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paulaptb @paulaptb.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
Winter’s Politics
@winterspolitics.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
Ph03n1x24 @ph03n1x24.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
Sheryl Weikal (The Leftist Lawyer) @leftistlawyer.com ⋅ 1d
Polling USA @usapolling.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
onion person @junlper.beer ⋅ 2d
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so how much is in there from the whiteboard ding dong bandit
Enough to pay for all the pizzas.
I initially read this as paying for the pizzazz. Some of those ding-dongs were jazzy and vivacious. they were doing jizz-hands
–jazz hands, I mean jazz hands. D:
Not sure if that is better or worse.
Paying for the pizzaz is worse than paying for pizzas because it does not involve delicious pizza for you (or me) to eat.
The ding dongs were doing jizz-hands.
That’s less a Freudian slip than a Freudian dive.
It was beautiful one too. A flawless 900 flip with 1080 rotation, penetrating with almost no displacement; not a splash was seen and barely a ripple. It was so magnificent, one of the judges was moved to tears as he raised his 10.
The judge was later quoted as, at that time, feeling an intense pang of regret for every other 10 he had ever given, because he was unable of giving Leorale a better score for the level of perfection he was previously unable to imagine.
Meanwhile the next judge holds up their 10, only to put the 9 in front of it for added measure…
There is at least one thread a week that causes my sides to hurt from hysterical laughter. This, this is one of them.
You guys are the best.
Sure you did.
Probably the tamest party in existence
You should see Amber’s.
Amber has Amazi partys
I’d go to an Amber party
“Tampon” Geez Billie you kiss Ruth with that mouth?!
damn it you beat me to the joke!
“No, but I did something with your mother with this one!”
And it only cost me a nickel.
Not even all the ice on the maple leaves hockey rink is enough for that burn.
She pulls Ruth’s tampons out with that mouth.
Strawberry dip!
Ruth makes my heart hurt
Tampon! there I said it and I don’t feel bad at all!… well… okay maybe that was a little harsh… I’m sorry!… okay I’ll go wash my mouth out with soap…
What’s the big deal? It doesn’t hurt anybody! Fuck, fuckity-fuck-fuck-fuck!
Gasp!
The switch from transparent to solid background in panels five and six makes it seem like her declaration is being punctuated by a flag appearing behind her.
The Maple Leafs proudly support Billie attending Joyce’s party.
“I can’t always be keeping you here.”
Ohhhhhhhhh Canada!
My home and native laaaaaand!
She just wants to keep Billie glorious and free.
She just want to be left alone ;_;
CANADA!
Probably the only country with a strategic maple syrup reserve.
There will also be nickels from Mike since he’s a walking motherfucker even without saying so.
He must make baristas and homeless people very happy.
Only if they have swear jars. ^_^
Life Hack!
That last panel makes me laugh a lot harder than I expected
Billie said the wrong thiiiiing
Oh nooooes
You fucked up, you fucked up, you fucked up
I wouldn’t worry. “The wrong thing” constitutes at least half of what comes out of Billie’s mouth, and she seems to be doing okay so far.
…oh no. I just realized Billie is buying a ticket for the Disaster Lottery every time she opens her mouth.
I hope mike doesn’t get a hold of that quarter, he could fuck like 5 moms!
It amazes me that menstruation is still misunderstood in this day and age.
What, exactly, is misunderstood about it?
It’s the idea that something associated with women’s blood is going to be “dirty” (hence, a swear word).
It’s not the blood, it’s that it goes in that downstairs area that Joyce doesn’t want to think or talk about or even admit that she has because it’s associated with sex. I’m pretty sure even Joyce wouldn’t make you put money in the Swear Jar for saying “band-aid”. (Though Johnson & Johnson might make you put money in their Genericizing Our Trademark Jar.) This says some pretty awful things about Joyce’s upbringing and mental state, but I don’t think misunderstanding menstruation is it, exactly.
Y’know, it wouldn’t surprise me at all to find out that Joyce uses pads, because she thinks that putting even a tampon in there is going to get added to her sexual shame reel for her entrance interview in Heaven.
