What? It was just an internet saying? I thought it was a real award. Guess I’ll be putting these back where I found them then (tosses a box of internets behind some nearby bushes).
It reflects pretty well on him that he’s even-handed enough to consider that maybe just because he’s been to dinner with someone doesn’t mean they’ve given him a full and unbiased account of all their interactions.
Exactly. He got to know Sarah before Raidah and they got along fine. Breaking off all contact with Sarah because a girl he’s went out with a handful of times said she was a terrible person isn’t a very smart train of thought for someone going to school to become a lawyer. Now if they had been together a year and he had not met Sarah before, things would be different, but that’s not the case.
He probably figures there’s more than what Raidah is telling him. It isn’t a simple a “Sarah is a jerk who punched me” and their interaction he saw in Sarah’s room kinda sold that.
Jacob’s recognized that a lot of Sarah’s worst moments come from trying to box out affection to the point where she told Jacob that he didn’t want to be friends with her, something she’s trying to overcome here.
If all he knew about Sarah was that she was the bongo who punched his girlfriend in the face then yes, it would be weird, but he has an established relationship with her.
Actually it reflects pretty well that he doesn’t instantly believe he has the whole story because he seems aware that Raidah’s version of events is biased by her dislike of Sarah and lacks the full context. And he WAS friends with Sarah first so while he might not blame Raidah for her bias, he is probably quite aware that anything she says about Sarah is stained in it to make him dislike her.
To be fair, Raidah only said that Sarah was toxic for her, not that Jacob couldn’t talk to her or that other people couldn’t have healthy interactions with her. Which is actually a growth from where she was considering she harassed Sarah for a year over the idea that Sarah was toxic to everyone and must be isolated and hurt because of it:
Even though we know that Sarah is in the right, here, I’ve seen waaaaay too many incidences of “BF hangs out with girl who has crush on him, swears up and down it’s innocent even though GF is uncomfortable, is eventually tempted to do something heartbreaking.”
Here’s hoping at least that he will put a stop to it if Sarah becomes openly disrespectful of his and Raidah’s relationship, or that he will do right by Raidah and leave her first instead of going for a side piece.
Has anything about Jacob indicated that he’d do so? Also I hate cheating storylines so I’d be okay if they never happened because they are very, very rarely written well.
He might as well carry a business card wearing “hi I like hand holding and long chats about feelings.”
Oh no. That’s Sarah 2.0.0.1, but I can see the mistake. They have talked about her being more user friendly in the next update, but that just means she will be less likely to physically assault people who are not currently attempting to harm her or any human labeled as “friend” or “tolerable associate”.
Yup. Half the time she’s around NPC:Jacob, she freezes, glitches, or says dialog unrelated to the current mission. I’ve also seen her somehow react to him like an enemy and run away even though she is a warrior and her battle confidence is higher than 0.
Me too. Her progress seems slow, but she’s been changing over less than two months which is a normal and frankly impressive pace. I’ve seen people improve less in a year than she has so far with a lot of it thanks to developing friends who care about her even with all her prickles and bluntness.
It’s due to her friendship with Dina. Dina wades into scary social situations without fear, is honest and open, and people respond well to that. She’s a great role model for a misanthrope like Sarah.
I’m mostly happy because Jacob is a real cool dude who doesn’t judge people based on others’ words, i know way too many people including me fall into that kinda trap sometimes
I judge based on the word of someone who I completely trust and known for years. That list is currently two people. Everyone else I listen with a healthy level of internal skepticism.
Lol! I meant that when it comes to the opinion of others I only trust two people without pause, but as trusting as I can be I might should not trust my own judgment XD
Yeah. I’m not gonna lie, I have biases caused by my upbringing and the town I live in which I am slowly but surely weeding through. Take trans* people for example. When I found out that they were something that existed, I was pretty unnerved. I was in my early 20s to boot. It didn’t help that the people I knew painted a pretty bigoted picture of them. I took people’s word too much back then.
Then there was a person on TV who was identified male at birth, was trans*, and stopped in the middle because they were happy right there. That left me completely confused for so many reasons! How could someone be both male and female and neither at the same time? What pronouns do you use on someone who was a mix match of attributes attributes to males and females? Why stop in the middle instead of picking one? We’re they really trans* or just a fashion choice? The gender binary was all I ever knew and finding out that there was more was the equivalent of seeing someone with naturally green skin and glowing eyes for me. It broke all the rules I knew and I automatically tried to categorize while part of me seen it as unnatural as well as fascinating.
Then there was a documentary on intersex individuals and people who weren’t perfectly binary. I was fascinated. There really were naturally occurring people who weren’t male or female. There were people who were genetically one gender while presenting as another. There were people born that didn’t fit easily in a category and had surgery without their knowledge in the name of gender normalization. Gender was some kind of lie I had been taught. I think the most jarring part was the part about the babies who had surgery without their knowledge as the realization hit that I had a scar where my labia minora should be which my parents had told me was because the doctors said they found a birth defect which had to be fixed.
Then there was a show I watched. It interviewed a transwoman and she was… normal for lack of a better word. She wasn’t any of the things I had been taught, but she had a difficult life because of how people treated her and the law was against her. And I felt like shit because even though I wasn’t someone who sent her death threats or bullied her or tried to take away her rights, I would have looked at her like she was off. I was ashamed and realized I was a bigot, so I decided to stop.
