I should print out that scary “Joyce waking up Sarah” pic and paste it on the ceiling over my bed. When the alarm goes off, I won’t be all “Five more minutes”, I’ll shriek and spring out of bed.
Use a timer switch on a tube valve radio tuned to any music station, positioned out of reach, turned to max volume.
There is a two second window from you waking up to realizing what’s up, and another two seconds before the radio explodes and the appartment collapses.
Don’t go back to bed once you are standing shivering next to the radio with pulse racing.
Wouldn’t work for me either. My alarm clock is waaaaaay across the room from my bed already. And I can still get out of bed, walk across the room, turn off my alarm as it’s playing VERY loudly, walk back across the room, get back into the bed, and never once at any point in that whole set of actions actually need to wake up.
I’m a pretty high-functioning sleepwalker. xD Also sleeptalker. xD
I’ve only done this a couple of times. (It’s also why I have *two* loud alarm clocks placed at different far points in the room, set two snoozes apart.)
By the way, if you’re a high functioning sleepwalker and sleeptalker, why bother waking up at all? At least, not until after work is over or whatever.
It doesn’t matter, I’ve tried having 2 alarm clocks in opposite corners of the room set 10 minutes apart or whatever…I still ended up getting disciplined at my last job for turning up late to work. My boss just didn’t believe that anybody could actually turn walk over and turn off an alarm without being awake. He just assumed I was making up a load of bull to try to avoid a black mark in my employee record (if I had been making shit up, I would’ve gone for something more instantly believable! :P)
I’ve done it loads of times over the years. I’ll set my alarm for, say, 9am, then wake up 11am to find my alarm re-set to 10am and switched off already (meaning I must’ve got up at least twice without waking up). And I’m such a good sleeptalker apparently that my sister used to engage me in long conversations while I was asleep, of which I remember nothing. Also this was also how once, on a Scout camp, I revealed to all the other boys in my tent exactly which girl Scout I had a massive crush on. Really embarrassing… xD
I wouldn’t like to try going to work for the day whilst asleep, I might not be high-functioning *enough*… 😛
In college, I had my computer, which was underneath my bunk, much like the arrangement they’ve got in the DoA dorm, set up as my alarm clock. This was back in the day before MP3s, so it would just do a repeated PC-speaker beep. Any key on the keyboard would work as a snooze button, for 15 minutes the first time, 10 minutes the second time, 5 minutes the third, and then not at all. Shutting it off required typing a 50+-character passphrase with capitalization and punctuation flawlessly – the backspace and other editing keys were disabled, as were ^C and similar interrupts – and this upside-down while hanging over the edge of my bunk.
I shut it off without waking up several times.
These days I just use my stereo, with my phone alarm set as a backup about fifteen minutes later. I find I wake up a lot better if I wake gradually to music than if I’m jolted awake by an alarm – and actually faster, because I don’t spend half an hour swearing and slapping the snooze button and trying to get back to sleep. And it’s safer… I tend to be irrationally violent when woken badly.
No. Just no. There’s a distinct difference between “fashionable” and “tasteful”. and the phrase “fashion sense” strikes me as implying the latter rather than the former.
It’s all downhill from here Joyce… first you got the shirt and hat, now the legs… you’re one step closer to officially having joined the cult of the monkey. One can only imagine what your parents and Bible school friends will say when they find out.
It could have been worse though, you could have joined the cult of the goat.
They are great for riding a bike! They stay out of the chain and keep the flying gravel and bits of glass on the road from getting tossed into your legs. Also the pockets will carry ID and a few folded bills and some keys. I used to wear them before all the hipsters, then I stopped because I didn’t want to be conflated with that group. I think in another year I can start wearing mine again.
It was probably meant to be a parody of the 1957 movie “I Was a Teenage Werewolf”. It’s just well known enough for Harry Potter tribute bands to write songs about it, apparently.
Her name is Noel,
I have a dream about her.
She rings my bell.
We’ve got Sunday’s class in half an hour
Oh, how she rocks.
In that vest and tube socks
But she doesn’t know who I am.
