HEY GUYS DANIELLE CORSETTO (girls with slingshots) IS LIKE DRIVING ACROSS THE WHOLE DAMN COUNTRY AND SHE’S GONNA BE IN COLUMBUS, OHIO, ON SUNDAY, JULY 6, AT THE LAUGHING OGRE (comic book store) WITH ME, DAVID WILLIS (dumbing of age) AND ALSO KATIE VALESKA AND LORA INNES
THAT’S JULY 6
4 TO 8 PM
JUST SO YOU KNOW
also i’ll be at the ogre again on july 13 from noon to three, but without danielle and the others
Loading ...
Mike’s dick.
And that’s news to whom?
Joyce. Based on the last panel.
I see what you did there
now with more stamina.
And why not female genitalia?
Mike: peen-board stalker
We were made harder, better, faster, stronger.
That was impressively quick.
(…is what your mom said last night ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh)
…So you don’t have that much stamina, eh?
You only get so much time for a nickel
More than hour, our, never
……checkmate.
*dickmate.
I fixed it.
*fify
fify
FTFY
FTFY
FTFY
Mike and Dina make a surprisingly good team. Dina wears Joyce down psychologically with her facts and reasoning, and Mike takes the distraction as a chance to be Mike. Interaction between them would be interesting to see.
Not that I’d ship the two or anything. Last time it ended…poorly for all parties.
Well, Dina’s certainly doing her best here.
Dina’s actually right about one thing. When you’re engaged in a battle of wills, patience is the most important requirement. Especially when you’re on the defensive. Mike can always find some other target for his misanthropy, but Ajoyce doesn’t want human genitals drawn on her whiteboard. Even if Mike walks away, he can always come back later and draw one at his leisure. Does Joyce really expect to be able to guard that thing 24/7?
Joyce has basically two options: take down the whiteboard, or report Mike for sexual harassment. Otherwise, she will be caught in a never-ending war with a dedicated troll, who’s skilled at pranking people. Me, I’d just figure a way to escalate this into a recurring prank battle, but that’s just me.
Or three, get over her fear of cartoon pictures of dicks, leave it on the whiteboard, and Mike will get bored and find some other way to harass her.
Seriously. If there was a taboo on chickens instead of dicks, people would draw chickens on everyone’s whiteboard, because chickens would get everyone’s underwear all up in their cracks.
Though, that makes me wonder – I’ve seen guys troll other guys with drawings of vulvas/vaginal openings, but I can’t recall seeing a woman trolled with one. Both men AND women get trolled with pictures of dicks. Is it because dicks are ugly?
I always figured dicks were just easier to draw recognizably?
No dude wants to draw a vagina on a girl’s get-well-soon card only to have her ask if he’s ever even seen one before.
LOL This is true. I guess they DO have a readily-available live reference most of the time, don’t they? XD
It’s also probably because penises are a lot funnier than vaginas.
There are LOTS of symbolism associated with dicks as the “initiator” of sexuality while the vulva is the “recipient”. In this context it gives the dick a higher degree of vulgarity.
That is really questionable. When it comes to Words, especially in American English, various vaginal cursewords are considered far and away more vulgar than the penis related ones.
With drawings, I think it’s largely because it is much easier to draw a penis quickly than a vagina. Hell, even Ascii allows for a penis with 3-4 characters, a vagina wouldn’t be as easily recognizable without more characters.
You are right, they are both considered vulgar enough to be worth the effort.
A heart <3 is a symbol of vulva and butt. So everyone draws them on everything. For LUUUURVV.
Honestly, Mike strikes me as the guy who would just get more creative and cruel to counter a harrassment charge like that, while also somehow skirting around getting caught.
If you have a whiteboard in College, people will draw/write dumb shit on it. It’s a fact of life. Joyce’s best option is to take it down [since her roommate doesn’t even really want it anyway] and wait for it to blow over.
The best she could do.
oh god right in the feels… yeah that relationship ended awfully…
When did Dina use facts or reasoning?
In panel two. And quite effectively too I must say.
Uh, most of what Dina’s saying is boring old scientific fact as it is best understood?
Well, not ALL badly… I mean, it was the first time we saw Mike actually feel genuinely bad about something, wasn’t it?
Later on, we find out that Mike paid Dina to distract Joyce so he wouldn’t have to wait all day to do it.
It cost him a box of Fruity Pebbles. Not the stuff from the dining hall either, a whole box so she could complete her set of dinosaur stickers.
Totally worth it. ^_^
How much did he pay her?
I think her reserves his nickles for your mom, so a dime or quarter, most likely.
We need more of Becky! We haven’t seen her in forever!
hmm
Is that an indication of future strips with her?
He posted character art of Becky on Tumblr about a month ago, so she’s probably appearing sometime soon… on the other hand, said art was posted around the same time as previews for comics in mid-September.
Conclusion: Becky will be back, but maybe not for a while.
Can you link to the tumblr page?
Here’s the link.
The art in question was only Becky reference model I think, and he did it as an exercise.
Can I put in a request for more Jocelyne while we’re at it? She’s rad.
^ This! I’ve been wondering how she’s been doing – I don’t recall seeing Ethan ever follow up on the writing advice/discussion thing.
I believe it’s been established she will definitely appear, but not for some time.
We humans also developed the ability to work in concert with one another to achieve our objectives.
We humans also use our opposable thumbs to hold tools. Some of which are used to draw male genitalia.
*Many
*All
Definitely all.