I started doing research. Reading research and personal stories. Watching documentaries. Reading web comics with someone in the cast who wasn’t cis. Gathering data. Learning. And I realized that all those things I had been told when I was younger were misguided at best and terrible bigoted stereotypes that people thought shouldn’t exist at worst. So I changed and became a better person. I threw out all the old information I had in my brain. I embraced being polysexual as I realized that not only was I attracted so some of the people who didn’t fit the binary label, but could see myself dating one of them if the opportunity arose.
Later, I ended up in the hospital and met a gender fluid individual. She (using the pronoun used while there) was trying to figure out who she was and the words for how to explain how she felt while surrounded by people who called her crazy. I ended up being the only person who was kind to her in there. She was use to people being assholes or keeping their distance, but not use to people being kind and friendly. And I felt like an ass all over again because not too long ago I would have thought terribly of this sweet kind energetic person.
I do believe that my personal hell would be your second paragraph. Gods damn compulsion to have a label for everything. I applaud your growth, and which to complete mine, but that has to wait until I deal with the shitstorm of my personal life. Until then, I utilize what may be know as “LA LA LA Not Listening” or something like that.
I don’t want Malibu Sarah with a new hat! I want Sarah sans headwear.
In all seriousness, she has beautiful hair that she has been covering up since the incident with her last roommate. It’s almost like a way for her to hide or a security blanket. I’m happy to see her progress and am looking forward to when she resolves her issues that were caused by last semester’s drama.
Don’t you know by now? Everything is breaking 4th walls because we can obviously only see 3 walls at a time and sometimes characters say things that obviously mean more because they are talking to us and not that other person or themselves because reasons!
You know, I know that Sarah’s only really hoping for a quick trip to Sexytime Town, but I really do hope that these two develop a good friendship. Whatever Sarah tells herself, she does seem to be more open and at ease when talking to Jacob, and while Jacob’s mellow enough to take her misanthropic tendencies in stride, he’s also not afraid to call her out on said tendencies. Hell, maybe he can bring a good third-party perspective to the problems between Raidah and Sarah.
That, and it’s nice to see her realize that she needs to pull herself out of her misanthropy. She doesn’t need to go Full Joyce for people to like her, she can be Sarah and be happy, but there’s a lot wrong about her that’s of her own creation and it’s time she starts to address it.
Also I started therapy yesterday and I’m excited enough about that to want to shout about it (anonymously on the internet).
Only thing wrong with Sarah is that she got crapped on by her entire dorm floor so doing what she thought was right. And I think she did the right thing myself.
People refused to set with her at lunch, study with her, called her names, and Raidah and friends actually assaulted her. So yeah, Sarah said to Hell with this and proceeded to ignore them and immerse herself in her studies.
Until Joyce.
And then Becky.
And she had a huge crush on Jacob before he started going with Raidah. Sarah realized she wasn’t ready for a steady one on one…till she found out he was dating Raidah, and then it was too late.
So maybe, it is and maybe it isn’t. I’m proud of Sarah, she is out there trying. Hey, she walked to class with ‘friends’, she is talking to Jacob, and sitting up front of the class. That’s pretty good progress.
I’m proud of her too. It may have taken years our time, but it has been less than a couple months in her time since Joyce came crashing into her life.
And as a side note, believe me when I say that people only believe what that want to believe. I ODed once after fighting it for a year and nobody believed it had happened and thought it was out of the blue. My best friend called my dad and my then boyfriend who I told (before being taken to the hospital) that I was just drunk, so they yelled at her. My dad got drunk a couple years ago and threatened suicide while trying to go get his gun and his brother, his sister in law, his older daughter, and his grandson all called me a liar saying he was just fine and I was probably overreacting because he got drunk and was talking out of his ass.
Odds are, Sarah was right to be worried, but her roommate hid the worst of it from everyone else and they didn’t want to see it anyway, so they dismissed it. And therapy and medication doesn’t work overnight so of course she is gonna say everything is a million times worse now. Even if her father is verbally abusive, she would get better with therapy and meds even though it would take longer (speaking from experience).
Wishing you the Very Best Success in your quest to become the you that you need. Dr. &I found a good balance of things to take, and improvement is showing for me – with occasional slip-ups. Hoping the best success for you. (Offers internet hugs and cookies)
i just want to say how much i appreciated the reference in the hovertext. A+ on that
oh Also i like the comic and story and characters and art but like
Simpsons reference yay
okay time for bed thank you mr willis
All in all I’m not sure I want them together as anything but friends. Even less if it involves the detriment or Raidah, unless of course it happens naturally.
Does anybody know how long it is until the last week of October in universe? I want to know how long I have to wait until I can reasonably expect the possibility of a costume party! 😉
At the current rate, I doubt we’ll see the end of the day for months. There’s still lots of fallout from this morning / last night that hasn’t landed yet, but probably has to come up today at least briefly
Not to mention whatever unexpected horrible thing Willis has planned for us.
All this smiling and self-improvement and healthy decision-making is starting to make me nervous.
Based off how how far Joyce had grown, you can probably extrapolate how much more would occur before said party. I wouldn’t be surprised if someone recommends something to her like a “Playgirl Bunny’ cause bunnies are cute and playful, and she’s a girl.