And she prays for “all others” when she means me/
‘Cause I’m just a teenage Churchmouse, honey.
Yeah, I’m just a teenage Churchmouse, honey.
Listened to Iron Mary baby.
Her boyfriends in choir.
And he sings all around the school.
And h’d simply kick
my butt if he knew the truth
He lives on my block
and he drives an IROC
But he doesn’t know who I am.
And he truly doesn’t give a damn about me.
‘Cause I’m just a teenage churchmouse, honey.
Yes, I’m just a teenage churchmouse, honey.
Listen to Iron Mary, maybe with me.
Oh, yeah, churchmouse, no, she doesn’t know what she’s missing.
Oh, yeah, churchmouse, no, she doesn’t know what she’s missing.
Man, I feel so old.
It’s Easter and I am lonely.
Praise be and behold.
She’s walking over to me.
This must be fate.
My lips start to quake.
How does she know who I am?
And does she see a boy or a man?
I’ve got two tickets to Iron Mary, baby.
Come with me Friday, don’t say “maybe”
I’m just a teenage churchmouse baby, like you.
OOOOOooooooOOOOoooOOoo.
Oh, yeah, churchmouse, she doesn’t know what she’s missing.
Oh, yeah, churchmouse, she didn’t know what she was missing.
Sierra has a better since of fashion than her and she doesn’t where shows! Than again to be fair most of the females have on DoA have dont really have good taist. Joyce and Dorothy are always wearing sweater vest, Sarah looks like mother teresa and Amber as much as I like her do I haft to get started on someone who runs around as a bright yellow batman…thinking about it was that the best color scheme for a hero who goes out at night to fight crime
Well, it ain’t no Riley eating cereal, but hell, I’ll take any opportunity the comic offers to decompress I can get. So WHEW adorably oblivious Joyce and deadpan snarky Sarah!
I like how she bought her a tank top but like Sarah wears tank tops a lot, one in that color, and she’s actually wearing a tank top in this strip.
Also, Joyce, I hope you got a monkey master scarf while you were there.
And this is the storyline where Willis opens fire and empties the shot locker against his fundy religious upbringing, and by inference, religion in general. Time for me to maybe go walkaround.
As someone who went to a religious college which had a leggings war last year, it’s kind of weird to me that Joyce is not all “leggings are the work of sinful devils.” On the other hand, it’s not nice to see her every now and then actually having her own occasionally non-standard opinions.
My prediction for this storyline:
Joyce decides that since Dorothy/Walky introduced her to Monkey Master and Dexter, it’s only right that she introduces them to her favorite cartoon as a child, Hymmel the Humming Hymnal. However, when Dorothy watches it, she gets uncomfortable due to its views on atheists or whatever else that the fundie cartoon promotes. And then inner conflict for Joyce! Hilarity ensues.
I doubt it. In my admittedly anecdotal experience, insanely-religious people are incapable of feeling inner conflict over atheits feeling discomfort, because while religious folk may feel uneasy over atheistic content (because it is evil and discomforting and wrong), the concept of atheists feeling uneasy over religious themes isn’t credible. After all, they don’t believe in anything, so how can they be bothered?
I think my new rule of thumb is do not read a comic that has around 400 comments about it in the afternoon if I am feeling fragile in the feels. As this comic has less than 150 I am clearly safe.
OHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGOD!!!!!!! THEORY!!! I HAS A THEORY!!! Anyone remember this comic? http://www.dumbingofage.com/2013/comic/book-3/03-answers-in-hennessy/curiosity/
The title of this new chapter… Sarah wearing provocative clothing… Joyce being attracted to Billie’s ginormous knockers in the aforementioned comic… DON’T YOU SEE? THIS IS IT!!! Gentlemen, the ships are coming into port!
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Dina’s hat is ‘naggy’ hat, shes an EQ fan – gotta be.
That awkward moment when you see someone outside of EQ who even knows about it.
lots of people know about shards of dalaya
bestest gamezor in tha hoodz?
maybe, check it out
yeah, I know what it is, just asking stoopid questions. 🙂
I’m intrigued to see what chaos will inevitably occur.
Joyce! Showing fashion sense (sorta).