“And everybody please, watch your gosh darned language!” Tony Stark, 2015.
“Language…” Captain America, 2015…
SPOILERS
aw jeez. wish billie hadn’t let that slip out
At least she didn’t let it slip in.
Le Tampon is also an actual place, there is even The church of Le Tampon where all the sins are wiped away just by saying “Hail Bloody Mary”.
Interesting to compare that to Dildo, Newfoundland.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dildo,_Newfoundland_and_Labrador
I wonder if it will allow you easier access to Climax Georgia?
Perhaps to Climax, Saskatchewan, which is a considerable way from Love, Saskatchewan.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Climax,_Saskatchewan
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Love,_Saskatchewan
When are we getting to good old Fucking?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fucking,_Austria
Or Intercourse.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Intercourse,_Pennsylvania
Although people who refer to having sex as “intercourse” probably wouldn’t be caught dead doing it with people who call it “fucking”.
And some of us will gladly associate with either or both. Because no matter what you call it it’s still all good.
On the other hand, the townsfolk of Ramsbottom are much more fond of the ‘rear-door action’ if you catch my drift.
You people are all going to Hell (Michigan)
Michigan where you can go from climax to paradise and then to hell. also where hell freezes over every year
Is ‘willy’ worth a quarter?
Nah, just a dime at most, cock is worth a quarter.
Where’s Willy only works with paper currency.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Where%27s_Willy%3F
This comic makes me wonder if their relationship will go wrong faster than I thought. Billie letting that slip seems like something Ruth will pretend didn’t hurt her too much now, but might have hurt her more than she shows, and I think Ruth doesn’t need to many moments like that in order to give up.
Eh, it could be a problem if Billie’s first comment was serious. I viewed it as more a gut reaction. She hasn’t been dating for long enough to remember that the presence of cute boys is no longer relevant to her life.
(But it could easily go either way, I admit)
I’m sure Billie wasn’t serious but the real question is if Ruth knows.
When you’re as depressed as she is it’s not that hard to blow something like that way out of proportion.
Well, she let it slip. The big question is if at a party she’ll slip back into that again…
*Insert obvious “Don’t you mean let it slip back in” joke here…*
*Open 1 serving canned laughter…*
From the get go, Ruth’s take on this relationship is that she’s holding Billie back. She can’t let go of the mindset.
NOT related to today’s strip, but it just occurred to me: would Ethan be jealous or resenting of Danny once he finds out Dan’s bisexual? Would Ethan’s feeling turn to something like “Dammit why do you get to choose and I don’t!?”
I dunno. Ethan seems like a pretty chill dude. Then again, it’s always the quiet ones. At most, I feel there’d be some level of resentment, though I think Ethan would do his best to be cool about it.
I dunno… I don’t feel like this will ever become an issue? Like, as things stand now, the Danny/Amber/Ethan situation is doomed to crash and burn pretty quickly.
Inevitably, Danny is either going to accidentally cheat on Amber with Ethan and he’ll confess or she’ll catch them, or that he will tell Amber about his newly realized bisexual leanings and she won’t be able to deal with a second boyfriend coming out of the closet. Ethan will choose Amber over whatever tension he has with Danny. Either way, sad times for everyone for awhile.
I really don’t think that Danny’s got it in him to be a cheater. Dude loves his (serial) monogamy. Plus there’s the whole false stereotype of bisexuals as cheaters that I rather think Willis would avoid.
Before establishing that he’s bi, Danny was already thoroughly established as centrally loyal and devoted and monogamous to a fault. It’s one of the many reasons I love that Danny was the choice for the Great Bisexual Retconning.
I agree with your characterization of Danny.
Well, I was imagining something more like what already happened once. Where Ethan tackled Danny and landed on top of him. I think Ethan needs only a little push(such as the feeling that Danny appreciates the attention or some such) to make him act on the impulse to kiss him. Nothing Danny purposely instigates or encourages. An impulsive act on the part of another that he will confess to Amber out of guilt.