So if it’s the first or second week of October, we might could reasonably expect a Halloween party in 2 to 3 weeks their time meaning in 2 or 3 years, we get to see them in costumes! And I say that Joyce, Walky, and Dorothy will be something from Dexter and monkey master, Dina will be a scientifically correct dinosaur, Sarah will be roped into being either a princess or the like, Sierra will be a hippy, Roz sexy cat, Carla will be UC, Becky will dress up as something her parents would have never allowed like a sexy witch or vampire, Sal will either go major sexy or go for a laugh as something very prudish like her school girl outfit or a nun, Ethan would be something transformer related, Mike would show up as Mike or a villain, Danny would be a dog as a callback to a Roomies strip, and I’m not sure for everyone else like Ruth, Billy, and Jacob.
I really think that Jacob gets a bit too much enjoyment from teasing Sarah over how silly she can be in social contexts sometimes! It isn’t malicious but it is a bit unfair; Sarah has a difficult enough time getting out of her shell at the best of times so making a joke out of her awkwardness can’t help!
I dunno, for me it always comes as a relief. It says they’ve noticed, so I can stop worrying that they’re about to, and they’re comfortable enough around me to joke, so I can stop feeling awkward about the possibility they’re walking on eggshells around me.
On the other hand, I think I’m more comfortable laughing at myself than Sarah; it’s basically my go-to move where she gets prickly and defensive.
Last comic: I really like the last panel of the last comic for a bunch of different reasons. First up, reiterating that despite Sarah’s fantasies, Jacob is not at all interested in the type of relationship she wants. He’s liking something that’s low on the physical, that’s heavier on intellectual connection, and where he can focus on college rather than sex.
And that’s especially important when you note that in the other universe he had an intensely addictive personality and has had unhealthy relationship towards sex because of it. So to see him having something low-key that works for him and is healthy is important and it shows that despite Sarah’s wish to break them up, his relationship with Raidah is working for him at the moment and is healthy for him.
Panel 2, this comic: And that’s interesting, because I’ve been fascinated by Raidah growing out of her abusive interactions with Sarah into recognizing that their interactions are toxic for one reason or another. And that’s important. Some interactions are toxic because the other person harms you or undermines your mental health. Some because they bring out one’s worst self.
That Raidah recognized that toxicity for one reason or another and removed herself from the party before things got really bad was good as was the fact that she specified that Sarah was toxic for her rather than trying to police Jacob’s interactions.
And that’s all interesting, because Jacob recognizes that tension and that Raidah would recommend he not talk to Sarah, but he’s still free to talk to her on his own and make his own friendship connection and that’s an important thing.
That Raidah recognized that toxicity, and that it wasn’t a simple matter of Sarah being toxic, even after Sarah had punched her is what convinces me she’s probably a good person, despite how abysmal her reaction to Dina was.
Definitely too quick to judge people and too slow to let go of a grudge, but hopefully she’ll work on that.
Mostly agree, but I cannot help but note that this is ‘DUMBING Of Age’, where everyone makes dumb mistakes. i cannot help but worry/wonder that Jacob’s growing friendliness with Sarah (and her growing repressed lust for him) will somehow spark a night of highly ill-advised but completely spontaneous and unplanned sex that brings all of their good relationships crashing down.
Because that NEVER happens in real life. To anyone.
Panel 1: And on the same level, I like how Sarah doesn’t rise to using this opening to try and sabotage them. She’s moving on as well from the toxicity of her bullying at the hands of Raidah and her crew, avoiding the conversation that could go so bad and even though she’s hurt and scared of losing this small connection to another person with Jacob in panel 2…
Panel 3: She asks very plainly, but healthily about Jacob’s decision with that information, even though this is her nightmare. That people she gets close to will continue to abandon her because of the fallout from her making the best decision she could with what she knew with Dana.
And that shows a lot of personal growth.
Panels 4-6: And I love how that’s rewarded with playful banter and a gentle reminder from Jacob that she tried to sabotage the friendship out of fear of it imploding and her being abandoned before. That her friendship with him is fully in her hands and in growing into “making things better” she can move on and have a friend.
And sweet Jacob willing to be that even though it could cause tension in his relationship later.
It’s not what Sarah wants. But it’s what Sarah desperately needs. And this could be incredibly healthy for her in drawing her out of the traumas of her past into a land where she’s a misanthrope and an introvert, yes, but not one who believes that any human interaction is guaranteed to become toxic and soul-crushing.
I’m really interested in seeing how Sarah grows as a character. She and Joyce are kind of similar, but opposite, in my mind. Both are basically starting at 0 at the beginning of the school year considering Joyce was starting here without anyone she knew and everyone that Sarah knew hated her for forcing the one person that had been her friend to get the help she needed. Joyce approached it with optimism and Sarah with cynicism and they’ve rubbed off on one another, for better (I think). Joyce is no longer quite so naive and her optimism is tempered with experience that life (and people) aren’t quite as simple and clear-cut as she thought. Sarah is slowly (ever so slowly), becoming more optimistic and open with people. Joyce, Dina and Jacob have worked wonders to draw her out of her shell and have realized that they can’t pull her out of it too fast or too far otherwise she’ll snap back, so they’ve been slow and understanding about it.
