Which could be the wake up call for Marcie, as she’d finally couldn’t deny that even the nicest-looking ass is not worth it enough to ignore the stench that comes from an asshole like Malaya.
It’s been a couple of days.
That said, it wasn’t like he turned down women in that time. He just didn’t hit on any women in that time.
The first woman to come on to him, and he jumps at the chance.
Of course, it had the added benefits of dumping Faz sitting duty on someone else and avoiding Joyce’s pointed question.
I’m hoping Joe realizes through all this that it doesn’t take a monogamous relationship to seriously let someone down by folliowing his junk around.
Then again, I do think people crack down on Joelaya too hard.
Aside from the awful Faz situation Joe dumped on Joyce, Malaya’s words are the truth; they’re attracted to each other and consenting adults, badabing badaboom.
Sure. If Faz isn’t watched he’ll go and creep the women’s dorm, someone will call campus security, and he’ll be handed over to child services for safe disposal. I get that.
But why does Faz behave in such a bizarre way? Was he raised in a cupboard without human contact?
Amber was raised by Blaine and got an intense amount of self loathing out of it. While she’s still a social outcast (though less than she thinks she is), her fear of doing wrong caused her to have the motto:
“I don’t make the rules, I just live in fear of them.”
which is why she’s still more well-adjusted than Dina is in many ways, because she’s very sensitive to being perceived as weird.
I’m guessing that Faz coped by swinging the other way and holding on to a weird self-image where he’s a God amongst men and his parents are just ignorant.
Both of them coped by spending way too much time on the internet.
I am really not on board with your definition of not being well adjusted. Dina generally seems happy and is liked by her peers. She is infaltised by them, which bothers her, but people are starting to see her as a young adult more and more.
Like it is upsetting when people see different as being badly adjusted. She’s happy, and as far as we know her academic side is going fine too.
He carried over pretty much entirely unchanged from previous universes which were much less focused on a realistic setting and thus he feels jarringly out of place in a slice-of-life college dramedy where people more or less act like real human beings that could conceivably exist.
“A second pair of eyes” does not directly imply “I’ll do everything while you fuck of and… fuck.”, but I can sure see how Joe choses to read it that way.
She has no real obligation, but she did say she’s help Amber since Amber protected Dorothy, so I expect she’ll feel a perceived obligation to watch Faz
Nah, Joyce needs to pass him on to someone else. I want Faz passed around the whole cast by the end of the day. Either ending with Dina tying him up again or someone casually asking Amber to keep an eye on him.
I think this was a reply to me, so: “assumed responsibility” means a responsibility he took on. If you do a quick Google search for “assumed,” it should come up as the second definition for the word, which will hopefully make it make more sense.
It’s definitely the less commonly used meaning for the word, so I can see how it could be confusing.
Also, to be fair, if I didn’t know Malaya and an IRL version of her came up to me and said that while having the expression in panel 2, I would do the same. Of course, if Malaya said such things to ladies, then Marcie wouldn’t be internally screaming right now. Still… that panel 2 face… damn.
I personally am worried Joe might backslide a bit into jackassery. Not so far as to make an outright ‘List 2.0’ or any of his worst behaviour, but just…more like he was instead of who he’s been trying to be.
Yeah, took me a bit to see that’s likely where this is going. Joe hasn’t faced the actual threat to his new resolve yet.
Malaya’s not just a hot girl who offered him sex – there’s no real problem with that. She actually wants him because of the list, because of Old Joe’s reputation. That’s going to screw him up big time when he finds out.
Which he will, because she’s going to ask about the list.
For me I was rooting less for Joe keeping an eye on Faz and more for Joe sticking with this difficult conversation and sitting with his emotional vulnerability a little. But alas.
It’s that too, but if he’s not ready for the conversation, I can be sympathetic to that. But like, “This person expressed sexual interest in me, so I’m going to go hookup with her”– cool. “This person expressed sexual interest in me, so I’m going to walk away in the middle of a conversation with a friend and leave her responsible for a task I volunteered to take on to help another friend…to hookup with the first person”– less cool.
Ah, yeah, that makes a lot of sense. I was so focused on Joe bailing in the first place that I managed to gloss over that Joe dumping Faz on Joyce makes the whole thing extra uncool.
(And to be clear, I totally think it’s fine to excuse yourself from uncomfortable conversations you aren’t prepared to have — it’s just that this is so not the way to do it.)
Honestly, I’m kinda hoping Joyce punches Faz in the nose. Granted, Faz, being Faz, will probably see it as a sexual thing, but it’ll still be enjoyable to watch.
I suspect it depends how seriously she wanted to date Malaya – if it was closer to ‘I really want to bang her and maybe dating her after that would be nice’ than she might be okay. If it’s closer to ‘I really want to go out with her’ I suspect she’ll be more upset.
Myeh, she didn’t do anything wrong. She propositioned a person and they were down with it.
And I can only feel bad for Marcie to a point. If you don’t state your feelings, you don’t have any right to be mad if someone else doesn’t respect them.
Not knowingly, no, but it’s like offering a recovering alcoholic a drink, or (more relevantly with Jacob’s “Shortpacked!” continuity) a sex addict a new partner.
She didn’t know he was swearing off sex or what have you either. I mean, she’s going for a guy to avoid dealing with her desire to hate fuck Sal, but other than that the worst thing she did was proposition a basic stranger who was well know for taking on all comers.
I mean the fact that she seems to have done it largely to spite Sal is pretty fucked up even if she’s an idiot and in reality Sal couldn’t give less of a damn about this.
> in reality Sal couldn’t give less of a damn about this.
Malaya appears to be incapable of understanding that people have different opinions than her. She’s projecting what she would feel if she was in Sal’s position onto Sal.
This isn’t the first time she’s done something like this, and if she is to have any personal growth in this comic it will be learning that not everyone thinks the way she does.
I’m pretty sure we should all be resigned to everyone falling back into their same shitty habits. Walky and Dorothy already failed so it’s only natural that the conga line continues.
I’m looking at you Billy, Ruth, Amber, Mary, Sarah, etc.
Walky and Dorothy are like the opposite sides of those coins. Walky doesn’t take care of himself because he’s self-indulgent and lazy and Dorothy doesn’t because she’s pushing herself too hard. Walky works far too little and Dorothy far too much.
But that doesn’t seem like something they can be said to have failed to change at this point. Because really, the change they made and then went back on was whether they were together.
He has an obligation to his promise, and an obligation as a friend to NOT put Joyce, of all people, in a horrible situation where she has to deal with the living embodiment of the manosphere.
I hope they haven’t found a cure for whatever he gets from Malaya.
And with this Joe and Malaya have officially pissed off everyone observing both fictional and none fictional.
All I haft to say I feel sorry for Marcie but I sort of saw this coming, also Joe you fucking worthless disappointment, ando Malaya careful what you wish for.
I am honestly not bothered by Malaya in the least, here. She’s being upfront about this being just a casual hook-up, she’s not actively trying to destroy anyone’s relationship, and she’s not breaking any established commitments, violating any school policies or manipulating others to do what she wants.
So, I want everyone else in the strip to realize that they now need to look to Malaya for moral and ethical guidance, and to feel bad about that fact.
Eh, if you don’t communicate how you feel to people this is generally the kind of thing that happens. Plus I don’t have a lot of sympathy for Marcie because she was weird and underhanded about her interest in Malaya.
And if a guy was doing what Marcie’s been doing, I wouldn’t have any sympathy for him, either–it’s literal Nice Guy Syndrome. She gets some pity, but she needs to own her crap.
Woah, Marcie hasn’t done anything Nice Guy – y yet. Hanging out with someone and not being ready to ask them out (especially when said asking out may involve coming out to them) is not quite the same thing as getting pissy and acting like a tool when they’re not interested even though you were ‘so nice’.
I don’t think Malaya was actually aware that Marcie had a crush on her. Remember that page where she talked Marcie about always having been straight with her, i.e. not having any ulterior motives? The same page features Marcie checking out her butt.
So yeah, I kinda fail to see how that’s a dick move, considering Malaya probably doesn’t know what we do.
Well I mean, she’s literally out to “steal Joe” from Sal because she perceives Sal as being interested in Joe for… some reason. I would consider that alone as a dick move.
It won’t. But Malaya thinks it will. She’ll fool around with Joe and get a better rating than Sal and that’ll show Sal up because Sal’s a poser who’s just pretending not to care about it, while Malaya really doesn’t care, which is why she’s going to so much effort.
I like how much leeway the fans have given Joyce and Sarah for actively trying to destroy a healthy relationship vs. how Malaya is condemned for basically going, “Pfft, I bet Sal really thinks List-Guy is hot, well I’ll show her how you snag a hot guy.”
Like
Hitting on someone because you think your rival has some vague level of interest in them but isn’t acting on it and you want to show them up is about ten trillion degrees below actively trying to sabotage an ongoing and healthy relationship in the shitty-behavior-o-meter.
And she actively talked to Sal about it beforehand! Like she’s not being sneaky or deceitful here, she flat-out tells Sal, “Oh, so you’re interested in List Guy aren’t you?” and then when she says lolno tells Sal, “Pfft, suuuure watch me hit on him then” and then just walks up and tells Joe they should have sex.
Like Malaya is wrong about Sal’s supposed attraction to Joe, but has been completely and totally up front and honest about her intentions to every single person involved in this, which is so much more than we can say about our protagonist.
Well of course, how else is she going to gloat? She can’t show Sal how much better she is if she doesn’t let her know.
And yeah, Sarah’s definitely screwing up in trying to break up Raidah and Jacob. Joyce as well, though somewhat less so – at least her motivation isn’t directly “I want to hurt Raidah”. Her screwed up romance/matchmaking theories mixed up with her own hormones going crazy.
Any possibility that Malaya is quite aware of Marcie’s crush, and whatever-it-is that Carla has, and making a play for Joe in front of them is her way to avoid hurtful confrontations?
That seems rather subtle for her and even if she did have the patience for it she’d probably have gloated by now. Like yeah she’s an awful person and I wouldn’t put it past her in terms of how shitty she is but she’s also pretty impulsive and short-sighted.
Why should he pass up the opportunity? Casual sex with consenting women wasn’t the problem. Making a List and being something of a boundary-pushing horndog were problems. In this case he got jumped by another horndog. There is no problem here.
Bit of conversation interruptus with Joyce, but I’d forgive a friend for taking a chance like this. And it was Joe’s choice to bring up serious topics like Sarah, so it’s not like he’s walking away from Joyce’s cry for help or something.
Agree,
I think the rudest thing here is sticking Faz with Joyce, who I’m not even sure knows who he is, after he promised Amber to look after him. That’s legit uncool.
He knows enough to know that Faz is literally the physical embodiment of everything Joyce fears about men. And he left her there with him.
I’ve been hoping for Joe to catch something incurable, but now I realize that would be unfair to Malaya. So instead, I want him to be so utterly unable to perform that she mocks him loud enough for the rest of the floor to hear.
But even then, she’s being honest with him. “Let’s be hot together and make everyone hate us even more.” She’s not looking for an emotional connection, nor is she promising one.
Also if having a drive to find ways to get people to despise you as much as humanly possible is what Malaya is looking for in a man then I guess Mike is more of her type.
You’re as hopelessly optimistic as a Browns fan*, aren’t you?
*For people not fans of handegg: Browns is a team that didn’t win at all last season, and only once the season before that. I’m pretty sure everyone can imagine that this is not good.
It is not actually possible to be more hopelessly optimistic than a Browns fan. One winning season in the past decade, last time they made the playoffs was 2002…
I think there’s about a coin-flip’s chance that Joe is going to Dan it up by having to talk about his feelings, and be all “I’m trying to respect women more, but you seem into this, so that makes it okay, right? Let’s set some boundaries and ground rules,” at which point Malaya will nope out of there in boredom and/or frustration.
