WITH TOYS AND PIZZA HE WILL COME TO DOMINATE THE MARKET OF THE YOUTH. THEY WILL DO HIS BIDDING, THEY WILL MARCH IN HIS LOCKSTEP WHEN THEY COME TO POWER. GALASSO IS PATIENT. WHEN THE TIME IS RIGHT HE WILL STEP OUT FROM BEHIND THE SHADOWS AND REVEAL HIMSELF AS THE TRUE POWER ON EARTH.
My theory is that all the Galasso’s in the Walky Multiverses are working together. Each will dominate a specific niche in their designated reality. Then, when the time comes, they will collapse all the possibilities into one, one where GALASSO HAS COMPLETE CONTROL.
No… Galasso is a periferie, observing the Mikeularity and skating off of his inter-dimensional coattails to subtly communicate with his similarly inspired doppelgangers.
@Zem FOOL! GALASSO WORKS NOT TO PLEASE MIKE. HE HAS BEEN BROUGHT UNDER CONTROL OF GALASSO BY USE OF A STEADY PAYCHECK. GAINING THE USE OF MIKE WAS A CRUCIAL STEP IN GALASSO’S ULTIMATE PLAN.
Really? He goes from a stranglehold over children for his money to a stranglehold over hungry people for his money. There are more hungry people than children, especially near colleges.
Maybe just maybe in that universe, I exist as Conquest’s boyfriend and Glasso’s heir. I’ll go check my alternate reality version of myself chart. . . Nope, I’m still stuck in my rut in that universe as well. Sigh.
wait a second conquestxjoe. joe becoming glasso’s heir and using his leet knowledge to make giant fear inspiring giant robots … that ALSO MAKE PIZZA!!!!!! i fear for this world
He is 83% funnier. Man you need to up your celebrity status until some local place creates an actual Galasso Pizza for their menu.
So folks of the comment page what would go on a Galasso pizza? Probably bacon has it is the EMPEROR OF MEAT. Then probably something unusual to ASSAULT YOUR TASTEBUDS IN A SURPRISE AMBUSH!
Here’s the question I’ve been wondering the whole week long: When going on a date with a chaperone, what do the rules of etiquette say about paying? Joe would probably pay for himself and Joyce if it was just the two of them, but he’d be reluctant to pay for Mike. I don’t know if Joyce promised to pay him (outside of punching freedom). And would he pay himself when there are two chumps he can exploit?
Once everyone’s seated, Joyce is about to order when Galasso points at Joe and says, “You! You will sire an heir upon my daughter.”
Joe says, “Um…sorry, but I’m on a date (sort of) with this woman here…”
“Hmph! Fine. Then you,” Galasso says, rounding on Mike, “will provide me with child.”
“I provided your mom with child. For a nickel.”
“FOOL!” says Galasso. “My mother already has an heir. You are of no use to me. Thus, it is you,” he points to Joyce, “who must mount my daughter and produce an heir worthy of Galasso!”
Joyce turns deep pink and rushes out the door.
“Hmm,” says Mike to Joe, “do I punch him in the face for driving her away before I got paid, or you for taking her here in the first place?”
Soon, SOON, Willis will unfurl his dark plan of quitting webcomicing altogether. Only doling out updates on the Walkyverse when you buy a CPR at his chain of Shortpacked! Toy Stores.
His hand-crafted Dumbiverse experience will DOMINATE your eyeballs, ONLY once you have purchased at least $100 of Galasso’s Pizza’s (and subs).
Then, and only then, shall his faithful armies SPREAD over the surface of this world, and the name of DAVID WILLIS shall be exalted on HIGH!!!
GALASSO IS UNAWARE OF THIS FOOD ITEM KNOWN AS DOM, BUT YOU FIND IT IS INFERIOR TO GALASSO’S SUBS (and pizzas) AND ULTIMATELY PATRONIZE GALASSO’S RESTAURANT, THUS ALLOWING GALASSO TO CRUSH THIS “DOM” WITH HIS IRON FIST AS EASILY AS HE CAN CRUSH THIS — CRUSH THIS…
I want to go to this restaurant. I want to go to this restaurant and be insulted by the owner in his silly hat. Galasso’s Pizza (and Subs) needs to exist.