At this point, I have to wonder if there was some Reidah Patreon comic. She’s never been anything but awful in the main comic. But you seem convinced she’s not. And you are “famous” for having comics to backup what you say.
Different interpretation of that strip, perhaps? She says “Some people are toxic, Jacob, and you need to cut them out of your life for your own sake.” But she follows that up with “Sarah is one of those people for me.”
I don’t read that “you” as referring to Jacob, but as a generic, which she clarifies in the next sentence with “for me”.
Prior to deciding to peacefully leave the party, pretty much every time Raidah saw Sarah, she would confront and harass her, and tell anyone associating with her to should stay away because she’s terrible. We only see it a couple times (at least once when she was minding her own business in the cafeteria, and then again at the mall), but it seemed heavily implied that this was an ongoing thing.
At the party, she reacted negatively to finding out Sarah was there, but instead of creating another needless confrontation, she left.
In between, Sarah had punched Raidah in the face, giving Raidah a much more solid justification for her opinion and treatment of her.
Instead, when Sarah found her and apologized, she accepted it.
The only plausible explanation for why she would stop bullying Sarah after basically having her position validated is if she had actually considered her own actions and had concluded that Sarah’s anger had been justified*, and that Raidah herself was responsible for at least some of the toxicity between them.
*Note: I’m not saying punching Raidah was justified, only the anger that motivated Sarah to do it.
As much as I (still) dislike Raidah, admitting (if only to yourself) that you’ve wronged someone after just having been wronged by them is mature AF.
I still want her to be on the receiving end of some sick burns from Dina, but she definitely has grown as a person.
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“you’d need a microscope”
She’s just a big ol’ softy now!
Misanthroscope.
You, sir, win an internet. Or several.
Several internets. (That’s still a “hip” and “cool” internet reference, right?)
Wait, is that a reference? I thought it was just an internet saying
What? It was just an internet saying? I thought it was a real award. Guess I’ll be putting these back where I found them then (tosses a box of internets behind some nearby bushes).
I’ll take them, if you don’t want them anymore.
Seconded, I seem to be missing some…
[Box of internets interprets the bushes as damage and routes around them]
*ramps up a scanning tunneling microscope*
Will this do?
Sarah you’ve talked to, like, 3 people today. How could we not notice?
Well, we’re not casual viewers. We’re creepy stalkers.
Hey! I am extremely offended by this statement. I am a creepy stalker. All you other guys are just copycats.
So everything aside, it’s doesn’t reflect very well on Jacob that he’s talking amicably with someone he thinks assaulted his girlfriend.
It reflects pretty well on him that he’s even-handed enough to consider that maybe just because he’s been to dinner with someone doesn’t mean they’ve given him a full and unbiased account of all their interactions.
he seems pretty mellow about things right now
Exactly. He got to know Sarah before Raidah and they got along fine. Breaking off all contact with Sarah because a girl he’s went out with a handful of times said she was a terrible person isn’t a very smart train of thought for someone going to school to become a lawyer. Now if they had been together a year and he had not met Sarah before, things would be different, but that’s not the case.
He probably figures there’s more than what Raidah is telling him. It isn’t a simple a “Sarah is a jerk who punched me” and their interaction he saw in Sarah’s room kinda sold that.
Based on what, though? Jacob’s interactions with Sarah often don’t end well, you have to admit it’s strange he keeps pursuing them.
Jacob’s recognized that a lot of Sarah’s worst moments come from trying to box out affection to the point where she told Jacob that he didn’t want to be friends with her, something she’s trying to overcome here.
If all he knew about Sarah was that she was the bongo who punched his girlfriend in the face then yes, it would be weird, but he has an established relationship with her.
Well Sarah did apologize….so it’s all good maybe? Ha
Actually it reflects pretty well that he doesn’t instantly believe he has the whole story because he seems aware that Raidah’s version of events is biased by her dislike of Sarah and lacks the full context. And he WAS friends with Sarah first so while he might not blame Raidah for her bias, he is probably quite aware that anything she says about Sarah is stained in it to make him dislike her.
To be fair, Raidah only said that Sarah was toxic for her, not that Jacob couldn’t talk to her or that other people couldn’t have healthy interactions with her. Which is actually a growth from where she was considering she harassed Sarah for a year over the idea that Sarah was toxic to everyone and must be isolated and hurt because of it:
http://www.dumbingofage.com/2015/comic/book-5/03-the-butterflies-fly-away/feigned/
Even though we know that Sarah is in the right, here, I’ve seen waaaaay too many incidences of “BF hangs out with girl who has crush on him, swears up and down it’s innocent even though GF is uncomfortable, is eventually tempted to do something heartbreaking.”
Here’s hoping at least that he will put a stop to it if Sarah becomes openly disrespectful of his and Raidah’s relationship, or that he will do right by Raidah and leave her first instead of going for a side piece.
Has anything about Jacob indicated that he’d do so? Also I hate cheating storylines so I’d be okay if they never happened because they are very, very rarely written well.
He might as well carry a business card wearing “hi I like hand holding and long chats about feelings.”
I feel like sarah when it comes to how i am getting better in general. ever so slowly that its almost like am i actually improving.