I’m just shocked that she’s not *wearing* a sweater vest!
I think she’s still in her pjs, which include a t-shirt
Oh! It was too good to be true…
Have hope! I’m pretty sure this is the day everyone wears hoodie dresses.
Actually, “The Day Everyone Wore Hoodie Dresses” would make a pretty good title.
There are pyjama jeans, why not pyjama sweater vests? This is a travesty!
I was gonna say.. how is a tank top fashion sense? Or provocative? D:
hey, nobody said she *didn’t* come home with five new sweater vests and a picture bible
She also bought an album featuring the best Christian songs of the 90s.
WITH ARMS WIDE OOOOPEN
Not to be confused with: “So here I am, with open arms . . . “
That’s a Journey song from the ’70s…
No.
how bout no.
Yea, all two of them.
I should print out that scary “Joyce waking up Sarah” pic and paste it on the ceiling over my bed. When the alarm goes off, I won’t be all “Five more minutes”, I’ll shriek and spring out of bed.
DO YOU WANT TO DIE?! THINK OF THE KIDS MANE!!
Won’t work for me. I don’t open my eyes until I’m standing on two feet, past the point of no return.
Won’t work for me either….go with the zombie for the K-Fee Coffee commercial.
Won’t work for me, as I wear a sleeping mask to keep the sun out of my eyes. Also I tend to wake up before the alarm anyways.
Use a timer switch on a tube valve radio tuned to any music station, positioned out of reach, turned to max volume.
There is a two second window from you waking up to realizing what’s up, and another two seconds before the radio explodes and the appartment collapses.
Don’t go back to bed once you are standing shivering next to the radio with pulse racing.
Wouldn’t work for me either. My alarm clock is waaaaaay across the room from my bed already. And I can still get out of bed, walk across the room, turn off my alarm as it’s playing VERY loudly, walk back across the room, get back into the bed, and never once at any point in that whole set of actions actually need to wake up.
I’m a pretty high-functioning sleepwalker. xD Also sleeptalker. xD
Oh good, it’s not just me.
Me too!
I’ve only done this a couple of times. (It’s also why I have *two* loud alarm clocks placed at different far points in the room, set two snoozes apart.)
By the way, if you’re a high functioning sleepwalker and sleeptalker, why bother waking up at all? At least, not until after work is over or whatever.
I do this too. My alarm goes off as 7, my phone at 7:30.
With any luck, walking across the room will wake me just enough that the phone will do the trick a half hour later.
It doesn’t matter, I’ve tried having 2 alarm clocks in opposite corners of the room set 10 minutes apart or whatever…I still ended up getting disciplined at my last job for turning up late to work. My boss just didn’t believe that anybody could actually turn walk over and turn off an alarm without being awake. He just assumed I was making up a load of bull to try to avoid a black mark in my employee record (if I had been making shit up, I would’ve gone for something more instantly believable! :P)
I’ve done it loads of times over the years. I’ll set my alarm for, say, 9am, then wake up 11am to find my alarm re-set to 10am and switched off already (meaning I must’ve got up at least twice without waking up). And I’m such a good sleeptalker apparently that my sister used to engage me in long conversations while I was asleep, of which I remember nothing. Also this was also how once, on a Scout camp, I revealed to all the other boys in my tent exactly which girl Scout I had a massive crush on. Really embarrassing… xD
I wouldn’t like to try going to work for the day whilst asleep, I might not be high-functioning *enough*… 😛
In college, I had my computer, which was underneath my bunk, much like the arrangement they’ve got in the DoA dorm, set up as my alarm clock. This was back in the day before MP3s, so it would just do a repeated PC-speaker beep. Any key on the keyboard would work as a snooze button, for 15 minutes the first time, 10 minutes the second time, 5 minutes the third, and then not at all. Shutting it off required typing a 50+-character passphrase with capitalization and punctuation flawlessly – the backspace and other editing keys were disabled, as were ^C and similar interrupts – and this upside-down while hanging over the edge of my bunk.
I shut it off without waking up several times.