I think Galasso needs to give Mike beer. We haven’t seen Mike drunk yet in this ‘verse. And I think now would be an amazingly interesting time for him to find it…
Dark Pizza Armies… Does that mean like Pizza Boys and chefs who are soldiers, or actual Soldiers comprised entirely of Pizza?
Also, in the fast Multiverse of Walky’s brain, is there any version of Glasso, who’s actually a powerful dictator capable of taking over the world, instead of a retail/restaurant owner with delusions of grandeur?
I’m in stitches, this really made me laugh! The hat makes him ONE HUNDRED and 83% funnier!
I think Ninja Rick will work here, he could cut pizzas (and subs) with his sword. Unless he’s a PIRATE in this universe!
So, guessing at the staff: Connie and Faz would make great wait staff, Beef is the ideal shape for a chef, and every fiber of my being wants Mike to pick up an application on his way out the door.
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I WANT TO GO HERE.
Make it so, Willis! XD Oh, wait, that would be harder to do than making Dina hats, I guess…
ill take 400 Galasso pizzas. (you should make Galasso pizza and sub advertisement stickers.)
Yesssss yesyesyes!
I second this motion!
I agree wholeheartedly!
I agree with the agreements.
I agree with the agreements about agreeing by wholeheartedly agreeing.
agreed.
Agreed!
I am very much in agreement with this prospect as well.
And where would the pizzas go? I’m thinking in your
FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACE!
I could really go for a pizza (or a sub) right now. Or anytime, really.
Now I’m waiting for McAwesome’s Parasailing and Subs across the street…
It’s a hell yes orgy.
Joe he only talks like that ’cause he’s awesome.
poor Mother Bear’s
this actually seems like a step down for Galasso.
ALL PART OF GALASSO’S GLORIOUS PLAN
WITH TOYS AND PIZZA HE WILL COME TO DOMINATE THE MARKET OF THE YOUTH. THEY WILL DO HIS BIDDING, THEY WILL MARCH IN HIS LOCKSTEP WHEN THEY COME TO POWER. GALASSO IS PATIENT. WHEN THE TIME IS RIGHT HE WILL STEP OUT FROM BEHIND THE SHADOWS AND REVEAL HIMSELF AS THE TRUE POWER ON EARTH.
My theory is that all the Galasso’s in the Walky Multiverses are working together. Each will dominate a specific niche in their designated reality. Then, when the time comes, they will collapse all the possibilities into one, one where GALASSO HAS COMPLETE CONTROL.
Or maybe THEY ARE ALL THE SAME GALASSO!!!!
No, no. Mike is the multiversal singularity, a cauldron of hate incarnated as a man.
Galasso is just… Well, Galasso is Galasso.
No… Galasso is a periferie, observing the Mikeularity and skating off of his inter-dimensional coattails to subtly communicate with his similarly inspired doppelgangers.
When all the Galassos merge into one supreme being, Mike will be that one unpleasable customer in every toy shop and pizza parlor.
@Zem FOOL! GALASSO WORKS NOT TO PLEASE MIKE. HE HAS BEEN BROUGHT UNDER CONTROL OF GALASSO BY USE OF A STEADY PAYCHECK. GAINING THE USE OF MIKE WAS A CRUCIAL STEP IN GALASSO’S ULTIMATE PLAN.
I believe Galasso is a Multiversal Singularity and is jumping from Universe to universe trying to take over the Multiverse.
Actually, that would make a fantastic novel and/or movie. Someone should go write it…
No no no no. The two Galasso’s will have an epic fight to the death for control!
There can only be one!
Really? He goes from a stranglehold over children for his money to a stranglehold over hungry people for his money. There are more hungry people than children, especially near colleges.
What? Is Conquest going to be a waitress or something?
Ugh. I can see the set-up for that one.
“Prepare for my Conquest!”