…and some just use their opposable thumbs to hold male genitalia.
…and brag about it to other mammals.
“Woo-ooh, opposable thumbs, swinging my dick around… Can you do that, lions? Can you?” *waves dick in front of face*
I think waving your dick in the face of a lion would be a REMARKABLY bad move…
This is not the kind of pussy you want your penis to be inside
“BAM! Weenus-pointed!!”
…just report sexual harassment.
As I recall, Joyce finds that embarrassing. If a rapist wasn’t a big enough deal, I doubt Mike is.
I feel like an asshole, typing this.
It’s not about the attempted rape not being a big enough deal. It’s just the fact that it was such a painful experience for her, and talking about it would only bring that feeling back.
Meanwhile, this thing with Mike isn’t actually painful, just a nuisance. So she could actually report it. I bet she won’t cause she’s friendly with the guy, but she may threaten him with reporting.
And she thought her parents would immediately drag her home for being roofied at a party.
This was exactly it.
I suspect it’s not so much a case of either the rapist or Mike’s asshattery being “a big enough deal,” it’s that even sheltered Joyce has an idea of the wringer women are put through for reporting any kind of sexual violence. From harassment like Mike’s drawings or catcalling, all the way up to undeniable rape, women are dragged through emotional and sometimes physical mud to see any justice done. While we might not have thumbscrews put to us literally anymore, the way Artemisia Gentileschi many other women did in the past, reporting and following through on sexual violence can leave women with long-term trauma even beyond the initial incident.
That’s not to say she still shouldn’t report either of them – but I certainly understand where her hesitation comes from.
Only too true. And a bully like Mike will make the entire process as painful as possible for her.
One of the hardest things I had to do at a former job was supporting a co-worker who was being harassed by her ex-boyfriend and two of our supervisors. She didn’t realized that when they were slut-shaming her it was sexual harassment until I spoke up and told them point blank to stop it.
I also ended up filling out an incident report and had a major interview with the head of HR and my top boss at HR’s request after she reported the harassment two days later. Top boss thanked me for supporting my co-worker and mentioned that he regretted not hearing the slut-shaming going on, because I shouldn’t have had to take on the responsibility of stopping the harassment.
BTW what Mike(and Sarah) is doing is creating a hostile environment.
Welp, that leaves Pokemon out of the conversation then.
I think Pokemon would be a bad topic for both sides. Joyce would be pointing to it as an attempt at atheists forcing their beliefs, and Dina would just go raptor-face as she hisses “That’s not how evolution works!”
http://www.vgcats.com/super/?strip_id=50
Super Effective is a great Pokemon webcomic, it’s a pity it is so rarely updated.
All. Over. My. Body.
I still chuckle.
One that left me laughing high was the shuffle in the grass.
Welp, now I had to go read 10 strips of VG Cats, after having not read it for a couple years. Luckly I’m all caught up not from where I left off.
Pokémon evolution is really just rapid metamorphosis, and most scientists that play it are okay with that. The game was inspired by the life cycle of backyard insects, after all. We just call it evolving because it’s easier to say, and more likely to fit in 8-bit textbox limits. Kinda like how “birds” is easier to say than “modern-day aerial dinosaurs.”
No, I totally get that; I mean, it’s also just a video game, so it’s using game logic, not real world logic, and it has it’s own setting.
I’m just making a joke based on how I think Joyce would react, because that is kinda how she thinks scientists really think evolution works, and Dina being pissed about that, because it isn’t. Sorry if I didn’t make that clear.
Given that Dina has a comic wherein she lists the many flaws of Jurassic Park on a scientific level, she would probably not just quietly accept that Pokemon gets the term wrong.
Well, given that she wrote them out in list format, ‘quietly’ is probably an appropriate adjective on a literal, if not figurative, level.
Jurassic is intended to be perceived as taking place in the real world, at least as its starting point. Pokemon seems to be more obviously a wholly fictional universe.
Pokémon’s world maps are all based on real world locations. Gen 1 through 4 take place in sections of Japan, 5 was New York City (and parts of New Jersey), 6 is France.
Gen 1 even went as far as to leave the region’s name the same as its real-life counterpart. I only WISH real Earth was as cool as PokÉarth.
Northwestern France, in the specific, and Gen 5 is a little bit more New York in general.
One COULD argue that it’s not evolution in the manner of Darwinian, but is most certainly evolution in the form of metamorphosis.
Why call it evolution when there are so many better synonyms for metamorphosis?
Digitize
Maximize
Terrorize
Transform
Level up.
Cuz Digitize sounds very digital based.
Maximize is inaccurate because there’s multiple evolutions so the first evolution wouldn’t exactly be “maximized”
Terrorize sound more like…to put terror into and Pokemon are supposed to be Cute and Friendly for kids.
And Transform is the name of a pokemon attack already.
Clearly the best word is “Transmogrify”.
“Morph” would have been best, but it was the nineties and that word was already strongly associated with another franchise.
Evolution in Pokemon is a misnomer, but Evolution as we know it clearly exists in the Pokemon. A lot of pokemon are specialized for their environment. Take Spearow and Pidgey, who live in an urban region, or Skarmory, a steel-type bird who make their nests out of the very thorny sticks of the surrounding plant life.
Ughhhhhhhhh, Joyce. I *want* to not get angry at you all the time, I really do. But you do make it hard.
I know what you mean
*looks at Mike’s drawing* “That’s a semi at most”.