Hey, that’s rad. And whatever you’re trying to change, I hope you will take heart that gradual changes tend to be way more sustainable.
Sarah 1.0.0.1. Slightly more user friendly.
Can’t wait for the 1.0.0.2 version, which is full user friendly.(that might take a while)
Oh no. That’s Sarah 2.0.0.1, but I can see the mistake. They have talked about her being more user friendly in the next update, but that just means she will be less likely to physically assault people who are not currently attempting to harm her or any human labeled as “friend” or “tolerable associate”.
1.0.0.1 and 1.0.0.2 are both bugfix releases, which is good given how many mission critical bugs Sarah has.
Yup. Half the time she’s around NPC:Jacob, she freezes, glitches, or says dialog unrelated to the current mission. I’ve also seen her somehow react to him like an enemy and run away even though she is a warrior and her battle confidence is higher than 0.
Turns out in release 1.0.0.3 that when her battle confidence is set to 0 and then gains a rank in pacifist, she threatens to nuke everyone.
Sarah 1.0.0.1: 50% less likely to explode in flames!
still better odds than samsungs phones. thats the one that has been exploding right?
Yep. The Samsung Galaxy
Now comes with seven boxes to return her in!
Don’t forget about the no-fly rule.
Minor mannerism fixes.
So, is there a countdown to when Sarah screws everything up, or are we gonna keep this plate spinning until it can REALLY cause some damage? 😉
My guess is they actually get along great, and then Raidah comes in just in time to misinterpret what she sees.
quit using the tardis to spoil things 😛
No promises.
Aside from your usual ones…
Ah yes, that’s the reason Jacob shouldn’t mention Raidah
It puts the comment section into a tizzy?
We’ve replaced this Sarah with a ever-so-slightly less irritable one. Let’s see if he notices!
BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK!
Aww I’m so proud of Sarah right now 🙂
Me too. Her progress seems slow, but she’s been changing over less than two months which is a normal and frankly impressive pace. I’ve seen people improve less in a year than she has so far with a lot of it thanks to developing friends who care about her even with all her prickles and bluntness.
It’s due to her friendship with Dina. Dina wades into scary social situations without fear, is honest and open, and people respond well to that. She’s a great role model for a misanthrope like Sarah.
The difference is readily apparent, to skilled observers equipped with precisely calibrated instruments.
Calibrated against the International Standard Misanthrope, a hermit in the Pyrenees?
But does it account for quantum theory?
Does the new Sarah discover any version of Sarah as a new topic she might spend her deprecations on?
*plays Patti LaBelle’s “New Attitude” on the hacked Muzak*
I’m mostly happy because Jacob is a real cool dude who doesn’t judge people based on others’ words, i know way too many people including me fall into that kinda trap sometimes
I judge based on the word of someone who I completely trust and known for years. That list is currently two people. Everyone else I listen with a healthy level of internal skepticism.
is one of those people yourself?
Lol! I meant that when it comes to the opinion of others I only trust two people without pause, but as trusting as I can be I might should not trust my own judgment XD
Yeah. Beware your OWN biases. A lot of people miss that.
Yeah. I’m not gonna lie, I have biases caused by my upbringing and the town I live in which I am slowly but surely weeding through. Take trans* people for example. When I found out that they were something that existed, I was pretty unnerved. I was in my early 20s to boot. It didn’t help that the people I knew painted a pretty bigoted picture of them. I took people’s word too much back then.
Then there was a person on TV who was identified male at birth, was trans*, and stopped in the middle because they were happy right there. That left me completely confused for so many reasons! How could someone be both male and female and neither at the same time? What pronouns do you use on someone who was a mix match of attributes attributes to males and females? Why stop in the middle instead of picking one? We’re they really trans* or just a fashion choice? The gender binary was all I ever knew and finding out that there was more was the equivalent of seeing someone with naturally green skin and glowing eyes for me. It broke all the rules I knew and I automatically tried to categorize while part of me seen it as unnatural as well as fascinating.
Then there was a documentary on intersex individuals and people who weren’t perfectly binary. I was fascinated. There really were naturally occurring people who weren’t male or female. There were people who were genetically one gender while presenting as another. There were people born that didn’t fit easily in a category and had surgery without their knowledge in the name of gender normalization. Gender was some kind of lie I had been taught. I think the most jarring part was the part about the babies who had surgery without their knowledge as the realization hit that I had a scar where my labia minora should be which my parents had told me was because the doctors said they found a birth defect which had to be fixed.
Then there was a show I watched. It interviewed a transwoman and she was… normal for lack of a better word. She wasn’t any of the things I had been taught, but she had a difficult life because of how people treated her and the law was against her. And I felt like shit because even though I wasn’t someone who sent her death threats or bullied her or tried to take away her rights, I would have looked at her like she was off. I was ashamed and realized I was a bigot, so I decided to stop.
I started doing research. Reading research and personal stories. Watching documentaries. Reading web comics with someone in the cast who wasn’t cis. Gathering data. Learning. And I realized that all those things I had been told when I was younger were misguided at best and terrible bigoted stereotypes that people thought shouldn’t exist at worst. So I changed and became a better person. I threw out all the old information I had in my brain. I embraced being polysexual as I realized that not only was I attracted so some of the people who didn’t fit the binary label, but could see myself dating one of them if the opportunity arose.