“Hi, I’m Conquest and I’ll be your waitress…”
Maybe just maybe in that universe, I exist as Conquest’s boyfriend and Glasso’s heir. I’ll go check my alternate reality version of myself chart. . . Nope, I’m still stuck in my rut in that universe as well. Sigh.
wait a second conquestxjoe. joe becoming glasso’s heir and using his leet knowledge to make giant fear inspiring giant robots … that ALSO MAKE PIZZA!!!!!! i fear for this world
(and subs)
I’m sort of envisioning Joe getting the punchline on that one.
did anyone else read the wall?
“Mother bears Crumbled under Galasso’s Iron…”
Glasso remains formidible. I’ve always wondered about the extent of his powers.
That made me smile. This whole comic makes me smile, I feel like its happening where I am, and its awesome.
Iron what?
Iron Fist?
Iron clad CPRs
No, pray let it not be,
Iron army of hand cannon wielding hamsters?
IT’S GALASSO!
A WILD GALASSO APPEARS!
FIGHT ITEM
PKMN RUN
FIGHT ITEM
PKMN >RUN
WILD GALASSO’S SHADOW TAG PREVENTS DEDLOK FROM FLEEING.
>FIGHT ITEM
PKMN RUN
50 MCNUGGETS
SUMMON ULTRACAR
>WITH HIS PENIS
JOYCE’S POWER OF LOVE
You forgot FAAACE!
…IN ORDER TO LEARN
I GIVE IT TO YOU.
SOUNDBUCKET LEARNS I GIVE IT TO YOU.
I am in love with this. I want to work here. I want him to be my boss and I want to listen to this every single day. God I love Galasso.
He is 83% funnier. Man you need to up your celebrity status until some local place creates an actual Galasso Pizza for their menu.
So folks of the comment page what would go on a Galasso pizza? Probably bacon has it is the EMPEROR OF MEAT. Then probably something unusual to ASSAULT YOUR TASTEBUDS IN A SURPRISE AMBUSH!
Angus-and-lutfisk pizza? I remain doubtful.
Huh… I was Dina this morning and now I’m Ethan o.o
Here’s the question I’ve been wondering the whole week long: When going on a date with a chaperone, what do the rules of etiquette say about paying? Joe would probably pay for himself and Joyce if it was just the two of them, but he’d be reluctant to pay for Mike. I don’t know if Joyce promised to pay him (outside of punching freedom). And would he pay himself when there are two chumps he can exploit?
Nice to see Galasso hasn’t changed at all…pizza store aside…
This strip is YES.
Willis, you’re wrong!
84.6%. I calculated.
Imagine the following exchange:
Once everyone’s seated, Joyce is about to order when Galasso points at Joe and says, “You! You will sire an heir upon my daughter.”
Joe says, “Um…sorry, but I’m on a date (sort of) with this woman here…”
“Hmph! Fine. Then you,” Galasso says, rounding on Mike, “will provide me with child.”
“I provided your mom with child. For a nickel.”
“FOOL!” says Galasso. “My mother already has an heir. You are of no use to me. Thus, it is you,” he points to Joyce, “who must mount my daughter and produce an heir worthy of Galasso!”
Joyce turns deep pink and rushes out the door.
“Hmm,” says Mike to Joe, “do I punch him in the face for driving her away before I got paid, or you for taking her here in the first place?”
Personally I think he will choose Joyce before Mike. Not for any specific reason other than his ignorance of gender differences.
Plus I think it would be funnier (and better) with Joyce in the middle. 😀
You forgot the part where Walky, Sal, Dina, and Amber jump out from the storefront wielding compound bows, AKs, and RPGs shouting “Wolverines!”
And the calculus professor is shouting “Avenge me!” from behind a chain link fence.
Soon, SOON, Willis will unfurl his dark plan of quitting webcomicing altogether. Only doling out updates on the Walkyverse when you buy a CPR at his chain of Shortpacked! Toy Stores.
His hand-crafted Dumbiverse experience will DOMINATE your eyeballs, ONLY once you have purchased at least $100 of Galasso’s Pizza’s (and subs).