LOL nice 😉
Though I doubt Joyce had anything to do with the hardness or non-hardness of Mike’s penis drawing^^
Are you sure about that, maybe he’s the type of guy who only draws engorged hard-ons on the doors of people he really fancies.
So like a 5 year-old pulling a girl’s pigtails, but with dicks?
Ok yeah, I see it xD
That’s pretty much it. 😀
I never grew out of that phase. Hence why I’m single.
It’s probably not intentional, but I appreciate the fact that this strip and the last one have been available early on Patreon, so you could get them if you just COULDN’T WAIT for your fix… and they’re all about how Joyce just isn’t as patient as she liked to think she was.
So will there be Patreon-exclusive strips?
There will if pledging reaches a certain level!
Aw, shoot, her brand of Christianity is dominionist, too? Bummer.
I always preferred the translation in which humans are given *stewardship* over the land. (I think it’s more of a literal translation, but I’m not quite that good at Biblical Hebrew to know for certain.)
Oh wait, that’s not what Dominionism means at all. Derp. Time for bed.
Isn’t that a pizza cult?
Yes, it is. We meet up and sacrifice pepperoni and cheese to the pizza gods.
But only the most artificial pepperoni and cheese.
No, Dominoism is the belief that whenever something goes wrong, it’ll trigger something else going wrong, which will trigger something else going wrong, etc.
So, basically, being a realist.
Interestingly she said “other” animals. Which leads me to believe she accepts the fact humans are animals. That’s actually pretty good given her upbringing.
Or she could just be humoring Dina.
How can anyone draw that fast?
Also, if you guys are going to have a debate on the merits of Joyce’s beliefs… I’m gonna sit it out. Okay I get it, Joyce is a Biblical literalist. Hooray for noticing!
Speaking of animals… turns out Sunstreaker knows what horses are! He doesn’t like to talk about his time as a Headmaster, but he has some of Hunter O’Nion’s basic memories. So he showed me a hologram if a horse, explained how they used to be an essential component of human society and are now a total anachronism. He couldn’t understand Billie’s comment though. I gave him an energon spritzer on the house, and let Bob have an energy cube.
oh please, I could draw TWENTY dongs in the time it takes to say, “Dina, enough with the evolution stuff. God gave us dominion over the other animals. Human beings were created superior.”
d
do
dongsdongsdongsdongsdongsdongsdongs
Did a few quick motions, it would take me only five seconds. Mike’s probably got it down to three.
Well, remember, Dumbing of Age is informed by David Willis’s life experiences. And David Willis can totally draw a dong in two seconds.
You’re right, Joyce. That means that, obviously, since Mike wants to draw dicks he should, since he’s God’s superior creation. That, and Mike’s just showing appreciation for God’s handiwork.
…What? It makes as much sense as what Joyce said.
Yes but she doesn’t run on logic.
So, Dina destracted the prey while Mike struck from the side.
Clever girl.
I was certain that would be the alt-text today, maybe even the final line.
GAH, I knew someone would beat me to it!
There is a ~double team~ joke about penises in there somewhere, but I’m just. Not. Gonna even try xD
Two hallmates, one whiteboard.
That was an obvious trap Joyce you got to be more on your toes.
Humans are superior? I beg to differ.
Who made you spokesperson of…,umm, who are you speaking for exactly?
I speak for Humans Aren’t That Special….or HATS for short.
Eh, your species has its good points. Your small, yet bipedal form make good holomatter avatars (though your hair is a real pain to get right), you’ve produced a unique fusion of two mediums in the comic book, and Optimus and Ultra Magnus both like you guys, so you can’t be all bad. And you made a movie about a horse playing football! How many other sapient species can say they’ve done that! (Now that I know what a horse actually is, I’ve been learning more and more odd facts about them!)
Oh come now, you Cybertronians are just as impressive. Especially the fact that you guys can just blend in almost anywhere.
Not all of us. The Dinobots and Monsterbots stick out like rusty thumbs, the Monoformers don’t transform (since they’ve had their T-cogs surgically removed) and the rest of us often need to have our alt-modes adjusted to local mechines when visiting a new planet.
The main area we have humans beat is our lifespans. I have no idea why a creature with such a short lifespan would waste so much of it arguing with total strangers. Discussing something with friends, that I get, but your lives seem pretty short to me; why waste so much of it in a futile manner?
Well, that’s humans for you. We just like doing futile things, I guess.
If you only want to discuss things wirh friends, is that why you wage war with other people?
War’s over buddy. Has been for over a stellar cycle. The Lost Light’s on a quest! Completely different. On a quest you hang out with friends, drink engex, and shoot the breeze.
Not on Earth, it ain’t…or haven’t you heard? Galvatron’s leading the Cons on Earth and he’s allied with the humans. Heck, Soundwave’s been telling the folks on Earth that the Cons all rally behind Galvatron for “harmony”. And since when Prowl can become Devastator?
Swerve reminds me of how happy The Last Federation makes me for making its ‘stellar year’ not even remotely resemble an earth year in actual duration. I always love it when shit doesn’t sync up perfectly with what hunam have in the real world.
@Aizat: re: Prowl; well one of my ship’s “co-captains” tinkered with Prowl. That and the hatred he and the Constructicons share for Spike Witwicky, they can combine into Devastator. They’ve done it at least twice that I know of, and the Constructicons have become Prowl’s groupies. You’d think that their approval would fill Prowl with shame…
As for the rest of that stuff, we’ve got a quest to complete! I’m sure whatever’s wrong with Earth, Optimus can fix it!