Later, I ended up in the hospital and met a gender fluid individual. She (using the pronoun used while there) was trying to figure out who she was and the words for how to explain how she felt while surrounded by people who called her crazy. I ended up being the only person who was kind to her in there. She was use to people being assholes or keeping their distance, but not use to people being kind and friendly. And I felt like an ass all over again because not too long ago I would have thought terribly of this sweet kind energetic person.
I do believe that my personal hell would be your second paragraph. Gods damn compulsion to have a label for everything. I applaud your growth, and which to complete mine, but that has to wait until I deal with the shitstorm of my personal life. Until then, I utilize what may be know as “LA LA LA Not Listening” or something like that.
new sarah carries a bat
What kind? Fruit bat?
Actually, that’d be old Sarah. I don’t think we’ve seen new Sarah brandish a bat yet.
The weighting of the “Threaten/hit with a bat” option in her decision matrix has been reduced considerably.
New Sarah’s bat.
Old Sarah was the bat. New Sarah flips tables.
Sounds like normal modern “product improvement” to me.
Does that make Jacob a Ken knockoff then?
Nope. A Steven knockoff 😉
Sarah also has a super hero alter ego…
MS. ANTHROPE!
Her power is to hide her emotions deep deep inside her heart where they can never escape
unless Jacob is within 20 feet of her he’s her kryptonite
They are totally gonna bang.
Well yeah, if Jacob isn’t careful there he’ll drop his textbook. It’ll certainly make a small ruckus.
I don’t want Malibu Sarah with a new hat! I want Sarah sans headwear.
In all seriousness, she has beautiful hair that she has been covering up since the incident with her last roommate. It’s almost like a way for her to hide or a security blanket. I’m happy to see her progress and am looking forward to when she resolves her issues that were caused by last semester’s drama.
You and Becky both.
gotta love those 4th wall breaks
where
Don’t you know by now? Everything is breaking 4th walls because we can obviously only see 3 walls at a time and sometimes characters say things that obviously mean more because they are talking to us and not that other person or themselves because reasons!
Sarah’s expressions in the last two panels do totally work if you imagine she’s spotted us in panel 5 and is trying to act casual about it
Lol! It does doesn’t it? She’s just sitting there wondering why the crazy is watching her so intently XD
* Yes. We know it’s not meant to be that. Please don’t hurt us!
“Casual Viewer” doesn’t have to be 4th wall, or it could be. Might be both, or neither. Sarah might just be dreaming the whole thing.
Sarah is joking about how people wouldn’t notice minor changes if they didn’t know her well.
I like Jacob. No wonder everyone wants to date him (iirc).
No, some people just want to bone him.
For REEEEEASONS.
So, does the new talking Sarah say “Math is hard!”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DaOgZwk9rN8
Yes, but sarcastically, to mock Walky
NOT ENOUGH MOCK!
You know, I know that Sarah’s only really hoping for a quick trip to Sexytime Town, but I really do hope that these two develop a good friendship. Whatever Sarah tells herself, she does seem to be more open and at ease when talking to Jacob, and while Jacob’s mellow enough to take her misanthropic tendencies in stride, he’s also not afraid to call her out on said tendencies. Hell, maybe he can bring a good third-party perspective to the problems between Raidah and Sarah.
These Sarah faces are 2kewt.
That, and it’s nice to see her realize that she needs to pull herself out of her misanthropy. She doesn’t need to go Full Joyce for people to like her, she can be Sarah and be happy, but there’s a lot wrong about her that’s of her own creation and it’s time she starts to address it.
Also I started therapy yesterday and I’m excited enough about that to want to shout about it (anonymously on the internet).
Congrats! How did it go?
It went well! I’m seeing her again on Thursday, and it’s about damn time I do this.
Only thing wrong with Sarah is that she got crapped on by her entire dorm floor so doing what she thought was right. And I think she did the right thing myself.
People refused to set with her at lunch, study with her, called her names, and Raidah and friends actually assaulted her. So yeah, Sarah said to Hell with this and proceeded to ignore them and immerse herself in her studies.
Until Joyce.
And then Becky.
And she had a huge crush on Jacob before he started going with Raidah. Sarah realized she wasn’t ready for a steady one on one…till she found out he was dating Raidah, and then it was too late.
So maybe, it is and maybe it isn’t. I’m proud of Sarah, she is out there trying. Hey, she walked to class with ‘friends’, she is talking to Jacob, and sitting up front of the class. That’s pretty good progress.
I’m proud of her too. It may have taken years our time, but it has been less than a couple months in her time since Joyce came crashing into her life.
And as a side note, believe me when I say that people only believe what that want to believe. I ODed once after fighting it for a year and nobody believed it had happened and thought it was out of the blue. My best friend called my dad and my then boyfriend who I told (before being taken to the hospital) that I was just drunk, so they yelled at her. My dad got drunk a couple years ago and threatened suicide while trying to go get his gun and his brother, his sister in law, his older daughter, and his grandson all called me a liar saying he was just fine and I was probably overreacting because he got drunk and was talking out of his ass.
Odds are, Sarah was right to be worried, but her roommate hid the worst of it from everyone else and they didn’t want to see it anyway, so they dismissed it. And therapy and medication doesn’t work overnight so of course she is gonna say everything is a million times worse now. Even if her father is verbally abusive, she would get better with therapy and meds even though it would take longer (speaking from experience).