These days I just use my stereo, with my phone alarm set as a backup about fifteen minutes later. I find I wake up a lot better if I wake gradually to music than if I’m jolted awake by an alarm – and actually faster, because I don’t spend half an hour swearing and slapping the snooze button and trying to get back to sleep. And it’s safer… I tend to be irrationally violent when woken badly.
Question for Willis, was there a timeskip, or is this just the next day? If there was, how long was it?
It’s just the next day. All my timeskips have been marked.
Joyce is wasting no time on her plan to get Sarah and Jacob together. Sublimate much, Joyce?
Really? Never noticed they were marked…
Here are both of them:
http://www.dumbingofage.com/2012/comic/book-2/04-time-keeps-on-slippin/year/
http://www.dumbingofage.com/2013/comic/book-3/03-answers-in-hennessy/too-long/
Six whole days gone in a flash. That’s about a year of DOA time. I’m glad you didn’t draw Walky waiting pensively for your days.
There is a time skip of several hours involved.
It will be filled retroactively with dream flashbacks.
Dexter and monkey master leggings in the same sentence with…..fashion sense…ah yeah.
Well, at least this is better than that episode, “fashion disaster”
Cartoon-patterend leggings aren’t really that unfashionable these days, depending on what you wear them with. Recent example: http://style.mtv.com/2014/01/28/teen-wolf-seaon-3-episode-16-leggings/
No. Just no. There’s a distinct difference between “fashionable” and “tasteful”. and the phrase “fashion sense” strikes me as implying the latter rather than the former.
I like Joyce’s 4th panel angry “The Monarch” eyebrows.
Now Wear the tanktop so we can destroy Dr. Venture!!!
You know, I bet Joyce looves butterflies..
Last two days lasted eight months. I’m guessing this day will last a full year.
Nah, only until May.
(Already finished writing it.)
Maybe Joyce will finally go nuts in this story arc.
Could you honestly tell the difference if she did?
She’d denounce sweatervests.
She’d try to make out with Sarah.
She’ll dry-hump squirrels in the park.
Nahh, that would fall under the “Pre-Marital Hanky Panky!” crazy ban she is already operating under.
And here come the hoodie dresses.
HOODIE DRESSES FOR EVERYONE!
Maybe Joyce bought Sarah a hoodie dress at Target. We can only hope.
New storyline, but Joyce couldn’t go two panels before snapping back to her triangle smile.
It’s terrifying.
RETURN OF THE TRIANGLE SMILE. \(o0o/)
The very fact that you wear sweater vests shows that you have no sense of fashion, Joyce!
Hey, did you not watch Fairly Odd Parents? Sweatervests are girl magnets.
Yes..even when women wear them.
Especially when women wear them.
That is the best Gravatar for these comments. >_>
It’s all downhill from here Joyce… first you got the shirt and hat, now the legs… you’re one step closer to officially having joined the cult of the monkey. One can only imagine what your parents and Bible school friends will say when they find out.
It could have been worse though, you could have joined the cult of the goat.
Or the Cult of the Dead Cow.
That ship done sailed already. The hand and Tim missed it though.
Now *that* was a reference that I had to think about for a few seconds.
“I mean, I DID come home with those, but that’s beside the point.”
Exactly.
Ah the tank top that’s gonna be layered over a t-shirt soon…
Yeah….
Joyce’s Dexter Leggings vs Walky’s Pajama Jeans. Who wins?
Pajama jeans. Never fail.
Neither. Both get clothes-married and have legging-PJ jeans babies.
Jeggings?
Meggings, leggings with pockets for men (it’s a thing! I totally saw them on the Internet.)
I really thought meggings and to be a load of bull, and then I consulted the internet. I… I just don’t know what I’m feeling right now.
They are great for riding a bike! They stay out of the chain and keep the flying gravel and bits of glass on the road from getting tossed into your legs. Also the pockets will carry ID and a few folded bills and some keys. I used to wear them before all the hipsters, then I stopped because I didn’t want to be conflated with that group. I think in another year I can start wearing mine again.
Watch your back Rachel Zoe ’cause Joyce Brown is the new name in fashion!