Okay, protip: if you want to know what a horse looks like, go watch that movie about the horse playing football.
Though keep in mind: they don’t actually play football in real life. We only let dogs do that, and the occasional human.
Pretty sure we only let dogs play Handegg, not Football.
Sunstreaker showed me what a horse is. And Bluestreak thinks he has a copy of that movie.
Although I don’t know why both sides of evolution vs creation would argue on that point, isn’t that the one thing they should agree on.
Evolutionary speaking, the only species we’re clearly superior to are the ones we’ve managed to kill completely out of existence. And by that metric, there are many, many species that have been around longer than us, and which will probably outlast us. So yeah.
Pfffft! The brotherhood knows that mutants are superior to meer humans, I mean it even says so in their discription “Homo sapien superior”.
Fool, I was talking about our reptilian overlords! The Dinosaur Empire will rise again!
Not as long as squirrels and rats keep on eatting their eggs they wont.
Mammals uber alles!
Warm blood and live births FTW!
Warm blood and live births Fuck The World?
For The Win.
Are you sure it isn’t Fuck the world, cause that makes more sense
As internet slang/shorthand it’s supposed to be “For The Win”, but after answering you the first time I began thinking your definition is more appropriate as regards humans and what our population explosion has done to the planet.
It’s just homo superior.
Maybe, but really, it SHOULD be Homo Sapiens Superior, as they are able to produce viable offspring with Homo Sapiens Sapiens (Normal humans, and yes, that is what we are, as oppsed to Homo Sapiens Neanderthalis (Formerly Homo Neanderthalis) as evidence shows we and Neanderthals interbred, and for the genes to be able to be passed down, we would have to be the same species, merely a different subspecies).
Not only are humans and mutants able to produce viable offspring, the offspring can be either human or mutant. In fact, there have been cases of two mutants having human offspring. And that’s before you get into “M-Day”, magic and the girl named Hope. As far as I can see, mutants are a breed of humans, not a separate species.
It’s just that they got powers and we humans don’t….and now I know why people hate mutants…it’s jealousy! And Magneto.
And the fact that Xavier went on television, told everyone mutants would replace them as the dominant species on Earth and they should just accept it. He was kind of a stupid dick for a few decades.
And people were pissed that Cyclops killed the guy? The same guy who mindwiped Cyclops so he didn’t remember the other team that died at Krakoa?
On the other hand, humans can create viable offspring with basically any sentient alien race so…..
Captain Kirk: boning alien babes for SCIENCE
That seems to be true in most fantasy (not that kind of fantasy, geez) as well as sci-fi.
Humanity’s real “hat”: not our “diversity” (usually just a mark of a writer too lazy to make other species with cultures as varied as ours), or “diplomacy”, or our crazy-Eddie never-give-up determination (per this comic), or even our “small talent for war.” It’s that we will **** anything, or at least give it a try.
It’s like she never even heard of Dolphins.
The rapists of the sea ~
Dolphins: The Evil Geniuses of the sea.
Whales: The beef of the sea.
Narwhals: The Jedi of the sea.
What part of freedom religion/belief/thought does she not understand?
If they can’t get along because of ONE indifference then they should just avoid each other its a big ass campus.
Don’t they live on the same floor? I went through a phase the semester I moved into the dorms of trying to avoid my floormates. (I have severe social anxiety, and the only reason I was in the dorms was because it was cheaper than an apartment and covered by my student aid – which apartments were not.) I quickly discovered avoiding my floormates meant showering, doing laundry and using the kitchen at 2 AM, and even then there was a chance of running into a drunk or the idiot who would shortly set off the fire alarm with middle-of-the-night popcorn.
Going to class on time, doing chores at a reasonable hour, and picking up my mail always meant having to chance an encounter with my floormates, their guests, and/or students from other floors/dorms. It was just a reality of dorm life I had to deal with. I don’t see why it wouldn’t be the same for Dina and Joyce.
That stripe of fundie usually, and sincerely, believes that means “freedom to not be persecuted for being a Christian.” Because there aren’t any other REAL religions, silly!
Their definition of ‘persecuted’ is pretty amusing too. Not exactly the same as being literally fed to lions.
I remember read about the Massachusetts Bay Colony, a Puritan theocracy, hanging three Quakers on Boston Common because they refused to conform to the Puritan church.
Well from Joyce’s perspective she was in the middle of a conversation/standoff, and Dina showed up and started talking about evolutionary advantages. So it’s less about Dina being free to hold that belief/thought and more about her injecting it, unsolicited, into a conversation. While Joyce was already dealing with Mike’s harassment. So it’s understandable for Joyce to be annoyed at the interruption.
For that matter, several of their few direct interactions turned into arguments about evolution. Now you and I know that Dina has trouble with social cues and dino/bio-facts are her default form of interaction, but to Joyce it may seem like Dina is aggressively bringing up their point of contention whenever possible. So telling her to knock it off is reasonable (especially, again, when she’s already short on patience thanks to Mike).
When I saw Dina appear my first thought was that she was going to draw dinosaurs on the whiteboard.
Anatomical diagrams of hypothetical reconstructed dino-dongs.
Beware the Whiteboard Cloaca Bandit!
“I let my guard down for a second – and he was waiting for it. Waiting until I was distracted.”
About the titletext… Given that a petard was actually an early shaped charge literally named “fart” in French, shouldn’t the reference picture be a butt instead?