Hm, that could make sense. I thought I had remembered that Malaya was a-spec in the walkyverse, to the extent of only being attracted to ultra car. I mean, I guess Joe could have been one the people she was sexually attracted to in this universe, but I had been leaning on the idea that she doesn’t yet know she is ace and is essentially following a script.
Her being spite sexual could make sense. Though I do think that there is a considerable chance she hasn’t realised that yet. (I didn’t know I was a-spec when I was 18, and while ace awareness is rising, still wouldn’t be a surprise if she hasn’t figured out she is a spec)
Now, this is where I’ll probably come in and look rather rude…
I think that in Shortpacked, Malaya was slightly spite-sexual (she seemed to try and hook up with Leslie mainly to piss off Robin), but otherwise seemed pretty ace. But looking at her interactions with Ultra-Car, where she is so very, very turned on; it seems to me like she was sexual or at least demi; it was just that she was attracted to sentient humanoid-shaped robots, and there weren’t really anyone of those around for a while. So you know, it was practically indistinguishable from being ace until Ultra-Car came around.
I have to admit that I have only read short portions of Shortpacked. But I thought her trying to hook up with Leslie was her having realised she wasn’t into guys and that she sort of assumed that meant she was into girls, but then she wasn’t.
I thought she was demisexua or greysexual (both of which are aspec) .. greysexual I think having to do with a specific set of conditions that have to be met before being sexual. If she had a romantic relationship with ultracar before sexual feelings developed, could involve demisexuality, spiting people would be a type of greysexual ..
Was she Aro spec as well? I should read more Shortpacked.
It was a crossover so it might not count but she was going to (or maybe did) hook up with the male main character from that Megaplex webcomic after they bonded over mocking popular films.
She was really into it until he started talking about anime.
So still spite-sexual but even in shortpacked she’s more pan than lesbian.
Joyce has a couple minutes to figure out a plan before Faz bolts. Being in such close proximity to two college age women simultaneously must have stunned him.
Let’s look at the bright side. She will contain him so he won’t have the chance to annoy too many other people, she won’t tolerate his bullshit, and there is still a chance she might send the little creep to Abu Dhabi.
Uh…. Marcie never made her intentions clear to Malaya who has absolutely no cause to expect her to be jealous? I mean, Malaya’s being an abusive jerk to Sal and is just obnoxious overall, but this, right here? She’s guilty of nothing here except bad taste. (And maybe attemptitude jerkitude towards Sal and very much missing that mark.)
In either case it would make Marcie look like a dick. Remember, she’s not actually in a relationship with Malaya nor did she ever make her intent clear to the latter.
There’s this page where Malaya talks about Marcie having no ulterior motives while the latter is literally checking out her butt while Malaya’s not looking at her.
So yeah, wailing on anybody just because they didn’t magically pick up on something you intentionally hid from them? Not a nice thing to do.
But, isn’t, you know, the difference between people reacting to moves you make to get closer to them (like Marcie snuggling up to Malya when she was reading in bed) and people not reacting to it all the difference between making your interest clear in a polite way and being turned down in an equally polite way?
If they are also into you, they notice and respond, if not, not.
How many people you have dated have stated in so many words that they are interested?
I’m a lady who prefers nerds. I always state everything super clearly, and I highly recommend it!
My current romantic relationship, I typed: “Would you like to go to Coney Island this Saturday? I am totally asking you out!”
> “Would you like to go to Coney Island this Saturday? I am totally asking you out!”
It’s taken me a while to realize it, but this is the level of communication i need in a relationship. “Flirting” has always seemed to be simple but annoying ‘why are you even asking me that question’ questions and “double entendres” are just a sign of poor communication skills. Be clear, dammit!
Yeah, but if you’re relying on such clues, which is a totally acceptable way to go, you have to accept it when you don’t get the signals you’re looking for. Or proceed to the direct ask.
Just continuing to try the subtle signals and pretending there’s something there when there isn’t ain’t cool.
True, if you stick to subtle innuendo and get no response, you should read the subtle “no”. And when unsure, find a way to ask, but don’t pile on more subtle innuendo.
Oh, did he? I was remembering it as him helping look for a runaway Faz, which I think could be reasonably construed as not open-ended (it’s daytime, Faz is 15 or 17, we’re not talking about a missing toddler). If he made a promise to keep ‘custody’, dubious as that is, then breaking that is a bigger jerk move, agreed.
Excepting that he volunteered to watch him. He told amber and danny that he would watch faz.
He was the person currently tasked with looking out for faz. I mean, granted, 15 year olds don’t normally have a babysitter in the middle of the day, so this is more joe letting amber and joyce down (Joyce agreed to help, not to watch him on her own), rather than putting faz in danger.
The only danger Faz is in results from him being obnoxiously annoying to women. So I thought keeping an eye on Faz served to keep Faz out of women’s dorm rooms (not because of keeping Faz safe but because of keeping him from being obnoxious to women).
Very true. I was just trying to say that his responsibility stemmed less from faz being a minor and more towards the fact that he told amber he would look after him.
Well, I suspect Amber’s concern lies in Faz’s behavior getting the authorities involved and thus getting him in trouble with Blaine, which she wouldn’t wish even on Faz.
She hinted as much in one of the strips right after he showed up.
Marcie just wails on Joe on the front door stair way and Sals the one who hast to hold her back for once. And as Sal draggs her away they Leave Malaya a confused mess and Joe a beaten up even more confused mess. All while at the same time they’re both thinking, “The hells her deal ?”
You got you some, Malaya? GOOD FOR YOU. HIGH FIVE.
Heh, I hope she will to to coax Joe into putting the list online again and give her a ten, just to spite Sal. That would be a perfectly petty thing to do.
Best outcome? Malaya asks Joe what her rating is (because that’s the whole point of this interlude for her) and Joe explains why rating women is wrong.
At which point Malaya either 1)loses her shit at him, or 2)experiences some personal growth.
Aren’t we all glad Faz is left with Joyce so he can get some proper guidance?
“Faz yearns to learn what an ‘hanky panky’ is.”
“ALL RIGHT, just so you can avoid it until you are married. When a man and a woman loves each other very much (I still haven’t figured out the other combinations so don’t ask) he takes his thing and he rubs her tummy…”
Because Malaya isn’t doing anything wrong from her perspective. Except to the extent that part of her motivation is that she thinks Sal is secretly interested in Joe because she’s acting not interested and she assumes everything Sal says is the opposite of what she really feels, but even then it’s not like they’re in a relationship so it’s a pretty small level of spite in the grand scheme of things, less than they normally exhibit to each other in every conversation tbh.
Joe I think gets a lot of undeserved grief from the comments section- like I think the whole List plot has been really over-hyped by fans and for that matter the comic itself- but here he’s actually being kind of shitty by bailing on Joyce not just in the middle of an important Feelings conversation, but especially by dumping Faz on her after promising to look after him. I do *understand* why he’s panicking and running away, but it’s still a shitty thing to do.
*) There is no deep reason for Joe to swear off sex. There’s maybe good reason for him to put hitting on women on hiatus until he examines his attitudes, but that doesn’t apply here.
*) He’s walking away from a serious conversation that he started, not Joyce; he’s not abandoning a cry for help. It’s a bit rude, but opportunity knocks.
*) Faz is too bizarre a character to reason about realistically. But “stepbrother of my future stepsister, who will never be part of my actual family” is pretty low-obligation.
If anyone’s being a jerk here, it’s Malaya, for snagging Joe for the purpose of messing with Sal. Then again, she may find Joe genuinely hot, and he’s infamously single. So…
Well, Joe seems to think he’s backsliding. “Lasted longer than I expected to.”
I agree that this wouldn’t normally be bad – other than dumping Faz on Joyce and Malaya’s screwed up motivations, but if he does see it as backsliding he’s likely to take it as a confirmation he can’t be any better and go back to something like his old ways.
Wouldn’t you say he has an obligation to see through the serious conversation *he* started to the end, though, rather than bailing on it the instant it seems to turn in a direction that’s not wholly convenient for him? Like sure, there’s no reason for him to swear off sex, but accepting a proposition under these circumstances isn’t exactly a good look for him from anyone else’s perspective.
Eh, I view obligations as situational, not absolute. Like when the apparent costs change. Anyway, is he obliged to continue a conversation that’s not comfortable for him?
I’m still more disappointed in Joyce than Joe. At least Joe’s knows he’s falling off the wagon. Joyce is being told she’s getting pushed onto the tracks and doesn’t believe it.
I’m not sure if you can really call Joe’s actions here a relapse. I mean, Malaya basically walked up to him and said: “I want to have sex with you and I suspect that you want sex with me.” For someone like Joe, that’s pretty much a brain-bypass.
That said, I’m hoping that there are nasty consequences for both principals in this little display.
I don’t think Joyce thinks Joe’s making up the Sarah thing. Like, she seemed incredulous at first, but her asking Joe about his honest appraisal of her would imply to me that she thinks he’s in fact telling the truth, or at the least, the truth as he understands it. She’s definitely not outright dismissing it.
Knowing to tread lightly on this topic, that was an in-joke based on the Walkyverse, where after Ruth’s death Billie starts dating Danny. At that time it wasn’t known that Danny was bi, so his presence was a sneaky little joke by Willis, since he knew it would be seen as just an illustration of Billie’s bisexuality. Unless we’re thinking of different things.
Willis did a chart/graphic of all the characters who were bi in canon, because Mr. Willis himself is bi. Malaya is (sorta) bi in the Walkyverse, but I haven’t seen what her canon orientation is in the Dumbiverse. I’m hoping she’s bi so Marcie doesn’t get her heart broken any more.
Sexuality transfers over from the Walkyverse, and she dated two women in Shortpacked. So she’s probably into women in some regard. The question is if she’s interested in the women who are interested in her.
In some ways, Joe was under pretty unprecedented pressure here. I think that Malaya couldn’t have done a better job of pushing his buttons if she’d tried!
Meanwhile… Well, Carla is out (who can blame her) and I think that Sal and Marcie have a long, hard conversation ahead of them.
I mean I get why he does it to himself. But literally it was that “I have a more toxic attitude to fuck buddies than I care to admit because I have unresolved issues of emotional processing,” that got him into so much shit. I get it, but dude. YOU WERE SO CLOSE TO LEARNING.
I mean, I realize as I talk to myself that this strip isn’t called “Everyone makes informed, healthy, decisions all the time.”
But is it because I’m mad at them that I’m holding them to a higher standard? Do I assume they should know better? Or is this me being mad at my OWN bad decisions? Hmm.
Fuck off Joe you were close. DID YOU SEE JOYCE’S PUPPY DOG EYES? YOUR OWN? FUCK OFF, JOE
i doubt this is the end. When making big life changes youre bound to fall into old habits before youre better.
e.g. You dont usually break an addiction on the first attempt to quit. Most people give in, but it’s a process. Simply trying to quit is a sign. It’s kinda like that. He’s falling into old habits since Malaya is the only girl who actually wants to have sex with him atm (and i think Joe might actually be a sex addict)
To be completely fair Joe didn’t exactly Fall back into old habits. His problem was objectifying women and treating them as nothing more than sex tools. He doesn’t need to swear off sex, he just needs to start treating women like actual people, not cardboard cut-outs with a hole at crotch level, sorry for my crudeness.
Yeah, he didn’t wrong Roz, and he’s wronging Malaya even less, given she knows about the list, and is the one making the move even with this knowledge. She’s doing it to spite Sal, seemingly, but then again, Joe’s canonically considered a pretty good looking dude, so maybe she’s just down for some casual sex.