According to Sarah, that is exactly what happened. They saw what they wanted to see.
That’s great!
Wishing you the Very Best Success in your quest to become the you that you need. Dr. &I found a good balance of things to take, and improvement is showing for me – with occasional slip-ups. Hoping the best success for you. (Offers internet hugs and cookies)
Yay! Congratulations! Here’s hoping it helps out.
[crosses fingers]
It’s really nice knowing so many people here are supportive of me.
Kick therapy’s ass! Show it you’re the Alpha!
Congratulations! I hope all continues to go well and that it goes as peacefully as possible <3
i just want to say how much i appreciated the reference in the hovertext. A+ on that
oh Also i like the comic and story and characters and art but like
Simpsons reference yay
okay time for bed thank you mr willis
Rest well. And remember, thinking gives you wrinkles 😉
I see the new Sarah is also able to channel her inner snark into humor snark at times.
BUT SHE’S GOT A NEW HAT!
I liked Jacob tolerably will before, but the amicable mild sassery here bumps him up several notches
All in all I’m not sure I want them together as anything but friends. Even less if it involves the detriment or Raidah, unless of course it happens naturally.
Right now though? I don’t see it happening.
Friends is good. Sarah needs friends, and she is trying for it.
I don’t give a fig if it is to ‘the detriment of Raidah’ or not. Sarah is much the better person.
I like both Sarah and Jacob. Friends or ship doesn’t matter to me.
Until Raidah gets flushed out. I think the only recurring character that can’t be saved is Mary, except by hand of god.
Does anybody know how long it is until the last week of October in universe? I want to know how long I have to wait until I can reasonably expect the possibility of a costume party! 😉
It’s early October currently. Maybe the 7th?
At the current rate, I doubt we’ll see the end of the day for months. There’s still lots of fallout from this morning / last night that hasn’t landed yet, but probably has to come up today at least briefly
Not to mention whatever unexpected horrible thing Willis has planned for us.
All this smiling and self-improvement and healthy decision-making is starting to make me nervous.
Brainstorm time! What do yall think everyone in the cast would dress as and would Joyce be able to participate?
Based off how how far Joyce had grown, you can probably extrapolate how much more would occur before said party. I wouldn’t be surprised if someone recommends something to her like a “Playgirl Bunny’ cause bunnies are cute and playful, and she’s a girl.
Maybe Sarah was having a vision of Halloween with “Apply Within”?
This made me laugh more than it should have XD
So if it’s the first or second week of October, we might could reasonably expect a Halloween party in 2 to 3 weeks their time meaning in 2 or 3 years, we get to see them in costumes! And I say that Joyce, Walky, and Dorothy will be something from Dexter and monkey master, Dina will be a scientifically correct dinosaur, Sarah will be roped into being either a princess or the like, Sierra will be a hippy, Roz sexy cat, Carla will be UC, Becky will dress up as something her parents would have never allowed like a sexy witch or vampire, Sal will either go major sexy or go for a laugh as something very prudish like her school girl outfit or a nun, Ethan would be something transformer related, Mike would show up as Mike or a villain, Danny would be a dog as a callback to a Roomies strip, and I’m not sure for everyone else like Ruth, Billy, and Jacob.
[Insert Joke About Becky Thinking For Herself Here]
Itty bitty more improved.
teeny weenie more colorful?
I really think that Jacob gets a bit too much enjoyment from teasing Sarah over how silly she can be in social contexts sometimes! It isn’t malicious but it is a bit unfair; Sarah has a difficult enough time getting out of her shell at the best of times so making a joke out of her awkwardness can’t help!
I dunno, for me it always comes as a relief. It says they’ve noticed, so I can stop worrying that they’re about to, and they’re comfortable enough around me to joke, so I can stop feeling awkward about the possibility they’re walking on eggshells around me.
On the other hand, I think I’m more comfortable laughing at myself than Sarah; it’s basically my go-to move where she gets prickly and defensive.
Someday she might graduate up to only mildly irritable.
*gasp*
Good thing Jacob is so observant.
Comic Reactions:
Last comic: I really like the last panel of the last comic for a bunch of different reasons. First up, reiterating that despite Sarah’s fantasies, Jacob is not at all interested in the type of relationship she wants. He’s liking something that’s low on the physical, that’s heavier on intellectual connection, and where he can focus on college rather than sex.
And that’s especially important when you note that in the other universe he had an intensely addictive personality and has had unhealthy relationship towards sex because of it. So to see him having something low-key that works for him and is healthy is important and it shows that despite Sarah’s wish to break them up, his relationship with Raidah is working for him at the moment and is healthy for him.
Panel 2, this comic: And that’s interesting, because I’ve been fascinated by Raidah growing out of her abusive interactions with Sarah into recognizing that their interactions are toxic for one reason or another. And that’s important. Some interactions are toxic because the other person harms you or undermines your mental health. Some because they bring out one’s worst self.
That Raidah recognized that toxicity for one reason or another and removed herself from the party before things got really bad was good as was the fact that she specified that Sarah was toxic for her rather than trying to police Jacob’s interactions.