Being hoisted by one’s own petard normally means being in the blast radius of your own explosive and sent flying by the concussion wave, but thanks to you I now have Wario’s flatulence-powered aerial propulsion in mind.
Petard: A small French bomb used to blow up gates and walls when breaching forts, originally from the 16th century.
Yes, the original meaning of “hoist by his own petard” literally meant what I just said: when someone’s being an idiot and failing to get out of the blast radius of their own petard before detonation, thereby being sent flying (hoist) by the explosion. It also is a figure of speech denoting an embarrassing backfire, similar to “gave him enough rope to himself with.”
Or did you mean to correct Reltzik? …because modern shaped charges can indeed be used for the same purpose as the petard, and the petard’s name really does also come from the french word for flatulence.
Do they still use petards these days or plastique plus detonator?
Petards were used as recently as WWII. Shaped charges essentially do the same thing now (direct and focus explosive forces), and many do use metal casings.
(BTW, Plas, noticed the new grav – Sal smiling really is great!)
More to the point, Willis got the phrase wrong. It’s a common enough mistake, but it bears repeating: one is hoist by one’s petard (meaning that your plans have blown up in your face spectacularly).
Normally I’d let this slide (I’m no Ultra Magnus when it comes to grammar or language conventions) but it seems most people don’t know what a “petard” is, and they assume it’s a flagpole of some sort. Plus the French fart jokes that inherent in the word origin are going unmentioned in this comic, and that’s a crime.
Do Transformers have fart jokes?
Only according to Michael Bay.
and rhinox
and cheetor
and you know what all of beast wars
What are these “Beast Wars” you speak of? Should anybody be worried about them? Cause I just finished fighting one four million year war, and I do not want to get into another one any time soon! Nope, it’s all quests for Swerve, here on out!
And yet you know about Michael Bay!
Michael Bay is a multiversal constant, like Unicron or Marrissa Faireborn. In one universe, Unicron is a metal planetoid, in another he’s trapped inside the Earth, and in a third he’s in the Dead Universe. (I think. “Chaos” was a pretty confusing storyline.) In one universe Faireborne’s a “Buck Rogers” type action-girl, in another she’s basically Nick Fury, and in a third… Kiss Players. I don’t think I need to elaborate on that, do I? 😉
Sorry, you’re both wrong: it’s with his own petard. The source is the 1604 Hamlet (1602) here.
Arrgh – that should be “(Q2)”.
Interesting. All this time I assumed it was a piece of clothing – probably a cod-piece like thing. The phrase doesn’t make much sense now that I know it’s a bomb – I get what they’re trying to say, but still.
Early firearms and explosive devices were not the most reliable things to be handling. In the case of the petard and similar devices, the petardier needed to get close to enemy fortifications (without getting shot), plant the petard, light the fuse, and run. If the fuse wasn’t long enough, the petardier would get caught by his own explosion. Hence the phrase, “hoist (into the air) by his own petard”, which means that you fell victim to your own plan. In this context, “hoist” means being hurled into the air (by an explosion).
“If we do happen to tread on a mine, sir, what do we do?”
“Normal procedure, Lieutenant, is to jump two hundred feet in the air and scatter oneself over a large area.”
— Blackadder
Right, I understand overall, it’s just weird for “hoist” to be used for being thrown into the air. Usually it’s for being, like, hung on something.
Semantic shift marches on.
Hoist means “to be lifted up”. An explosion will lift you up just as well as a pulley will, if someone more violently.
MUST RESIST SCREAMING AT IRRATIONAL FACTS
You are what you draw?
That’s just what God told us. It’s actually the horses that have Dominion.
“Ye who has the biggest dong has Dominion.”
Isn’t there actually a real bible verse about horse dongs being the best kind?
Willis, back me up here
Close:
“There she lusted after her lovers, whose genitals were like those of donkeys and whose emission was like that of horses.” – Ezekiel 23:20
Sounds like I know the title for your next Slipshine.
“Emissions were like that of horses” sounds like a great chapter name.
those bible guys really knew their way around a simile
There’s something in the Song of Solomon about the woman he loves having a belly like a heap of wheat, fenced about with lillies, IIRC. Musta been a chaser, that Solomon.
Also in the Song of Solomon is the woman speaking of sitting in the shade of her lover and tasting his fruit.
No, anyone who wants to spend the money can have Dominion … and all its expansions.
http://www.boardgamegeek.com/boardgame/36218/dominion
I WANT TO HAVE DOMINION!
And the religious vs evolutionary debates go on.
Silly people. They don’t realize it’s just Magic. HAH!
A debate would require more than one side being able to show proof of their ideas. Not just point to the same damn book every time
The best way to win a debate is to say that since definitions are subjective, your last statement proved my point.
Joyce if you’re going to Denny someone access to something there is only one way to do it :http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=V4UfAL9f74I
Buy them a Grand Slam Breakfast?
Dammit, Mike, don’t draw the same dick twice. That’s how she gets the proof it’s you who keeps doing it. 😐
I dont think he doesn’t cares.
Mike: ” I don’t care.”
And I was just proved right.
Damn fucked that up.
Having the “humans were created superior” mentality is a bit weird to be a part of the mainstream Christian mindset when you consider the whole original sin thing. I mean, it would be correct, but it’s more like “Humans were created superior and then we pissed it all away and fucked it up.” But of course, that would require listening to all of those Jesus lessons about humility, which mainstream Christianity has a distinct lack of today.
