrants counter-attack, is abusive.
And that is what NPD peeps do. By definition. If they don’t, they cured. NPD isn’t autism or BPD where it’s something you learn methods to cope with, it’s a lablel for behavior patterns that arise from very selfish priorities.
So it might be narcicism. Dunno the whole story. If she’s being hurtful to the guy who stopped her, that’s a classic narcissistic defense.
Just like how Linda just belittled Sal for not falling in line too.
“NPD isn’t autism or BPD where it’s something you learn methods to cope with”
This is straight up untrue. I know people with NPD who have figured out ways to cope who are incredibly nice and compassionate people. That’s not a cure, that’s getting a handle on your shit so you don’t hurt people.
Behaviors stem from thought processes. And yes, there are methods by which to cope. NPD does not equal abuse. Similarly, abuse does not equal NPD. Someone can have a ton of abusive tendencies, including self-centeredness and an inability to accept criticism, and not have NPD.
Congratulations, Linda, you’ve lost both your kids today. FWIW, I don’t expect any action, positive or negative, from Charles. Just a passive drift at the end of which he’ll wonder why his family collapsed and ask himself what everyone else should have done differently.
This is like when Walky punched the punk turned lawyer. I mean, it wasn’t a KO, but it at least got their attention for a while. Who knows, maybe an epiphany will result. It was, as Sal would say, some “good brotherin'”.
Given how strong a personality Linda has and how she’s dominated Walky’s life (to the point where she’s chosen his college courses so he can get the career she’s sure that is best for him), just talking back to her is probably an act of courage of a level that he’s never imagined that he could made before.
Speaking from personal experince saying something then disengaging from someone like Linda is sometimes only way that works, it’s nice to think staying might result in productive talk but with her attitude not going to make any headway and really just stand there being verbally pummeled cause “what they say goes”
This. The whole thing of folks like Linda is they wear you down. Linda is far more accustomed to getting her way, far more skilled at domineering others, and has far more conflict stamina than she has allowed her golden child to develop.
All that would happen if Walky stayed in the conversation is Linda would gaslight him and guilt trip him until he walked it back and pretended she was right and apologized for having the temerity to question her to get her to stop.
Well, maybe. Amber bumped his files up to a C, and Amazigirl helped him set up a system for actually studying. So he may pass, it’ll “only” be the first time he didn’t get an A without even trying.
For those thinking that maaaaaaaybe Linda will have an epiphany – don’t count on it. Check out her eyebrows in the last panel.
This is what she thinks of it: Her son and daughter just unaccountably said really mean things to her – awful, twisted things – and then, after hurting her feelings they walked off and left her alone. This is ultimately because they’re children, but it’s all right, she’s their mother, the best friend they’ll ever have, and she knows best. This is probably all Sal’s fault anyway.
Reading the comments upstream is interesting. I don’t know if it’s been confirmed, but from where I’m sitting, Walky has one of the clearest cases of undiagnosed ADHD I’ve ever seen in fiction, and his actions in this strip reflect that pretty well. Rejection-sensitive dysphoria is a heck of a thing and it absolutely leads a lot of us to “wimp out” in the interest of avoiding excruciating emotional pain. (For example: fleeing from/avoiding math class to the point of freaking out about it but STILL being unable to force yourself to look at it? RSD response. Possibly some executive dysfunction compounding it, but who knows.) It’s not a GOOD response, I’m not defending it, but I can understand why it happens. It’s hard not to develop that as your go-to reaction to negative feedback when you don’t know it’s a thing and can’t catch yourself.
He bought his parents’ narrative about his sister while growing up, but he’s realized it doesn’t quite fit with the sister he’s coming to know. He noticed the injustice about the care package from home, and after his initial, knee-jerk defensiveness, he realized Sal was right about the way their parents treat her. So, he’s seeing the pattern play itself out here in person for the first time since he recognized its existence, and he is pointing it out instead of validating his mother. Backing away in response to a flat “What?” is understandable – it’s entirely possible that if he stayed, he would cave and walk it back because he doesn’t know how to do anything else. But he is pointing it out.
And then fleeing, because that’s what he does when he senses negative feedback coming, but he isn’t just standing by and watching! That is progress! And it might be more progress than you think, given how he usually responds to this stuff.
tl;dr: I’m pretty sure Walky comes across as a spineless wimp because he doesn’t have the tools to deal with his brain in this new environment, or with his new understanding of his family dynamic. But he’s trying, and I do have to give him props for that.
Isn’t Walky missing most of the physical restlessness aspects of ADHD? That’s what has ‘cleared’ me from the diagnosis a few times despite having a whopper of a RSD problem.
Inattentive-type ADHD doesn’t necessarily have the physical restlessness associated with Hyperactive-type. He could easily be inattentive or combined (as could you, for that matter. Aaah, diagnosing neurodivergences based entirely through doctors’ perceptions that are often biased and based on outdated stereotypes.) Especially since the issues we’ve primarily seen with Walky tend more towards the inattentive wheelhouse. (The studying, for example, though he certainly has impulsivity issues associated more on the hyperactive axis.)
It’s also occurred to me that it’s possible that, comics being a static medium, Willis could say later on that certain characters do more fidgeting than is really drawn or considered gestures to this point. (We already know Dina and Amber’s neurodivergences aren’t retcons as such but weren’t consciously written that way at first, so there’s precedent.) Also some things (say, bouncing legs while sitting) could be going on unseen anyway. So if Walky gets diagnosed (which the story seems like it might be moving towards) it would be easy enough to include that aspect if they wanted to.