Then, and only then, shall his faithful armies SPREAD over the surface of this world, and the name of DAVID WILLIS shall be exalted on HIGH!!!
Galasso!!!!!!!!
Excellent.
I’m kinda sad that he’s not a dean, but this is almost as good. And yes, the chef’s hat makes him considerably funnier in this instance.
(and subs)
…with my penis.
Nah, Big Boss or Mrs. Walkerton would make better deans. Galasso just fits better in a delightfully non-essential role.
We’ve already seen Mrs. Walkerton, and she’s very not deany.
Willis,
You make my days better. Your comics are seriously the best thing every.
Thank you
Joe, Joyce is not ready for a dom/(sub) relationship.
I would’ve thought that would be Mike’s thing.
GALASSO IS UNAWARE OF THIS FOOD ITEM KNOWN AS DOM, BUT YOU FIND IT IS INFERIOR TO GALASSO’S SUBS (and pizzas) AND ULTIMATELY PATRONIZE GALASSO’S RESTAURANT, THUS ALLOWING GALASSO TO CRUSH THIS “DOM” WITH HIS IRON FIST AS EASILY AS HE CAN CRUSH THIS — CRUSH THIS…
*hands Galasso a glass*
Paper towels and the first aid kit, quick!
Ah… so it’s one of those wakky theme places where the waiters yell at you (like that one in Chicago)?
YES
Come oooooon, FAZ!
“Dark Pizza Armies” clenched this as the best use of Galasso possible
Galasso is like Batman. Instant comedy!
This put a big smile on my face.
The smile immediately disappeared when I realized that it meant an imminent Faz.
I want to go to this restaurant. I want to go to this restaurant and be insulted by the owner in his silly hat. Galasso’s Pizza (and Subs) needs to exist.
Holy Crap! Definitely my favorite DoA strip so far! Long live Galasso!
Love the newspaper in the background of the last panel. > That hat.
I think Galasso needs to give Mike beer. We haven’t seen Mike drunk yet in this ‘verse. And I think now would be an amazingly interesting time for him to find it…
It’s a shame Mike is (I’m assuming) under 21
Dark Pizza Armies… Does that mean like Pizza Boys and chefs who are soldiers, or actual Soldiers comprised entirely of Pizza?
Also, in the fast Multiverse of Walky’s brain, is there any version of Glasso, who’s actually a powerful dictator capable of taking over the world, instead of a retail/restaurant owner with delusions of grandeur?
In a universe where all things are possible… probably not. Though there is one where he is a Cowboy.
Cowboy or Saloon owner intent on Global Domination through his army of old western crotchety miners?
In the Mirror Universe he is a dictator, but he wishes he could go back to the simple life of a toy store owner.
He also has a goatee.
oh god yes. Galasso working as the owner of a pizza resteraunt.
It fits so well!
i am now content. cause i would so work there.
OH.MY.GOD.
It’s Galasso!!!
*takes pictures
I’d like to have one WORLD DOMINATION Pizza with extra everything, please 😛
Yay, Billie!
Mike will give your mom extra sausage for a nickel.
Scary thought: what if Faz works there as well?
I wouldn’t want him anywhere near my food.
Oh hey, Monkey Master. I am cool with that.
O NO MY BOWTIE, im cool with that.
Merging everything – Galasso’s Pizza (and subs) will be the DOOM for your FAAAAAAAAAAACE!
you forgot one — with his penis.
I’m in stitches, this really made me laugh! The hat makes him ONE HUNDRED and 83% funnier!
I think Ninja Rick will work here, he could cut pizzas (and subs) with his sword. Unless he’s a PIRATE in this universe!
Pirates can still have swords
I reckon Ninja Rick will be the one that cuts the pizza, off screen.
With BURNING JUSTICE.
With justice-Chan!
With his penis.
( I am sincerely sorry)
Ethan? ETHAN? EEEEEEEETTTTTTTTTHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAANNNNNN!!!!!!!!
(Ok maybe Monkey Master is cool too, but still)
So this is where Pizza the Hutt came from… O_o
For some reason, this suits him better than the toy store.