“The mainstream Christian mindset” has no interest whatsoever in being consistent. It’s more about taking a bunch of little tiny bits of convenient wish fulfillment (“humans are better than animals, so I can kill them”) (“saved Christians are better than the fallen heathens, so I can kill them”) (“We all have souls and thus I will live happily forever, so I can kill them”) and mashing them together in the most convenient, ego-stoking way possible. It’s got nothing whatsoever to do with making sense.
Joyce’s face in panel three looks just like her mother’s expression when she found out that Dorothy is a devil worshipper.
Uncanny.
At least Joyce lost the sweater vest and is dressing a bit more …modern?
As to Mike, he’s Mike. ‘Nuf said.
She could meet him halfway; Wanna draw a dick on my whiteboard? Then I get to kick you in the balls.
Seems fair enough to me.
Still not a foolproof plan. Mike could then draw a dick on her forehead or something and then just leave.
If Mike has driven Joyce to personally commit testicular trauma, he’s already won.
I’ve seen nothing to indicate that Joyce sees anything wrong with violence against heathens, so getting her to do so might not be much of a victory.
Violence against anyone who wrongs her; I seem to recall she punched Joe for ogling the waitress during their date.
Apparently God is more partial towards Mike and his penis jokes more than Joyce’s perseverance and gospel.
That is a god I can get behind
And apply a penis joke to.
Can this God create a penis joke so large that it hurts when you stick it in His pooper?
Thank you for giving us more Dina (a highly underused character). I would love to see more character development for her.
Dina got a minor thing wrong: the evolutionary advantage over other animals. As long as some humans survived, it wouldn’t matter if humans were more awesome or less than other species. What matters is that humans who had more patience were better at surviving and taking care of their offspring than humans with less patience, so that whatever combination of genes caused more patience spread through the population
Actually, there is evidence that our pre-hominid ancestors, after being driven out of the trees by the desertification of North Africa, found a niche as endurance hunters. Most of the animals in savanna Africa were locked in an evolutionary contest of speed, creating prey animals capable of short bursts of incredible speed, but wearing out after several minutes, and needing hours of rest to recover. Pre-humans evolved to pursue at lower speed, but over hours and days, exhausting sprinters. It’s why we are hairless, have an upright gait, and have comparatively large lung capacity.
Yes. My point was that evolutionary competition isn’t between species, but between individuals (or actually alleles) within a specie. The reason humans are endurance hunters is then not that humans won endurance races from their prey making them more fit than their prey, but that humans with larger endurance was on average more successful in getting food and thus surviving than other humans. If life is an obstacle course, the gazelles or whatever humans were hunting weren’t competitors: they were obstacles, just like the climate, predators, parasites, etc.
Eh, it’s both. Yes, other members of your species are often your top competitors — though with a co-operative species like humans, that can be pushed back to “humans of other tribes”. But there’s also competition between species in a niche. Gazelles weren’t our competitors, but other predators of gazelles were. Other hominids (now extinct, probably because of competition with the surviving humans), lions, wild dogs…
Dina’s also being simplistic in calling endurance ‘the’ competitive advantage, ignoring intelligence and language, stone tools, spears, fire, clothing and houses, traps, fishing nets, baskets… also a fair degree of toxin and physiological shock resistance compared to other animals.
Unrelatedly, Mike’s being a pure dick here. Not even “dick for your own enlightenment”.
This is definitely true. Especially since endurance hunting was itself limited in the prey you could select. And IIRC, it’s not as energy efficient as might otherwise be preferred.
Plus, gathering was waaaay the hell more a thing than most people realize.
Gathering would be vital. Sure, you may have to fight your way past thorns and climb trees, but at least fruit and berries stay still. Very energy efficient. And nutritious. And delicious.
I think the point is more that, pre-sophisticated tools, early Hominids would likely have died or at least been more restricted in their expansion if they didn’t have Stamina; We’re very far from the fastest or strongest animals, being able to (in general as a species) outlast and keep going where other animals are tired as fuck is probably why we expanded so far.
Also, Humans specifically evolved to throw things. No other animal can throw with the precision that humans can.
I think that is a great characterization point for Dina. She does not get every little fact about evolution right, but her self image says that she does. Scientific facts are not changing and strange like people – they are frozen in amber for her to study and understand (I think that was about how she put it).
That’s a great mindset for getting interested in science, but it is less stellar when it comes to truly understand science, including how all theories are biased by the same human shortcomings Dina has such a hard time understanding. In educational theory it is sometimes called a dualist viewpoint, the perspective that something is either true or false. With greater understanding of the subject the viewpoint becomes more nuanced.
And it makes perfect sense that Dina clings to her incomplete (but to be fair – impressive for her age) understanding of evolution as FACTS rather than current understanding. She is not a walking biological dictionary, she is a person who uses her passion for evolution to define her identity.
This. Humans and hominids have a slough of adaptations contributing to and arising from our upright stature, including a very old one: the ability to throw a rock fast. A normal modern human male can easily throw a fist-size rock at a moving target at 70+ MPH (120 k/hr., for those of you who think in real units). We have specialized ligament structures in our shoulders to support this behavior — and we use it to throw rocks, spears, and other lethal projectiles.
Our great toes are not opposed — our species has sacrificed the ability to use our feet as manipulators for the ability to run long distances with an efficient gate.
I could go on for a long time, listing unique human and hominid adaptations which have nothing to do with ‘patience,’ yet which I could argue contributed as much, if not more, to the survival of a particular and not-terribly-interesting clade within the clade of the great apes.