Somehow Sal over there makes me think “Damn, is this what Malaya does when she thinks I don’t care about something? I need to care even less about stuff, that way she’ll make an ass out of herself more often”
My first instinct is to assume that Joyce will simply sit idly with Faz around, watching Joe and Malaya walk of.
But honestly, I personally would love for Joyce to snap out of her disappointment in Joe, and simply drag Faz after them, dumping Faz onto him.
I mean, it’s not as if they literally “ran” of – they are in walking distance!
[Singsong tone] You think she’s preeretty~ You wanna slow-dance with her at night with one of those spinning light ball things throwing little circles of light onto her freckly fasaace~ I’m not projecting at aaaall~
Oh yeah I want to slow dance with her on the balcony, slowly moving towards the edge before throwing her over it into the trash container that’s a meter or two below.
What was that sound of glass breaking? I do think that was Marcie’s heart. Poor Carla’s heart is likely too calloused and abused because of the life she’s had which, in its own way, is even more tragic.
That had nothing to do with being a lesbian. Everyone will sometime meet a person they are into who is not into them. Happens to straight cis guys all the time, but some of them make a point of being all angry about it.
Hm,
Wait , this might make total sense for Maylaya Motivations.
She isnt clueless at all how other women feel about the list.
She gets to be the woman who breaks the Joe -Boycott and ruins it for the sisterhood. She wants to be Notorious, like Joe.
OH!
( i mistakenly thought she was just spiteing Sal. Nope! )
I really cant fault Malaya ( I mean I can but … ) .
She is Hot here , just like she said. . So is Joe. Her confidence is sexy. she knows what she wants and goes for it.
Oddly marcie just learned she was ( maybe ) trying to seduce Maylaya the wrong way.
Joyce looks so funny to me in this strip. Her expressions seems overly dramatic. Plus her dialogue is just two people’s names. But I get it; she’s just kind of speechless. I don’t ship Joe and Joyce, so what’s awful about Joe’s behaviour here for me is LEAVING HER ALONE WITH FAZ THE LITTLE CREEP-ASS.
Joyce yells, ”SAL, HEEEEEELLLLP” as she grips Faz tightly. But then Faz wriggles out of his jacket which Joyce was gripping. And then Sal and Joyce have to do another high speed motorcycle chase!!!
She just enjoys being an asshole, especially to Sal whom she particularly dislikes. She thought Sal liked Joe because she was talking to him(i think?) so she saw hooking up with Joe as an opportunity to one-up Sal.
Joe’s hand went straight to the right boob. They’re going to fuck for hours like rabbits. Joe has a lot of ground to recover from the past dry days. Well, it was to be expected that he cannot hold out for long once he gets an opportunity.
I’m pretty sure any attempt to spend time with Malaya immediately after the sex will be something he’d regret now, and would probably regret pre-list exposure, on account of it will be Malayla being Malayla.
Honestly Marcie might have been done a favor here. She’s just got a big hard-to-ignore “this is who Malaya is” message. That might be helpful in the long run.
Honestly there is an astounding amount of nice guy logic floating around the comments here with regard to Malaya.
First of all, Marcie has never told Malaya she has a crush on her. Malaya is clearly quite oblivious to this (as evidenced in her “Marcie’s always been straight with me” comic/gag.)
Secondly, Malaya views Marcie as a friend and thinks that they’re just friends. If Marcie views this friendship as just a way to get in Malaya’s pants then she’s the one being a shitty manipulative person.
Thirdly Malaya is entitled to fuck whoever she wants, she doesn’t owe Malaya anything even if she did know about her crush.
Yeah, only thing Malaya could be said to be doing bad with respect to Marcie is that Marcie asked her to be nicer to Sal, and spitefucking a dude to slight her isn’t really doing that. Then again, Malaya might just want to bone Joe, anyway. She did call him hot, and Joe’s generally presented as one of the best looking guys in the school (Jacob is his own tier, followed by Joe and Ethan).
I mean kind of, but she also actually talked to Sal about it in what, for Malaya, amounts to a friendly way, or at least friendly rival way. This was more a, “Ah, you’re trying to play hard to get, aren’t ya. Let me show you the RIGHT way to get in List Guy’s pants.” Like she’s not going behind Sal’s back at all (disregarding that Sal actually just doesn’t care about Joe.)
So there’s some amount of wanting to show Sal up but it’s a lot less malicious than people are acting like.
A) Just because Malaya thinks it’s not malicious or shitty doesn’t mean it’s actually not.
B) While you are correct that Malaya doesn’t know Marcie likes her and wouldn’t be obligated to date her even if she did, people are still allowed to feel sorry for Marcie knowing her crush won’t be reciprocated – she’s not done anything shitty yet (especially since it seems like she DOES enjoy hanging out with Malaya aside from wanting to bang her).
I wonder how disappointed Marcie will be. I’m sort of afraid Marcie will be really upset. Sal will then be mad at Malaya, leading to Malaya to think she got under Sal’s skin. Then maybe Sal will blow up on Malaya and out Marcie’s secret crush. That would probably be bad for everyone involved. I shall hope that Marcie isn’t devastated by this
So many subroutines running in the background, using up memory…
When is Dorothy going to wake up and realize she 1) she overslept, and 2) she may have had unprotected sex? (A possibility given the haste and mental dishevelment)
Why is Faz here? WTF has Blaine done now?
Joyce is going to circle back around to “Sarah wants you to be with Jacob” and confront Sarah.
Joyce is incredulous at Joe’s departure. But she’ll dream about Jacob tonight.
And maybe, hopefully, Marcie will turn to Sal and they’ll work things out. They are real friends and it’s just wrong for them to be apart like that.
I think that Walky understands how important it is to Dorothy that sex is very protected, and even if she was too tired to make sure all protections were in place I think Walky would make sure that they were. Though I guess if Dorothy was actively telling him that the protection didn’t matter… but even then.
..
I mean that could even be why Dorothy had substainlly more clothes on than him. She could have decided that the easiest way to protect herself was to not involve her genitals. Or for them to switch off in ways that would minimise risk. I definitely sometimes was like we are not going to have our underwear off at the same time because I was terrified of getting pregnant.
I’d assume given the earlier line about her protocols, that she’s using some kind of long term contraception, the pill or an iud or some such, in addition to condoms. So a lapse here would be unlikely to have serious consequences.
And I’d assume Walky would remember.
And I’d assume we’re not going to have a pregnancy scare storyline. (Certainly not an actual pregnancy one. It would be years before she could even know she was pregnant.
Okay, I just realized that Joe’s being a little jerky by abandoning Joyce out in the open when she’s got her phobia. But… she still ran out here on her own and can quite easily get back to the dorms.
Joe’s shooting down the glimmer of a chance that he just had with Joyce. I wonder if he’s obtuse? Or if he thinks he doesn’t deserve Joyce and he’s sinking his ship on purpose
He knows that if he dated Joyce he’d hurt her, just like his father hurt his mom. He’d been made to realize that even his emotion-free ways were still hurting people, but that didn’t make him think he’d be safe in an actual relationship.
Slightly off topic, but I was just listening to Professor Stephen Pinker (Harvard) talk on the radio about his new book “Enlightenment Now”. He is very proud of the 75 graphs and charts it contains.
I see the relevance, however, I have to note I’d be proud of having 75 graphs as well, because that means those have not only be designed but also discussed and that is a heck load of work, including the transformation of information into a comprehensible graph itself.
Is it more succinct and readable than The Better Angels of Our Nature? I had to slog through that book. Does it address the lead and crime hypothesis? I found Pinker’s explanation of the rise and fall of crime between the Sixties and the Noughties in BAoON unsatisfactory. Has Pinker connected the violent culture of the South, African-Americans, and the poor in America with bad policing yet? I thought that was obvious from his sources, but he wittered on about Antebellum culture and getting democracy before freedom.
Alright people are hating on Joe here a lot, but I’ll defend him a tiny bit even if he is making the wrong choice here. He’s only recently been trying to break his old bad habits, and old habits die hard, and some random hot chick is walking up to him and basically offering him free sex. (GOD DAMN IT MALAYA)
Now obviously actually taking her up on this right now is a terrible choice, but being fair, he hasn’t gone cold turkey for long enough to make the right choice here. What will determine whether this is him being an asshole or just relapsing into bad habits will be how he comports himself AFTER this.
And lots of people have also defended Joe on that. All context aside, there’s no real issue with Joe hooking up with Malaya. Her motivations are all screwed up, but that’s not Joe’s fault.
Dumping Faz on Joyce is his fault. That he sees this as falling off the wagon is a problem, since it makes it more likely he’ll drop back into his old self. That he’s just walking off on a deep conversation with Joyce might be understandable, but it’s still a jerk move.
And I suspect the true crux of this hasn’t hit yet. It’s not afterwards that we’ll see, it’s when he finds out that Malaya’s throwing herself at him BECAUSE of the list and his old reputation. That’s going to be a challenge.
No, Amber did not. Likely because she didn’t want even Faz to get into trouble with Blaine.
And this is the first time he’s been dumped on anyone. Joe volunteered, thinking he was helping Amber and Danny hookup.
Joe is dumb and Malaya is evil. Is it a pattern that Joe only has sex with evil women like Robin’s sister, Penny and Malaya? Those women are assholes and desperate for sex.
Wait now Roz is evil? And Malaya is evil? And Penny is evil?
Being an asshole /=/ being evil. Also Malaya is 18 and Penny is in her early 20s, of course they want to get laid. And for some reason no value judgement on Joe wanting to get laid, just the “evil” ladies.
Being oblivious to Marcie’s crush on her doesn’t make Malaya evil. Going for it when a super hot woman throws herself at you means that Joe is a normal 18 year old, not that he’s an idiot (in fact I’d argue that turning that Malaya down would make him an idiot). Even if he knew that Malaya was “evil” (which he doesn’t, and also which she isn’t) he’s still 18 and would have a hell of a time not giving in to the temptation.
“I assume everyone hates me for being better than them and I’m fine with that. I also assume you feel the same way.” Nope, no warning signs there whatsoever.
Okay, they aren’t evil, but they are jerks. Penny accused Jason without evidence and for fun (yes, he did the act, but she didn’t knew), and even told him that she can get away with things because she is popular; Roz is a manipulative bastard and an hypocrite that uses liberal ideas as an excuse for her selfishness (even Leslie told her to shut up); and Malaya can be considered just an annoying person that doesn’t wnat to make peace just because she has the same fake bravado as Sal.
Evil is too strong indeed but Roz was kinda manipulative. The only reason she had sex with Joe and then published that tape was to get back at her family, try to ruin their reputation and all that. Also the whole thing Could have hurt Joe.
Okay this is just hilarious. I’ve always laughed at the irony of the uber-feminist having sex with the most chauvinistic duchebro in the entire cast but this, this is absolute peak of comedy XD
To quote: “Joe’s technique is okay, but his best quality is his stamina.”
And “Sometimes, if I can’t line up anybody else, I know he’s always available for more.”
Okay, I have to ask, at this point only four (well five if you count Faz), will know Joe and Malaya hooked up, how is that going to translate into everyone hating them more? Are they going to have sex on the front lawn?
Also, does this mean I will need to renew my Slipshine account?
Well if they’re not having sex on the front lawn then presumably they’re going back to someone’s dorm room and more people will see them along the way. I mean. I don’t think it’s unreasonable to assume word of sex happenings will get around, that tends to be how gossip mills work.
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[Carla Rutten avatar] Bored.
Carla was not a shipper of Joelaya.
I’m more concerned for Marcie who appears to have gone full Blue Screen of Death.