He demands total and unswerving obedience to his master plan, but breadsticks come free when you buy two medium one-topping pizzas. Tough, but fair.
I didn’t realize until just now how much I’ve missed Galasso. Its good to have him back.
No Nick’s, think how joyce will freak out at sink the biz, plus mike can get drunk and be nice
all i can say is, YES! XD
OH GOD DAMNIT. my avatar changed pictures, i want my joyce avi back ;___;
YEAH! The opening panel made me laugh out loud, thanks for that.
This is the most amazing thing ever
Yay! All hail our Mighty Pepporoni Master!
Love the newspaper in the last panel. It’s good to see that even in a different universe, some things remain undeniably the same.
I thought it was Mother Bears for pizza…Alas I am old…
I burst into incontrollable giggles upon seeing the first panel. These only amplified as I read onwards.
Bravo, Willis. Bravo.
So is Galasso like Batman in that he can make anything funny?
That is part of Galasso’s plan, yes. Galasso’s plan has many parts. Some are so complex, he has yet to realize they are part of his plan.
Dammit, I’m Danny again. I liked Leslie. Ah well.
Mmmmm. Pizza.
Joe torn between Joyce and Conquest in 4, 3, 2…
It’ll have to be a longer count… we’ve got the weekend to account for!
You just have to count really, really slowly.
“YES!”
Is what I shouted out-loud when I read the first line of today’s comic in the middle of the quiet office setting where I work.
The next thing I hissed quietly to myself:
“Damn you Willissssss…”
This comic was missing something. Now it is not. Well done Willis, well done.
It’s always nice to see references to my college, especially when it’s a good pizza joint.
All that chef’s hat is missing is Galactus horns on the side.
So, guessing at the staff: Connie and Faz would make great wait staff, Beef is the ideal shape for a chef, and every fiber of my being wants Mike to pick up an application on his way out the door.
I am for all these things.
It makes me sad that this Galasso probably won’t get locked up in a cage by his mutinous employees.
Waiting to see if Conquest, Faz, or Rick show up first…. also seconding the vote that Mike needs to get drunk.
I expect a soup nazi comment from Galasso soon. “No pizza (or subs) for you! Get out!”
This strip gets better all the time.
This reminds me of “No soup for you!”
I think this Galasso has visited our own reality, based on this truck I saw at Comic-Con last summer: (Photo)
That picture is awesome.
Should it not be Galasso’s Pizza (and Subjugation)?
Glasso’s so good at speaking that you can HEAR the parenthesis
That takes some mad skills right there.
Galasso owns a Pizza Place? What a strange world is this
Galasso is in B-Town!
MUST GO HUNTING
That chef hat DOES make him funnier. I didn’t even think that was possible.
I wouldn’t want to work for Galasso thou.
Galasso can never control Mike. One of two things may happen:
He’ll have Galasso’s mom. For a nickel.
…with his penis.
Or he’ll punch him in the faaaaaaaaaace!
so are all the shortpacked dumbversers gonna end up working for Galasso?
If something like this ever existed, the owners of Pizza Hut and Dominoes would wet themselves in fear.
Anyone remember Megas XLR? I can’t help but imagine Galasso as having Warmaster Gorrath’s voice (Clancy Brown).
I think your off by a few percentage points. I’m think it’s more like 86-89% funnier.
So I wonder what happened to Papa Bruin.
Nothing, in this universe, since it wasn’t called that here.
That kinda makes me sad, I would of liked to have seen the story as how Glasso took it over.
Galasso took over Mother Bear’s Pizza in Dumbing of Age, not Papa Bruin’s. That is what I mean by “it is not called that here.”
Oh, can we have that story sometime then? Though it kinda feels like I might be the only one.
OH MY GOD WILLIS YOU’RE KILLING ME HERE.
I already got a good laugh out of the strips so far, but Galasso working in a pizza joint is the icing on the cake.
Wonderful, just wonderful.
So…in one universe, eh’s the manager of a toy store…and in this universe, he’s the owner of a pizzaria…huh.