Oh, Joyce…I can’t decide if the fact you didn’t see this coming is adorable or just unbelievably sad.
What I love is Dina’s tiny smile in the last panel. She did not show up to debate the merits of evolution; she wanted this result. Dina’s carrying a touch of a grudge.
I.. don’t see it?
“Your failure to adapt to your circumstances due to your stubbornness weakens your position and strengthens my own.”
You know, if this was where I lived Joyce would have a constant small crowd around her giggling at every little thing she said in regards to religion.
I haven’t even seen anyone so religious in real life.
On the bus to work this morning, there was a lady who wouldn’t stop talking behind me.
She had a lovely voice and all, but she was preaching about the 6,000-year-old earth, and the accelerating spiral of evil that the world is on, and that Science doesn’t know why cells stop dividing. Her audience was a similar-aged young lady with a thick accent, and who was rather receptive to the preaching.
This wasn’t somewhere out in the boondocks. This is in Manhattan and it makes me sad.
I have. Unfortunately its my sister.
Consider yourself lucky.
I have, quite a lot of them since I went to a Jesuit high school, that being said, they weren’t the priests but the kids who everyone avoided for that reason
EVOLUTION MAKES ME FEEL LIKE GOD MIGHT NOT EXIST SO ITS CLEARLY WRONG BECAUSE THE IDEA OF A GODLESS UNIVERSE SCARES ME!!!
There, I just summed up the entire reason why mainstream christianity thinks evolution is false. Because willfull ignorance is better than having to deal with unpleasant truths.
The weirdest thing to me is the fact that evolution is easily observable in everyday life. Siblings looking similar, different people from different countries looking different, dogs being bred in thousands of different breeds that look like completely different animals… and so on.
And really… Evolution doesn’t even voids god’s existence, really. If anything, from my atheist point of view, it just makes his creation (if there IS a god), much more awesome.
If even the friggin Catholic Church considers evolution viable, it always seemed odd to me to see all these shitty little backwoods American churches so obsessively cling to literal interpretations of Genesis. I dont know what it is about American evangelism that breeds these people.
America was founded mostly by Protestants, who historically hated the Catholics. Anything the Pope or Catholic church says, the Protestants will instinctively want to do the opposite. (Joyce is Protestant.)
Thing I realized today: C is for Catholic and P is for Protestant. C is for Coke and P is for Pepsi. COINCIDENCE? …yeah, probably.
Since the Lutherans and other various Protestant denominations split off of Roman Catholicism over disagreements about theology or practice, shouldn’t the word more properly be pronounced as ‘Pro-TESS-tant’?
Only if we can get people to pronounce “In-FAME-ous” or “KILometer.”
In fact, the “frigging Catholic church” mains that Darwinian evolution is *true*. The question which Bishop Ratzinger — sorry, Pope Benedict, my bad — raised was whether God intervened directly to give humans a soul. At the same time affirmed that evolution through random selection of the fittest was the orthodox doctrine of the catholic church.
Evolution doesn’t even voids god’s existence, really. If anything, from my atheist point of view, it just makes his creation (if there IS a god), much more awesome.
Amen to that! 😛
Take the story of the microscopic little blobs of chemicals that found out how to make copies of themselves. Of how the world tried everything it could – volcanic eruptions, global glaciation, meteor strikes – to wipe the little blobs out of existence, but how they always found new ways to survive and thrive. Of how they diversified and started cooperating to gain new abilities, and how they combined into larger entities, some of which were vaguely aware of their own existence. How they conquered the oceans, the lands, the skies, constantly coming up with better ways to do what they did, without ever even realizing how awesome they were.
Until when, after being awesome for billions of years, the tiny little blobs came up with a type of being that was able to appreciate the awesomeness of itself and everything that came before it.
Take that story… versus “A wizard did it!”
Why would anyone prefer the latter?
ah, but (as we see here) that story doesn’t make us sufficiently special and unique and superior and different from all the other things-made-out-of-blobs all around us.
It more or less boils down to “its complicated so God just poofed everything into existance in its current form, regardless of what fossil records show.”
I wouldn’t say mainstream. Maybe where you live (I’m guessing North America), but not where I live. Although it is convenient to have a load of gaps for God to fill, I think that a lot of people can ponder the hard issues and come out with a deeper and more meaningful faith.
But that’s hard, and people are lazy. Much easier to just deny it loudly.
I’m not American at all, I’m from Sweden, so my view is more or less an outsider observing things.
MR. WILLIS ARE YOU A RUNNER?!
Mike has proven that Joyce can’t stop him from defacing her door. She liked her door decorations. They were an expression of her own unique self and her willingness to reach out to other people. Mike has just ruined that for her. Joyce wishes in terms of door decoration comes second to Mike’s.
She might pull down the whiteboard now, and hopefully that would end the harassement. But no guarantee. Maybe Mike decides to doodle a dick on the nametags as well, or on the portrait. Or maybe slip a few drawings of dicks in her backpack. Why not post a few drawings of dicks on her facebook and twitter? Mike is a bully who gets off on making people uncomfortable, so what’s there to stop him?
It’s all innocent, right? It’s just a few drawings of dicks, not even photos. Don’t mind the fact that for Joyce they are symbols for a sexuality she fears and sees as a threat to her morals and values and sense of identity. Don’t mind that she has expressed the clear wish to not be exposed to more dick drawings and that every new example is a clear violation of her wishes.
You see, Joyce, whether or not you want to see a dick is not as important as whether or not someone else wants to show you a dick.