I don’t have physical restlessness either, and my impulsivity is only a little higher than baseline, but my ADHD is pretty severe in most other respects. I’m “predominantly inattentive” rather than “predominantly hyperactive,” but all that means is the restlessness is internal, for me. Restless mind vs. restless body. It might be the same for you, as Regalli said.
“For example: fleeing from/avoiding math class to the point of freaking out about it but STILL being unable to force yourself to look at it? RSD response. Possibly some executive dysfunction compounding it, but who knows”
Oh hey this really explains a LOT of my attempts at going to college…
you’re never responsible for making any adult listen to you. if you say the thing that needs to be said and run for the hills you’ve done your duty, 100%
Everyone has an opinion on this one. Nice! Genuinely. My own input is that what Walky said here, and the reaction, triggered me instantly. Even a little comment like that takes a huge amount of courage and sometimes stupidity to utter, and the simple “…what?” made my blood run cold.
You’re only on good terms for as long as you are quiet and act the part. There are no disagreements, there is no conflict. The unspoken rule by which you receive care and love says you can never stray from script.
I think Linda will forgive Walky one such moment if he really backpedals soon (I have had to many, many, many times) but he’s in danger of getting the full Sal treatment whenever she decides he isn’t behaving, and I think some people here have forgotten that.
I’m scared for him right now. Not for any immediate repercussions, but because this is the start of his demise with his parents, and it will get ugly. Maybe I’m more scared for myself.. haha. My story is over, so to relive it here.. I don’t have words.
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omg Walky standing up for sis
…standing up with his tail between his legs BUT STANDING UP
*BIG FEELS*
Unfortunately, Walky is still too chickenshit to do more than utter a little peep and run away.
Baby steps
He’s running away with baby steps? He won’t be going very fast, then.
baby steps have teleportation powers, mind you
I choose to believe that Baby Steps is an iguana.
Baby Steps is a fictional book in the movie “What about Bob” a great movie from the 90s that everyone should see…
It’s the best fictional book I’ve ever fictionally read! It’s a pity that its author never seemed to have read it, but OMG that was *life changing*!
Now if only the real me could read it. Sigh.
You have obviously never tried to catch a hyperactive toddler!
…. actually, saying something then going to check on Sal strikes me as exactly the right approach.
I agree. Going to Sal now says infinitely more than any argument with Linda ever could.
It was the right thing to say, and the right thing to do – he just managed to do it in his usual, wimp-out fashion. Very Walky.
Understandable, though – he is NOT used to standing up to his parents, especially his mother. He needs to work on those backbone muscles.
Personally, I don’t see it as wimpy.
Any fight that he could give now would detract from the message, and would distract from doing what he must. Which is making sure his sister’s OK.
Further, I would say this fight needs to be between Sal and their mother. Even if Walky knows what Sal would want to say, it is important that she choose to say it and be there for the reaction. She isn’t in a place to have that conversation yet, so she left.
I think what he’s doing is the correct thing, but he could have at least acknowledged the victim blaming bullshit Linda is pulling. Like, take Sal and the fight she’s gotta have out of this and you still have Linda being a ferocious bag of dicks and trying to do a thing that will severely impact someone’s life right after they’ve been through one of the most stressful imaginable clusterfucks. You should have some words about that.
Rather than staying so that his mother can brow beat him, gaslight him and crush him back into place while ignoring everything he might say.
What’s he going to do? Scream in a hospital? I think he did the right thing in a shockingly mature fashion. You can’t go 0-100 and expect people to take you seriously.
I am trying very hard to keep my shinola together because this is exactly the sentiment I should have expressed to my friend who ended up not getting the restraining order because she said ‘fuck’ too many times trying to get her father to stop contacting her.
Wilson, what leads you to believe they are in a hospital vs a dorm?
According to yesterday’s strip, they are indeed not in a hospital – they’re like twenty paces from the Read Hall (i.e. their dorm’s) main desk.
I think checking on Sal is a lot more important than getting up in Linda’s face.
I think Walky’s priorities are all right here and now.
That’s a normal font he said it in, so I’m assuming that’s a ‘processing-unexpected-statement’ what rather than a ‘didn’t-hear’ what. And he stood there a minute himself processing what he just said and seeing both of them reacting to what he said… And he didn’t walk it back. He didn’t try to pretend he didn’t say it. He let it stand there and then announced his intention to go check on his sister. That’s… A lot.
When a pig flies, you don’t question the distance!
Oh man, Yokohoma Kaidashi Kiko avatar!
Always nice to meet a fellow fan. 🙂
Geez. Tough crowd.
Better than nothing. Hopefully we get a bit more than a peep out of him by the end of things.
Still, the fact that this required both his sister’s frustration and a threat to someone he was fucking in order to get a peep out of him isn’t… the most encouraging.
Isn’t this the first time he’s actually interacted with his mother since coming to the conclusion that maybe his parents were treating Sal unfairly? He hasn’t exactly had the opportunity to peep *or* shout prior to now.
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahsuffer.
As Walky heads off to be kidnapped again.
Walky, saying what she really needs to hear.
Good on you, Walky!
Oh snap.
Yeah, Walky’s getting sick of your shit too.