Things are finally looking happier! *keeps guard up*
And thus, Sarah was spared from seeing the One with the Triangle Smile that day.
Poor Joyce. It’s only a matter of time before you get attacked as not being a “real” Dexter and Monkey Master fan.
But she bought the hoodie! That makes her a TruFan!
I think she can get away with it, since it’s a kid’s cartoon (Even if it’s a kids cartoon for boys).
…I haven’t missed an episode of bronies saying that about girls/women, have I?
So many.
As one myself, I can say, yeah, it happens. More often than it really should. (Though, to be fair, once is already more often than it should happen)
Sensitive Scanner?
Next thing you know she’ll be wearing one of those hoodie dresses.
I am ECSTATIC for the future hoodie dresses.
GUYS! Family weekend of horrific pain and trauma is finally over!
Horrific pain being that Blaine got his ass kicked from pillar to post.
Yeah, I think that might stick with him for several days, at least.
Family weekend is over. I’m sure the pain and trauma will continue. That’s how Willis rolls.
Yup…let the good times roll.
But it won’t be so concentrated.
I almost competely forgot about Joyce. She just got eclipsed by more angsty people.
Besides her relationship with Ethan nothing much else is going on for her is it?
I wish MY roomate would buy me free clothes! Also that they existed and I wasn’t living with my mom like a dingus.
That odd stain on the ceiling? Bam! Dingus-pointed.
Everyone knows that Dexter and Monkey Man pants are the height of fashion. It would go great with the tank top!
Hey, don’t diss the sweater vest. They are cool.
Agreed. I just wish I didn’t have a gut like a beer barrel so I could still wear one and look halfway good.
Man, every time Joyce looks angry I just want to give her a pat on the head and a ribbon that says “You tried!”
Joyce is one of those people who is scarier when she smiles than when she makes an angry face.
Her smile is a void into which no man can escape.
Oh, you can escape into it no problem; it’s escaping out of it that’s impossible.
Depends on whether her eyes have gone red, and whether she’s physically attacking somebody or not.
Is the tittle supposed to be a parody of “I was a teenage werewolf” by The Remus Lupins?
It was probably meant to be a parody of the 1957 movie “I Was a Teenage Werewolf”. It’s just well known enough for Harry Potter tribute bands to write songs about it, apparently.
Her name is Noel,
I have a dream about her.
She rings my bell.
We’ve got Sunday’s class in half an hour
Oh, how she rocks.
In that vest and tube socks
But she doesn’t know who I am.
And she prays for “all others” when she means me/
‘Cause I’m just a teenage Churchmouse, honey.
Yeah, I’m just a teenage Churchmouse, honey.
Listened to Iron Mary baby.
Her boyfriends in choir.
And he sings all around the school.
And h’d simply kick
my butt if he knew the truth
He lives on my block
and he drives an IROC
But he doesn’t know who I am.
And he truly doesn’t give a damn about me.
‘Cause I’m just a teenage churchmouse, honey.
Yes, I’m just a teenage churchmouse, honey.
Listen to Iron Mary, maybe with me.
Oh, yeah, churchmouse, no, she doesn’t know what she’s missing.
Oh, yeah, churchmouse, no, she doesn’t know what she’s missing.
Man, I feel so old.
It’s Easter and I am lonely.
Praise be and behold.
She’s walking over to me.
This must be fate.
My lips start to quake.
How does she know who I am?
And does she see a boy or a man?
I’ve got two tickets to Iron Mary, baby.
Come with me Friday, don’t say “maybe”
I’m just a teenage churchmouse baby, like you.
OOOOOooooooOOOOoooOOoo.
Oh, yeah, churchmouse, she doesn’t know what she’s missing.
Oh, yeah, churchmouse, she didn’t know what she was missing.
Sierra has a better since of fashion than her and she doesn’t where shows! Than again to be fair most of the females have on DoA have dont really have good taist. Joyce and Dorothy are always wearing sweater vest, Sarah looks like mother teresa and Amber as much as I like her do I haft to get started on someone who runs around as a bright yellow batman…thinking about it was that the best color scheme for a hero who goes out at night to fight crime
I got excited cuz I saw the name Sierra. Still not 100% what I read.