You have a point. But you also have to see my point. That Joyce is whiny and annoying, and her misery pleases me.
In universe: This is bullying, it is bad for Joyce.
Out of universe: This is drama, it is good for the story.
In universe: Walk past and pretend not to notice
Out of universe: cheer Mike on
Same here. =D
The next chapter is named “The Whiteboard Ding-Dong Bandit,” isn’t it? The whiteboard dickery will probably persist for a bit.
Not really looking forward to the chapter after that, though — “When Somebody Loved Me”. I’m already picking up all sorts of negative vibes and deep, sad feels just from the title itself.
oh God, that song.
I’m tearing up just thinking about it.
“She might pull down the whiteboard now, and hopefully that would end the harassement. But no guarantee. Maybe Mike decides to doodle a dick on the nametags as well, or on the portrait. Or maybe slip a few drawings of dicks in her backpack. Why not post a few drawings of dicks on her facebook and twitter? Mike is a bully who gets off on making people uncomfortable, so what’s there to stop him?”
You really dislike Mike, which is fair: He’s a jerk. This characterization though is less than fair; He likes cutting people down to size, poking at particular bits of what he characterizes as poor logic. This is somewhere between jackass and bully, yeah, but he doesn’t lord himself over people and plot to destroy people based off their weaknesses. If you think Mike is that bad, you might reread his strips and ideally Shortpacked.
“It’s all innocent, right? It’s just a few drawings of dicks, not even photos. Don’t mind the fact that for Joyce they are symbols for a sexuality she fears and sees as a threat to her morals and values and sense of identity.”
Honestly? To Joyce, from what I’ve seen, this seems more like something inappropriate and juvenile. She’s not freaking out or feeling awful, just pissed off that Mike is a jerk.
“Don’t mind that she has expressed the clear wish to not be exposed to more dick drawings and that every new example is a clear violation of her wishes”
People are naturally belligerant. You tell people they can’t do something they see as harmless/arbitrary and someone will do it. It’s bad when someone gets hurt from it.
Joyce isn’t haunted by Endless cartoon representations of dicks, Mike isn’t dedicated to destroying her by praying on her confused views on sexuality. This is sort of a jerk move, continuing to do it would definitely be worth bringing up with an RA. Considering Mike though? This is a one time thing to bother someone and he won’t return to it again unless Joyce explicitly challenges him in some way.
It may take hours…it may take days…it might even take weeks…but Mike WILL draw a dick on your whiteboard.
It’s not a question of “if” – it’s a question of “when”.
If you build it, they will come
To draw dicks on it, mostly
They are kind of jerks
*Reads comic.
*Clicks comment balloon.
*”Ctrl-F”
*”S-T-R-A-W” …0 matches found
*Silently high fives self in headspace
Taken literally, “high-fiving oneself in the headspace” sounds like a facepalm, which is probably the opposite of what your meant
My mental image was more like that head-smashing gif from Story of Rikki-Oh, but self-inflicted.
Willis, I know the storyline for this comic has been set in a realtively-hard-to-change substance for several years, now, but this coincidence is too great to ignore.
Is there some sort of correlation between the current (and upcoming) storyline about dong-drawing in your comic, and obsessive dong-drawer Joel Watson’s current storyline in Hijinks Ensue, where he’s obsessively milking you for information about how to create substantial characters? Is there some sort of code, here? Is there a secret conversation encoded in your comics, a dialog between two great artists buried in dick jokes?
Sometimes you’ve got to choose your battles because people are literally coming at you from two directions.
Thats it, i officially hate Joyce
Undortunately for you Joyce, Mike was created superior to all.
Um, no.
Dina’s view is not mainstream, and it’s probably wrong. First, “patience” is not a trait which can evolve; it’s far too abstract. Even it were, however, that’s among the least of the traits which make us deadly predators and scavengers: you can credit upright posture, exceptional neoteny, brain growth consequent to neoteny, adaptation to missile throwing to minimize the effects of neoteny, lighter jaw, etc. long before you can credit “patience”.
She didn’t say patience, she said stamina. Traits like upright walking and the ability to sweat (as opposed to stopping to pant) helped prehistoric humans pursue prey to the point of its exhaustion
If only Dina had actually said “patience”!
i mean “stamina” is only the actual title of today’s strip
and thanks to diana mike wins the battle over being able to draw on her white board a certain body part that has her up in arms. round one mike.
I, uh, I just read this entire thing from start to now in a single sitting. I, uh, I think I may also find myself misplacing $40+ sometime soon.
PINGAS!
PINGAS!
PINGAS!
PINGAS!
PINGAS!
PINGAS!
PINGAS!
Joyce saying “genitalia.” So adorably clinical. 😀
Some of us, in other words not including most people I know
I had a dream last night of Joyce (thanks for finally making me dream about comic strips!), and I was thinking about this one when I woke up.
It occurred to me that, as many problems as she’s having at the moment with unrequited lusting after Ethan, that Mike could seriously mess up a lot of things in Joyce’s life right now by kissing her and doing it well.
Although, I guess it’d be a fifty-fifty… it’d mess everything up because she enjoyed it, or she’d just blow her top.
I figure it’d have to be Mike, as nobody else would want to ruin things for her. XD
It’s interesting how Joyce is literally being hand-fed relatively simple (even if implied) information about how to understand what evolution is, yet continues to brush it aside like it’s some hyper-analytical pier-reviewed article discussing the entire evolutionary timeline.