Now the question is whether this will be a wakeup call for Linda or if she’ll default to “No, it’s the children who are wrong.”
Or if, heaven forbid, Charles will be useful for once.
Sorry, I don’t understand? He Could be helpful?
Oh, wait! Does Charles Play the Foil against Hank?
Charles generally takes a back seat to Linda regarding the kids. He’s the nicer of Sal and Walky’s parents, but he never really steps in when Linda is being unfair to them.
But maybe he will this time?
(narrator: He will not.)
I mean, he is the man he is, and he married her. I gotta think he’s got some internalized issues of his own that he’d probably need to work on to be of any use to his kids…
Nicer, I suppose. But nicer isn’t necessarily better and I don’t really see him as even trying to do better. I’m not convinced that he’s just not standing up to Linda. Mostly we just haven’t seen a lot of anything from him.
The “nicest” thing I think we’ve seen him do was talk to Sal at family day and tell her he liked her hair better the other way.
https://www.dumbingofage.com/2020/comic/book-10/03-when-it-crumbles/ohrightalmostforgot/
This strip comes to mind.
Sorry, who’s Charles again? /s
The man she left her husband for.
Unless it was revealed on Patreon, AFAIK we don’t know that? We know Dean McHenry was Linda’s first husband and Charles is her current, but we don’t know anything about what the relationship dynamic was – she could have met Charles after she and McHenry had already divorced, for instance.
I’d be more inclined to believe that myself, given that Linda, Charles, and the Dean all seem to be on amicable terms per this strip (and Walky didn’t even know that they’d been married before they were invited to the VIP box; Linda herself said it was “a very long time ago”); Linda’s a fairly awful person when it comes to handling her children, but I don’t think we need to pile on “And she cheated on her first husband, too!” barring any, well, actual evidence.
Didn’t say she cheated on him.
‘left her husband for’ also implies that Charles was the reason Linda and McHenry broke up. For all we know Charles could have met Linda years after Linda and McHenry had an amiable break-up.
This, basically.
My offhand headcanon is that they broke up because McHenry wouldn’t cave in to her controlling ways. So she found someone who would.
Nice headcanon! Mind if I run it through this here replicator?
I’d like a copy to use in my head.
Just check it for alien ore before using…
Oh man, 2013 feels like a century ago. Not because of the pacing of this comic, real life has been that bad.
I admit, I expected Walky to stand up to his mom, but I didn’t see it coming so soon in the storyline. Either way, good on him!
He’s been harbouring feelings of guilt over how he acted towards Sal for a bit now (Weeks? Months?), as well as realising how his parents have always treated Sal differently. But standing up his mum? Heck yeah! Growth!
At her best Linda is a helicopter parent, at her worst she just completely neglectful in so many ways. But the worst thing of all is that there’s no middle ground between these two extremes when it comes to her…think that sums up the parenting skills we’ve seen from her.
Anyway good start for Walky finally growing a backbone or atleast an ounce of vertebrae.
She just sees Sal and Walky as extensions of herself, her toys to do with as she pleases.
And accessories, to make herself look better. That’s why David’s going to be a doctor, he just doesn’t know it yet, don’tcha know.
That sounds like Ross and Blaine territory and Linda’s barely on Carols level. I only say barely because I don’t see her siding with the mob and a crazed religious nut gunman against her own family… then again I’ve been wrong before.
But if there’s one nice thing I can say about Linda is that Carol can take a lesson from her about not siding with the people who’ve hurt your daughter, you know unless it’s some punk kid who goes to Yale.
Who am I kidding, I keep forgetting Linda dropped Sal like a bag of rocks and ghosted her for 3-4 years with little no communication. She’s hurt her Plenty and I’m just making excuses for her.
Five years, I believe.
And stole money from her, with its return dependent on her cutting ties with the person she was saving it for because said person was ‘a hoodlum’ (based on evidence which appears to amount to ‘she’s Latina, her family’s not rich, and a white boy with a grudge attacked and disabled her.’ Because yeah, Linda thought that incident would ‘send them the message it was time to cut losses’ or something to that very victim-blaming effect.)
Add in the ‘oh, he thinks he’s a communications major, he just doesn’t realize he’s going to be a doctor yet’ as evidence she’s got a similar view of (read: does not consider a person capable of making decisions in his own right if they do not match with hers) and controlling tendencies for Walky, and yeah, no, I fucking hate Linda. She’s a slightly different flavor of controlling and abusive than Carol, but she is still financially and emotionally abusive.
Ehhhh… She *did* just say that she wants the mob-affiliated murder-kidnapper to get what he wanted *after* everything he just did, and is clearly blaming one of the kidnapping victims rather than the criminal himself. And then implied she empathizes with said murder-kidnapper and believes he was just “trying to make the best choice” for his daughter. Despite said “choice” actively endangering her own child. Even if you ignore the lifetime of emotional neglect toward Sal, that reaction alone puts her on par with Carol.
Our rhymes are ours, they aren’t bought or paid
And like Gramma’s chicken soup they are homemade…
*the hacked Muzak plays A Song I Don’t Care For as a service to YOU*
I never knew Burma Shave was a musician.
He sassed his mom
Then ran away
She’ll get her payback
Another day
Burma-Shave
Look at Walky trying to grow a backbone!
Also, love that panel 5 face.
For now it’s a notochord
Yes, there was an attempt!