Amber’s crazy will end the relationship long before Danny ever cheats.
I feel like Amber’s crazy is a little too scary for Danny to end the relationship. She’ll have to be the one who ends it, and that will only come if there’s a reason.
I’m willing to bet that Amber will be the one to end the relationship, but I wouldn’t bet on it being because of possible cheating on Danny’s part. Amazi Girl is Amber’s preferred persona right? I think something bad will happen, and that something will make Amber think she can’t be Amazi Girl anymore. And part of shedding that persona will be dumping Danny.
But then I’m a pessimist, so…
I think it would depend exactly on Danny’s actions.
If he decided to still date Amber then yeah, I can see some jealousy and resentment on Ethan’s part because he wasn’t able to keep doing that after realising his true sexuality.
If he decided to date Ethan, I’m sure it wouldn’t matter quite as much to him because his ability to be sexually attracted to both would have actually played in Ethan’s favour.
We’ll see when the time comes.
Okay, Joyce party, yes. But attended by Roz, Mike, and Billie. I can see it becoming something Ruth would want to know about.
Should I be setting up the blackmail-cams- I mean fun time recording cameras… >_> <__>
Pretty sure Mike won’t actually be attending, given his reaction to the conditions of his invitation.
ah crapplesauce. that must really be hurting Ruth. That would sure put me in the dumps and I’m not already depressed. The way her face squares up like that also really makes the situation seem more pronounced. Like it’s very visible when she is upset.
Open mouth. Insert foot.
Repeat as unnecessary…
Because she’s an alcoholic with depression.
Billie you fucking idiot. You stupid piece… you have a simpatico girlfriend who’s given you mind-blowing orgasms on multiple occasions sitting 6 inches away from you, and you’re complaining about a lack of people to screw.
Ruth deserves WAY better than this blithering idiot.
Billie definitely isn’t the best person for Ruth right now. She’s too self absorbed at this point, and likely will stay that way for a long time to come. Ruth’s problems are pretty obviously more severe, but I also get the impression she might get past them easier than Billie will get past hers, if conditions are right. But that’s a pretty big might, as right now a giant crash and burn seems far more likely.
Neither of the two is good for the other. In fact, I’m pretty sure Ruth herself described their relationship as a “sexy lesbian suicide pact”.
Well, if ‘tampon’ is worth a quarter, then ‘fuck’ is easily worth a dollar. Speaking of ‘fuck’, you just did with that remark, Billie. As in ‘up’ I mean. Poor Ruth is insecure enough as it is. Now she’ll think you prefer tube steak to bearded clams.
Even “damn” is worth more than $20.
I would think the t-word would be “tits.” Just saying.
Maybe that would be the t-t word instead?
I see what you did there.
Tit can’t be a bad word, its just a type of bird
Billie, you idiot.
The highlight of a Joyce party: Spin-the-Bottle, except instead of kissing, you need to say something nice about the other person.
Mike would so win at this. Too bad he’s not attending.
Oh, wait, no alcohol anyway.
Sober Mike would be the best at that game. How many rounds of things that are technically complimentary but the target doesn’t want to hear, or doesn’t want others at the party to hear, do you think they’d have to go through before no one there would ever play that game again?
(Say what you want about Mike, but stopping that kind of game is a service to humanity.)
Joyce and Hannelore have similar taste in party games, then?
Joyce and Hanners meeting would be bizarre.
I imagine Hanners would throw a fit at the mention of creationism.
Just reading that made me want to drop out of a fictional college just to get away from that party
Language!
Is no one going to comment that Bagge just said “language”?
You kiss your momma with that mouth?
No, but Mike does.
Really! There are hardly any movies today that dont carry a warning because they contain “language”. Its shocking how much people talk in movies. There should be more movies about mimes.
Talkies ruined everything.
Damn Billie that was harsh as fuck. Are you mad at Ruth or something? Why would you say that to your girlfriend? …She IS your girlfriend, right? Not just a fwb?