And that’s all interesting, because Jacob recognizes that tension and that Raidah would recommend he not talk to Sarah, but he’s still free to talk to her on his own and make his own friendship connection and that’s an important thing.
That Raidah recognized that toxicity, and that it wasn’t a simple matter of Sarah being toxic, even after Sarah had punched her is what convinces me she’s probably a good person, despite how abysmal her reaction to Dina was.
Definitely too quick to judge people and too slow to let go of a grudge, but hopefully she’ll work on that.
Mostly agree, but I cannot help but note that this is ‘DUMBING Of Age’, where everyone makes dumb mistakes. i cannot help but worry/wonder that Jacob’s growing friendliness with Sarah (and her growing repressed lust for him) will somehow spark a night of highly ill-advised but completely spontaneous and unplanned sex that brings all of their good relationships crashing down.
Because that NEVER happens in real life. To anyone.
I don’t think that would be in-character for this Jacob.
The guy who banged Amber’s mom? Maybe, but this Jacob seems to have Danny-levels of relationship commitment.
Joe’s dad?
Panel 1: And on the same level, I like how Sarah doesn’t rise to using this opening to try and sabotage them. She’s moving on as well from the toxicity of her bullying at the hands of Raidah and her crew, avoiding the conversation that could go so bad and even though she’s hurt and scared of losing this small connection to another person with Jacob in panel 2…
Panel 3: She asks very plainly, but healthily about Jacob’s decision with that information, even though this is her nightmare. That people she gets close to will continue to abandon her because of the fallout from her making the best decision she could with what she knew with Dana.
And that shows a lot of personal growth.
Panels 4-6: And I love how that’s rewarded with playful banter and a gentle reminder from Jacob that she tried to sabotage the friendship out of fear of it imploding and her being abandoned before. That her friendship with him is fully in her hands and in growing into “making things better” she can move on and have a friend.
And sweet Jacob willing to be that even though it could cause tension in his relationship later.
It’s not what Sarah wants. But it’s what Sarah desperately needs. And this could be incredibly healthy for her in drawing her out of the traumas of her past into a land where she’s a misanthrope and an introvert, yes, but not one who believes that any human interaction is guaranteed to become toxic and soul-crushing.
I’m really interested in seeing how Sarah grows as a character. She and Joyce are kind of similar, but opposite, in my mind. Both are basically starting at 0 at the beginning of the school year considering Joyce was starting here without anyone she knew and everyone that Sarah knew hated her for forcing the one person that had been her friend to get the help she needed. Joyce approached it with optimism and Sarah with cynicism and they’ve rubbed off on one another, for better (I think). Joyce is no longer quite so naive and her optimism is tempered with experience that life (and people) aren’t quite as simple and clear-cut as she thought. Sarah is slowly (ever so slowly), becoming more optimistic and open with people. Joyce, Dina and Jacob have worked wonders to draw her out of her shell and have realized that they can’t pull her out of it too fast or too far otherwise she’ll snap back, so they’ve been slow and understanding about it.
When I read the alt-text, I thought it said new bat.
Where are you pulling this from? Reidah has not been in the comic in a long time. The last time we saw her discussing this issue, she flat out called Sarah toxic and used Sarah’s punch as proof. And told Jacob he couldn’t be friends with her.
http://www.dumbingofage.com/2015/comic/book-5/03-the-butterflies-fly-away/feigned/
At this point, I have to wonder if there was some Reidah Patreon comic. She’s never been anything but awful in the main comic. But you seem convinced she’s not. And you are “famous” for having comics to backup what you say.
That’s to Cerberus. I’m not sure why it isn’t under her first comment that actually addresses Reidah and the character growth she sees that I don’t.
Different interpretation of that strip, perhaps? She says “Some people are toxic, Jacob, and you need to cut them out of your life for your own sake.” But she follows that up with “Sarah is one of those people for me.”
I don’t read that “you” as referring to Jacob, but as a generic, which she clarifies in the next sentence with “for me”.
Reading that a bit harsh, but must just be me then.
Prior to deciding to peacefully leave the party, pretty much every time Raidah saw Sarah, she would confront and harass her, and tell anyone associating with her to should stay away because she’s terrible. We only see it a couple times (at least once when she was minding her own business in the cafeteria, and then again at the mall), but it seemed heavily implied that this was an ongoing thing.
At the party, she reacted negatively to finding out Sarah was there, but instead of creating another needless confrontation, she left.
In between, Sarah had punched Raidah in the face, giving Raidah a much more solid justification for her opinion and treatment of her.
Instead, when Sarah found her and apologized, she accepted it.
http://www.dumbingofage.com/2012/comic/book-2/06-strange-beerfellows/relax/
The only plausible explanation for why she would stop bullying Sarah after basically having her position validated is if she had actually considered her own actions and had concluded that Sarah’s anger had been justified*, and that Raidah herself was responsible for at least some of the toxicity between them.
*Note: I’m not saying punching Raidah was justified, only the anger that motivated Sarah to do it.
As much as I (still) dislike Raidah, admitting (if only to yourself) that you’ve wronged someone after just having been wronged by them is mature AF.
I still want her to be on the receiving end of some sick burns from Dina, but she definitely has grown as a person.
Whoops, now I’m doing it. This was supposed to be a reply to trlkly.