That’s right Linda, that was your son talking back at you.
great move, linda *thumbs up*
OH SNAP. Good job, Walky, way to dip your toe into the mess that is your family. I’m proud of you.
Not sure if it’ll work on Linda, but who knows? Maybe Charles will be salvageable.
I don’t think Charles is salvageable, I think he’s stuck as Linda’s yes man but who knows?
He’s definitely an enabler and his most recent comment to Sal was loaded and shitty of him, but look, if Linda or Carol or Blaine started taking real steps to not be absolute monsters, I’d go ‘yeah you’ve fucked your kids’ lives (and often multiple other people) such that they will need DECADES of therapy and don’t expect them to forgive you, but hey! Good on you for realizing you’re terrible and trying to fix things.’
Charles hasn’t QUITE for me gone past the point where I think he can make reasonable enough amends to his children. But he’s gonna have to turn around right the fuck now.
Hank used to be Carol’s yes man
hey, speaking from personal experience here, if you’re committed to a relationship with someone who is only committed to getting what she wants, you can stand up every time without getting your way any time.
I don’t honestly think so either, but if I had to pick a Walkerton parent…
Let’s hope with Charles.
Agreed, proud of Walky. Like I said yesterday, he’s genuinely got reason to worry that any dissent will lead to *gestures to every strip with Linda and Sal*, dipping his toe in at all was clearly terrifying.
I doubt either of the parents are salvageable but if he stays on this track then his relationship with Sal will grow nicely.
I honestly don’t think so either but if either is gonna come around, my money is on Charles.
I think that depends on how much of a pushover he is. Does he just go along with Linda to keep her placated? He certainly doesn’t try to stop her boat-rocking.
At least he acknowledged Sal’s presence back on Freshman Family Weekend.
I honestly think he agrees with at least some of it. Sal certainly recalls him taking part in ‘lecturing her about how she’s a failure’ and he is the one we saw insult her hair to her face. He just also makes sad faces when Sal indicates she doesn’t like them.
Yeah, which won’t amount to anything unless he realizes ‘hey, there is a direct causal relationship between you being Like This to Sal and going along with all this bullshit and Sal not wanting to spend time with you,’ but: at least he occasionally makes sad faces, as opposed to Linda. (‘Sure, I just stole from you to control your behavior, but you’re thirteen so you can’t possibly be angry at me forever, that would imply I was wrong, you will eventually recognize that I of course knew best and Marcie is a bad influence.’ Ugh.) It’s not impossible he gets hit facefirst with the Clue Bat of ‘you have almost certainly permanently estranged yourself from one of your children and are well on your way to it with the second, look at your life, look at your choices,’ but he stood by as Linda gave that ultimatum and doesn’t appear to have had much more contact with Sal in those five years.
Linda: . . .Huh. . That was weird. Well back to trying to punish the victim!
Good on you Walky. May not have stood your ground but this is. . .**massive** improvement from how you used to be.
Walky has been really impressing me this arc I must say!
Actually I say going to check on sal and establishing he has her back this time is a great idea. Linda gets the message
baby steps, walky
With swayin walky butt
Walky with the balls!
And then Run-away-y with those balls.
Linda’s surprise is hilarious. For years Walky has been her spoiled baby, but now that he is maturing and realizing he isn’t as smart as he thought he was, he points at how obciously stupid she is and that is a big OOC moment in Linda’s eyes. If only Walky would stop being a coward.
Good job, Walky.
I’m proud of you Walky, it would be much easier to just stay out of it but you instead decided to say something.
Also who else loves how surprised Linda and Charles look?
It’s great. ‘Wait, David disagrees? David has opinions he developed independently of us? And is willing to say them to our faces? What is this sorcery?’
I think it remains to be seen what those stunned looks mean though. At worst it is merely a response to Walky taking Sal’s side instead of silently being the “good kid” and is shocked that he no longer will abide with her constant neglect of Sal. At best, it means that Linda had never considered Sal’s point of view (which is still a serious kind of shitty) and might think to do so in the future.
And to think that sometimes I think of myself as optimistic.
Oh, I don’t think they’ll take anything from it. (MAYBE Charles, but nothing has so far.) What’s more important is that Walky’s doing this and Walky’s not backing down, he’s just retreating while showing support for his sister.
For at least one moment, they’re getting a glimpse of how badly they’ve alienated BOTH their children.
Staying out of it can also be really damn hard. There are no easy decisions when the parents are the problem.
“Was that the hint of a spine, David Walkerton?”
His spine dissappears like some SMG4 gag.
This calls for an attaboy. So, attaboy, Walky.
“A gaffe is when a politician tells the truth – some obvious truth he isn’t supposed to say.” -Michael Kinsley
Except now they’ll just say the quiet part out loud, because they’ve created a deep enough divide that it doesn’t matter anymore…
Ugh.
Only Republicans. Democrats still get called on every misstep.
But of course. Bald-faced hypocrisy is a cornerstone of the GOP’s platform.
“We are a perfectly peaceful racist group.”
Good for you, Walky! I would have liked to see you set your mother straight about Amber, but defending your sister is even better.@
Good for you, Walky! I would have liked to see you set your mother straight about Amber, but defending your sister is even better.
I want to purchase a print or a magnet or something of Walky’s face in Panel 5.
I was almost impressed with Walky. But of course he’s still Walky and punked out at the end. So maybe a 5/10 on that which is still a fail.