Noticed that now. Wonder if she’ll talk to Sal about it…
who is a shipper of joelaya, someone has to be
I ship it if it means Marcie will make up with Sal.
It most definitely does not mean that. Malaya is only getting with Joe to spite Sal.
Which could be the wake up call for Marcie, as she’d finally couldn’t deny that even the nicest-looking ass is not worth it enough to ignore the stench that comes from an asshole like Malaya.
I can hateship them!
It lasted three hours. It was like you slept in one day after having sex.
That’s long by Joe standards.
It’s been a couple of days.
That said, it wasn’t like he turned down women in that time. He just didn’t hit on any women in that time.
The first woman to come on to him, and he jumps at the chance.
Of course, it had the added benefits of dumping Faz sitting duty on someone else and avoiding Joyce’s pointed question.
I was counting from the end of his and Danny’s day of shenanigans when it actually set in but Joyce broke her toe after that, didn’t she?
Yes she did. I think this is day two of the broken toe
But it was the hitting on women and rating them that was the problem. There’s nothing actually wrong with him jumping at Malaya’s offer, right?
Other than dumping Faz on Joyce and walking out on their conversation.
Honestly, I think this really has way more to do with running away from Joyce’s question than it has to do with Malaya’s offer.
I mean, I would also take any possible escape of a really awkward situation so I ain’t gonna fault Joe on this one
Mainly I fault him for abandoning his assumed responsibility of watching Faz.
Yeah, Malaya is only 0.2 Fazes on the obnoxiometer.
I am still trying to figure out how, in Joe’s mind, it is in any way, shape, or form Joyce’s responsibility to watch Faz.
She’s standing there.
But does she have style and flair?
Does that make Mary C. C.?
Plot twist: Joe is not a very good babysitter and he kinda let his new stepsister down.
I’m hoping Joe realizes through all this that it doesn’t take a monogamous relationship to seriously let someone down by folliowing his junk around.
Then again, I do think people crack down on Joelaya too hard.
Aside from the awful Faz situation Joe dumped on Joyce, Malaya’s words are the truth; they’re attracted to each other and consenting adults, badabing badaboom.
Well, there’s also the awful part where she’s doing this to show Sal up, but that’s not Joe’s responsibility.
Also, Joe doesn’t even know about that part.
I’m trying to figure out why a fifteen-year-old needs watching.
I have a VERY strong feeling we will se a good example pretty soon.
Sure. If Faz isn’t watched he’ll go and creep the women’s dorm, someone will call campus security, and he’ll be handed over to child services for safe disposal. I get that.
But why does Faz behave in such a bizarre way? Was he raised in a cupboard without human contact?
Amber was raised by Blaine and got an intense amount of self loathing out of it. While she’s still a social outcast (though less than she thinks she is), her fear of doing wrong caused her to have the motto:
“I don’t make the rules, I just live in fear of them.”
which is why she’s still more well-adjusted than Dina is in many ways, because she’s very sensitive to being perceived as weird.
I’m guessing that Faz coped by swinging the other way and holding on to a weird self-image where he’s a God amongst men and his parents are just ignorant.
Both of them coped by spending way too much time on the internet.
I am really not on board with your definition of not being well adjusted. Dina generally seems happy and is liked by her peers. She is infaltised by them, which bothers her, but people are starting to see her as a young adult more and more.
Like it is upsetting when people see different as being badly adjusted. She’s happy, and as far as we know her academic side is going fine too.
Dina is adjusting very quickly, but look at her earlier appearances where she was learning basic social skills from Amber, of all people.
He carried over pretty much entirely unchanged from previous universes which were much less focused on a realistic setting and thus he feels jarringly out of place in a slice-of-life college dramedy where people more or less act like real human beings that could conceivably exist.
You americans have funny colleges where this is “people that could realisticaly exist”
Joyce offered to help watch Faz about five minutes ago, for excellent reasons.
“A second pair of eyes” does not directly imply “I’ll do everything while you fuck of and… fuck.”, but I can sure see how Joe choses to read it that way.
Meanwhile I sorta hope Joyce lets that little turd go off on his own. She has no obligation to look after him. That was Joe’s responsibility.
If he needs a keeper, it’s his parents’ responsibility, or his school’s. He not a toddler.
She has no real obligation, but she did say she’s help Amber since Amber protected Dorothy, so I expect she’ll feel a perceived obligation to watch Faz
Nah, Joyce needs to pass him on to someone else. I want Faz passed around the whole cast by the end of the day. Either ending with Dina tying him up again or someone casually asking Amber to keep an eye on him.
Wasn’t that an explicit responsibility?
I think this was a reply to me, so: “assumed responsibility” means a responsibility he took on. If you do a quick Google search for “assumed,” it should come up as the second definition for the word, which will hopefully make it make more sense.
It’s definitely the less commonly used meaning for the word, so I can see how it could be confusing.
Also, to be fair, if I didn’t know Malaya and an IRL version of her came up to me and said that while having the expression in panel 2, I would do the same. Of course, if Malaya said such things to ladies, then Marcie wouldn’t be internally screaming right now. Still… that panel 2 face… damn.
Faz has already drawn a chart showing his arousal at panel 2 Malaya’s face.
Behold, our utterly predictable response.
Well, that sucks
Ugh
*insert that “I was rooting for you! We were all rooting for you! gif*
To what, keep an eye on Faz? This changes nothing. A casual hookup is fine, it’s not the same as treating women like objects.
I mean, yeah, watching Faz, and how he himself sees to view this as backsliding, which in turn can feed into additional backsliding.
I have nothing against casual hookups. They are literally all my sexual relationships.
I personally am worried Joe might backslide a bit into jackassery. Not so far as to make an outright ‘List 2.0’ or any of his worst behaviour, but just…more like he was instead of who he’s been trying to be.
If his New list is women who chose Joe, on purpose, to make his list…
~ Ok that has its own set if problems, but at least its consensual.
Malaya IS going feel cheated if he doesnt put her on the list , and give her a 10
Weird, i actually care how Malaya feels right now.
I never did before.
Yeah, no, I’m still gonna say ‘don’t put your bang book online for people to subscribe to’.
Yeah, took me a bit to see that’s likely where this is going. Joe hasn’t faced the actual threat to his new resolve yet.
Malaya’s not just a hot girl who offered him sex – there’s no real problem with that. She actually wants him because of the list, because of Old Joe’s reputation. That’s going to screw him up big time when he finds out.
Which he will, because she’s going to ask about the list.
For me I was rooting less for Joe keeping an eye on Faz and more for Joe sticking with this difficult conversation and sitting with his emotional vulnerability a little. But alas.
It’s that too, but if he’s not ready for the conversation, I can be sympathetic to that. But like, “This person expressed sexual interest in me, so I’m going to go hookup with her”– cool. “This person expressed sexual interest in me, so I’m going to walk away in the middle of a conversation with a friend and leave her responsible for a task I volunteered to take on to help another friend…to hookup with the first person”– less cool.
Ah, yeah, that makes a lot of sense. I was so focused on Joe bailing in the first place that I managed to gloss over that Joe dumping Faz on Joyce makes the whole thing extra uncool.
(And to be clear, I totally think it’s fine to excuse yourself from uncomfortable conversations you aren’t prepared to have — it’s just that this is so not the way to do it.)
There’s one other issue, as well. Joe KNOWS about Joyce’s history, and thus her feelings about being objectified, and how it hurts her.
And he just left her alone. With Faz.
I am currently hoping he catches something distinctly horrible from Malaya.
Honestly, I’m kinda hoping Joyce punches Faz in the nose. Granted, Faz, being Faz, will probably see it as a sexual thing, but it’ll still be enjoyable to watch.
You were the chosen one!
Is that a multiplex reference?
It’s a Star Wars reference.
So, yes.
“Yes, I was. This hot chick right here chose ME! Who am I to say no?”
God dammit, Malaya.
Though on that note, it should be interesting to see how Marcie responds to this development.
I suspect it depends how seriously she wanted to date Malaya – if it was closer to ‘I really want to bang her and maybe dating her after that would be nice’ than she might be okay. If it’s closer to ‘I really want to go out with her’ I suspect she’ll be more upset.
Myeh, she didn’t do anything wrong. She propositioned a person and they were down with it.
And I can only feel bad for Marcie to a point. If you don’t state your feelings, you don’t have any right to be mad if someone else doesn’t respect them.
Not knowingly, no, but it’s like offering a recovering alcoholic a drink, or (more relevantly with Jacob’s “Shortpacked!” continuity) a sex addict a new partner.
She didn’t know he was swearing off sex or what have you either. I mean, she’s going for a guy to avoid dealing with her desire to hate fuck Sal, but other than that the worst thing she did was proposition a basic stranger who was well know for taking on all comers.
Again, true – but you’d still express frustration if someone did that to a recovering addict, knowingly or not. Hence – “God dammit, Malaya.”
Not really. It’s Joe who assumed he wasn’t getting sex anytime soon, his problem was how he was treating women, not that he was getting laid.
I mean the fact that she seems to have done it largely to spite Sal is pretty fucked up even if she’s an idiot and in reality Sal couldn’t give less of a damn about this.
> in reality Sal couldn’t give less of a damn about this.
Malaya appears to be incapable of understanding that people have different opinions than her. She’s projecting what she would feel if she was in Sal’s position onto Sal.
This isn’t the first time she’s done something like this, and if she is to have any personal growth in this comic it will be learning that not everyone thinks the way she does.
I love you Carla.
That is all.
Why is it I’m only now noticing Carla has no skates?
Maybe she has heelies, while Joe is off escaping his feelies.
I appreciate this comment.
You win best comment of the day.
She broke her skates a few days ago. Not sure if she fixed or replaced them yet.
NOO DAMMIT! THE SHIPPING!!! DON”T LEAVE JOYCE !!!! NOOOOOOOOOO!!!
They were getting along, feeling really comfortable and happy with each other…
And then Joyce tried to make Joe talk about FEELINGS.
He found an easy out.
Later, Mike crotch-kicks Joe for Joe stealing the hatef–k schtick.
*plays Diana Ross’ “I’m Coming Out” on the P.A. speakers for Carla*
Malaya sees this and falls for Mike.
Their hate-fucks destroy the planet.
I feel like Mike would be completely disgusted by Malaya.
I’m pretty sure we should all be resigned to everyone falling back into their same shitty habits. Walky and Dorothy already failed so it’s only natural that the conga line continues.
I’m looking at you Billy, Ruth, Amber, Mary, Sarah, etc.
Walky and Dorothy’s shitty habit of…being in a relationship together?
A caring relationship, at that.
Not taking care of themselves? Having a terrible work/life balance?
Walky and Dorothy are like the opposite sides of those coins. Walky doesn’t take care of himself because he’s self-indulgent and lazy and Dorothy doesn’t because she’s pushing herself too hard. Walky works far too little and Dorothy far too much.
So together they average out!
But that doesn’t seem like something they can be said to have failed to change at this point. Because really, the change they made and then went back on was whether they were together.
spiiiiiiiiite
Malaya kinda sounds like malaise.
Next episode: Joyce converts Faz to Christianity. Fax goes door to door processing with the use of charts.
*Faz
*Professing
No, autocorkpuller was right. It’s funnier that way.
did you write “autocorkpuller” on purpose, or…
Proselytizing, Faz would be proselytizing with charts and graphs (and confusing people).
“This relationship chart shows Faz’s connection to the risen savior.”
“As you can see, Faz is closer than anyone else.
This means, if you are hot, you should worship Faz, and offer to have sex with him.”
Jeez, what’s the point of even having a fax machine if you still need to process your charts door to door.
Cheers, Joe. Pound her good for all of us worthless shmo’s who will never have the opportunity!