Friends don’t let friends drink and comment.
Well, it ain’t no Riley eating cereal, but hell, I’ll take any opportunity the comic offers to decompress I can get. So WHEW adorably oblivious Joyce and deadpan snarky Sarah!
Dexter and Monkey Master must be pretty popular if you can buy themed leggings for them at Target. Or whatever chain Joyce went to.
The probable intro theme to this season after last story’s arc:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U0BUA4ubvFI
Dexter and Monkey Master leggings? Too sexy!
You all should listen to Packy, here.
He knows what’s sexy.
Yeah, but Joyce already turned him down 10 or 12 years ago…
…but that one was the Walkyverse Joyce. Packy! You might have a second chance here!
“I was a Teenage Churchmouse??”
That wouldn’t be “Chastity Churchmouse,” would it?
All I can think is that in another universe walky is hitting that…..sploosh…
I thought your name was Carol?
Joyce, darling…
How do you even KNOW what’s provocative is? Unless… you eye-wandered again, did you!?
I love Sarah’s deadpan face so much.
Man, I was just thinking today at work, “you know, I miss Joyce” and then I get back home and BAM! There she is being weird. Thanks Willis 🙂
I would buy those and wear them with a long navy blue blouse and white belt
http://thedalekprophet.4umer.com/t43-good-webcomics-and-some-awesome-links#50
You got featured on a friend’s blog yesterday.
Holy cow, after two massive drama bombs I forgot this storyline even existed. Looking forward to it.
Amber’s arc’s been more of a drama MIRV than a mere bomb.
I like how she bought her a tank top but like Sarah wears tank tops a lot, one in that color, and she’s actually wearing a tank top in this strip.
Also, Joyce, I hope you got a monkey master scarf while you were there.
And this is the storyline where Willis opens fire and empties the shot locker against his fundy religious upbringing, and by inference, religion in general. Time for me to maybe go walkaround.
As someone who went to a religious college which had a leggings war last year, it’s kind of weird to me that Joyce is not all “leggings are the work of sinful devils.” On the other hand, it’s not nice to see her every now and then actually having her own occasionally non-standard opinions.
Sensitive Scanner! Barely visible, but Sensitive Scanner! ^_^
Also, adorable lip-biting happy Joyce face!
Sensitive Scanner! ^_^
My prediction for this storyline:
Joyce decides that since Dorothy/Walky introduced her to Monkey Master and Dexter, it’s only right that she introduces them to her favorite cartoon as a child, Hymmel the Humming Hymnal. However, when Dorothy watches it, she gets uncomfortable due to its views on atheists or whatever else that the fundie cartoon promotes. And then inner conflict for Joyce! Hilarity ensues.
I doubt it. In my admittedly anecdotal experience, insanely-religious people are incapable of feeling inner conflict over atheits feeling discomfort, because while religious folk may feel uneasy over atheistic content (because it is evil and discomforting and wrong), the concept of atheists feeling uneasy over religious themes isn’t credible. After all, they don’t believe in anything, so how can they be bothered?
Poor Joyce; even when she’s irate it just makes her more adorable.
If I never hit the Previous button, I can continue to act like the end of Chapter 1 didn’t happen…
You want to pretend that Dina didn’t learn “sympathy contact” and Amber smiled QUESTION MARK?
Man, you can see Sarah really wanted those leggings.
I think my new rule of thumb is do not read a comic that has around 400 comments about it in the afternoon if I am feeling fragile in the feels. As this comic has less than 150 I am clearly safe.
OHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGOD!!!!!!! THEORY!!! I HAS A THEORY!!! Anyone remember this comic? http://www.dumbingofage.com/2013/comic/book-3/03-answers-in-hennessy/curiosity/
The title of this new chapter… Sarah wearing provocative clothing… Joyce being attracted to Billie’s ginormous knockers in the aforementioned comic… DON’T YOU SEE? THIS IS IT!!! Gentlemen, the ships are coming into port!
Joyce is ADORBS
OMG Dat sarcasm. I can practically hear her Daria-esque wit leaping off the page.