Well, he’s already dropped the bomb. And to judge from Mom and Dad’s reaction, it was super effective.
What is happening? I really don’t understand why everyone is so impressed with Walky here. He did the bare minimum required to be a decent brother. And frankly it’s a little late
overall by about a dozen or so years.
Sal also ditched. And you’re now blaming toddler Walky?
Personally, I’m impressed with him because he is clearly terrified at the idea of defying his mom in any way, and yet he’s doing it. It might be the first time ever he’s really stood up to her.
Also, when you view this situation from the outside, it’s easy to see how horribly the Walkertons treat their daughter (and their son, in a way, re: pre-med). But he’s grown up within the family, and to a child, parents are God. I think when Sal was sent away, that was really traumatic for him. I guess in his mind it must have been like “Sis was bad, so she disappeared and no one ever heard from her again”. He’s probably come to expect a catastrophe if he ever displeases his mom.
“Probably” you say?
https://www.dumbingofage.com/2017/comic/book-7/03-the-thing-i-was-before/deadline/
Yep! Golden child in an abuse situation is still in an abuse situation, because Walky sees what happens when Sal disappoints their parents and (understandably, given he was a child) does not want that to happen to himself, and does not understand that the things Sal ‘disappoints’ them with are irrational.
This took a LOT of courage, and a LOT of shedding beliefs he’s had reinforced all his life. Going to check on Sal sends a message in itself. He’s still got a ways to go but so does Joyce.
Maybe I’m not meant to understand this. Because whenever I think of child Walky I remember that strip with Sal getting in trouble for attacking Leland. the whole “Spotlight” thing. It kind of implies that Sal was the only one speaking up about how Leland attacked Marcie, and Walky who witnessed the whole thing didn’t say jack because Leland threatened him. It really just makes me think he was a kid who just never had his sister’s back. Even in a situation where he didn’t have to fear them being disappointed in him.
Also there always seems to be an excuse for him. That really annoys me. But I’ve said my peace now. I guess I’m wrong on this but thanks for clarifying for me and dealing with my rant.
Yes. Leland threatened him.
Leland THREATENED him. With physical violence. That Walky knew he could back up because he just attacked another kid. Leland is, from everything we’ve seen, terrifying and Marcie is almost certainly not the only kid he’s ever assaulted. (We know by 13 he’s escalated to taking a rock to her throat, that does NOT happen in a vacuum. The question is just whether or not that attack on Marcie was the first one, or at least the first one on school grounds. Cause if Walky – and Billie, and at least one other bystander – knows that Leland hurts people and comes back already, then they also know that if they say what’s going on, THEY are next.)
I think I’ve said it before, I will definitely say it again: Walky’s threat response is very much freeze and fawn. In no small part because Walky has learned that doing what the people who threaten him say keeps him out of trouble, and not going along with them does not. That’s been a pattern he’s had reinforced since BEFORE that strip. This is the first time he’s broken it because it’s HARD to change your brain responses after years of them working Well Enough. Even if you know it needs to change. Humans aren’t in perfect control of our brains, especially not when (like Walky’s heavily implied to be) you’re only just now realizing the strategies most people use don’t work for you because your brain DOESN’T work the same way most do.
Let’s be clear. Walky is flawed. (All of our cast are to some degree or other.) He probably ranks about on Joe’s level of self-realization, well behind Joyce and well ahead of Billie. But he’s also an eighteen-year-old who’s spent his entire life dealing with LINDA, and learning that keeping his head down works well enough to keep him out of trouble. He’s just now realizing that Sal didn’t do anything to deserve the treatment she received, because he has not seen Sal in five years and has distance from the woman who’s been enforcing her worldview on him this entire time and who we’ve seen respond to criticism and logic with ‘no, you’re wrong.’
I think Walky being goofy and Sal being fairly rough-and-tumble (for lack of a better phrase) are things they come by innately (‘Sal, you can be the bad guy!’ ‘Cool.’) But it’s also a very real question to me what they’d be like if their parental treatment had been reversed. No one develops their sense of self in a vacuum. Especially not at eighteen.
Also like, seriously, the Walkertons are firmly with Amber, Joyce, and Becky in the ‘explicitly abusive parents’ category so I do cut them all some slack for having maladaptive coping mechanisms because you do not develop healthy responses to trouble in a situation like that! It fucks your brain PROFOUNDLY. Hell, I cut most of the cast slack for being teenagers/young adults with bad coping mechanisms because I mean. They’re teens/young adults. Their frontal lobes aren’t developed yet. College is in no small part about figuring out who you are as a person, which often includes ‘well I fucked that up royally, how do I do better next time?’
Also in that Leland scene, Walky is just about as blatant as possible about being threatened without saying something that’ll get him hit. If the teacher didn’t see that, the teacher didn’t want to see it.
This is like Roz blasting Joyce for ‘finally’ realizing the error of her ways.
Okay first of all….I HATE Walky. I’ve made no attempt at hiding that fact. So you’ll have to excuse me if I don’t give him any credit for this. I understand that I’m biased and maybe that invalidates my opinion. Fair enough.
But also this is nothing like Joyce’s epiphany about intolerant implications of her religious beliefs. Walky knows Sal isn’t “bad” or whatever he believed up till recently. Up until like a month ago in comic time he’s chosen to believe Sal is a bad seed as way to justify protecting himself from his parent’s judgement by defending her. He’s barely breaking even right now.