Oh for fuck’s sake. Goddammit Joe.
Welp, now I’m bummed out. Way to go, Joe. Joyce deserves better than your garbage anyway.
Sadly, he left her to babysit his garbage.
Not *really* his garbage. He was trying to be nice to Amber. He has no more obligation to look after Faz than Joyce does.
Hell, even Amber’s obligation is pretty tenuous, but her father is Faz’s step-father so there’s *something*.
Well, he PROMISED Amber he would look after the little creep, so…
http://www.dumbingofage.com/2018/comic/book-8/03-faz-is-great/handle-2/
Ah, thanks. I had forgotten that.
He has an obligation to his promise, and an obligation as a friend to NOT put Joyce, of all people, in a horrible situation where she has to deal with the living embodiment of the manosphere.
I hope they haven’t found a cure for whatever he gets from Malaya.
Well, Joyce isn’t wearing her bracer, so her wrist shoul be good for some more punching.
Dammit, I was actually starting to have high hopes for Joe.
God dammit, Joe. I know change is hard and vulnerability is worse but UGH.
And with this Joe and Malaya have officially pissed off everyone observing both fictional and none fictional.
All I haft to say I feel sorry for Marcie but I sort of saw this coming, also Joe you fucking worthless disappointment, ando Malaya careful what you wish for.
I don’t know what Malaya would have to do to bother me, but it’d be more dramatic than this.
Faz is not pissed, only aroused.
Faz is aroused by a stiff breeze, he’s 15.
I am honestly not bothered by Malaya in the least, here. She’s being upfront about this being just a casual hook-up, she’s not actively trying to destroy anyone’s relationship, and she’s not breaking any established commitments, violating any school policies or manipulating others to do what she wants.
So, I want everyone else in the strip to realize that they now need to look to Malaya for moral and ethical guidance, and to feel bad about that fact.
If I’m mad about anything here it’s that I got blue balled out of story progression.
Have faith in The Willis. He well get back to that . . . eventually.
I’m bothered by Malaya’s apparent motivation here – that she’s doing this to get one up on Sal (on something she mistakenly thinks Sal cares about).
It’s not great but like, they’re not in a relationship so this is a pretty paltry level of spite compared to what Sarah and Joyce are doing.
Poor Marcie.
Seriously look at Marcie she looks like she seen a ghost.
Eh, if you don’t communicate how you feel to people this is generally the kind of thing that happens. Plus I don’t have a lot of sympathy for Marcie because she was weird and underhanded about her interest in Malaya.
Marcie’s too nice to gain Malaya’s interest. Malaya only lusts after jerks.
No, that’s Carla.
And if a guy was doing what Marcie’s been doing, I wouldn’t have any sympathy for him, either–it’s literal Nice Guy Syndrome. She gets some pity, but she needs to own her crap.
I guess that depends on your definition of “Nice Guy Syndrome”. If she turns on Malaya or starts demanding “earned” sex, that’s over the line.
I’m not sure hanging out with someone you’re interested in and not getting up the nerve to make a blatant move actually qualifies.
Woah, Marcie hasn’t done anything Nice Guy – y yet. Hanging out with someone and not being ready to ask them out (especially when said asking out may involve coming out to them) is not quite the same thing as getting pissy and acting like a tool when they’re not interested even though you were ‘so nice’.
I do actually have a pet theory that Malaya thinks Marcie has a crush on Sal, and is doing this to help Marcie and Sal “make up”.
Otherwise, yeah, kinda a dick move, Malaya. Not as bad as Joe, though.
Malaya is down to find out about all of Joe’s dick moves.
There we go, I knew someone would bite on that setup.
I don’t think Malaya was actually aware that Marcie had a crush on her. Remember that page where she talked Marcie about always having been straight with her, i.e. not having any ulterior motives? The same page features Marcie checking out her butt.
So yeah, I kinda fail to see how that’s a dick move, considering Malaya probably doesn’t know what we do.
Well I mean, she’s literally out to “steal Joe” from Sal because she perceives Sal as being interested in Joe for… some reason. I would consider that alone as a dick move.
Yeah, there are no positive motives here for Malaya she just wants to hurt Sal.
how would this even hurt Sal , if she has no interest in Joe?
It won’t but Malaya is as stupid as she is malicious and thinks Sal IS interested.
It won’t. But Malaya thinks it will. She’ll fool around with Joe and get a better rating than Sal and that’ll show Sal up because Sal’s a poser who’s just pretending not to care about it, while Malaya really doesn’t care, which is why she’s going to so much effort.
I like how much leeway the fans have given Joyce and Sarah for actively trying to destroy a healthy relationship vs. how Malaya is condemned for basically going, “Pfft, I bet Sal really thinks List-Guy is hot, well I’ll show her how you snag a hot guy.”
Like
Hitting on someone because you think your rival has some vague level of interest in them but isn’t acting on it and you want to show them up is about ten trillion degrees below actively trying to sabotage an ongoing and healthy relationship in the shitty-behavior-o-meter.
And she actively talked to Sal about it beforehand! Like she’s not being sneaky or deceitful here, she flat-out tells Sal, “Oh, so you’re interested in List Guy aren’t you?” and then when she says lolno tells Sal, “Pfft, suuuure watch me hit on him then” and then just walks up and tells Joe they should have sex.
Like Malaya is wrong about Sal’s supposed attraction to Joe, but has been completely and totally up front and honest about her intentions to every single person involved in this, which is so much more than we can say about our protagonist.
Well of course, how else is she going to gloat? She can’t show Sal how much better she is if she doesn’t let her know.
And yeah, Sarah’s definitely screwing up in trying to break up Raidah and Jacob. Joyce as well, though somewhat less so – at least her motivation isn’t directly “I want to hurt Raidah”. Her screwed up romance/matchmaking theories mixed up with her own hormones going crazy.
At no point have I condoned Joyce or Sarah’s behaviour in this situation they’re both being terrible.
Any possibility that Malaya is quite aware of Marcie’s crush, and whatever-it-is that Carla has, and making a play for Joe in front of them is her way to avoid hurtful confrontations?
Honestly, I’m starting to wonder if Malaya’s only hanging out with Marcie to show Sal she can take her best friend away.
I may have a slightly less positive take on Malaya than you 🙂
That seems rather subtle for her and even if she did have the patience for it she’d probably have gloated by now. Like yeah she’s an awful person and I wouldn’t put it past her in terms of how shitty she is but she’s also pretty impulsive and short-sighted.
I hope so. It just kind of came to me this morning.
I can’t be too mad at Joe, if I needed to escape a situation like that and a hot girl gave me an out, my resolve might not be that strong either
Carla, that one applies for everyone except Sal.
Dammit, Joe.
And don’t give me that. The fact that opportunities are scarcer doesn’t change the fact that you didn’t last beyond your very first one.
Why should he pass up the opportunity? Casual sex with consenting women wasn’t the problem. Making a List and being something of a boundary-pushing horndog were problems. In this case he got jumped by another horndog. There is no problem here.
Bit of conversation interruptus with Joyce, but I’d forgive a friend for taking a chance like this. And it was Joe’s choice to bring up serious topics like Sarah, so it’s not like he’s walking away from Joyce’s cry for help or something.
Agree,
I think the rudest thing here is sticking Faz with Joyce, who I’m not even sure knows who he is, after he promised Amber to look after him. That’s legit uncool.
He knows enough to know that Faz is literally the physical embodiment of everything Joyce fears about men. And he left her there with him.
I’ve been hoping for Joe to catch something incurable, but now I realize that would be unfair to Malaya. So instead, I want him to be so utterly unable to perform that she mocks him loud enough for the rest of the floor to hear.
How much does he know about Faz?
He’s seen the charts.
Yeah, honestly co-signed. This is about the least objectionable thing Malaya or Joe have done in like an in-strip week.
Nah, Malaya is doing it to spite Sal because she thinks she likes him so it’s pretty objectionable.
But even then, she’s being honest with him. “Let’s be hot together and make everyone hate us even more.” She’s not looking for an emotional connection, nor is she promising one.
Also if having a drive to find ways to get people to despise you as much as humanly possible is what Malaya is looking for in a man then I guess Mike is more of her type.
I totally seen Mike and Malaya forming a relationship straight out of https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cruel_Intentions
Cartoonishly evil young adults take more pleasure out of messing with people’s heads more then messing around ? Yeah sounds like them.
I can’t imagine them lasting very long. Both of them would want to be the boss.
*facepalm*
I think he’s using her as an excuse to exit the conversation. I don’t think they’re going to do anything.
Or at least, that’s what I’m hoping.
You’re as hopelessly optimistic as a Browns fan*, aren’t you?
*For people not fans of handegg: Browns is a team that didn’t win at all last season, and only once the season before that. I’m pretty sure everyone can imagine that this is not good.
I’m a Texans fan, so it might be even worse!
It is not actually possible to be more hopelessly optimistic than a Browns fan. One winning season in the past decade, last time they made the playoffs was 2002…
Compare: http://www.clevelandbrowns.com/team/history/year-by-year-results.html vs. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Houston_Texans_seasons
Sweet summer child 🙂
Jon Bois disagrees with you and is prepared to show -excactly how bad- the Browns really are: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_gZndxEvFNk&t=8s
I think there’s about a coin-flip’s chance that Joe is going to Dan it up by having to talk about his feelings, and be all “I’m trying to respect women more, but you seem into this, so that makes it okay, right? Let’s set some boundaries and ground rules,” at which point Malaya will nope out of there in boredom and/or frustration.
Good point
Good thought. Even more direct though: Malaya’s doing this to get a better rating than Sal, so she’ll bring it up.
Browns fans aren’t optimists, they’re sadists.
Based on how they cry rather than smile at the end of every game, I’d say “masochist” is closer.
yea, I am with the Emperor, I would say more masochist than sadist.
I want that to happen, too, so you’re not the only optimist!
OK, I think it’s pretty much confirmed that Malaya is spite-sexual.
Who was she spiting with Ultra Car?
Society?
Yup. Civilization and the whole human race.
Exactly.
“Fuck all humans, I’mma date a car.”
Hm, that could make sense. I thought I had remembered that Malaya was a-spec in the walkyverse, to the extent of only being attracted to ultra car. I mean, I guess Joe could have been one the people she was sexually attracted to in this universe, but I had been leaning on the idea that she doesn’t yet know she is ace and is essentially following a script.
Her being spite sexual could make sense. Though I do think that there is a considerable chance she hasn’t realised that yet. (I didn’t know I was a-spec when I was 18, and while ace awareness is rising, still wouldn’t be a surprise if she hasn’t figured out she is a spec)
Now, this is where I’ll probably come in and look rather rude…
I think that in Shortpacked, Malaya was slightly spite-sexual (she seemed to try and hook up with Leslie mainly to piss off Robin), but otherwise seemed pretty ace. But looking at her interactions with Ultra-Car, where she is so very, very turned on; it seems to me like she was sexual or at least demi; it was just that she was attracted to sentient humanoid-shaped robots, and there weren’t really anyone of those around for a while. So you know, it was practically indistinguishable from being ace until Ultra-Car came around.
I don’t know, does this even make sense?
I have to admit that I have only read short portions of Shortpacked. But I thought her trying to hook up with Leslie was her having realised she wasn’t into guys and that she sort of assumed that meant she was into girls, but then she wasn’t.
I thought she was demisexua or greysexual (both of which are aspec) .. greysexual I think having to do with a specific set of conditions that have to be met before being sexual. If she had a romantic relationship with ultracar before sexual feelings developed, could involve demisexuality, spiting people would be a type of greysexual ..
Was she Aro spec as well? I should read more Shortpacked.