Because she’s an idiot.
At what point did you think Billie made good decisions?
They’re not FWB, they’re in an alcoholic bisexual suicide pact.
*Keeps reloading previous page to see when latest 1 shows up.*
*Repeats reload several times, usually around the 30 minute marks.*
*2 hours after expecting new page to load, tries using RSS feed link. discovers page has been up for a while & already has 65 comments…*
Ahh ouch, that’s a slip up that’s gonna come back to haunt her.
Way to stick your foot in it, Billie.
The problem is you can’t be a nurse and a girlfriend. Ruth, seek professional help, don’t try and put that off on your date.
A “sear jar”?
Is that, like… a thing? An actual one?
swear*
It’s a common gag in comics, if anything. Can’t say I ever saw one in real life. Maybe it’s US-specific ?
i dont know if its us specific or not but i know its usually for little kids
my family didnt personally have one but i think some of my friends did
When I watched season 1 of Game of Thrones at a friend’s house, his mom came into the room with a swear jar after the scene with Melisandre in the sewer. The one with the shadow aberration. Needless to say, my friend went; “Oh, fuck. Oh, fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.” etc etc, you get the picture.
I don’t remember how much money he had to put on it.
I prefer vaginal flood stopper……no just me?
Or you could just go with “Moses.”
To part the Red Sea?
Gosh, I feel so bad for Ruth. She’s my favorite character but Willis seems to delight in tormenting her, both in walkyverse and this one. Even this relationship… of course everyone knows it’s a rocky relationship that isn’t likely to go to good places, but it’s always Billie hurting Ruth, not the other way around.
Well in the Walkyverse he didn’t so much torture her as “kill her with a truck”. I have to say that’s not a bad way to go if it’s quick. Now getting killed with a truck and then waking up a few minutes later, that fucking hurts like a mother.
I like to think that panel four is her political opinion.
She’s toeing the party line.
Uvula!
Masticate!
Meniscus!
(Joyce would kick me out for my dirty science mouth.)
I’m guessing uvula is supposed to resemble “vulva”; what’s “meniscus” supposed to resemble other than the little curved bubble of water?
I forsee a DAMN YOU WILLIS moment upcoming….Billie goes to the party, discovers Becky is living there….tells Ruth…DUN DUN DUNNNNNNN
And Ruth will procede to…..not care.
And then Ruth surprises everyone in and out of comic by figuring out a way to hide Becky, or finding her someplace to stay nearby. After all she knows what it’s like to lose your family and lose your home.
and having your only familiar alternative be an abusive jerk
tho if this is what happens i’ll fuckin tattoo a maple leaf on my right buttcheek as appreciation of her Canadian Problem Solving skills, that’s like beyond a best case scenario but it could happen
<— Having flashbacks to George Carlin's Seven Words You Can't Say on the Radio: "Shit, Fuck, Cock, conga, Cocksucker, Motherfucker and… Tits."
(Seriously? Tits?)
Tvtropes says it better than I ever could: http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/ArsonMurderAndJaywalking
The 2nd panel is a shitty thing for Billie to say. However, I can’t help but realize that she’s relied on men’s attraction to her as a big source of self-esteem as she’s floundered at the University. Her failing to get that reaction out of Joe was one factor that lead to her heartfelt plea to Ruth that lead to a kiss. It honestly does feel like a default reaction for her to have. She should still try to curb that while she’s in a relationship, though…
On the other hand I was surprised that Billie never actually tried to quit booze for Ruth, so what the hell do I know.
Just from a purely technical viewpoint, this comic is seven panels and it doesn’t feel cramped. That’s some expert-level shit. Well done!
Please go to the counseling center you two.
Plot twist: the one who said “tampon” is Joyce.
A party with no booze isnt a party at all, thats just being in a room full of people you dont even like enough to hang out with normally. A party WITH booze is still that, but the booze makes them interesting enough to make the whole experience worth the bother.
Omg it took me a couple of months but, I actually caught up.
Cool my avatar is walky!