I mean all of that really falls on his parent’s *probably more his mom but his dad is guilty of complacence* But like don’t throw Walky a parade for this.
I love the “up until a month ago” part. You mean basically since he was exposed to her again and had the chance to see that the opinions he’d formed as a kid and were constantly reinforced by abusive parents weren’t true.
Honestly one of the least realistic things about this comic is how fast (in comic time, not real time) some of these kids are shedding life long prejudices.
I can sympathize because Walky is second only to Billie in least favorite character. He annoys the hell out of me because people like him annoy the hell out of me.
That said, there are valid psychological reasons for the way Walky is. Understanding why Walky is the way he is doesn’t mean you have to like him. I think he is in essence a weak personality and something of a coward. Being the Golden Child hasn’t done him any favors. He understands that his parents’ affection and support are conditional, and thinks his only value is in his intelligence and his “adorableness.” That’s a difficult mental cage to escape from.
So we can give him credit here without liking him.
But yeah, sounding ready to throw him a parade? nope.
First reaction: Yeah, Walky, way to tell her what’s what!
Second reaction: I mean you had trouble with follow through, but still good for a first attempt and practice will make it better. And going to check on Sal’s a good thing.
Third reaction: And hey, he’s still paying attention to what Sal said about her. That’s above-average attention span for a Walky.
Fourth reaction: Of course, it won’t get through to Linda.
Fifth reaction: …. oh crap, what if it DOES get through to her? Is she going to try to bond with Sal? There is NO WAY that’s going to pan out well.
I can’t imagine how he could have followed through better than that.
His words and actions were fine, but his courage was clearly wavering and that lost it some of its punch. Maybe “follow through” isn’t the best phrase for that.
So, hands up, who here forgot her name is “Sally”? Because it took me a decent chunk to figure out who Linda was talking about.
Every time I type in Walky on my tablet it gets autocorrected to Sally. So no, it’s not likely I would forget.
Sally Elizabeth Walkerton.
Honestly Ruth, Joyce, Dorothy, Sally, with some of these names you can tell these characters were originally written by a good Christian boy in the 90s.
Dorothy wasn’t created until the mid-to-late aughts, I think (It’s Walky! was still running in the early aughts, and Dorothy wasn’t introduced until Joyce and Walky!). Point on the others, though.
I wonder in if in his near death experience he determined that it would be best to not blindly side with parents and adult figures.
I’d expect everyone in that kidnapping to atleast learn something. This seems like a good enough lesson for Walky.
Tempted to make joke about Gandalf here, but probably shouldn’t.
Yeah I imagine that would put a LOT of stuff in perspective.
I think Walky is doing it just right, here. There’s no way this conversation is going anywhere good. Leaving to prioritize Sal is a better impact.
Moreover, Walky has had TONS of info to show what he’s risking if he stops being their golden boy. He only knows conditional love from his mom (he was deeply afraid that Dorothy wouldn’t love him for not being a natural at math), and he’s seen how it is for the twin who doesn’t have that favor. He’s generally avoidant, too (certainly following his dad’s example). He’s doing the very best he can. Good job, using his wiseassery for Good, and it’s OK to get outta there afterwards.
Ooh, great note about the conditional love. 🙁
Finally, I’m glad he stood up for her here.
Good brother, Walky style!
Walky, after standing up a little too quickly, falls over and cartwheels off stage
Walky’s a good brother. <3
I have to commend Walky on his quick thinking there.
Yes, the excuse to leave and successfully not waiting for an answer. Good tactical moves for self-protection.
Yes I’m so pleased with all his behavior!
Walky speaks the truth. Too bad Linda doesn’t want to hear it.
My parents aren’t narcissists but aren’t great with boundaries, and my mum in particular can be really passive-aggressive. I’m in my mid-30s and a married mother of 3. My husband last volunteered to be the “bad guy” about 5 hours ago now…
Mum wanted us to go visit them overnight tonight, with my sister probably coming over tomorrow. The lockdown rules will change to allow us to stay over *from tomorrow night* with it being illegal for us to be in their house other than while passing through to the garden today/tonight, and indoor gatherings with people from more than 2 households still being no-nos. The biggest kiddo is 5.5 and the middle one is 2.5. For the big one, social distancing is a largely theoretical concept. The middle one has no clue whatsoever. Mum was planning on reinterpreting “maintain a minimum of 1 metre [about 3 feet] if you can’t keep 2 metres apart” as “no kisses” – and when I was trying to talk through my concerns with this (including that she is supposed to be shielding, the big one is back at school with other keyworkers’ children, and the husband is working on wards with covid patients) – she appealed to the toddler, who of course responded “yes please” to “do you want to come and see us and play on the trampoline in our garden?” When I responded with a sarcastic “Oh, we’re letting 2 year olds make these decisions now, are we?” I got a flat, serious “Yes” back (of course: the toddler was agreeing with her…).
Husband spent yesterday evening caring for a dying covid patient then wrapping the body. It looks like 20% off the frontline staff in his trust who work with covid patients test positive including those who are asymptomatic. The big one’s school is being highly cautious (e.g. splitting up classes to bubbles of 6 pupils) and they aren’t likely to take kindly to us *breaking the law* and flouting rules designed to help keep people as safe as possible. Expecting a 5 year old to keep a secret is unrealistic and would be unfair.