It was a crossover so it might not count but she was going to (or maybe did) hook up with the male main character from that Megaplex webcomic after they bonded over mocking popular films.
She was really into it until he started talking about anime.
So still spite-sexual but even in shortpacked she’s more pan than lesbian.
She also had sex with that guy from Multiplex because she got so turned on by him being such an asshole.
Way to fail, Joe. Canceling your apology tour AND dumping your responsibility on someone else.
Oh well, maybe there’s Carcie to look forward to?
Joe fails better than most of us win.
Wait what should he apologize for? I mean before this.
His “do” list.
Joe, how about we don’t do this? You were making such nice progress. Slowly, but still progress!
You better regret this in the morning >:T
Dammit both of you!
Whelp, now I can only imagine Joe sounding like……Joe, from Family Guy.
SO MANY ships are crashing right now. Massive shipwreck. :<
But a new ship has set sail????
SS JoJo
SS Mal-a-Mar
SS CarMal
No point in naming the “new” one, cause it’s doomed.
Every ship is doomed.
But the best wrecks need names for us to remember them by.
The SS Fayze is definitely doomed.
The SS Moe is an inflatable rubberboat.
Yeah and it’s the Mobro 4000.
That’s some heavy quiet rocks just fell on Marcie. Who cannot scream.
” I have no mouth and I must scream.”
Wait a minute he’s leaving Faz alone with Joyce !? That’s bad for so many reasons !
Could be worse. Joyce has demonstrated Faz-wrangling abilities and Faz has demonstrated willingness-to-be-Joyce-wrangled attributes.
Creatures like him adapt.
Joyce has a couple minutes to figure out a plan before Faz bolts. Being in such close proximity to two college age women simultaneously must have stunned him.
Let’s look at the bright side. She will contain him so he won’t have the chance to annoy too many other people, she won’t tolerate his bullshit, and there is still a chance she might send the little creep to Abu Dhabi.
Oh man. I’m so ready for Marcie to fall on Joe like a tidal wave of fists in a jealous rage.
I hope not. Malaya’s the problem in this interaction.
Uh…. Marcie never made her intentions clear to Malaya who has absolutely no cause to expect her to be jealous? I mean, Malaya’s being an abusive jerk to Sal and is just obnoxious overall, but this, right here? She’s guilty of nothing here except bad taste. (And maybe attemptitude jerkitude towards Sal and very much missing that mark.)
Bad taste ? Well yeah that is bound to happen when you select potential partners around “I want to hit that.”
You mean, as Marcie selected Malaya?
In either case it would make Marcie look like a dick. Remember, she’s not actually in a relationship with Malaya nor did she ever make her intent clear to the latter.
There’s this page where Malaya talks about Marcie having no ulterior motives while the latter is literally checking out her butt while Malaya’s not looking at her.
So yeah, wailing on anybody just because they didn’t magically pick up on something you intentionally hid from them? Not a nice thing to do.
“So yeah, wailing on anybody just because they didn’t magically pick up on something you intentionally hid from them? Not a nice thing to do.”
Which is why it’s so ironic that this is the MO of self-proclaimed Nice Guys™.
“Which is why it’s so ironic that this is the MO of self-proclaimed Nice Guys™.”
No wonder it seemed so familiar. :/
I just want it to happen because of entertainment.
But, isn’t, you know, the difference between people reacting to moves you make to get closer to them (like Marcie snuggling up to Malya when she was reading in bed) and people not reacting to it all the difference between making your interest clear in a polite way and being turned down in an equally polite way?
If they are also into you, they notice and respond, if not, not.
How many people you have dated have stated in so many words that they are interested?
I’m a lady who prefers nerds. I always state everything super clearly, and I highly recommend it!
My current romantic relationship, I typed: “Would you like to go to Coney Island this Saturday? I am totally asking you out!”
> “Would you like to go to Coney Island this Saturday? I am totally asking you out!”
It’s taken me a while to realize it, but this is the level of communication i need in a relationship. “Flirting” has always seemed to be simple but annoying ‘why are you even asking me that question’ questions and “double entendres” are just a sign of poor communication skills. Be clear, dammit!
Yeah, but if you’re relying on such clues, which is a totally acceptable way to go, you have to accept it when you don’t get the signals you’re looking for. Or proceed to the direct ask.
Just continuing to try the subtle signals and pretending there’s something there when there isn’t ain’t cool.
True, if you stick to subtle innuendo and get no response, you should read the subtle “no”. And when unsure, find a way to ask, but don’t pile on more subtle innuendo.
Good, this Marcie Malaya farce was getting on my nerves.
You say that as if the train wreck were anywhere near over.
WHy doesn’t the hovertext work on mobile?
Are you on a boat and low on battery?
Hovertexts don’t work on water! (Unless you’ve got power!)
….
*flees for dear 2015-referencing life*
Works for me – it says, ”Joe and Malaya perform a sure-why-not”, if it helps.
It does. Just press on the empty space left or right of the navigation buttons. Press once more to get out of it
Because of SCIENCE!!!!!
(Sorry, feeling silly today)
Ehh…
…
…
…
…
What’s the difference?
Two or three exclamation points, generally.
“Five exclamation marks, the sure sign of an insane mind.”
“They called me mad! MAD!! ME!!! MAAAAAAD!!!! MOAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!”
“Everyone who works in there goes mad. Maaaad.”
(My favorite Terry Pratchett quote, paraphrased)
Mad! MAD!!!
Sure, I’m mad, but I’ve got tenure! Bwahaha!!!
I’m not sure if I would fault Joe on this one, he was propositioned to by someone who is clearly interested he never even talked to before
I mean, I could fault his taste and his lack of “wtf am I getting into” caution, but overall, no, can’t fault him.
…. trying to decide whether he should be faulted for ditching Faz. On the one hand, minor he’s semi-responsible for. On the other hand, Faz.
Amber is maybe semi-responsible for Faz. Joe has no real connection to the guy except proximity.
Proximity that he agreed to. He did give his word to Amber that he’d watch him, so that implies taking on semi-responsibility.
Oh, did he? I was remembering it as him helping look for a runaway Faz, which I think could be reasonably construed as not open-ended (it’s daytime, Faz is 15 or 17, we’re not talking about a missing toddler). If he made a promise to keep ‘custody’, dubious as that is, then breaking that is a bigger jerk move, agreed.
Excepting that he volunteered to watch him. He told amber and danny that he would watch faz.
He was the person currently tasked with looking out for faz. I mean, granted, 15 year olds don’t normally have a babysitter in the middle of the day, so this is more joe letting amber and joyce down (Joyce agreed to help, not to watch him on her own), rather than putting faz in danger.
The only danger Faz is in results from him being obnoxiously annoying to women. So I thought keeping an eye on Faz served to keep Faz out of women’s dorm rooms (not because of keeping Faz safe but because of keeping him from being obnoxious to women).
Very true. I was just trying to say that his responsibility stemmed less from faz being a minor and more towards the fact that he told amber he would look after him.
I think we are essentially in agreement?
Yes, seems like I misunderstood your comment.
Well, I suspect Amber’s concern lies in Faz’s behavior getting the authorities involved and thus getting him in trouble with Blaine, which she wouldn’t wish even on Faz.
She hinted as much in one of the strips right after he showed up.
God dammit, Joe.
Oh Malaya…. I couldn’t hate you more. Hot? Debate-able Good for Carla for getting some sense.
Marcie just wails on Joe on the front door stair way and Sals the one who hast to hold her back for once. And as Sal draggs her away they Leave Malaya a confused mess and Joe a beaten up even more confused mess. All while at the same time they’re both thinking, “The hells her deal ?”
You’re right I want to see it too.
I was trying to reply to K.Ivan ruppert.
oh i guess nothings getting happening actually. Thanks Malaya.
Fuckin hell the conniptions are real
Gosh i actually am kinda glad that carla lost interest in malaya.
I’m still not sure what Carla was up to. I doubt that’s over.
You got you some, Malaya? GOOD FOR YOU. HIGH FIVE.
Heh, I hope she will to to coax Joe into putting the list online again and give her a ten, just to spite Sal. That would be a perfectly petty thing to do.
Given her phrasing… I also can’t help but wonder if part of her motivation might not be to get back to MARY by beating her in her own game.
http://www.dumbingofage.com/2017/comic/book-7/04-the-do-list/plottwist/
Okay if that’s the case then I approve a little more, but not of Joe getting used for that.
Best outcome? Malaya asks Joe what her rating is (because that’s the whole point of this interlude for her) and Joe explains why rating women is wrong.
At which point Malaya either 1)loses her shit at him, or 2)experiences some personal growth.
Yeah i know, but we can hope.
I think JOE will experience some personal growth. Heheheheh…
Sorry.
Aren’t we all glad Faz is left with Joyce so he can get some proper guidance?
“Faz yearns to learn what an ‘hanky panky’ is.”
“ALL RIGHT, just so you can avoid it until you are married. When a man and a woman loves each other very much (I still haven’t figured out the other combinations so don’t ask) he takes his thing and he rubs her tummy…”
“Faz is learning so much right now.”
… Yes. Yeeeessss please make this happen. 8D
Dammit Joe you’re supposed to watch Faz, not dump him on someone else. Dammit Malaya you have to worst standards ever.
I dunno about that. Mary and her main squeeze are probably worse.
No, Leslie beats her. By a long shot.
Pretty appropriate gravatar of Mindy xD
It’s not like Malaya went for Faz…
Fingers crossed for Marcie & Sal conversation time!
Meanwhile, inside Carla’s brain:
The most memeable song of this generation.
For PC users.
Pretty sure Carla did in fact write that song.
God damn it Joe.
No wait, GOD DAMN IT MALAYA.
Why not both?
yeah.
Because Malaya isn’t doing anything wrong from her perspective. Except to the extent that part of her motivation is that she thinks Sal is secretly interested in Joe because she’s acting not interested and she assumes everything Sal says is the opposite of what she really feels, but even then it’s not like they’re in a relationship so it’s a pretty small level of spite in the grand scheme of things, less than they normally exhibit to each other in every conversation tbh.
Joe I think gets a lot of undeserved grief from the comments section- like I think the whole List plot has been really over-hyped by fans and for that matter the comic itself- but here he’s actually being kind of shitty by bailing on Joyce not just in the middle of an important Feelings conversation, but especially by dumping Faz on her after promising to look after him. I do *understand* why he’s panicking and running away, but it’s still a shitty thing to do.
Getting with someone purely for the sake of hurting someone you think is interested in them is a cruel and petty thing to do.
My position:
*) There is no deep reason for Joe to swear off sex. There’s maybe good reason for him to put hitting on women on hiatus until he examines his attitudes, but that doesn’t apply here.
*) He’s walking away from a serious conversation that he started, not Joyce; he’s not abandoning a cry for help. It’s a bit rude, but opportunity knocks.
*) Faz is too bizarre a character to reason about realistically. But “stepbrother of my future stepsister, who will never be part of my actual family” is pretty low-obligation.
If anyone’s being a jerk here, it’s Malaya, for snagging Joe for the purpose of messing with Sal. Then again, she may find Joe genuinely hot, and he’s infamously single. So…
He promised amber that he would keep an eye on faz. He volunteered for it, he actually had to convince amber of it.
So yes, joe is dropping an obligation he has to amber.
Yeah, I’ve been corrected on that point.
I still stand by the other points. Agreeing to have sex with Malaya is not ‘backsliding’.
Yeah, Joe’s problem was objectifying women and treating them like sex tools. Malaya openly and actively sought him out so that doesn’t apply here.
Totally agree.
Too many people seem to be actively looking for ways to *fail* Joe…
Well, Joe seems to think he’s backsliding. “Lasted longer than I expected to.”