To avoid Mum trying to steamroll past me on this (“don’t you want to see us? The children will be so disappointed! I was really looking forward to seeing you. I got everything ready…”) he has messaged them about it instead. Because *of course* we want to see them – but I also don’t want to risk their health unnecessarily. (And my sister thinks she’s had covid already and is therefore probably immune now, and is making decisions based on that, rather than following lockdown properly… I want to see her but I also worry that seeing her involves taking unnecessary risks, and my youngest is 3 months old…)
Standing up to your parents can be really hard, even as an adult, especially when you’re used to them approving of you… Walky has been really rather brave here!!
I mean, it sounds like your mum is a little narcissistic?
I’m so sorry you guys are having to deal with being pressured by close family to be unsafe on top of the devastation of covid-19. Good on you and your husband for standing your ground with them. Caring for the sick and dying, looking after a newborn, a toddler and a kindergartner, worrying about everything…you two have it hard enough.
I hope you and your family (including the ones who should learn to take no for an answer) come out of this healthy and safe.
That’s not narcissism. It’s just toxic and manipulative behaviour (possibly abusive depending on how often it happens, people often use narcissistic when they mean self-centered or selfish or abusive, which is stigmatising for people with NPD).
Self-centered is the main symptom of NPD, along with being unwilling or unable to consider the needs of others. Or to think about others in terms that aren’t about how they reflect on self. I know it’s not the only kind of abuse, but thinking oneself above any criticism, so any that comes is an attack that warrants counter-attack, is abusive.
And that is what NPD peeps do. By definition. If they don’t, they cured. NPD isn’t autism or BPD where it’s something you learn methods to cope with, it’s a lablel for behavior patterns that arise from very selfish priorities.
So it might be narcicism. Dunno the whole story. If she’s being hurtful to the guy who stopped her, that’s a classic narcissistic defense.
Just like how Linda just belittled Sal for not falling in line too.
“NPD isn’t autism or BPD where it’s something you learn methods to cope with”
This is straight up untrue. I know people with NPD who have figured out ways to cope who are incredibly nice and compassionate people. That’s not a cure, that’s getting a handle on your shit so you don’t hurt people.
Behaviors stem from thought processes. And yes, there are methods by which to cope. NPD does not equal abuse. Similarly, abuse does not equal NPD. Someone can have a ton of abusive tendencies, including self-centeredness and an inability to accept criticism, and not have NPD.
Sympathies, but glad your husband has your back here. You’re doing good.
I’m sorry you have to deal with such selfishness. I wish I had something helpful to say. Know that this random Internet dude is wishing you well.
You’re a good man, Walky.
Congratulations, Linda, you’ve lost both your kids today. FWIW, I don’t expect any action, positive or negative, from Charles. Just a passive drift at the end of which he’ll wonder why his family collapsed and ask himself what everyone else should have done differently.
That’s not true!
She’d already lost Sal.
No, she only lost Walky. She threw Sal away years ago.
This is like when Walky punched the punk turned lawyer. I mean, it wasn’t a KO, but it at least got their attention for a while. Who knows, maybe an epiphany will result. It was, as Sal would say, some “good brotherin'”.
THANK YOU Walky.
Seconded
Given how strong a personality Linda has and how she’s dominated Walky’s life (to the point where she’s chosen his college courses so he can get the career she’s sure that is best for him), just talking back to her is probably an act of courage of a level that he’s never imagined that he could made before.
Speaking from personal experince saying something then disengaging from someone like Linda is sometimes only way that works, it’s nice to think staying might result in productive talk but with her attitude not going to make any headway and really just stand there being verbally pummeled cause “what they say goes”
This. The whole thing of folks like Linda is they wear you down. Linda is far more accustomed to getting her way, far more skilled at domineering others, and has far more conflict stamina than she has allowed her golden child to develop.
All that would happen if Walky stayed in the conversation is Linda would gaslight him and guilt trip him until he walked it back and pretended she was right and apologized for having the temerity to question her to get her to stop.
Wait, she picked his classes for him?
You’re supposed to be there to comfort them, you know.
“also, I’m flunking math. Byyyyyeeeeeeeeeeeee”
Well, maybe. Amber bumped his files up to a C, and Amazigirl helped him set up a system for actually studying. So he may pass, it’ll “only” be the first time he didn’t get an A without even trying.
Telling the Truth, Walkerton? Now, was that wise?
WWRtDoTD?
THE RECKONING BEGINS
I like walky
Standing up for his sister. Well done, Walky.
Walky has done good today.
: |
Uh oh, better fear Linda’s revenge. Don’t let Sal’s motorbike unsupervised.
One day Walky and Sal will hug, and i may actually cry a bit when that happens.
They ain’t really a hugging family.
Exactly.
That’s what makes it tear worthy. Sal will probably say oo that’s enough now after a beat panel
I bet Nolans Joker went to this school. And this is how we learnt how he got his scars.
And his weird plans and hiring practices.
Panel five Walky has such an incredible expression.
And he’s being a good twin to his twin here.
Walky has been Tommen his entire life.
Not Joffrey.
But definitely Tommen.
Walky growing a little bit of spine? Why, this 2020 keeps being full of surprises.
Holy shit, a spine!
Finally!!!! I’m so proud of Walky right now ♡. Little steps.
Thanks Walky for sticking up for your sister, specifically against your mom.
His baby spine is growing… Aww
For those thinking that maaaaaaaybe Linda will have an epiphany – don’t count on it. Check out her eyebrows in the last panel.
This is what she thinks of it: Her son and daughter just unaccountably said really mean things to her – awful, twisted things – and then, after hurting her feelings they walked off and left her alone. This is ultimately because they’re children, but it’s all right, she’s their mother, the best friend they’ll ever have, and she knows best. This is probably all Sal’s fault anyway.
Walky can learn!
Fuck yeah Walky!
Reading the comments upstream is interesting. I don’t know if it’s been confirmed, but from where I’m sitting, Walky has one of the clearest cases of undiagnosed ADHD I’ve ever seen in fiction, and his actions in this strip reflect that pretty well. Rejection-sensitive dysphoria is a heck of a thing and it absolutely leads a lot of us to “wimp out” in the interest of avoiding excruciating emotional pain. (For example: fleeing from/avoiding math class to the point of freaking out about it but STILL being unable to force yourself to look at it? RSD response. Possibly some executive dysfunction compounding it, but who knows.) It’s not a GOOD response, I’m not defending it, but I can understand why it happens. It’s hard not to develop that as your go-to reaction to negative feedback when you don’t know it’s a thing and can’t catch yourself.
He bought his parents’ narrative about his sister while growing up, but he’s realized it doesn’t quite fit with the sister he’s coming to know. He noticed the injustice about the care package from home, and after his initial, knee-jerk defensiveness, he realized Sal was right about the way their parents treat her. So, he’s seeing the pattern play itself out here in person for the first time since he recognized its existence, and he is pointing it out instead of validating his mother. Backing away in response to a flat “What?” is understandable – it’s entirely possible that if he stayed, he would cave and walk it back because he doesn’t know how to do anything else. But he is pointing it out.
And then fleeing, because that’s what he does when he senses negative feedback coming, but he isn’t just standing by and watching! That is progress! And it might be more progress than you think, given how he usually responds to this stuff.
tl;dr: I’m pretty sure Walky comes across as a spineless wimp because he doesn’t have the tools to deal with his brain in this new environment, or with his new understanding of his family dynamic. But he’s trying, and I do have to give him props for that.
I actually think this is the most spine Walky has shown so far.
So do I! This was more of an aside in response to some repeated sentiments I saw upthread. I’m very proud of Walky, here.
Isn’t Walky missing most of the physical restlessness aspects of ADHD? That’s what has ‘cleared’ me from the diagnosis a few times despite having a whopper of a RSD problem.
Poor Sal. She was stuck under Shadowweaver and ended up as Catra versus She-Ra.
At least in most people’s eyes.
Inattentive-type ADHD doesn’t necessarily have the physical restlessness associated with Hyperactive-type. He could easily be inattentive or combined (as could you, for that matter. Aaah, diagnosing neurodivergences based entirely through doctors’ perceptions that are often biased and based on outdated stereotypes.) Especially since the issues we’ve primarily seen with Walky tend more towards the inattentive wheelhouse. (The studying, for example, though he certainly has impulsivity issues associated more on the hyperactive axis.)
It’s also occurred to me that it’s possible that, comics being a static medium, Willis could say later on that certain characters do more fidgeting than is really drawn or considered gestures to this point. (We already know Dina and Amber’s neurodivergences aren’t retcons as such but weren’t consciously written that way at first, so there’s precedent.) Also some things (say, bouncing legs while sitting) could be going on unseen anyway. So if Walky gets diagnosed (which the story seems like it might be moving towards) it would be easy enough to include that aspect if they wanted to.
I don’t have physical restlessness either, and my impulsivity is only a little higher than baseline, but my ADHD is pretty severe in most other respects. I’m “predominantly inattentive” rather than “predominantly hyperactive,” but all that means is the restlessness is internal, for me. Restless mind vs. restless body. It might be the same for you, as Regalli said.
I’m pretty sure that Walky is not confirmed as having ADHD or something similar, but he’s very much acting that way.
“For example: fleeing from/avoiding math class to the point of freaking out about it but STILL being unable to force yourself to look at it? RSD response. Possibly some executive dysfunction compounding it, but who knows”
Oh hey this really explains a LOT of my attempts at going to college…
Same :/
Sounds like me with statistics and creative writing last semester…
you’re never responsible for making any adult listen to you. if you say the thing that needs to be said and run for the hills you’ve done your duty, 100%
Nice. This was nice.
Everyone has an opinion on this one. Nice! Genuinely. My own input is that what Walky said here, and the reaction, triggered me instantly. Even a little comment like that takes a huge amount of courage and sometimes stupidity to utter, and the simple “…what?” made my blood run cold.
You’re only on good terms for as long as you are quiet and act the part. There are no disagreements, there is no conflict. The unspoken rule by which you receive care and love says you can never stray from script.
I think Linda will forgive Walky one such moment if he really backpedals soon (I have had to many, many, many times) but he’s in danger of getting the full Sal treatment whenever she decides he isn’t behaving, and I think some people here have forgotten that.
I’m scared for him right now. Not for any immediate repercussions, but because this is the start of his demise with his parents, and it will get ugly. Maybe I’m more scared for myself.. haha. My story is over, so to relive it here.. I don’t have words.
Thanks for another great strip Willis.
Shitty parents too, it seems.
Growing a spine
Walky Panel 5 is my new mood ring colour