I agree that this wouldn’t normally be bad – other than dumping Faz on Joyce and Malaya’s screwed up motivations, but if he does see it as backsliding he’s likely to take it as a confirmation he can’t be any better and go back to something like his old ways.
Wouldn’t you say he has an obligation to see through the serious conversation *he* started to the end, though, rather than bailing on it the instant it seems to turn in a direction that’s not wholly convenient for him? Like sure, there’s no reason for him to swear off sex, but accepting a proposition under these circumstances isn’t exactly a good look for him from anyone else’s perspective.
Eh, I view obligations as situational, not absolute. Like when the apparent costs change. Anyway, is he obliged to continue a conversation that’s not comfortable for him?
“Faz is too bizarre a character to reason about realistically.” That’s well put.
Faz seems to be a grotesque parody, but I can’t even figure out what he’s a grotesque parody of.
Dunning Kruger syndrome.
I’m still more disappointed in Joyce than Joe. At least Joe’s knows he’s falling off the wagon. Joyce is being told she’s getting pushed onto the tracks and doesn’t believe it.
I’m not sure if you can really call Joe’s actions here a relapse. I mean, Malaya basically walked up to him and said: “I want to have sex with you and I suspect that you want sex with me.” For someone like Joe, that’s pretty much a brain-bypass.
That said, I’m hoping that there are nasty consequences for both principals in this little display.
Joe seems to believe he’s backsliding here – “Wow, I lasted longer than I expected to”
I don’t think Joyce thinks Joe’s making up the Sarah thing. Like, she seemed incredulous at first, but her asking Joe about his honest appraisal of her would imply to me that she thinks he’s in fact telling the truth, or at the least, the truth as he understands it. She’s definitely not outright dismissing it.
Yes Joe, let the hate flow. Embrace the hot side of the force.
In which Joe fails quietly, but at least understands what real consent looks like.
Well put.
God damn it, Joe.
God damn it, Malaya.
God damn its for everyone, on the house.
Damnit.
And the thought occurs, was Malaya in the bi-appreciation day character post?
No.
So probably not canonically Bi, unless not introduced by that point. I can’t find the chart, and google isn’t helping.
Knowing to tread lightly on this topic, that was an in-joke based on the Walkyverse, where after Ruth’s death Billie starts dating Danny. At that time it wasn’t known that Danny was bi, so his presence was a sneaky little joke by Willis, since he knew it would be seen as just an illustration of Billie’s bisexuality. Unless we’re thinking of different things.
Willis did a chart/graphic of all the characters who were bi in canon, because Mr. Willis himself is bi. Malaya is (sorta) bi in the Walkyverse, but I haven’t seen what her canon orientation is in the Dumbiverse. I’m hoping she’s bi so Marcie doesn’t get her heart broken any more.
“Let’s make everyone else hate us more” probably transcends bisexuality
Sexuality transfers over from the Walkyverse, and she dated two women in Shortpacked. So she’s probably into women in some regard. The question is if she’s interested in the women who are interested in her.
I give it…
3 comics before Joe stops and realizes why this is a mistake.
Tbh I ain’t pleased I’m still gay for malaya
In some ways, Joe was under pretty unprecedented pressure here. I think that Malaya couldn’t have done a better job of pushing his buttons if she’d tried!
Meanwhile… Well, Carla is out (who can blame her) and I think that Sal and Marcie have a long, hard conversation ahead of them.
D*MN IT JOE GET YOUR ASS BACK THERE
Literally.
“Watch Joe literally kick himself in the ass” the musical.
SO CLOSE TO GROWTH, JOE. So close to FEELS.
I
I mean I get why he does it to himself. But literally it was that “I have a more toxic attitude to fuck buddies than I care to admit because I have unresolved issues of emotional processing,” that got him into so much shit. I get it, but dude. YOU WERE SO CLOSE TO LEARNING.
I should be feeling for Joyce the most, that was some intense emotion/ emoting in the last strip.
But the one I really feel for is Carla. Sorry, girl.
Oh, Marice isn’t going to like this either. Which, Sal.
Okay fuck. Maybe it isn’t just Joe.
I mean, I realize as I talk to myself that this strip isn’t called “Everyone makes informed, healthy, decisions all the time.”
But is it because I’m mad at them that I’m holding them to a higher standard? Do I assume they should know better? Or is this me being mad at my OWN bad decisions? Hmm.
Fuck off Joe you were close. DID YOU SEE JOYCE’S PUPPY DOG EYES? YOUR OWN? FUCK OFF, JOE
i doubt this is the end. When making big life changes youre bound to fall into old habits before youre better.
e.g. You dont usually break an addiction on the first attempt to quit. Most people give in, but it’s a process. Simply trying to quit is a sign. It’s kinda like that. He’s falling into old habits since Malaya is the only girl who actually wants to have sex with him atm (and i think Joe might actually be a sex addict)
To be completely fair Joe didn’t exactly Fall back into old habits. His problem was objectifying women and treating them as nothing more than sex tools. He doesn’t need to swear off sex, he just needs to start treating women like actual people, not cardboard cut-outs with a hole at crotch level, sorry for my crudeness.
Yeah, he didn’t wrong Roz, and he’s wronging Malaya even less, given she knows about the list, and is the one making the move even with this knowledge. She’s doing it to spite Sal, seemingly, but then again, Joe’s canonically considered a pretty good looking dude, so maybe she’s just down for some casual sex.
It can be both. Malaya can have multiple reasons to do things.
“The lips which touched Joe’s will not touch ours”
And I think Marcie is having a reboot sequence right now…
Somehow Sal over there makes me think “Damn, is this what Malaya does when she thinks I don’t care about something? I need to care even less about stuff, that way she’ll make an ass out of herself more often”
My first instinct is to assume that Joyce will simply sit idly with Faz around, watching Joe and Malaya walk of.
But honestly, I personally would love for Joyce to snap out of her disappointment in Joe, and simply drag Faz after them, dumping Faz onto him.
I mean, it’s not as if they literally “ran” of – they are in walking distance!
“We’re angels, walking among garbage people.”
They could look at Mary and her Boyfriend and it would be like looking in the mirror…
But Mary and What’s-His-Name aren’t two kids in a beautiful non-binary trenchcoat.
What?
Also your avatar… Malaya! Stop looking so pretty! Stop disguising the fact that you are a piece of shit!
You just hate her because she’s hot 😉
I loath hot weather, that might be that. Pour cold water on her!
[Singsong tone] You think she’s preeretty~ You wanna slow-dance with her at night with one of those spinning light ball things throwing little circles of light onto her freckly fasaace~ I’m not projecting at aaaall~
There’s a fucking typo in this, and I’m honestly losing my goddamn mind over it.
Yeah?
It read preretty well to me…
>:)
“A” typo? Singular?
(I’m evil.)
Shit, fuck, it’s all in the mind.
Oh yeah I want to slow dance with her on the balcony, slowly moving towards the edge before throwing her over it into the trash container that’s a meter or two below.
I got that reference!
And Malaya is such a Kevin right now.
me too 🙂 I was actually planning to say something about her reminding me of Kevin. been too busy to even read half the comments lately
Goddamnit Joe
You could AT THE VERY LEAST tell Joyce that you rather stop there
But no, just leave her hanging (AND leave Faz with her)
What was that sound of glass breaking? I do think that was Marcie’s heart. Poor Carla’s heart is likely too calloused and abused because of the life she’s had which, in its own way, is even more tragic.
Tbh as a lesbian it’s something you just have to expect, sometimes a girl is just not into you.
That had nothing to do with being a lesbian. Everyone will sometime meet a person they are into who is not into them. Happens to straight cis guys all the time, but some of them make a point of being all angry about it.
Hm,
Wait , this might make total sense for Maylaya Motivations.
She isnt clueless at all how other women feel about the list.
She gets to be the woman who breaks the Joe -Boycott and ruins it for the sisterhood. She wants to be Notorious, like Joe.
OH!
( i mistakenly thought she was just spiteing Sal. Nope! )
I really cant fault Malaya ( I mean I can but … ) .
She is Hot here , just like she said. . So is Joe. Her confidence is sexy. she knows what she wants and goes for it.
Oddly marcie just learned she was ( maybe ) trying to seduce Maylaya the wrong way.
I strongly believe in that reading of her.
I mean, I ALSO think she is trying to spite Sal (by making sure to get a 10), but it’s not only that.
MArcie is gonna murder Joe.
I think that she’s going to want to find a corner to hide in first and get her emotions under control.
No complaining, Joyce. Friends help friends getting boyfriends, right?
http://www.dumbingofage.com/2017/comic/book-8/01-face-the-strange/newfriends/
Or… something like that.
Right? No takebacks on your friendship speech.
http://www.dumbingofage.com/2013/comic/book-4/01-the-only-dope-for-me-is-you/dna/
Joyce looks so funny to me in this strip. Her expressions seems overly dramatic. Plus her dialogue is just two people’s names. But I get it; she’s just kind of speechless. I don’t ship Joe and Joyce, so what’s awful about Joe’s behaviour here for me is LEAVING HER ALONE WITH FAZ THE LITTLE CREEP-ASS.
Joyce yells, ”SAL, HEEEEEELLLLP” as she grips Faz tightly. But then Faz wriggles out of his jacket which Joyce was gripping. And then Sal and Joyce have to do another high speed motorcycle chase!!!
So Joe gets a consensual hookup while Joyce considers that she might be beautiful enough to destroy a happy relationship.
Wait, why is Joe the bad guy here?
He left her with Faz, mostly. The same Faz he gave his word he’d keep an eye on.
Yeah, the Faz dump is the problem here, along with ditching Joyce when she is trying to get him to open up.
There’s also the matter of leaving her alone in public, but he doesn’t know the extent of her Ryan baggage as far as I know.
He isn’t really, but he is abandoning Faz, aka his promise to his new maybesister Amber.
I literally do not understand Malaya’s character. At all.
She just enjoys being an asshole, especially to Sal whom she particularly dislikes. She thought Sal liked Joe because she was talking to him(i think?) so she saw hooking up with Joe as an opportunity to one-up Sal.
Who, I assume, doesn’t give a shit.
What’s confusing? She’s hot, he’s hot, and they’ll be hated together.
Joe’s hand went straight to the right boob. They’re going to fuck for hours like rabbits. Joe has a lot of ground to recover from the past dry days. Well, it was to be expected that he cannot hold out for long once he gets an opportunity.
If boobs are on offer, who in Joe’s place would refuse?
He put his arm around her.
Let’s, uh, hope he doesn’t regret this.
I hope he does.
I’m pretty sure any attempt to spend time with Malaya immediately after the sex will be something he’d regret now, and would probably regret pre-list exposure, on account of it will be Malayla being Malayla.
I feel sorry for marcie the most if they go through with this..
Honestly Marcie might have been done a favor here. She’s just got a big hard-to-ignore “this is who Malaya is” message. That might be helpful in the long run.
Better a broken heart now than waiting for the crush chemicals to wear off and seeing the mess you got yourself into.
Honestly there is an astounding amount of nice guy logic floating around the comments here with regard to Malaya.
First of all, Marcie has never told Malaya she has a crush on her. Malaya is clearly quite oblivious to this (as evidenced in her “Marcie’s always been straight with me” comic/gag.)
Secondly, Malaya views Marcie as a friend and thinks that they’re just friends. If Marcie views this friendship as just a way to get in Malaya’s pants then she’s the one being a shitty manipulative person.
Thirdly Malaya is entitled to fuck whoever she wants, she doesn’t owe Malaya anything even if she did know about her crush.
Yeah, only thing Malaya could be said to be doing bad with respect to Marcie is that Marcie asked her to be nicer to Sal, and spitefucking a dude to slight her isn’t really doing that. Then again, Malaya might just want to bone Joe, anyway. She did call him hot, and Joe’s generally presented as one of the best looking guys in the school (Jacob is his own tier, followed by Joe and Ethan).
I mean kind of, but she also actually talked to Sal about it in what, for Malaya, amounts to a friendly way, or at least friendly rival way. This was more a, “Ah, you’re trying to play hard to get, aren’t ya. Let me show you the RIGHT way to get in List Guy’s pants.” Like she’s not going behind Sal’s back at all (disregarding that Sal actually just doesn’t care about Joe.)
So there’s some amount of wanting to show Sal up but it’s a lot less malicious than people are acting like.
A) Just because Malaya thinks it’s not malicious or shitty doesn’t mean it’s actually not.
B) While you are correct that Malaya doesn’t know Marcie likes her and wouldn’t be obligated to date her even if she did, people are still allowed to feel sorry for Marcie knowing her crush won’t be reciprocated – she’s not done anything shitty yet (especially since it seems like she DOES enjoy hanging out with Malaya aside from wanting to bang her).
I wonder how disappointed Marcie will be. I’m sort of afraid Marcie will be really upset. Sal will then be mad at Malaya, leading to Malaya to think she got under Sal’s skin. Then maybe Sal will blow up on Malaya and out Marcie’s secret crush. That would probably be bad for everyone involved. I shall hope that Marcie isn’t devastated by this
So many subroutines running in the background, using up memory…
When is Dorothy going to wake up and realize she 1) she overslept, and 2) she may have had unprotected sex? (A possibility given the haste and mental dishevelment)
Why is Faz here? WTF has Blaine done now?
Joyce is going to circle back around to “Sarah wants you to be with Jacob” and confront Sarah.
Joyce is incredulous at Joe’s departure. But she’ll dream about Jacob tonight.
And maybe, hopefully, Marcie will turn to Sal and they’ll work things out. They are real friends and it’s just wrong for them to be apart like that.
Malaya? I got nothin’.
2) Please, if one of them didn’t turn the key at the right time, the whole process would have shut down.
I think that Walky understands how important it is to Dorothy that sex is very protected, and even if she was too tired to make sure all protections were in place I think Walky would make sure that they were. Though I guess if Dorothy was actively telling him that the protection didn’t matter… but even then.
..
I mean that could even be why Dorothy had substainlly more clothes on than him. She could have decided that the easiest way to protect herself was to not involve her genitals. Or for them to switch off in ways that would minimise risk. I definitely sometimes was like we are not going to have our underwear off at the same time because I was terrified of getting pregnant.
I hope so. And it would be a big point in Walky’s favor if he remembers even if (I give twenty percent chance) she did not.
I’d assume given the earlier line about her protocols, that she’s using some kind of long term contraception, the pill or an iud or some such, in addition to condoms. So a lapse here would be unlikely to have serious consequences.
And I’d assume Walky would remember.
And I’d assume we’re not going to have a pregnancy scare storyline. (Certainly not an actual pregnancy one. It would be years before she could even know she was pregnant.
Okay, I just realized that Joe’s being a little jerky by abandoning Joyce out in the open when she’s got her phobia. But… she still ran out here on her own and can quite easily get back to the dorms.
Besides, she’s not alone. She’s got Faz with her.
…
Oh dear.
Oh, Jalaya, for you it’s the Bloodhound Gang’s Bad Touch. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xat1GVnl8-k
Marcie, Marcie, Marcie, please Stop Chasing Rainbows!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MaK6Ytri26s
“Joe and Malaya preform a sure-why-not” Thank you Willis hahahaha
Poor Marcie 🙁
Joe’s shooting down the glimmer of a chance that he just had with Joyce. I wonder if he’s obtuse? Or if he thinks he doesn’t deserve Joyce and he’s sinking his ship on purpose
He knows that if he dated Joyce he’d hurt her, just like his father hurt his mom. He’d been made to realize that even his emotion-free ways were still hurting people, but that didn’t make him think he’d be safe in an actual relationship.
Slightly off topic, but I was just listening to Professor Stephen Pinker (Harvard) talk on the radio about his new book “Enlightenment Now”. He is very proud of the 75 graphs and charts it contains.
I see the relevance, however, I have to note I’d be proud of having 75 graphs as well, because that means those have not only be designed but also discussed and that is a heck load of work, including the transformation of information into a comprehensible graph itself.
Actually, yes. It’s amusing in the context of DoA, but to be fair to Prof. Pinker, it’s a good and useful book, very relevant to our troubled times.
Is it more succinct and readable than The Better Angels of Our Nature? I had to slog through that book. Does it address the lead and crime hypothesis? I found Pinker’s explanation of the rise and fall of crime between the Sixties and the Noughties in BAoON unsatisfactory. Has Pinker connected the violent culture of the South, African-Americans, and the poor in America with bad policing yet? I thought that was obvious from his sources, but he wittered on about Antebellum culture and getting democracy before freedom.
Alright people are hating on Joe here a lot, but I’ll defend him a tiny bit even if he is making the wrong choice here. He’s only recently been trying to break his old bad habits, and old habits die hard, and some random hot chick is walking up to him and basically offering him free sex. (GOD DAMN IT MALAYA)
Now obviously actually taking her up on this right now is a terrible choice, but being fair, he hasn’t gone cold turkey for long enough to make the right choice here. What will determine whether this is him being an asshole or just relapsing into bad habits will be how he comports himself AFTER this.
And lots of people have also defended Joe on that. All context aside, there’s no real issue with Joe hooking up with Malaya. Her motivations are all screwed up, but that’s not Joe’s fault.
Dumping Faz on Joyce is his fault. That he sees this as falling off the wagon is a problem, since it makes it more likely he’ll drop back into his old self. That he’s just walking off on a deep conversation with Joyce might be understandable, but it’s still a jerk move.
And I suspect the true crux of this hasn’t hit yet. It’s not afterwards that we’ll see, it’s when he finds out that Malaya’s throwing herself at him BECAUSE of the list and his old reputation. That’s going to be a challenge.
I wonder if Malaya likes Taylor Swift…
I’ve forgotten. Has anyone actually contacted Faz’s legal guardians? Or has he just been repeatedly dumped on other people?
No, Amber did not. Likely because she didn’t want even Faz to get into trouble with Blaine.
And this is the first time he’s been dumped on anyone. Joe volunteered, thinking he was helping Amber and Danny hookup.
Amber mentioned something of not having been able to reach his mother.
Ah joe joe.
Joe is dumb and Malaya is evil. Is it a pattern that Joe only has sex with evil women like Robin’s sister, Penny and Malaya? Those women are assholes and desperate for sex.
Wait now Roz is evil? And Malaya is evil? And Penny is evil?
Being an asshole /=/ being evil. Also Malaya is 18 and Penny is in her early 20s, of course they want to get laid. And for some reason no value judgement on Joe wanting to get laid, just the “evil” ladies.
Being oblivious to Marcie’s crush on her doesn’t make Malaya evil. Going for it when a super hot woman throws herself at you means that Joe is a normal 18 year old, not that he’s an idiot (in fact I’d argue that turning that Malaya down would make him an idiot). Even if he knew that Malaya was “evil” (which he doesn’t, and also which she isn’t) he’s still 18 and would have a hell of a time not giving in to the temptation.
“I assume everyone hates me for being better than them and I’m fine with that. I also assume you feel the same way.” Nope, no warning signs there whatsoever.
Okay, they aren’t evil, but they are jerks. Penny accused Jason without evidence and for fun (yes, he did the act, but she didn’t knew), and even told him that she can get away with things because she is popular; Roz is a manipulative bastard and an hypocrite that uses liberal ideas as an excuse for her selfishness (even Leslie told her to shut up); and Malaya can be considered just an annoying person that doesn’t wnat to make peace just because she has the same fake bravado as Sal.
Nah, Malaya is defs evil. She’s just a petty, everyday kind of evil like internet trolls or people who smoke in bus shelters.
Evil is far too strong, especially for Roz. What did she even do wrong aside from having strong political opinions.
Desperate for sex? They wanted to hook up. That part has never been the problem.
The issue for Penny was that besides being an ass she hooked up with a student which was unethical.
Evil is too strong indeed but Roz was kinda manipulative. The only reason she had sex with Joe and then published that tape was to get back at her family, try to ruin their reputation and all that. Also the whole thing Could have hurt Joe.
IIRC, Joe agreed to that tape, and furthermore there have been Slipshines published since then showing that Joe and Roz wasn’t just a one-time hookup.
Okay this is just hilarious. I’ve always laughed at the irony of the uber-feminist having sex with the most chauvinistic duchebro in the entire cast but this, this is absolute peak of comedy XD
IIRC, she says something like “I can always go back to him, cause he’s always willing. And as long as he shuts up, it’s not bad. He’s got stamina.”
That’s actually kind of sad that she has to resort to… Joe.
Maybe he’s a good fuck.
To quote: “Joe’s technique is okay, but his best quality is his stamina.”
And “Sometimes, if I can’t line up anybody else, I know he’s always available for more.”
I was misremembering the bit about shuts up. 🙁
joe nooo
JOE YES
(Full disclosure I’ve thought Malaya was a total babe since she first appeared in Shortpacked!)
Marcie probably has the most dumbfounded face in history right now… I would be wondering “just what the hell just happened” too, to be honest
I’m not even gonna judge, you do you…and her…and him…however this works
You go Malaya! You Joe Joe!
Joe promised to help Amber, Joyce volunteered to help, and now he’s leaving her to do the whole thing. Why isn’t that something to judge?
Okay, I have to ask, at this point only four (well five if you count Faz), will know Joe and Malaya hooked up, how is that going to translate into everyone hating them more? Are they going to have sex on the front lawn?
Also, does this mean I will need to renew my Slipshine account?
Well if they’re not having sex on the front lawn then presumably they’re going back to someone’s dorm room and more people will see them along the way. I mean. I don’t think it’s unreasonable to assume word of sex happenings will get around, that tends to be how gossip mills work.
Way to just leave Joyce in the lurch when you literally KNOW she’s still nervous about being outside by herself. :/
Having Faz with her does not even count, he actually actively makes this WORSE than being by herself.
Where is everyone getting this from? She was alone before the caugth Faz, outside.
No. She caught him here, inside the hall. Last time we saw her before that she was waiting outside Dorothy’s room with plastic spoons.
She’s been better at venturing out alone, but she’s still not real comfortable with it.
disappointedbutnotsurprised.jpg
I like Malaya. She has roughly my level of not giving a fuck about peer pressure and focus on thing she wants.
You can not give a fuck about peer pressure without being an insufferable asshole towards everyone you come in contact with.
But the thing she wants is to show that she’s better than Sal, who really doesn’t give a fuck about peer pressure.
Joe’s current theme, IMO.
Did Malaya ensnare Joe’s interest without a butt shot?
TBH I kinda hate myself for finding panel 2 Malaya completely adorable.
Me too. Where has she been “hiding” that part of her–not her appearance, but her pleasant, appealing, even beguiling, demeanor?
Malaya seems to be operating under the delusion that she is hated because people are jealous of her hotness. So being hated is proof that she’s hot!
(people are also jealous of her for being totally not fake. and owning Fuckface.)
As a long-time defender of Joe I can’t really blame him for going and getting some except that he promised he’d look after Faz
Thats a major dick move on Joes part and the actions of a boy not man
… Well.
On the bright side, at least that seems to have cured both Carla and Marcie of their unhealthy interest/obsession with Malaya. 😛
JOE FOR FUCKS SAKE GOD DAMIT
Yes, he is doing it for fucks sake.